My gf just told me she's a cam girl

been serious with gf for 6mths. dated a bit before. in college and part time she told me show worked in IT so I assumed image related. when I asked about work she'd say 'its boring' or give some non-descript conversation with a co worker.

out with friends last night some started hinting at her 'secret' I'm like wtf.

she spilts us away from the group and tells me shes a camgirl. only ever solo, and just till she graduates.

completely lost. what do I do?

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What's her cam name? I could use a good fap.

Dump her. You have to leave her and move on. The end game of every relationship should be marriage and a family. Could you imagine a girl like that raising children? Dude, she's a prostitute. She gets other guys off for money. I can't believe you don't know what to do, the answer is so obvious

How do you feel about it? Would you still have gf'd her up if you knew she was a cam girl?

If you do care, why? And I'm not being snarky, it's worthwhile to understand your own objection to it. The answer to that question will tell you what to do.

Some people won't give a shit and some people will. Decide which type you are and then act accordingly.

i dont know - she didnt say 'im a cam girl - saucy 23 so send me tokens and you can fap to me'

im not sure i agree with the entirety of your statement, but i do agree that im not sure i can be long term with someone who has lied to me. but in truth im gutted i thought we were something.

i feel gutted. probably not, i dunno maybe if i knew then i couldnt object after. i think its being mislead, but id be lying if she said 'i know you thought i was in IT but actually im a nurse' would have had the same effect

i dont want to throw something good away recklessly. but this has sent me sideways

Not op but yes I could. People can change and/or people aren't defined by their jobs. We let people who killed people and are clearly mentally traumatized by it raise children.

So could you ask her, please? Maybe I could take her private and I could roleplay as you and pretend to be fucking her. It'd be so meta.

here. I don't know a lot about your relationship, but it sounds like you aren't the sort who can easily put it behind you so it doesn't seem reasonable for you to stay in it.

If it were me, I'd probably keep banging until a better option appeared.

What part of my statement don't you agree with? So if the point of a relationship isn't eventually long term, marriage and a family, why even have one? Why not just get prostitutes? You pay for it one way or another. I mean your gf obviously has no self respect. How could you date someone like that? How stupid are you?

>My gf just told me she's a cam girl

nothing good can come from a camwhore and you need to run for the hills op. also they have terrible personalities and feel entitle to male resources.

youtube.com/watch?v=-VuujVkdUuA

I didn't say people with horrible lapses in judgement can't raise children. But those lapses in judgement are indicative of a larger problem in general and in their way of thinking.

I think you're right that people can change and we have to believe in forgiveness. But if I were OP I'd have a serious talk with this girl about quitting. I personally would dump her because that's too much baggage and crap to deal with and she probably isn't going to change. If she really loved him she would have quit immediately. The fact she hasn't quit and found honest work shows she doesn't really care that much about him

Also people who have murdered or raped or been drug addicts are always horrible children, run away parents who leave a single mother/ father and the child in a broken home.

Shows how little she values herself.
Could you imagine her being the mother of your children? Probably not.

yeah it'll be high on my list of questions if/when we next speak..

no i agree, i dont like being fucked around and this feels pretty shitty. good call on the banging - i should think about that. worry is i live in a small place so until im known to be 'free' i'll struggle to meet someone else

i dont agree all relationships should lead to marriage. and i think its clear we arent going to find middle ground where we can have a discussion.

its interesting a lot of the response has been about the job itself. i dont disagree although I think im more bothered about the lying but yeah i see your point

she'd be better off with someone who it didn't bother, and you'd be better of with someone who has values closer to your own. breakup would be mutually beneficial.

Forget all the moral bullshit everyone's arguing over. She lied to you over something major. She lied because she KNEW you wouldn't be comfortable with it.

This is not forgivable. Dump her.

While I personally don't think there's anything wrong with camming for cash, the fact that you're in an exclusive relationship and you're just now hearing about this is inappropriate.

She should have disclosed this with you before you got together officially. Normally something like this isn't anyone's business, but I do consider it something your boyfriend/girlfriend should be aware of.

I would confront her. Don't be accusatory, chances are she wasn't keeping it from you for malicious reasons--she could just have different views and perhaps it didn't cross her mind to bring it up sooner.

Let her know how you feel, about how this isn't something you should keep secret because it kind of insinuates she is choosing to be dishonest with you.

If you're not comfortable dating someone who wants to do this, or if she isn't interested in stopping, it's probably best to part ways before it gets too serious.

