My girlfriend has been letting a friend of hers stay at our house alone while she's at work and I'm out of town...

My girlfriend has been letting a friend of hers stay at our house alone while she's at work and I'm out of town. I've told her I'm not okay with this because A) it's a liability issue and B) I feel like her hospitality is being taken advantage of. She insists I'm being unreasonable. Which is it?? Should I take a chill pill or should she stop letting this happen?

Attached: hqdefault.jpg (480x360, 11K)

You're being unreasonable.

Okay. Why? I don't know the person well at all, and I don't find it totally normal to want to stay at someone's house when they're gone..

Bump?

Is he black?

Huehuehue dang good one

Her friend is a girl

I mean, you have as much a right to decide who gets to stay in your house as she does...
Compromise is one thing but if you're uncomfortable with it and she's stifling that, you just found yourself a red flag.

Is she black?

What would a compromise be in this situation? I don't really want someone I'm unfamiliar with staying at my house alone - who admittedly has done nothing wrong - but my girlfriend says it makes her feel more comfortable having someone around

>more comfortable having someone around
A) That's kinda your job.
B) A compromise would be 'they can have two weeks but they're out after that' for instance
C) I hate to press this question but what's their relationship like? Is the friend a male?

Yeah I don't like being gone for so long. This is one of her good girl friends from work.

I mean yeah I dunno, this is worrisome because I can sympathize with both positions a little, but her being unbudging seems awful. Does she not have any family that she can have stay there, or can't she just not have them stay there like a roommate??

Like why won't she compromise, that's the weird thing to me. As soon as I hear about that I usually assume the girl's the kind who never respects the guy and that's a dead relationship.

I personally wouldn't see the big deal but I understand where you're coming from. There isn't much room for compromise here either.

I'm not sure what to tell you honestly lol

There are some really important details missing here. How long has this been going on, how often does it happen, and is there an end in sight or does your girlfriend want permanent open borders?

Yeah shit I feel like this might be one of those pick-your-battles situations.. as long as the girl doesn't fuck my stuff up I might as well not rock the boat?

>I don't find it totally normal to want to stay at someone's house when they're gone..
well, how long do they know each other?
I don't think it's that weird to offer your house/flat to someone while you're and they're in the area
at least not as long as I know them

I go out of town for around 1-3 weeks about every other month, so currently it's been going on intermittently for a couple weeks. She's maybe been at the house alone a handful of times. When I'm home the girl basically doesn't come over.

Unfortunately we live very far away from her family and this girl is one of her only good friends in the area

Well shit, this just creates more questions.

>Does she just stay during the daytime, overnight, or for several nights?
>Why doesn't she come over when you're at home? That's very odd, I think.
>Why exactly does she need to be at your place instead of a place of her own?

>Depends, when I'm not there she'll usually stay a night or two and hang out during the day sometimes while my gf is at work
>I don't really know her, and when I'm home my gf and I try to spend a lot of time together
>her only other option is her family's house which apparently isn't a great family

>Depends, when I'm not there she'll usually stay a night or two and hang out during the day sometimes while my gf is at work
That's really strange, I think. If you're truly uncomfortable with it, she shouldn't be at your place at all.

>I don't really know her, and when I'm home my gf and I try to spend a lot of time together
What I want to know is how this started happening if you don't really know her. Would I be right in assuming your girlfriend gave this girl the okay without actually getting your input first? If so, that would probably be the biggest issue.

>her only other option is her family's house which apparently isn't a great family
Well, I guess what I mean to ask is if she's recently been kicked out of her home, or if she's dealing with an abusive relationship, etc, you know? Like, does she -really- need to be spending all this time at your place, or is she just bumming on your couch because it's convenient?

Honestly, if I was in your shoes, this is the compromise I'd propose to the girlfriend: If the woman is going to be staying at your place, essentially living there when you're not around, she needs to pay rent, or have a specific way of helping out around the house. And EVEN IF she were to do either (or both) of those things, if you didn't ask to take on another person in YOUR OWN home, you shouldn't have to deal with someone else there!

If you feel strongly enough about this, I'd say give it a deadline, or at least discussing a deadline. I'd definitely suggest being open minded about this girl's reasons for wanting to be there, for her AND your SO's sake, but enough is enough. You shouldn't be forced to be uncomfortable just because someone else doesn't have their shit together. If your girlfriend has no empathy for the way you feel on this, that's a MAJOR red flag. Just wait for the day when she tells the in-laws they can stay with you.