How would I go about approaching this girl that takes the bus with me to college (once a week).
She has been sitting next to me every day she goes to college, on the way to and back. She's really shy and quiet (apparently), since differently from the other girls in the bus she doesn't seek out any group. She just sits there, sometimes puts her earbuds on and sleeps, or just sleeps.
She's really beautiful and it's been driving me crazy that I don't know how to approach her without sounding creepy (even though I rarely have this problem with random people).
What I know about her: >24 years old (4 years older than me) >studies architecture >her dad was in hospital a while ago due to pneumonia >still lives with her parents
Don't really want to use that intel because it would sound creepy in an opener. I'll pretend I don't know anything about her at first.
Any advice?
Pic related, looks kind of like her, but she wears more clothes in the bus (although some of the tank tops she wore this summer drove me crazy).
>Don't really want to use that intel because it would sound creepy in an opener. Don't really want to use that intel because it would sound creepy in an opener.
>I don't want to be creepy, I'll just lie!
By the way, this is the main part:
>I don't know how to approach her without sounding creepy
There's is no way for you to not be creepy at this point, you've been creeping on her for a long time.
Why is a stranger on the bus your best shot at a girl? Analyze that for a second and you'll see why this is creepy.
Jacob Reed
I ain't gonna try to sugarcoat it. I understand I have been kind of creepy (although not directly towards her).
I haven't really stalked her or stared at her. I just took a few glimpses of her sometimes.
What I know about her is because: >i've heard her talking once to another shy girl, in the seat behind mine (around 5 weeks ago) >she told the bus driver about her dad when she took the bus in front of the hospital once (two weeks ago) >the bus driver mentioned she's the oldest person in the bus once (last year)
I only really got interested in her about 3 weeks ago, when I realized she began to sit next to me.
>Why is a stranger on the bus your best shot at a girl? I just want to at least meet her...
Juan Price
"i've seen you around and i thought i'd say hi", don't make an elephant out of a fly
Tyler Watson
>I just want to at least meet her...
Again, why focus so much on a person that doesn't even know you exist? Go flirt with girls you know girls that already like you and that you know have things in common. Girls you can ask out without it being creepy.
>I haven't really stalked her or stared at her. I just took a few glimpses of her sometimes.
Yeah, and you've been eavesdropping personal information about her. And you keep saying she drives you crazy. You've invested energy in this, from afar like a creepo, and if you talk to her, that will come out. Imagine her just not being interested in you after you've been obsessing over her for a month?
But let's focus on the first part. We both know you've been creepy. The question is, why even dreep on her?
Grayson Reed
>why this is creepy Come on, its normal. Have you red Les Miserables by Victor Hugo? One of the main characters Marius follows a girl in a park for like 6 months, then he finds out where she lives and comes to just sit by her home before they finally meet And the girl is in love with him So Its normal and just our stupid generation makes it creepy
Parker Hill
If he could do that, he'd already done it. He can't just ignore his glaring issues because you tell him to.
Hunter Perry
>Yeah, book characters do it, so it's fine. I need to use fictional characters as my role models because my socialization skills are crap.
Hope you are just sending easy bait my way. Please tell me you are smart enough to not believe that.
Levi Murphy
What I am saying it is a normal reaction for a man to want to find out information about his crush before talking to her Or just to observe her in awe without actually talking
Christian Morris
Thanks. I'll try. I don't usually have trouble getting to meet people, it's just that she's making me feel like a teenager again (maybe due to the age difference?).
If she's not interested I'll move on, like I've always did when girls weren't interested.
She sat next to me and talked to this girl behind us, I just happened to listen to it because I have ears, and I was just sitting there at the time. What the fuck.
I get you. You're one of those "Leave m'lady for Chad masterrace" guys.
Never heard of it. I understand that's weird by today's standards, and to be honest, is quite far from what I did so far (basically nothing).
Zachary Jenkins
Using a book is not a good example man, and just because a lot of people do it doesn't make it less creepy.
Remember that in a book, the author decides who is attracted to whom before writing. IN real life, you need to actually engage with a person to see if they like you.
When someone invests time and energy in another person from afar, they bring with themselves an unreciprocated intensity that makes any interaction way tougher than it should be.
Believe it or not, girls can like guys, too. You don't need to work on making her like you by creeping information around her until you plan how to even talk to her for the first time. You can just interact with people and go out with those that you like AND also like you back.
Josiah Gonzalez
>I get you. You're one of those "Leave m'lady for Chad masterrace" guys.
Listen, you know you are being creepy. You've said it in the OP and in your first reply to me. You are asking for help because you know just saying "hi" won't cut it.
So cut the crap and don't try to lay the blame on me. If this was normal you'd just talk to her. Why do you need extra help for something so simple? You don't. You just need to find other maladjusted people to reinforce your creepy ass attitude.
You haven't told me why this stranger on the bus is just best shot yet. You know why you haven't replied. Have some self-reflection for a second.
Jaxon Johnson
>She has been sitting next to me every day she goes to college, on the way to and back. Quite uncommon for a girl. She either is looking forward for some crazy sex with you, I mean "madly craving for your juice"-like, or she sees you as the least potential harmful individual on the bus.
Hunter Murphy
Maybe he always has an available seat. Wonder why people don't sit next to him.
William Jackson
If she sits next to you every time then just point that out to her in some funny way as a way to start a conversation.
Luis Hughes
Yeah, I forgot to ask OP if the bus is always full, or if she could choose another spot.