>She didn't know teehee

This is such bullshit. She directly lied about her job when asked. She concealed it because she knows not all men like dating whores.

she'd be better with someone it didnt bother that they were lied to? or that she cammed? but i agree this isnt going anywhere

i think thats true. she said she planned to tell me but wanted to find a time, and that time never came.

yes your spot on.


for anyone interested im increasingsly decided its the lying thats the issue. i should have had a choice to decide if the camming would bother me or not. as it is now i cant 'impartially' decide cos its so linked to the lie.

Sweet. Could you text her right now, please? Prospective customer and all.

She's in full damage control mode and is giving you lies about "planning to tell you". She never would've told you the truth. This sort of thing needs to come up at the beginning of a relationship, and she knows that.

just got off the phone with her...damn it slipped my mind.

yep. absolutely. she's been texting all day and I just answered her 4/5th call. she's crying and saying she wish she'd told me from the start and can we get together and talk. I said I wasn't sure that was a good idea at the moment

then she starting wailing 'you're going to leave me aren't you, please don't, we can work it out'

I told her if she didn't calm down i'd cut the call - and amazingly she instantly did.

we're done. I guess its a lucky escape, I'm gutted but I'm not 'smart' enough to remain cool and stay with her for sex - I m just done

thanks everyone I appreciate it (even the wierdos...)

I wouldn't want to stick my dick in a revolting liar again, either

and ur welcome user

OP - latest update. her friend has just called me to tell me I'm disgusting for not listening to my ex explain herself and how I shouldn't judge people for their choices.

jesus. some girls are crazy. ive never experienced anything like this.

Yeah, that's not appropriate.

It might be a good idea to reiterate you aren't judging her choice to be a cam girl, you're judging her choice to lie to you about it.

college prostitution. liberal colleges are degenerate because they’re high school 2.0 where people go to “have an experience”. our culture is in some ways going morally up and in other ways going morally down, and such is life.

Please tell me you rekt her too.

Ok, call her back then. I've been edging this whole time so I really need her help.

Idk, I feel like I wouldn't be too upset. If you've been on any cam website, it's pretty fucking boring imo. Those girls don't seem like they're into it, and it kind of kills the mood because you want that "chase". I'd only be personally upset if she was talking to specific fans and developed an interest in them, if she's bringing other guys on there to fuck in front of the camera, or if she was using a huge dildo to fuck herself while I have a boring average dick.

I may have reiterated in quite a strong way, yeah
see above!
hahahaha you are funny
I don't know she said it was just her. she said she dragged out getting naked for as long as poss and then would masterbate using toys. in fact that's also just weirded me out she might have used 'our' toys to play on the internet?!

fuck this is mad..

People change only for the worse tho

Move on. For fucks sakes. Who in their right mind would upload naked videos/pictures of themselves or star in porn? Broken and damaged people.

She is a broken person. Run away and don't look back, unless you want to turn into a pillar of salt.

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>told you she worked in IT
>pulls you aside one day and says shes a camgirl

Sounds like she lied to you.

I reccomend dumping her. But i must admit thats easier said than done. Still its probably your best bet because why would you want to be with someone who isnt honest with you. She gets a taste of deceiving you and then she uses that as reference material for other deceptions. If a girl doesnt feel comfortable sharing that with you anyway i doubt it can be a good relationship. Relations are meant to be fun and lighthearted not a constant serious game where its like you have to impress each other

I dunno if that's true, but I'm not risking it in this case.

we're done. it's over ive texted her to ask she doesnt call me again.

good advice. followed and i hadnt thought about your last point. its super relevant so thank you

>we're done. it's over ive texted her to ask she doesnt call me again.

Good lad. Sorry you had to deal with that. Hope you're feeling better soon!

Good job OP.

This is best for both of you, hopefully she will use this experience as a lesson and change/grow into a better person

>All these degenerates ITT saying there's nothing wrong with being a literal whore

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I'm not trying to be funny. I need her name and sauce. She's obviously going to be single soon so let an user fap to her. Fucking fuck.

Good man, it was the right thing to do.

Even the lie, man.
But the lie about spreading her twat for other men online is a pretty clear indication to what kind of value you represent to her.

It was more convenient for her to lie, remember. Does it stop here, or is this just the beginning? Not to totally gaslight but you have to consider their personalities.

