Why women become rude after friendzoning you?

Hello Jow Forums

I've been actively searching for women to date, and of course I've been rejected every now and then and it's Ok, I've accepted it as part of the "game."

The thing is, I've started to notice a pattern here... where women reject me nicely and tell me to be "just friends."
Yes I get disappointed but I'll get over it.

I've absolutely no problem remaining friends if they don't wish to go out with me, but I've noticed that EVERY SINGLE GIRL that friendzones me starts to act very rude towards me later down the line.

I don't actively pursue the girls anymore, yet they stop acting nice towards me and when talking to them they just ignore me, or give me one word answers.

It really puzzles me, because I don't understand this behavior from women.

I mean.. what's wrong with just talking for a few minutes? It's not like I'm asking you out again or anything like that, you wanted to be friends right?

Can someone please explain me what the fuck is going on? I don't get this and it keeps happening to me.

It really confuses me a lot and makes me less trustful of women. I just can't take their "let's just be friends" seriously anymore if this keeps happening!

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Do they start acting rude when you get a girlfriend?

No, they stop acting like decent human beings after just rejecting me.

I don't really get it tho, it's like they suddenly go all bitch mode on me.

I don't get butthurt and when they reject me I really act cool about it "Damn! Well I had to try!"

they usually take it well, but a after a while they decide to act rude or give me one word answers. Like if they were mad at me for talking to them, or like if I where not "deserving" of their attention anymore.

I don't know man... it really drives me crazy.

These girls dont even deserve you as a friend lmao.
Pro tip: dont become friends with girls, youre just reinforcing their ego.

They don't really mean it when they say, "let's just be friends." They're just being nice to you and don't want to hurt your feelings. When they start acting rude, it's because you can't catch the hint and just go away.

They probably think you're still pursuing and react that way to discourage you. There are a lot of guys out there incapable of taking rejection as a definite no and persist, so a lot of women do this because you just night be one of thise guys. Its a defence mechanism.

They established power over you with the rejection.

Yeah that's what I thought

But I still don't get it tho... when a girl hits me up and I'm not interested, I don't really act like an asshole to her or anything.

I mean I don't lead her on but there's no need to be rude to her.

That's why I wrote this question, because there's no need to be rude in this situation.

Just makes me think that most women are like this when it comes to friendzoning guys.

A lot of women look at guys as you are either my boyfriend/prospective boyfriend or you are shut to me

And then they complain that men are assholes and just interested in sex, but they can't be bothered to act like a decent human being when the guy is rejected and he is just being polite.

Oh the irony!

Don't take it personally. There's hundreds of other guys just like you that bother a girl on a daily basis. It's a completely different level compared to a guy just being nice to a girl he rejected.

As a woman, I will be completely honest: if I do not act like I am completely repulsed by or hate a guy, people will start shit. Rumours. Or just straight out try to push us together for no reason. On top of that, there are a lot of guys that assume being nice to them means you want to be their partner. You seem to be one of those, since in your first post you mentioned being rejected as "part of the game". There is no game. She said no, she is getting hostile because her world is bigger than your feelings about her behaviour toward you and there is always another layer underneath that makes "just being nice" more complicated than need be.

OP here.

I actually ask them out and if they say no I have no qualms.

That's why I said it's part of the "game," it's just bound to happen when trying to date people, I know some girls just might not be interested.

That doesn't mean I don't wish to continue being friendly towards them, yet they decide to be very disrespectful when I've always been polite and friendly.

I won't think she's wanting to be my lover just because we have a friendly conversation.

But I guess you have a point, probably some guys will keep trying and being friendly would encourage them, so I guess that when a woman acts rude towards me after rejecting me she just wants to be left alone and not even be my friend.

I guess this is how it works then, so guys can't really be friends of women who reject them it seems.

Yeah, you just don`t know when to stop. Which is exactly when you`re being rejected. Also the “friendzone“ doesnt exist, you`re just being rejected politely, but you seem to keep going until th gurl has to make really clear shes not interested. Creepy.

OP here.

Where I'm from people are very social, we can talk with strangers in the street like nothing, so what you find creepy might be very normal to me.

I find nothing wrong with wanting to be friends with women, even if you're rejected.

Point still stands. Why would you want to be friends with them? Normally only guys who hope to bang her long-teem despite rejection strive for that. Just move on like, a normal person. You can be social around them, but not friends.

So I'm not normal because I want to be friends with people?

You're probably the one who isn't very normal, why wouldn't you want to be friends with women?

I have plenty of friends I've met who I tried to bang at first.

All the women that have friend zoned me ( actual friend zoned not this bullshit tinder rejection) have been friendly towards me or developed into real lasting friendships.

The let's be friends line is a popular way for women to let you down easy. I can't tell if you've had a friendly relationship with them prior to you asking them out but if not maybe they think you're just trying a different angle on them?

Regardless, I'm sorry you have had a bad experience.

>So I'm not normal because I want to be friends with people?
You are not normal because you want to be friends with people who don't share the feeling
A normal person would notice this immediatly and cut contact with the "failed attempt"

Friends always feeling minor attraction to each other. You just can't bond with other person without it. That's why male-female friendship is almost not exist - relationship will progress to love or dissappear.
Tldr: woman become rude to you, when you annoying them. And not everybody want to be your friend, which is why friendship is rare and precious

I'm glad some women like you have that self awareness, granted it wouldn't necessarily be the best option to take. How does it feel knowing that you're despicable trash for placing superficial values and expectations on other human beings?

Honestly OP I think it might be a case of misunderstanding intent.

A lot of the time guys think women are flirting with them because they're "nice". This is essentially just how women are taught to interact with one another, and how men are taught to interact with other men.

What men perceive as "nice" women see as "normal". However, this perception can change once a man makes it known he's romantically interested.

A woman might shift how she interacts, not because she wants to be mean, but because she wants to adjust and avoid "leading you on". It can be confusing, because a lot of the time I see women being just normal/nice to guys, like they would any of their friends, and yet they're accused of being teases.

I think, if you really want to be friends, you should try asking them directly about it. Dont' be rude or anything, just say something like,

"Hey, I noticed you've been acting a little differently around me lately. I just want to reiterate, I really do want to be friends, and I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but I Can't help but feel like you're angry or dislike me now?"

If they really want to be friends, they should be fine with shifting how they behave around you, and vice versa.

I know this sort of thing is tough to understand when you're on the spectrum, but when a girl says "Lets just be friends", she's just trying to reject you in the nicest way she can. She has no actual interest in being your friend.

Passive aggression and the cancer of people born post-1995

Here's the women's perspective
>(to her friend) "Yeah user is SO into me, but I hope that loser doesn't bother me anymore"
>(user is not giving a fuck) "Now he's playing cool, but I know that he is SO into me, because I'm such a premium bitch"
>(user is actually not giving a fuck and just being nice) "I can't stand this loser. Why isn't he running after ME? I'M the GREAT PRINCESS, he is supposed to be after ME because I'M SOOO GREAT"
>(anonette proceeds to feel bitchy because the one she labeled loser is basically rejecting her by showing her that he doesn't feel shit for her. she has no control over him(!))

tl;dr: they label you 'nice guy loser', by showing them that you are not, you are insulting their ego and show them they have no control over you. by being bitchy they try to establish control over you.