Short Jow Forums exercise!

Short Jow Forums exercise!

Go to Nederdraad
Read (fucking anything) aloud
Try not to laugh

Hard mode: try to read it in actual dutch

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rude

*roooode

vocaroo.com/i/s1a6fpmnzewD

BASED

Danish sounds worse

We're talking about human languages

Some anons were having a chat and I tried reading a fragment of their conversation:
>ik ben hem niet, ik zeg alleen dat je beter van dale kunt gebruiken
>Maar ik ben helemaal niet aan het rolspelen.
>Ben je mijn docent Nederlands ofzo? Houd gewoon je smoel ja
>ja dat ben ik, en straks ga ik je billenkoek geven en moet je weer onder mijn bureau op je knieën.
vocaroo.com/i/s1hx22hFuPeJ
No bully this is just how I imagine Dutch sounds like with my limited experience

why do desert amis have such an inferiority complex to Europeans?

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Also I have a feeling I've just read a gay LARP lmao

niet kul junge

well you read a conversation on a general so that goes without saying
also, that's a pretty decent pronounciation of the words

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kek, I knew it. I used to learn Dutch for the memes so I know a bunch of words and some basic grammar. I can get kinda a feel for what goes on in /nederdraad/ but not really.
The thing is that I've never actually said anything out loud myself, because your spelling is dyslexia-tier and I mix things up when speaking, and I have no idea how I'm supposed to pronunce the letter "R" since I've heard so many variants.

Oh.

most people here don't know how to spell our own words, especially the 'dt'-words like 'wordt'
I don't know what you mean by 'R' variants though, 'R' always sounds the same

Does it?
>It can be pronounced with a tap of the tip of the tongue, a contortion of the middle of the tongue, a gurgle from the throat, or any of a handful of other ways.
>Sometimes it sounds like a rolled Spanish r, sometimes like a guttural French one, and in the city of Leiden you’ll even hear a distinctly American-sounding rhotic arrr.
Oftentimes I've heard people saying it guturally, and sometimes in a very American way (I watched a video of a woman speaking like that), with the occasional rolled "r". I either roll it or pronunce it the Leiden way, because otherwise I would get lost in all the phlegm sounds.

Is dit nou dezelfde autist die dag en nacht deze draden maakt?

yeah, you're actually right
just tried pronouncing some words with your examples and the gurgle from the throat does sound very 'hollands'

so there are different dialects to pronounce 'R', but still within that dialect the 'R' is always pronounced the same way
so you can pick one and stick with it, the proper official way to pronounce 'R' is tapping with the tip of your tongue though

vocaroo.com/i/s0RONjvDxaWt

Be careful with how you pronounce the R. If you pronounce it the wrong way you may be mistaken for randstad and send to mandatory rehabilitation

You started so good, but ended at 'u wan java tutorial?'-tier

ker ker kor kar kig gig gor

Doooooooood, Hitler XD

wat nou 'Dooood, Hitler'?

hitler did WHAT now??

*roed

such a damned curious language

vocaroo.com/i/s1Ki0Vmglx62

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"Nu" and "Nou" are a bit confusing to me. I found this online
>Er is overlap in betekenis, maar verschil in gebruik. De woordjes worden gebruikt als bijwoord, tussenwerpsel en voegwoord. Als bijwoord is nou iets intensiever, en als tussenwerpsel is nu heel formeel.
Is it accurate?

If you are here to trigger anons with a toothpaste flag you shouldn't even bother. Our thread is full with mutts and foreigners.

I laughed so hard I literally sharted.

Nou is used in specific cases and can be changed with nu most of the time.
It's one of those things which make Dutch hard to fully master since the grammatical rule is pretty much 'just get a feeling for it lol'

What motivates a person to learn Dutch. Is it self harm?

maybe he's a mormon

Don't they believe Jesus spoke American?

>'just get a feeling for it lol'
Isn't that like the entirety of Dutch grammar?
I got memed into studying it because "dude it's easy just and just like English lmao", then I got unironically interested, and started learning it properly. I've lost my motivation in the meantime though, because most Dutch people I've talked to online have been boring and cold.
I still like how it looks and sounds, which is why I refresh my vocabulary every now and again, even though I'll probably never use any of it.
I also like the Netherlands a lot and would move there if I had the chance desu
Calvinist actually.

they believe Jesus spoke to the Indians/ Americans/ lost tribe of Israel

but anyway, their adherents are big into missionary work and learn a lot of obscure languages so they can better mingle with those they're trying to convert to their sect

>I've lost my motivation in the meantime though, because most Dutch people I've talked to online have been boring and cold.
There's a lot of very cool people here but they have plenty of friends and aren't interested in meeting new people online. Hence Dutch flags are so fucking awful online, they're mainly social outcast

Have you ever been here?

>Have you ever been here?
I wish I could, but it seems very expensive and there's no way I can tour the Netherlands reasonably with my poorfag salary.

That's a shame, though I wouldn't go here unless you've seen a lot of other places first. So many brown people spend a year salary on taking some pictures in Amsterdam it's insane

what is there to do in that city? it's so featureless in my mind's eye, there's the canals, anne frank, heineken, and??? smoking? debauchery? sick vices aren't exactly all that unique

A lot of museums. Though in general Amsterdam is popular because most of it was build in the same uniform style with a lot of greenery, narrow streets and the famous canals. Combined with heaps of bars and restaurants it's not a bad place to spend a few days just walking around.
At this point the hype is bigger than the city itself, but that's not their fault.

oh right, van gogh has his works there, and your famous rijksmuseum, how could I forget that

The only problem with Amsterdam is that it's like a fifth the size of London, Paris and Berlin but from a tourist perspective is equally big if not bigger. Only Venice, Rome and Florence have it worse.

Most people don't care about those museums beyond being able to take some pictures of themselves in front of the Rijksmuseum.
Really most tourism to Amsterdam at this point are wealthy 3rd world millenials that want to impress their peers with some European cheapskates mixed in who come to smoke weed and drink Heineken from the supermarket.
Fastest growing restaurants in Amsterdam are McDonald's and Burger King because tourists there aren't spending a cent too much.

The new city council is cracking down on this tourism though in the end you can't just ban people from buying at McDonald's and supermarkets (Italy is doing this).

wew

government designated restaurants, only in italy!

I have no idea how it officially works, but this is how I see it: 'nu' is used when you're referring to the current time, so when you say 'wat is er nu aan de hand?', you're more closely asking what is happening at the current time. 'Nou' can be used anytime you use 'nu', but it will sound a bit less formal.

'Nou' kan also be used as you'd use the english 'well': 'well, actually...' will be 'nou, eigenlijk...'

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I don't think the type of tourism Italy and Amsterdam have to deal with happens anywhere else on earth. It's a typical example of the free market completely failing to tackle a problem since rather than limiting the amounts of people and problems, the market just comes up with more hotel rooms for lower prices in shittier locations

Thanks for the explanation fren

reminds me
youtu.be/c379Giun-Co

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