Pls post her cam name, i wouldnt mind fapping to your gf

He's not going to give it to us since he's a little bitch.

Why don't you sad desperate fucks look up literally any camgirl?

Is your life this devoid of meaning?

Because I want this one in particular since I could post about it later just for OP

Right, so we're going with "this devoid of meaning."
OP has probably already left his thread, besides.

You might not have to stalk Jow Forums for camgirl names if you held yourself to just a slightly higher standard...

Friend, I know there are plenty of camgirls available. But this one was going to be special. Soc is full of those dumb bitches, trust me.

>special
You just keep proving how empty of... anything your life is.

I think the only special one here is you, guy. Might wanna get a helmet on for the next post.

>her friend has just called me to tell me I'm disgusting for not listening to my ex explain herself and how I shouldn't judge people for their choices.
>how I shouldn't judge people for their choices.
And people wonder why I hate proponents of this """ideology"""... This is the end result of refusing to judge people.

My brain is quite alright. Thank you for your concern, though. How often would you get to engage with a camgirl and tell her all about the thread her ex made about her being a cam girl? It would be fantastic.

>refusing to judge people
You know for once I both agree with you and am deeply curious with what you see in that error.

I think the greatest weakness it's caused us is that nobody gets fired or punished anymore. Even kids get off scot-free with actual violence just because. People can steal from companies and get away with it as long as they're not doing it directly in front of someone. We even turn a blind eye to actual crimes because blacks or Latinos commit them and we wouldn't want to "be racist."

What do you think of or call to mind when you say we are in the wrong for refusing to judge? Excepting, obviously, poor suckers like OP trusting in peoples' good faith. Poor guy.

Get over it. Be glad you've got a girl hot enough to sell her body who's just doing it over the internet to make ends meet and stop being such a self-conscious little manbaby.

I've tried being one for a week and I might get back into it in a couple months
Welp at least she told you, wich means she values honesty in the relationship but couldn't quit before because of moneyz
If she was like "sorry I didnt tell you before" or somehow apologetic or shy about it I would be ok with it
If she was like "you're being so close minded!" or agressive-defensive about it yeah it would be a red flag

What's wrong with being a whore? I mean once you get past your serial killer in the making obsession with sexual promiscuity, what is objectively wrong with prostitution?

>she told me show worked in "IT"
>Is a camwhore
Fucking excellent. I've gotta remember that one.

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You are disgusting? For not showing your cooch to the entire internet and then lie about it for the entirety of the relationship about it?

Women .... You did well, I'm sorry you had to go through this. I hope you'll find something better in the future.

im not going to give it to anyone. partly because i dont know it.
i litterally wouldnt care, your shrivled cock coming over her is no different to any other is it. for all we know you have so...

I popped back because I thought people might like an update, I wasn't expecting some people to be so sad.
physically she was delightful. of course we know mentally she was a cunt. but if it helps you know...she was fucking awesome in bed and thus not only will you never knowingly fap to her but also never knowingly fuck her either

tottally over it. if you're ok being with lying bitches, then you do it - its not for me.

update for those who care: she came over, my house mate had the good sense to film her acting out at the door and refusing to leave. we called the police. she certainly wont be caming tonight as she's currently in cells.

You keep assuring me and you keep being dime a dozen off-the-production-line.

>she's currently in cells
Somehow, going to jail because you didn't want to tell your boyfriend you're a slut seems like some sort of strange power fantasy.

You're dating an undercover sex worker. Congratulations

she only told me cos her friends told on her. I should have been able to decide if I wanted to be with someone who chose that line of work.

it will be a classic tale for me to re-tell in years to come
thanks !

It's ok, user. I don't expect much out of you anyway. My assurances in lieu of an explanation were only so I could speak to you on a level you'd understand.

I'm sure she was delightful physically which is why I wanted her cam name in the first place so I could be delighted by her body as well. Also, are you bragging about fucking your camwhore girlfriend even though this whole thread is about how disgusted you are at her being a camwhore?

>What do you think of or call to mind when you say we are in the wrong for refusing to judge?
I see people who don't want to be judged themselves, because that is a natural outgrowth of judging. It's a truism that people are their own worst critics, that's why we have things like peer review, editors for publications, regulations against doctors treating themselves, and so on. But dare to suggest a similar system with upholding morals, and you get bombarded with legions of degenerates who are terrified of being held responsible for their actions or transgressions.

