Hey Jow Forums, wanna hear a joke?

Kids probably slaying puss, women love faggy little guys like that

>There's nothing elite about you.

Not sure why it is your business. But when I was drafted into the Austrian army many years ago, I went for the 1yr voluntary extension and after basic participated in the Jagdkommano entrance exam. Trust me, some weightlifting bodybuilder could never be in special ops units. For good reason.

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>What are you going on about?
He clearly says that arnold is a faggot meaws.com/arnold-schwarzeneggers-gay-past/?doing_wp_cron=1544343682.2154359817504882812500
That's not news. Even stalone said that arnold fucked producers in order to get movies.

>bodybuilder
I was in greek special forces. Bodybuilders are a piece of turd capable only of flexing for a couple minutes.
You need to be tough, physically and mentally, in order to withstand in the constant pressure of the army.

Lmao, yeah that never happened. You're probably still in school. 1 on 1, I would kick your euro ass.

Bitter manlets with pissening low one rep maxes

/this/

Soldiering is a question of mental toughness and physical toughness. It isn’t the bodybuilders who can do true soldiering.

What never happened? Every recruit in the Austrian army has the right to try out for Jagdkommando after basic. I actually said it from the start and got stationed in the South of Vienna where thd Jgdk is located for basic. Made it through the entrance test and the endurance test, but hurt my knee 2 weeks later and had to stop training. Which is a shame, one of two things I sincerely regret in my life.

Benching will never get you Artillery bro strength.

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Checked

It's Hollywood user it's all a kike fantasy land where men are gay and woman are traps. Did you really think the epitome of aryan male physical prowess you were being sold was a reality ?

No you didn't. My biceps are bigger than yours and I could probably throw your pre pubescent role playing ass across the room.

Flat ground. Uses small chain ring. Muh muscles. Fucking pansy.

You can get big from Calisthentics and awesome endurance.
Do Push ups,Pull Ups everyday.throw in some Squats/DB Curls,Dips,Sit ups
Everyday 2x if you wish,eat meat and grow. Its what my mate did in prison for 8months and got ripped.

Implying people lift to fire artillery rounds... I see and hear this everyday, fat/scrawny cunts who are bitter as fuck trying to tear you down for doing what you're doing with these bullshit reasons, and this German guy before...yikes, talk about cope

>weightlifting
>bodybuilder
One doesnt have to be a bodybuilder to weightlift, when I started gym I about 155lbs (70kg), now I am about 180 (80kg). Weightlifting is legit way to get stronger

>My mate in prison

Remove the flag Daquan

This

>My biceps are bigger than yours

So? It might actually be. Doesn’t mean you can scale a mountain with 40lbs on your back and then ski down the other side with your Steyr AUG at night to kill Russkies who invaded the country like in Afghanistan.

I-is that a ww2 nazi mg42?

Muscle mass can be counterproductive for soldiering. What you want is a body that allows you to carry your pack and rifle and manage to get through rough terrain for 4hrs at a high pace.

What if you can do both?

Well if a dyel like you can do it, it should be a breeze for me.
Also you don't do those things. You never have. Quit telling lies.

It’s an MG3, it is a modified MG42 designed in the 70s. We use it in Austria as our standard MG.

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THIS

I've never met a bodybuilder capable of doing a 30km hump or any of the shit soldiers do. They are too busy crying about how doing real men's work will fuck up their 'gains'.

What the hell? I go skiing all the time. And we did so in the Austrian Army too. 65% of our country is mountain terrain and our official defense strategy is to retreat to the mountains in case of an invasion.

That type of body still needs to have sufficient muscle mass, not excessive though, but still more than a regular non gym person.

Smol forearms

>They are too busy crying about how doing real men's work will fuck up their 'gains'.
>They spend all their time in the gym, or as I call it, the douche house.

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Nope. You never did that. You're probably not even from Austria.

Maxlet detected

???

I am from Austria. It’s not like I said Australia. I said Austria. Who in his right mind would fake being from Austria, Austria is a shithole and our army sucks - the Jagdkommando is a notable exception, it’s a good unit.