Anyway , I would try some casual words first, like when she drops something (or you do), when the bus driver does something retarded, when something funny happens on board, etc... And see how the situation evolves. Don't try to have a complete conversation since first time, unless she tries to.
Logan Thompson
I can already imagine OP lying in wait for the perfect one liner while she is just wondering if he shat himself or something.
Dude, if you need to prepare then it's not spontaneous and natural.
Camden Gomez
>Dude, if you need to prepare then it's not spontaneous and natural. That's why I suggested *some casual words*. Something enough to show her he isn't a catatonic schizo, but not enough to creep her out.
Jackson Brown
>That's why I suggested *some casual words*.
How does that change the awkwardness of the whole thing?
If he could just talk to her, he would have and this thread wouldn't exist.
Thomas Bailey
>If he could just talk to her, he would have I don't believe that's the case. I believe he is waiting for some great idea to have a brilliant conversation like in romantic comedies. He still has to find out how she sees him first, as in
Andrew Moore
>I believe he is waiting for some great idea to have a brilliant conversation like in romantic comedies.
Exactly. So he is a maladjusted person that uses movies instead of real life to dictate his social interactions.
He has already built this up in his head, he lacks the skills to engage, and you are telling him to go for it anyway? Come on, you are trying to send him off to crash and burn.
He needs to develop relationships with people without the added load of expectation. He needs to try small talk without the added awkwardness of talking to a stranger on public transport.
You are telling him to fly before he can walk. That's too much. He needs to start small and build social skills in more social situations instead of this creepy mess.
Jason Foster
>You are telling him to fly before he can walk. So what do you advise him for? Letting her go and trying with some female friend? I don't know, he might die a virgin.
Jace Morales
>Letting her go and trying with some female friend?
How is this stranger a better option than someone that at least likes him as a friend, that at least enjoys his company?
I know, because there are no other options. That's the main issue here. He doesn't have female friends and doesn't engage in social activities where it's fine to approach a girl. That's why he needs to do it on the bus.
Until he deals with his social issues, dating is not an option. How can he keep a girl is he can't even make female friends?
Cooper Thomas
The bus is never full when she enters.
Always around 5 more seats around.
This has happened before with other girls. First one actually became my friend, but now she doesn't take the same bus anymore. Second one I struck some conversations with, she was even more awkward than me. Found out she had a jealous boyfriend and ghosted her. Third one I only spoke to once since she was really spacious and kind of crushed me in my window seat (kind of fat).
They all used to sit next to me constantly, if not always. I guess it's because I'm one of the quietest people in the bus most of the time.
Ryder Foster
>That's why he needs to do it on the bus. I'm not saying this isn't the point. What I'm saying is: at least he should try. Who cares if it doesn't work? What if she's a sperg just like him?
Thomas Bell
>Who cares if it doesn't work?
Do you know why people become bitter and join the Incel mindset? Why Jow Forums loves exchanging hate to justify their insecurity?
Because they get tired of bashing their heads on the walls. Because they expect an easy fix (she is a sperg too!) that never comes. Because their interactions with women are all negative, never realizing they set that up themselves by doing things that are super likely to fail time and time again.
He needs positive female interaction, not another failure to add to his books. Don't send him to fail, guide him to better prepare for next time.
Landon Wilson
Why do you only make friends on the bus? Don't you have any hobbies?
Angel Butler
I have. What I don't have is money to spend on those currently.
Xavier Johnson
>What I don't have is money to spend on those currently.
Dude, come on. Friends can hang out in the street and share a bottle of water. Why do you need money to just have some fun?
Save up for big nights out, and do smaller shit with people meanwhile.
Also, and this is such a huge problem I can't believe you haven't noticed it yet: If you can't even hang out with friends... HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO DATE?
Colton Diaz
I don't want to date necessarily, I just wanted to meet a person. Of course she probably already has a boyfriend, and family, and fun, but I just wanted to know I tried, whatever the result.
It's been a while since I met someone new. This semester has been rather slow and I haven't talked to people a lot. Most of my friends live far away, and we used to meet during class, but with the current crisis my country is going through, some only take a single class per semester or have dropped out completely. My scholarship forces me to go to college almost all week long, so I thought it would be nice to have at least someone I can talk to sometimes, in person.
Elijah Price
You don't know anything about her personality, you just want to bust your nut on her tits. What's in this for her?
Josiah Garcia
Holy fucking shit you're one negative fucking human being.
I don't know what's in it for her. It depends on her, not on me.
I will talk to her tomorrow and turn on my DGAF mode. Fuck this shit.
If she goes along, great. If she doesn't, I'll next her like she's a pedophile.
Done. Now let this thread die, you're making me angry at existence with your bitterness.
Asher Martinez
slip a single chicken nugget into her palm
Charles Mitchell
lol, dafuq does this even mean?
Nicholas Gonzalez
>you just want to bust your nut on her tits What is this assumption... I want her to walk with me, talk with me, kiss with me, share intimate information, emotions and all, engage in activities for two, and its not only sex Sex is like just showing me that I am attractive and you trust me but all I want is quality time really Its sad to think that when I would approach women they immediately think "he only wanna fuck". Well its true but this is just one tiny percent of many things I would do to a woman... (Im not op)
Ayden Martin
Fucking women on this board
Robert Thompson
Nah man. No man is capable of feelings. We all just want to cum and that's it. (sarcasm obviously)
This.
Joseph Russell
>doesn't even know he exists >sits next to him every day good logic.
