How do I know if I'm actually asexual, or if I simply don't trust women due to past experience?

Some people experience arousal with a dissociation of themselves and the subject.

As in, they're fine watching people get it on and can jerk off to that, but the idea of those things happening to THEM is repulsive.

Again, it's one of those umbrella terms so that obviously doesn't apply to every asexual.

Oh, I think I feel that actually.

But again, that could just be my reluctance to ever truly trust a woman.

Are those only options?

what do you mean?

I'm exclusively paraphilic, something I go to therapy for, I don't feel attracted to things that can feel attracted to me. I still masturbate and watch porn, regular porn. I watch both straight and gay porn as my focus is completely on the act and not on the people as they disgust me.

being asexual is a tumblr meme. It's for people who were either severely molested when they were kids or they just have impossibly low t-levels

you're retarded lol

okay well that's probably rude actually

If you're a man, have you ever had sexual urges at all? Have you ever had an erection? Have you ever masturbated?

If your answer to any of these questions is yes, you're not asexual. If you need a label for yourself (which I discourage people from doing), you might call yourself demisexual.

>I'm ace, I masturbate, and I have a sexual relationship with my significant other. I'm not a sexual person, not really interested in it, but my partner enjoys it so I do it for them. This is really common with asexuals.
You aren't asexual. You just don't enjoy sex.

>Some people experience arousal with a dissociation of themselves and the subject.
>I'm exclusively paraphilic

This is simply the result of mental illness, probably childhood sexual abuse, maybe some physical illness with cerebral manifestations. Maybe some therapists call it "asexuality" to make it seem less daunting, maybe to give the patient a way of accepting their condition since, so long as it's not resulting in harmful behavior to the patient or others, if the patient himself accepts it, it's arguably no longer mental illness.

Cf. how sexual reassignment may cure a transgender patient of gender dysmorphia; so long as they're not engaged in self-injurious behavior and can participate in society normally, it's not exactly an illness, even if it is abnormal.

Same deal with asexuality; if the patient accepts this and learns to live without causing self-harm by, say, exploring different methods of stimulation just to see if they can feel it, it's hardly an illness.

After all, lifelong celibacy itself isn't considered a mental illness.

As the paraphilic, the problem with paraphilias is that they can be a illegal to practice and different methods of stimulations can not always be there or inadequate. It's celibacy forced by society and that's difficult to accept.

This isn't accurate. Your body can have erections even without actual sexual desire (morning wood, for example, and you'll usually have erections multiple times per night). Asexual people can also masturbate or have hormonal moments.

The key difference is that they experience no sexual attraction to other people. They never go "I would tap that". They can and sometimes do masturbate, they just don't want to involve other people in the equation. But asexual people also can and do involve partners because it's "what's right" or "to satisfy them" or even because they want the intimacy, even if not the sex itself. Sometimes you eat a salad with your dinner because it's healthy and what you "should do", and not because you like or want it.

Demisexuals, on the other hand, only experience sexual desire to other people after they have formed a strong bond with the person, e.g. a lasting friendship, and only with those specific people.

The only way to be truly asexual is if you have something wrong with your brain chemistry. There are no true asexual people. Just people with messed up brains and people that are lying to themselves to cover something up.

sorry you're right but you were rude first

I am asexual, I don't experience sexual attraction.

Demisexuality isn't a thing. It's not an orientation, it doesn't speak of what someone is attracted to, just the frequency in which they experience said attraction.

I became fully asexual after starting SSRIs at 20yo. Only had one or two unrequited crushes as a teen. I'ts been a decade since, is it safe to say I'm asexual?

That is merely a side effect of the SSRI antidepressants. You are not truly asexual. Since you have been on them for a decade it would take a while for them to be fully out of your system and there may be lasting damage, but given enough time your libido would return.

But I didn't have much of a libido as a teen, barely knew what sex and masturbation were.

You might just have low testosterone then. I don't know enough about you to say for certain. If you don't mind being asexual then just stay the way you are. If you want to change things then start by seeing your doctor.

that's not being asexual, that's being so warped by porn and low self esteem that you literally can't picture yourself involved as a sexual participant, only a viewer. this society is sexually dysfunctional enough without dipshit *~eVeRyBoDy's kWeEr+* theorists turning problems into pride flags, fuck off.

Are you the same poster as ?

You don't know

I'm content with my situation, and will likely have to take SSRIs the rest of my life.

Does low-T also apply to females?

Apparently kek.