My girlfriend has recently started a new job, she's in the gruelling training process, and it's just making her implode

My girlfriend has recently started a new job, she's in the gruelling training process, and it's just making her implode.

We're not in the same place, she has to wake at 5:30 am and doesn't finish until around 10pm, we barely get to talk for 10 minutes on the phone, and she is struggling to keep up with her colleagues.

And she is so negative about herself, she tells me she must be low IQ and everyone else is better. I tell her to be more confident in herself and stop putting herself down, and how this attitude serves no benefit, but she gets very frustrated at me, as if she wants me to just say "yea you're fucking dumb". Actually she is very smart, she won her place at this job through a competition and interview process against 20,000 other people. But she just won't see it.

I understand how hard it all is for her, but the issue is she is suddenly out of nowhere talking about all these problems between me and her. She's saying how it feels like we hardly talk (yes, we don't, but she's only on day 4), how distant it feels, how she feels like she's falling out of love with me.

It's like she's taking the job frustration out on the relationship or something. And it makes me worry, obviously it's extremely demanding for her, but she really just cannot handle stress or distance. How will we manage in the future. And i fear she will quit this job, but she needs it, its very good pay and is great for future career prospects.

How do you deal with someone acting like this? How do i comfort her, and convince her she isn't retarded without making her frustrated. I know she just wants to vent and be listened to but i can't stand herself putting herself down like that.

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Wjat kind of job has such gruesome hours yet is good for career prospects.

A workplace that doesn't make you feel comfortable is not worth the salary, no matter if you win a million dollars a month, but that is my opinion.

You need to break up with her. Too many negatives to justify the effort. She clearly has anxiety (maybe a disorder) and she is abusing you emotionally because of her own individual stresses. People like this take a long time to see the error in their attitude. My wife is this way and it's making me question our marriage.

It's china
I don't know its all fine until she gets super stressed

You are willing to do the following?

1. Date someone in China (LDR?)
2. Hardly talk
3. Never see each other in REAL LIFE
4. Never get fucks
5. When you do talk, it's mostly her using you as an emotional punching bag?

Why are you doing this? Meet someone physically close to you at a minimum.

Well she is Chinese. She is conditioned to be a mindless drone. I'm sure will adapt to the schedule soon.

I am also in China, though not Chinese, she has gone to another city for this job, I can eventually move but not until my contract ends.

We have been together for two years, made future plans, this job is part of it. Maybe she will calm down, she's only a few days in and its probably just a giant shock to her.
Well I think part of the reason she is struggling is because she's much less of a mindless drone than the other trainees, she has a much more western outlook to life, work and free time.

Help her, don't be a brainlet cuck now.

She started 4 days ago, she'll eventually get over it. Be a little more assertive and tell her she needs to suck it up and work hard. However, be there for her when she wants to vent.

You strike me as a very shallow individual. You place far too much importance on how much it pays and how it will leas to better opportunities. Fuck all of that noise.
She’s miserable and she needs to find a career doing something that she loves, not what pays well, thats not a life worth living.

I know you came here wanting some quick fix to make her shut up and love her shitty job, but you have this backwards. Im telling you that you need to support her to find her passions in life.

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It's her idea as much as mine, I'm not forcing her into this job, it wasn't even my idea. But career is important, the plan is to just do this job for about 3 years and then we can move to the west and she will have the experience to get a much nicer job with free time and decent pay. This is reality to an extent, if we all followed our passions most of us would be earning pennies and living a shit life. We both come from backgrounds of constant financial worry and uncertainty, we don't want that, we want stability and economic freedom.

I see that you really believe in this. But at what price does that financial security come?

The hard truth is that there are ways to cope with most hardships in life, but they require time. If you do not have time to cope, then burnout ensues.

I wish you well, and hope you and the lady find happiness.

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Fuck man. China is a shit hole you cant really complain

3 years is too long for a shit job like this. This isn’t the end-all be all of jobs, is it?

Well this is the training, but yes its a very good job for China with a very good company. Even in the training her pay is equal to a good job in the west at about $30,000 salary.

$30,000 is significantly below median income in the US, borderline poverty level.

No, that's household income, not single person. Besides, for China its a fortune and for Europe its a good salary too, considering this is a straight out of university job.

lolollo grueling hours for only 30k.
tell her to find a new job

You have no idea how the world works. $30,000 in China has much more purchasing power than in the USA.

All other jobs pay less.

Like graduating in America and then working in a coffee shop?