Whenever I want to watch a video with my girlfriend, I'll watch the entire thing attentively, but she'll either not look, play on her phone, or look at her computer.
I've actually expressed wanting her to actively watch with me, but her argument is "Well I'm still listening."
How do I get her to understand that 90% of a video is...the video part?
Let it go. What difference does it actually make to you?
Let go of the ego. I'm 99% you do the same thing.
It's not the biggest deal, but it really does bother me, and I can't let it go. The lack of attentiveness makes me feel like she doesn't care at all, and it sucks because I'll put my full attention into whatever she shows me, and she never does the same.
What ego even is there? Is it egotistical for me to not want her to miss parts so she'll enjoy videos and movies more? Come on. Visual symbolism is a big part of TV and movies. I totally understand that I can't force anyone to watch something, but it really would be nice for her to not ask me what's going on when she could have seen for herself.
You probably make her watch stuff way too often and never things she was interested in
T. Similar situation
She's not interested in watching your video. If she wanted to watch it, she would watch it. If she's not looking at the video while it's playing but can hear it, she would start paying attention to parts that interest her without you asking her to do so. Why would she enjoy watching something that she doesn't want to watch? Play something that she's actually interested in. Your own lack of attentiveness to her various interests while trying to get her to watch something she has little to no interest in is probably annoying her. You might be giving her the impression that you either don't pay attention to or don't care about her interests and, by association, maybe her personality as well. Also, if you're giving full attention to things that she shows you when you're not interested in those things, she might think that you enjoy whatever she's showing you. She might enjoy the false thought that both of you enjoy the topics in those videos if you're giving that impression. Do you want to have the kind of relationship in which both people pretend to enjoy participating in each other's interests to keep each other happy? Everyone is different to some degree. My SO is a Filipino martial arts fanatic. I have little to no interest in it and do not participate, but I can appreciate the fact that he enjoys it. He loves spam, but he doesn't cook it for me and ask me to eat it because he knows that I hate it. Before I make pancakes, I ask him if he wants any. I make him some if he says yes. He turns on Community, and we both watch it because we enjoy it. I leave the room when he wants to watch "My 600lb Life". At the end of the day, nobody's offended because we respect each other's boundaries. Just look for things that both of you enjoy enough to do and do them together.
Does she actually want to watch the video? You probably wouldn't pay attention if she put on a beauty tutorial or something either.
This
do you live in arizona?
>tfw you will never have a qt Filipino bf to feed you spam
I think I know this couple. They're absolutely awful. The dude is like 300 pounds and 40 years old and the girl is like 20 and hot but really stupid.
>beauty tutorial
what is wrong with women?
you try putting on makeup. it's not easy jabbing a pencil in and around your eye.
Bumpers
This guy called "The Skeptic Feminist" on youtube had the same problem. He resolved it though.
Absolutely incorrect. I already watch videos that she loves. I've been poring through her subscibed list on YouTube trying to find one damn video she won't do this to.
I literally fucking am watching shit that she loves. We both have a vested interest from the very start of our relationship watching videos and shit together. Pretty much most of the time we're watching videos that she suggested, and that I've never seen, and she still does this. Half the time the videos come from stuff she's subscribed to.
I watch things all the way through even if I don't really like them because I'm not an asshole and I'm actually interested in her life and what she does. Even if I have no interest at all, it's still interesting to see things I've never tried or thought about, and get new perspectives on those things.
I already do watch those all the time.
I have no idea why it's so hard for you guys to accept that I actually am trying to make a solution and it's just not working. Please, just offer something to help.
>I watch things all the way through even if I don't really like them because I'm not an asshole
Stop and think for a second man, you just implied that your own gf is an asshole for not paying attention to a YouTube video. Figure out if this is why you're really angry, or if this feeling is rooted in something else
Wow it's almost like she doesn't give a shit about whatever you want to watch and wants to spend time with you
I'm not going to lie, I actually do think it's kind of an assholeish thing to do. Is it seriously that demanding to ask for someone's attention for 1, 2, 5 minutes? Is it seriously that unreasonable?
Can you please read the thread before commenting. Most of the time we're literally watching things SHE wants to watch. (And that I like also.)
>Is it seriously that unreasonable?
Yes. I get the same feeling you do with my wife - we will watch something she wants to watch, and then I'll catch her on instagram. Woman is gonna woman.
Just wait until you've been living together a few years, she rushes you to get ready for an event she picked out and she takes another half hour while you're sitting in front of the door. She is going to do little things that drive you nuts, just as there are things that seem innocuous to you that she doesn't like either. It's a relationship man.
The thing is, you're seemingly making it out to be a thing that women just do, but I'm also a woman and I don't do that kind of thing at all. I, again, pay full attention to things anyone shows me not just my girlfriend (because they were excited to show me them, so why not?). I really don't think that this is something I can just shrug off, even if it's little - that's why I have to find some sort of solution for this. No one else I know has done this. It's just her.
I keep forgetting being gay is 'normal' now
Sorry, I only have a hetero perspective
I wish i had a Girlfriend......
My crushing loneliness.....
I have healthy teeth, but they are kinda yellow.
Are those coal toothpastes on Amazon a scam or are they really effective? Are there some possible health related issues with using them?
Some facts about me:
* 23 y/o.
* I usually drink a coffee in the morning and a tea in the evening, but nothing more.
* Appart from that, I only drink water.
>women gonna women
Jfc how retarded are You? I had an ex bf who would text other people on his phone while going down on me.and a different ex bf who would text and take calls in the middle of a date in a restaurant. An Asshole is an asshole, sex has nothing to do with it you moron
>We both have a vested interest from the very start of our relationship watching videos and shit together.
