You get a phone call from Vladimir offering you to move to Russia...

Throw in a Russian qt3.14 and a Russian language course and we have a deal.

Based, I want to move to Russia considering its got more a spine then Western countries. Time to learn Russian I suppose

i would accept, better deal then america is offering atm

send me to sochi comrade

When do I start ?

Imagine living in the same country as mummy.

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I'd rather Putin not be aware that I exist.

Mummy is actually kinda fucked in the head, most russians know that
Really cute still

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Tbh I actually do like to imagine that Putin is actually hacking the US on a daily basis just for keks

AYO WHERE DA RUSSIAN WOMENZ AT?

>Well-paying job.
>Russia.

Pick one.

Really, how so?

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мeня Pyccкaя дeвyшкa?

fuck your optics, i'm going in

all women are kind of fucked in the head, they are not on the same level mentally as a man

The first thing she did when she came in power is prohibiting Kazantip. - bad crazy
When russian vatniks paraded with portraits of their grandparents who died in ww2, she paraded in the same parade with a portrait of tzar Nikolai 2 - good crazy tbqh

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Cant find an english news article on this, but basically she's obsessed with Nikolai II so much that she has a picture of him on her work table and actually was telling people how she saw a statue of him cry blood. After she said that she was not allowed to give speeches in the duma again lol
And this

If it 2x my current pay, then yes

Actually there's a bunch of well-paid jobs there, but if you trust fags from 2ch everyone earns 15k a month, which mostly only wagecucks do

OK. I don't understand most of the significance of this tbqdesu.
He's her husbando.

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I never wished I looked just like the fucking tzar.
Jesus.

A political satire show "Die Anstalt" in german public TV stated that Trump is maybe the revenge for Boris Yeltsin.

In germany and russia it's widely believed, that the USA meddled in russia to get Yeltsin elected.

Her husbando is shit and most russian people dislike him to say to say the least
You have to be a special kind of retarded to make your countrymen prefer communism over you

You don't choose your husbando, your husbando chooses you. I thought you'd know that Japan.

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I’d be tempted but can’t be fucked to learn Russian, besides I like my job here even if it dosent pay that well.

Throw in a Russian waifus and switch the apartment for a home with land please. Someone who lives where they have nothing to protect is not a patriot and thus cannot make decisions with the best of the country in mind.

AND THATS WHY ALL THE CITYFAGS ARE SHIT TIER.

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Sorry Mr Putin, had you called when Obama was in office and you were the best national leader in the world I might have said yes. But Trump is President now and there's hope for America.

If it included lessons on language and culture so that I could respectfully integrate, I'd think about it. I like muh guns though so I might just move to a more free state here and integrate.

>complete with a steady well paid job
Russia: GDP per capita $6,000.
I had a brief holiday romance with a Russian grill (shockingly 18 years old - I’m a monster, but it was good). It was £5,000 pw at my resort (£7,500).
I wondered how she and all the other Russians could afford to be in my hotel, I didn’t ask her about money because she was there with her mum and grandparents (I told you I’m a monster). When I got back a Russian here told me that most are ‘stupid peasants’ but there’s a whole class of entrepreneurs making a good living off them.
If the $6,000 is an average after entrepreneurs are taken into account it means that most of them live in even less than $6,000 per year.
I wish I had some pics if that girl, she was absolutely beautiful too, bright blue eyes, blonde. I don’t know what I’m thinking sometimes, I should have brought her back here to care for me in my old age, paid her in lollipops.

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Can I leave my wife here?

She is babushka nowadays

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The truth is the UK could beat Russia in a nuclear war scenario.
Russia is rightful British clay.

>I had a brief holiday romance with a Russian grill (shockingly 18 years old
Was she even a virgin?

>she was absolutely beautiful too, bright blue eyes, blonde
Nice LARP Shakespear

what about the dogs

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>job
no thanks lmao

>18 years old
>virgin
>Russia

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>complete with an apartment
That would be a downgrade from my current lifestyle.

>the best national leader in the world
so that leftist bs actually helped trump into office? what an irony
Also if you're joking it's not funny (burst in tears)

>Russia
>pay

As much as I'd be tempted to say yes, I'd have to respectfully decline his offer.
I'd rather be a neet in my parents basement than live in the cold inhospitable climate of Russia.

Oh, really? Do explain.

Which western faggot do you want me to kill?

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Sure. St. Petersburg because they have one of the least expensive indoor skydiving tunnels in the world.

I would always choose Sochi, Astrakhan or Rostov

I rather have my clean tap water, pension and a future for my children thank you

pigshit russian

They do, and you'll likely speak with them this soon, but you'll be none the wiser.

send the car around, brat

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Your women are a strange breed for sure.

I would do it

yes, in a heartbeat!

I don't speak russian so no

You pepper spray them. You could also carry some meatballs laced with strychnine in to get rid of the feral packs.

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Maybe if he upped the ante to a house and 40 acres of decent land

I’m in. Russian women are hot and there’s not as many kikes.

fuckin sweet. so i have a secret service bodyguard is what youre saying.

>move to Russia
>get hot 3d 18y/o Russian Waifski
>come back to hometown with my KGB monitor
>go to bar, pick fights with people I hate
>Ivan breaks their necks
>come back to mother Russia a satisfied man

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Is that the new jake Paul flick?

Accept.

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I'm not white though, can I still into Poccия?

>"yes, Tsar Vlad. Imminently, sir. What's that? Destroying Westo*ds? With utmost joy, sir"

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Ask him if he wants to play hockey next Friday

nigga you haven't seen Red Skorpion?

why the fuck are you even on pol? Do you hate yourself that much?

>Pension

Dumb, often mismanaged Ponzi scheme. I'd rather take my full pay and save for my own retirement, instead of trusting someone else to do it for me.

>ooga booga where the kawaii russian womyn at

as long as i get to have guns im in

That's pontius pilate, not caesar. Putin is a chinlet, and does not have a roman phenotype at all.

>Putin himself calling you
>with an offer like this

yeah fuck no he is clearly wanting to assassinate me or some other shady shit

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Pretty much, Barron

>apartment in city of joice
>well paid job
I would move to literally any slav country if these two were gauranteed.

He already is giving land to boer refugees. I hope one day he will welcome all white refugees fleeing multiculturalism.

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yes but swap the city apartment for some acreage to do smallholding on. I would produce nice cheese. seems to be in short supply in Russia

Make it a house and land with enough space for a proper garage near Kaliningrad plus some russian lessons, count me in.
Hi ASIO!

YES

Non white detected

i could get into this life style to desu

Probably but I'd like to live in Moscow

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I already own an apartment in Russia and can move there whenever I want. My wife is Russian.

We would move there in a heartbeat if I could keep my current job, and my current salary which is paid in USD. We tried already, my company said "no."

>as long as i get to have guns im in
Also this ^ was admittedly an area of concern for me in this Yeah...Russia is noguns.

"Shut up jew"

omg......who is that hot boy??

Entering password for the password is hacking
kek

Pretty much the same thing happened to me desu, feelsgoodman.

Does the apartment come with a grill?

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>jewtin

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people like you deserve the gallows. insufferable little shit