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It's a unit that you weren't in.

Last year my 1 rep max on bench was 455. No wrist wraps, no special shirt. No bouncing off of chest. Right now its down to 405, but I have not been training as much.

Where can I buy one?

rejected asvab spotted

Maybe in your shitty army. Here in Australia all our SF dudes are fucking massive and fit to boot.

It’s an MG. Don’t you need a tax stamp for automatic rifles?

Says who? Also, why the hell should I lie. It’s not like I would get anything from it. Not to mention, I said I had to break off training within 2 weeks which actually means I never really was in the Jgdk properly, which sucks. I just went back to being a Jäger, and had to do “defend the border” nonsense back when we Austrians still truly did border patrolling.

>tfw in 1000lb club and not many Jow Forumstards can join me in such glory

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yes

Doubt.

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im there with ya fgt

>Maxlet
What does this mean?

Yikes, change your eating habits, you're 800lbs overweight

This post was made by dad jokes gang

You're just stroking your e-peen. The fact that you only lasted a couple of weeks in your fantasy just goes to show how sad your real life must actually be.

It means you one rep maxes at lifting weights are pathetic

your*

Yeah, I'm mostly just memeing, we can't import full autos anyway. That said, it's not hard to make a semi-auto either effectively full auto, or literally full auto. Full auto is rarely useful anyway though, it's mostly just being told you can't have something and as a result wanting it, whether you need it or not.

>right believe in personal gain
>lefties indulge in victimhood

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Being a brainlet with weak threat assassment cortexes causes left wing political views. This was proven with legit research a while ago.

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lemme see them maxes boi

Tattoos are for sailors, convicts, and prostitutes

Quit making excuses Balki

i usually dont tain because there is never time, but i'm guessing 110-120 kilos maybe. tfw thin.

I used to bench higher back when i trained frequently and watched what i ate. Inner-Biceps Curl at around 40 kilos at max

>LGBTQIA TASK FORCE
lmao what fucking meme country is this from
>inb4 Canada

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>1rep max
Wrong pic, faggot.

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I got through the entrance exam and 48hrs endurance test. We had almost 80 prople trying out and only 6 made it through back then. So I was actually pretty astonished about myself. I like the cold and it was -20C for parts of the endurance test at night (it is in February) which got lots of people to quit.

>being strong makes you right wing
Yea
>being a leftie makes you gay
Yea

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>Inner-Biceps Curl at around 40 kilos at max
not dumbell, 40 in each hand :p

You making this up as you go or have you rehearsed this?

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I've never lifted and I'm 31, 6'4". 215 lbs ish, how fucked am I if I try to begin lifting?

You will probably have decent one rep maxes, beacuse you're a big guy. No worries

Thanks, I'm gonna go for gold!

I am not German.

Nope, the entrance test is in February, once a year. I started in October for basic and also prepared for the entrance test. The formal criteria for entrance are actually relatively low, most people get through them easily. But then the endurance test is modelled after the 5 day Navy Seals “hell week”, just in the cold and with a way more brutal dropout rate.

you're both absolutely god damn right. i worked a fairly infamous job here for years, think extreme heat plus cardio. we couldn't get enough men to volunteer let alone stick around more than a week. i watched "peak fit" reserve grade football players bitch out after a day and puffer fish gym princesses literally run to the car park and leave after a few hours. my best friend worked the same job with me and left to join the Army and said his basic and rifleman training was a paid vacation compared to his old job.

the yardstick to measure fitness is farming or firefighting IMHO. anything else is just narcissists trying to look pretty. but once you know the difference you can spot it anywhere. Arnold and his muscles doesn't scare me, but a farmer with nine cans of rum under his belt after a bad week sure does.

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It's not too late, and at your age you could justify running test for some quick and easy gains. You will be known as that 30+ boomer in the gym though.

>machine guns

Yep, you're just pretending. It's sad really.

>Austrian
>Not German

kek

I'm not worried, I've got a wife and kids and could probably afford a home gym soon. I'm tired of being dyel though, it's time to get BIG.

Makes sense. youtube.com/watch?v=l324lEp9x-8