As one of the late 30-something anons here, I got to say that having a fight over watching YouTube videos may be the most petty Millennial shit I've ever heard.
>Please, just offer something to help.
Clearly you just need to break up with her, user, and find someone with a shared love of the cinema of YouTube. I mean, that one will also do something that drives you crazy, such as perhaps using the wrong filters on Instagram or being inept at snapchatting, but you can then just break up with that one and move onto the next. You'll eventually die old and alone, but if you can't find a qt girlfriend who can appreciate all the same things you do and in the same exact way, you're better off alone anyway.
I have 100% the same problem user
and she isn't really paying attention, she misses half of the program because of the stupid phone
phone addiction is extremely irritating.
So ignore the problem?
Don't talk about it?
real healthy guys
Realize the problem is with you, not her, and move the fuck on.
Fyi, you're also a millennial unless you were born before 1980 (38 years old or less). And the current 18 year olds are actually cobsidered a new generation from millenials. How are you in your late 30s, yet still using stupid meme labels instead of words to express your true ideas and feelings? You sound just as bad as the "milenials" youre bitching about
It's my fault she is addicted to her phone?
I am not OP, but am in a similar situation
She uses her phone about 90% of the time she is not at work.
Shut down you fucking phone
Bitch
I'm Generation X, but I feel some similarities with both generational labels. That said, I don't really care about labels, they're just convenient. And I generally like younger people (why I hang out here), but having a shit fit about your girlfriend not appreciating your YouTube videos still sounds like the most petty Millennial shit ever. It's like something I would expect a 40-something to concoct for a Disney channel sitcom and I would pass it off as too stereotypical and contrite to be real.
look: there's a lot of digital ink spilled itt, but it seems to me that she just kind of sucks. or at least, it would be a deal breaker for me. texting during a movie, or during dinner, not being *present*: maybe this is the new digital age or w/e, but it smacks me as emotionally needy and immature.
there's no way that you're gonna be able to change her on this, i think.
nah, life's too short to put up with bitches who are *always* on their phone.
What is the answer that you are looking for here, user? Do you need us to give you permission to break up with her? You can break up with her for whatever reason you want.
>and find someone with a shared love of the cinema of YouTube.
if this is your idea for the foundation of a healthy relationship you're facked
OP, talk to her about it, but at the end of the day it is only 1 aspect of the relationship
Not sure what answer I seek, but i'm not stupid enough to throw away a good relationship because of 1 problem.
Jesus you guys are extreme, its not like shes cheating on me or some actually impactful shit.
I was just pointing out to OP that yeah phone addiction is a problem for lots of people
i'm gonna talk to her about it
thanks for nothin 4 chan
why do you come to Jow Forums? You don't try to help.. ever
>1 aspect
its the canary in the coal mine. she's not a good one.
You didn't say she was addicted to her phone. You said she didn't pay attention to the YouTube videos you force her to watch.
You sound like a whiny dipshit. I hope she breaks up with you immediately and find a real man / woman who can satisfy her.
lol
spoken like a true Jow Forums INCEL shitposter
>i'm gonna talk to her about it
That was the Jow Forumsice you whiny bitch
Fuck, if I was your gf I'd be on my phone all the time too
She's bored, try doing other stuff instead. I suggest cuddling.
You're a fucking idiot who doesn't understand the issue, like apparently 90% of you retarded users.
Stop bumping this thread
How about you go fuck yourself
You really have some issues, OP. Sincerely. You sound controlling and angry and perhaps you should work on yourself rather than get so upset about your girlfriend not liking your YouTube videos.
Not OP. Fuck yourself.
Put it on in another language, with subtitles so she can't use the excuse of "I'm listening"
>Problem solved
Hey, so this is a thing I do a lot, though it doesn't give my partner the rage aneurysm it seems to give you, thankfully. I have trouble focusing, and while I've never technically been diagnosed because too poor to psych, I wouldn't be surprised if I had some sort of mental issue that makes it hard for me to just sit and watch tv/videos unless they're 100% engaging or I'm in the right state of mind. Is there a chance your girlfriend has something along those lines?
Additionally, some people are just raised with different levels of "politeness". Texting while with someone might be incredibly rude to you, for example, but to a lot of other people, it's not really a big deal. That kind of disconnect is frustrating to be sure, but unless she's blatantly ignoring you or these attempts to do something with her, I don't think it's fair to think less of her for what is almost certainly just different priorities. You're not less of an asshole because you have a different idea of what's polite in this situation (obviously the same argument can't be made for a society-wide social thing, like idk smoking in a rideshare without asking is probably universally considered rude in the US whereas your situation isn't quite the same).
Maybe she just likes to "watch" videos that way. Maybe she's a more attentive listener and that's how she primarily enjoys absorbing content. I would recommend you figure out why this is frustrating to you in particular and express that to her directly and have a real, productive discussion rather than coming to Jow Forums to basically ask how to either trick her into or force her into watching videos exactly the way you want her to watch them.
I have trouble sitting still and focusing on something passively. It's not that I'm lazy or inattentive, I am just very active and need to be physically engaged to pay attention to something. If I'm at a meeting or in class, I have to doodle or take notes or something or my mind drifts. I can absolutely focus on something that requires active engagement from me though, like coding or writing, so it's not like I have ADHD. I would drive OP crazy too. What a nut he is.
Didn't answer. Ha. Bet it is her / them. Total losers, both of them.
I can actually sort of relate to OP. People are defending his GF because they think hes showing her random ass dumb Youtube videos. I have a friend who does this for entire movies, movies they recommended we watch as a group. They'll spend 80% of the movie on their phone despite claiming how much they love the movie and wanted to watch it again. Or if its a movie they haven't seen but wanted to see, they'll constantly ask "What did I miss? What is going on? Who is that?" Every minute.