The bottom line is, which is more effective--each individual making and policing their own values and behaviors (despite every single other issue shitting on this, as above), or individuals monitoring each other within society? Obviously, when people mutually cover each other's blind spots by judging actions, it will have a far better effect than if you have a moral free-for-all.

One last analogy: say that immorality, is represented by some dangerous substance, like sulfuric acid, collected in a vast pool. Then say that the population of a society is dropped in here, and they clearly don't want to fall in. So how do they best survive? Take two opposing cases, representing our current cowardly refusal to judge, and the mutual reinforcement of good behavior I mentioned:
1. In an "individualistic" society (in quotes because that's a perversion of the idea), each person dumped in there takes a long but thin metal pole, which is planted in the floor. Everyone, to avoid falling in, must perfectly balance themselves on their own pole, being out of reach of others. While some are naturally good at balancing themselves, many aren't, and they fall.
2. Before being dumped in, in a society with strong morals, each person contributes one section of rope for a massive net, which is then suspended above the acid. Now nobody falls in unless they're suicidal and squirm their way through the openings.

you have a right to be angry about this. That's a pretty huge thing to not tell someone about. It's... it's telling of her character as well. She's doing it because it's easy. She would see out extremely quickly rather than work for something.

And she's not going to stop doing it. She started doing it because she needed money (probably not even that badly, I have a feeling her school is already paid for) and when she graduates she's going to find out extremely quickly that it is not easy to find a real job. She will keep doing it for as long as she can, which will probably be yeeaarrrssss.

You will also have to deal with being with a cam whore... who are the kind of girls that fucking collect orbiters like god damn pokemon. This is going to make the relationship a living fucking hell because every single time you guys have an argument... who do you think she is going to go to for advice/validation? Those fucking orbiters.

And they are ALL going to say nasty shit about you and over time she's going to believe them. What do you think someone like that is going to do? Realize her own faults and change to be a better person? Or believe all these guys that are telling her that she is a goddess and perfect and doesn't need to deal with such an abusive man like you.

dump her and never look back.

going to jail because you've aggressively trespassed, tried to force entry and screamed and wailled until the nieghbors came out is a strange sort of something - but not a fantasy for me

im not really bragging,i think ive been very open how sad and upsetting this has all been.

when i was balls deep I didn't know she was a camgirl. so i got to enjoy her in ignorance....it really was bliss.

but its done now, we're going out later i'll find someone to take my mind off it. i'll be very specific when asking about their occupation!

thanks your pretty much spot on. she does need to work for college, over here though we get stuff paid if we're poor so she has some state support. but there are other jobs, there are a few big employers here who love students as part time work and it pays ok. I don't know how much cam girls make, but you can have a good student life here with a part time job

And while you were balls deep in her she had just been roleplaying for other men that they were balls deep in her too. She was screaming out their name with every thrust of her dildo. So sad...

>she certainly wont be caming tonight as she's currently in cells.
topkek
btfo

Yup, all of it because she wouldn't come clean to start about how she turned a buck.
She might even have a boyfriend still, if she had. It's just so bizarre.

Wildest thing is how they'll still think she's the victim.

>come out as judgmental fuckboy
>gee guys, what are they being so mean???

Not nearly as sad as your larping, guy.
You say 'a level I can understand' but you're really just that far up your own ass.

You can sugarcoat all you want, she's a sex worker and has been selling her body to other people's satisfaction. It's very convenient to have a line you don't cross - oh, only solo. Oh, just cam, never physical. She's already trivialized sex and hey body for money. How long until she goes all the way? How many people have seen her and ejaculated to her in exchange for money? Call me a prude, but I wouldn't date anyone in such a situation.

>all these people in this thread thinking "keeping a secret" is tantamount to actively lying
I know ya'll bitches would be singing another tune if some poor male stripper got dumped when he came out to his girlfriend about what he actually did for work.

You think maybe if people weren't such judgmental assholes about sex work, they wouldn't need to keep it a secret?

ignorance....bliss.
thank you :)
oh no doubt, my phone is filled with messages from the girls in our 'group' ranging from i should have listened to her, to full on im a bastard how could i.

funnily all the men in the group have been very supportive... though its only a matter of time b4 one of them tries it on with her. and he's welcome..

Aw poor little user! Are your fee fees hurt?

>MUH SLIPPERY SLOPE
Literal retardation.

