How do I break up with my pregnant gf?

How do I break up with my pregnant gf?
And is it the right thing to do?

Basically, this girl I dated for 3 months got pregnant. Before we ever had sex, I made sure to have the child discussion, and it seemed like we were both on the same page: that we don't want kids right now.
Anyway, I get her pregnant accidentally, and then she tells me she is going to carry it to term for moral reasons. I genuinely believe this is the irresponsible thing to do, given that we are a short term relationship, that we both don't want children, that we both don't have jobs and are in the middle of studying, that neither of us own a home for the baby. I mean, for god's sake, her plan is to bring up the child in her bedroom at her friend's house. This is insane to me, and I have spent the last few months trying to get her to at least consider other options, such as abortion or adoption.
Keep in mind that, even throughout my disagreement, I have been a solid emotional support for her, looked after her, and gone to baby classes with her. I felt bad for her and I wanted to be a good person.
But now, as the birth gets closer, I'm scared that she has got the wrong idea.

In all honesty, I don't think I could make this relationship work.

I'm guessing my choices are either to just rip off the bandaid and break up now, or stay and let the relationship slowly die until my gf doesn't respect me anymore and wants to breakup. This option still my give the wrong impression that I am committed to her though.

I also think that adoption, the modern kind where we are still involved in the child's life, would be the best for everyone. The child gets two sets of parents for support, gets parents that are actually excited to have children, that are in a strong long-term relationship (think 10+ years), that have careers, and have an actual home for the baby.

But I don't know if it's worth fighting for anymore if it will just make her hate me more.

Please help, I've never done a break up before.

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I've had a few close calls myself so I can understand your fear. You need to man up though. I'm not saying you have to make it work with girl, that could go either way. There's too many dead beat dads out there dude.

>you agree you don't want kids up front
>she goes back on this
Break up, that's fucked up. Shes a liar and cant be trusted. Unfortunately if you're biologically the father, you'll be tied to the kid whether you like it or not- if that happens at least try to be a half decent dad, even if you're not with the mom. I know you didn't want it, but it's so fucked for a kid to have a father who ignores them. But try to distance yourself from the mom, she seems like bad news. Poor kid

>I'm guessing my choices are either to just rip off the bandaid and break up now, or stay and let the relationship slowly die until my gf doesn't respect me anymore and wants to breakup.

this

you already know what to do
its not your kid
not your responsibility

don't fuck your life up over this

Break up, run away, run away.
Just say
"Okay, look, you've lied to me about the kid thing, this is a huge thing I cannot handle, my life would fall apart"
And I dunno, if you can't do that face to face, just do it via a phone or SMS, I know that's pretty rude, but fuck it, she has your life hanging over a threat, don't risk it, do anything to get away from here.

Too fucking bad, numbnuts. You planted the seed, now you get to tend the goddamn farm.

I mean wtf happened, the condom broke? She forgot to take her birth control?

Fuck the farm.

You sound like you're trying to be a responsible and reasonable adult.

You need to sit down and have a very very serious discussion with her. This is a very big decision that effects both of you and your child the rest of your lives.

Tell her you respect her opinion but are not feeling that you two have appropriate compatibility for this sort of thing. Heck, you've only been together 3 months, that's such a short time.

You need to be blunt and clear that you do not feel ready to be a father and that you do not think that raising a child without a secure financial situation is unethical and irresponsible. Tell her straight up that you have only been together 3 months and frankly are not at the point where you feel you are long-term. I know that sounds shitty, but honestly, if she's reasonable she will have realized this herself.

In the end it's her final say, but you should at least try to give her a solid idea on what she's signing up for, and how you might not want to stick around.

Be sure to bring up all the options, like adoption.

>You need to be blunt and clear that you do not feel ready to be a father and that you do not think that raising a child without a secure financial situation is unethical and irresponsible.

*You need to be blunt and clear that you do not feel ready to be a father and that you do not think that raising a child without a secure financial situation is ethical or responsible.

fix'd, gomen.

>its not your kid
>not your responsibility

What? OP sounds certain it is. Are you some kind of cunt or something?

shove her down the stairs, that should fix your problem.

>its not your kid
that's where you're wrong, it's his kid
you were both stupid to not use contraception
her wanting to keep the child might not seem fait to you, and you having to pay for it is not, but since it's also your mistake, you'll just have to deal with it
feel free to leave her, but you're either going to have to pay or she's giving it up for adoption, which is fine, but I'd advice against he modern type you described

try to talk with her about adoption. tell her that you don't think it's right for the kid to be raised in a single parent environment / environment with 2 people who barely know each other. that's really your best bet.

Go fuck yourself. Raise your kid and be a man. Who the hell gave you the right to go fuck someone and not bare the responsibility of rasiing that kid. If you don't raise that kid your a piece of shit bottom line. It's not about what the hell u want or her it's your about your fucking kid now who had no damn say it anyways. He probably didn't want an ass wipe like you for a dad but if you leave that kid will grow up and come back to kill you one day. Go suck a nut you fucking bitch

I dunno what movies you watch but they are crazy, I doubt his kid would kill him you melodramatic fuck.
Sometimes you fuck and condom breaks or something, I don't fucking know, accidents literally happen.
And I think you forgot to read the part from the OP where he said that he is not exactly rich; and that isn't good for a child, so if anything, it is responsible to put the child to adoption, THAT'S WHY THAT FUCKING SYSTEM EXISTS IN THE FIRST PLACE, FOR SITUATION LIKE THESE.
Or abortion.

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Tell that women to give the kid up for adoption. It's no life for any of you including the kid, to put yourself through so much trouble. Everyones life, yours, your girlfriend's, your kids life, they all will suffer because you are not even in a remotely stable environment to raise a kid. If either of you stop studying to support the kid, you'd probably resent it for "having taken away the chance to study", and you will very like go there if you don't have a very good relationship with either sides parents to take care of the kid.

There is a high chance that a kid that grows up in an unstable environment where it doesn't feel wanted or loved or feels resented by his parents, will surely end up with some neurosis.
If you want to definitely secure the possibility for everyone's future to flourish, you give the kid up for adoption and if you get the chance to get him back and say "sorry i fucked up" you should do it.

Not being born is a wonderful gift in most cases, abortion is better for moral reasons, compared to raising a child you don't like. (Imagine how damaging that is)

True, for example, me, I wish I was fucking aborted.

Ghost her ass. Deny everything, shes trying to scam you.

seconded

Yeah, good luck with that, they can prove he's the real father, lying won't do you good here.

Fine, but at least make it as difficult as possible for her. She is an evil person, she must pay for her sins and her tender unborn child.

No need point in being bitter, what the user needs to be focusing on is staying safe, just make sure the kid gets adopted and then just leave the girl forever. Making her life hard won't help anyone.

>Anyway, I get her pregnant accidentally,
Well you're fucked my dude. If you break up with her she's going to keep the baby and you're going to be legally required to pay for it or go to jail. Hope the five minutes was worth the next 18 years of your life.