My girlfriend breaks up with me

>how to make it a good idea

I don't think that's possible. A lot goes into making a marriage work, and starting off with it being based on pissing off someone else is not one of those things.

Sorry, that's not what I'm looking for. It's a revenge is a best dish served cold ordeal. The ideal is getting the best prospects out of revenge.

good idea op

What exactly do you want revenge for? Your hurt feelings? Was your ex supposed to stay with you forever whether she wanted to or not just to avoid upsetting you?

Ok, there's a lot at play beyond revenge in going off on a limb to say fuck you.im going to be doing this to replace my ex with someone who would likely have similar values based on the same cultural background. I would never marry without a prenup wrote up.

We were going to marry. She got cold feet.

Thx, user. Got any advice for Mr.OP

Op, here. I'm going to try and get things that you anons might be hung up on out of the way.
>revenge is a product of finding a new flame not directly but indirectly
>this is plan laid out several months in advance I see little impulse in this unless I wing it
>I'm looking for love from someone from a similar background not revenge
>let's forget I said revenge
>I need advice on how to make a romantic connection overseas if being foreign in a foreign place matters
Thx

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That's even worse. How little regard do you have for other people that you think it's ok to use someone like that?

Better now than afterwards. Move on.

Getting dumped sucks, and it's easy to fall into revenge fantasies, but in your case it sounds like there's really nothing to get revenge for. Take some time, cool your jets, and just get on with your life mate.

Wot? I'm lost in wot you mean. Who would be exploited? My ex?
I can cool my keys that's the plan. To do this having planned it out would be the plan. I'm going to travel to her country take my pick with her to see so she can judge it with her own eyes. What she feels at that point is not of my concern?

>Who would be exploited

The person you haven't met but already intend to marry to spite your ex of course.

Op, here this whole thread has been
>that's not nice
>that's not good
This is not advice. I didn't ask "i need advice on if this is good or if this is nice"

I feel exploit is subjective here not objective

Does that magically make it not exploitation? Of course not.

Your plan sucks because it won't make you happy either user. If you want to be a dumb cunt you'll have to figure it out yourself.

Op, here once again.
I feel like I need to put context or awnser questions to get the insight I truly desire. I'm not sure how to contextualize this exactly. I desire to find a romantic partner with similar values to my ex. I will be taking a trip with my ex in the next year to her homeland. I am sure I'm wanting to find a partner and move on if we don't get back together. I can use this trip to my advantage and find a new love. I am unsure how this is all bad and not a good idea?

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>Person A doesn't feel exploited
>Person B doesn't exploit
>explain how you can say that given this
>pro tip you cant

I see confirmation bias I believe. I believe you see the words "bad" and "not nice" and this creates a bias in your response.

Except person B does exploit - that's exactly your shitty plan.

Nice armchair psych but none of those words are in your OP and I've been telling you it's a shit idea since then.

>my girlfriend breaks up with me
>says she needs to change herself and I need to make some changes
She is either giving you false hope or putting you on the back burner, you don't improve your situation by breaking up.

If you have to live together start making plans to live on your own, if she goes abroad tell her of your plans and leave while she is away.
Marrying someone else to spite her is a fucking stupid idea, you won't be getting back at her, she won't care and it will prove to her that she could do better than a reactionary man child.

The best way to get revenge is to live your life, she is staying your friend to make living together easier, move out and cut contact, block her on social media and do your own thing, if she is willing to break up with you while living together, she will lose nothing by you doing anything to try and spite her.
The relationship is fucked, don't meet her parents, don't try to meet someone else to spite her, don't bother with her.

>We were going to marry. She got cold feet.
You weren't even engaged, she can't get cold feet when you're not even engaged nor do you have a date planned.

>Not exploiting someone equates to exploiting someone
is coming out of a relationship and looking for someone at the upcoming dance and then finding someone bad. Then having came out of a relationship prior to meeting this someone is exploiting this person.

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The plan was i had to meet her parents then immediately get engaged.

How is tricking someone into marrying you to spite your ex not exploiting them?

Sounds like a healthy relationship OP.
She set her own rules and realised she didn't want you when the time arrived.

I made changes to myself to help better the relationship while together. I proposed we seek professional counseling individually and together to strengthen our relationship. I aligned my values with hers. She refused to make changes while together. Only now does she say she wants change and i don't believe that is something done solo.

We have broken up prior 4x b4 and she'll see that I'm living my life and doing the best I can and she'll see that and try to make up. She'll say the problem resolved itself but I'm looking back and thinking each time we got back together we needed counseling services just to get back to square 1. This is hard to deal with having been an on and off again long term relationship. I'm seeing a counselor now. I convinced her to see a psychologist when she never would trying in the past to get her to go as an individual or together.
Sorry long captcha

What are you perceiving as a trick? It's not about revenge like I posted originally now. It's more about moving on.

Op, here again.
Thx, for your input anons. I've done some venting through this thread and have been critical of criticism. Sorry, this break up has been hard and I don't tell people about it.

Kick her ass out and all her belongings. You’ll see her true colours then. She broke up with you to remove the guilt of cheating.

>it's not about what I said it's about - it's about something actually reasonable

Bullshit.

It's not fun dealing with the rollercoaster emotions of having to live with your ex, user. My apologies

I live with her until I'm kicked out. I haven't cheated. I'm certain she hasn't cheated. I'm going to pretend like she cheated.

Sorry, I'm not going to pretend like she cheated?

It's certainly not - I've been there too. Sorry for being a bit of a cunt mate. I do genuinely believe it's in your best interests to keep the revenge fantasies as just fantasies though. You'll meet someone else to settle down with before too long, and your ex may or may not be satisfyingly pissed off (my last one was hilariously upset when I got engaged, despite being a serial cheater), but if your focus is on making yourself feel good instead of making your ex feel shit I think things will go better for you.

I see. Having taken this relationship with serious sincerity and honesty unlike past relationships I have been burned. It's hard to not feel jaded at times. I need to put together my life. I would sincerely like to find someone who would be from her country or some other foreign chick. Sorry about being a dick. This thread is still alive. I'm looking for a bit of pointers and guidance. When can I start looking for a new lover? Should I consider that my ex wants to get back together In the future since she has said she would? I feel like she is playing a game or putting me through a test when she breaks up with me and when I couldn't care less she runs back to me.

Dude, sounds like she was tired of the dick. Just split and get a new girl. There's plenty of other fish. Don't be a pussy with this weird "soul mate" shit. Doesn't exist. Just accept it.