>this scenario isn't occurring so I can call its outcome!
Wow, nice strawman.
You think maybe if people didn't sell their body and then say "oh I work in IT" then people wouldn't feel lied to?

If ignorance is bliss you must be a living orgasm.

desu because the cam thing is so tied up with the lie, I cant work out if that bothers me as much as the lie. in truth if she'd said 'I'm a nurse/cleaner/shop assistant...." id be annoyed she lied to me. but bcos this lie was motivated because she knew it would be at very least a difficult conversation that's fucked up

>can't produce anything sensible and coherently representative of an adult
>only meaningful output is LARPing

Okay, buddy ol' pal.

This applies to small, irrelevant actions leading to large and "unavoidable" outcomes. Not at all like this--unless you are trying to argue that being okay with your gf masturbating in front of dozens of sweaty neckbeards for money is unrelated to base cuckoldry, in which case you're the one in an untenable position.

OP here: not sure how you can say "working in IT" when you're a cam girl isn't a lie. it is actively lying everytime she made up a conversation with a co worker, everytime she said she was working late on a project - when presumably she was camming.

you think maybe if this sex work hadn't been such a lying asshole I might have been able to make my own rational decision?

It's ok user. You can keep telling yourself that the big bad user is being childish. When mommy gets home make sure to tell her all about me!

>I know ya'll bitches would be singing another tune if some poor male stripper got dumped
Tu quoque is never an argument, and this isn't even true anyway. All sex """workers""" are garbage that should be shot, no exceptions. Jack the Ripper did absolutely nothing wrong.

>You think maybe if people weren't such judgmental assholes about sex work, they wouldn't need to keep it a secret?
Maybe they shouldn't do it, and we wouldn't be assholes? You know, if we legalized rape, it would probably happen in public a lot more often, rather than being restricted to seedy encounters in alleyways next to bars. Does that mean we should legalize it? No.

>childish
I really put you more on the level of a 60something hobo who thinks getting drunk makes him 'sociable,' and not a huge nuisance.
Like I said, you're in a thread larping up about some girl you'll never see or meet.

I mean, I guess as long as you believe your lies, nobody else has to when your life takes place on the internet....

That just means she’s a whore.

Even tho she’s not having sex with men. She’s using sex to make money. She’s using her body as product.

That’s what a whore is

It's funny you say that because I met a 60 something drunk hobo on my walk just a few minutes ago. He said he had been drinking all day and offered me a swig from his bottle of captain Morgan.

Anyway, that's a nice fantasy you have of me. Does it make you all warm inside and give you a wry grin? I'm doing my best to be able to see this girl but OP just won't deliver. It's a shame.

Being a cam girl is fine, whats not fine is hiding it drom you. She shpuldnhave been open and honest about it from the beginning when you guys got to know each other and what you do.

>being a cam girl is fine

Yeah.. if you’re a beta cuck

Its literally impossible to be a cam gurl if your a beta cuck, what are you even saying user?

The boyfriend is a beta cuck

Oh well now that he knows. However he could cam with her and they could make money fucking on chaturbate

well first you gotta ask yourself if it bothers you and if it doesn't your all good man.

but if it does then that's a problem and that's gonna suck for both of you, if you can see yourself being able to accept it then please do so. imo it doesn't matter much. but if you do see it as a problem and it's gonna bother you then maybe consider splitting off but give yourself sometime to think.

I hope things go well for you guys, if it's all good with you reasurre her that that's ok and that it's good she only is one until she graduates.

Something tells me that if she would've been hiding her profession as a doctor there would be a much different response.

Both things are being judged here.

Don a mask, be a team, earn more money by taking paid requests.

dont date a practicing whore, date one once she stops if thats your fetish but dont date practicing whores

Don't listen to the anons saying stuff like "How could someone who showed their boobs raise a kid???????" they are idiots.

It depends on how comfortable you are personally with it. If the camming part dosen't bother you too much when you talk to her focus more on the lie part. Has she lied to you before? Is it a pattern or a one time thing? Coming out and saying you cam isn't exactly the first thing you want to tell people usually and once you are in a lie like that its hard to get out so I'd say just to remember that and take it into account when discussing with them. Don't ghost them. At least have a conversation with them about it even if you aren't going to stay with them.

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I don't know why this bothers you guys, I'd be stoked if my gf was a camgirl. I'd see if I could fuck her on her stream. My dick isn't impressive (5.5 in) but it would still be awesome.

Let me guess, you dont consume porn?