I am in need of some help desperately and need advice. Long story short, I've struggled with women in my mid twenties and my last and first relationship a year ago, ended due to her cheating and our group of friends shattering. I've been alone since then, and have been considering a realistic doll for companionship. But truthfully, I'm very upset still about what happened and really avoid interacting with people as I cannot trust anyone anymore. But I feel like "talking" to a doll will only cement my detachment from humanity...and I really never thought my life would go like this.
There's a girl in my math class who had been talking to me and being very in my space, but I don't know if she's just using me for attention or not. I was thinking about asking her out, but I've spent the last year reading stories about infidelity, breakups and seeing people I know deal with similar things. My heart can't take another thrashing like that, I just want someone to talk to, I don't really care about how they even look anymore.
Anyway the doll I was looking at is $1409 CAD(pic related). I could ask the girl in my class tomorrow for her number, but I think she's just toying with me. I'm so lost. What do I do?
I should add that what's eating away at me isn't sex, but companionship. I waited a couple months before doing anything with "gf" at the time even as I just wanted a good connection with someone and to share my life with. I think that deep down, I'm hesitant on this doll purchase because I know that it'll never be able to talk back to me or share stories.
You're thinking way too hard man.
Chill out. Ask if she wants to hangout.
Don't over complicate simple things.
How am I thinking too hard? I've thought about why I wanted a doll, yes, and I've thought about what this woman in my class is doing; but the latter only because my last relationship started off the exact same way.
She usually stops to talk to me during break by the library, so I was thinking to just meet her there as usual tomorrow and ask for her number and go from there.
Don't buy a love doll that's going to be something you cringe about when you're out of this rut. You're only considering this because you're desperate and lonely. From an outsider's perspective this is just sad. Ask the math girl out, you have nothing to lose. Spend your money on some form-fitting clothes and a watch or something to boost your self esteem and talk to other women or that math girl if she said yes.
I was in excellent shape, made great dinners, listened and stood beside that woman within reason. I still got traded in for something "better", better man than me have lost that gamble. I do want to ask out the math girl, but I've gained weight, wear baggy clothes to hide it and do feel quite depressed, yes. But that's why I'm not sure what this girls thinking, I know that just because I think poorly of myself at the moment, doesn't mean that others do. Sure. I just have trouble trusting women.
>I cannot trust anyone anymore. >My heart can't take another thrashing >I just want someone to talk to How is it that 'just talk'ing to someone puts you at risk of being betrayed and having your heart thrashed? I might be reading too much into your post, but it sounds like you might have some boundary issues.
>help desperately >I'm so lost. Sort yourself out as a single person. Make some good male friends you trust enough to be open and vulnerable with, instead of women. Text that girl, but don't date her, even if she's interested.
You've been in 1 relationship. Very few people marry the first person they start a relationship with. Your happiness doesn't need to be tied with someone else. Work on you. Guys this far in a pathetic rut can slingshot back and do great things.
How? Because every single conversation I had with that woman AND my good male friends was moot. Because in the end she took back everything she said, and my male friends continued to hang out with her friends group. I don't say I don't trust people referring to women only, it seems that most men will throw you under the bus just to be next to women too.
And didn't you just tell me to not over think things and ask her out? Or was that another user? I'd say I've been in many relationships, with that one being the most "secure". I've been led on, thrown away and pulled back so many times that the idea of dating just exhausts me. I've been telling myself that I don't need anyone to be happy for years, and I was for a long time, content just doing my own thing and hanging out with male "friends". It's just that after this, I've felt incredibly empty, angry and betrayed on a deep level and cannot let it go. I don't know how to get back to single me where I was happy minding my own business. I just feel "not good enough" these days.
Man, you sound like a whiny bitch
I'm Aussie and a few of my mates have gone to Thailand to get over women. It's about $500 a ticket and 3k for 2 weeks of sex/food/accommodation. Just checked for Canada and it's 2k for a round trip lmao
I bought a doll once. It was expensive and I went all out on everything to make it seem as real as possible. It was a complete waste of money. It's an absolute pain to move around/position etc. It is incredibly cold and extremely difficult to warm up. If you are planning on 'talking' to the doll I'm sure you will be disappointed. Don't get one unless you have some serious social problems. You sound like you are just having a bad time right now. Give it a chance with that girl, or just take it easy for awhile. The doll won't help you.
I think chasing prostitutes might not be the best idea for me mentally. I know, "and a doll is?" No, it's probably not either, but I'm hoping it'll give me that "presence" of another person without the drama. I think I do have serious social problems due to the way I think about people and women specifically. I'm 31 and don't see a future at all with interpersonal relationships, I'm scared really.
Nah, he sees women for what they are.
Well if you have money to burn then go ahead and try out a doll. I say there's a 90% chance that it will be a complete disappointment and you'll throw it away in less than a month. But if you can spare the money then it might be worth it as a way to learn something about yourself.
Hey I agree. It's hard to find friends that treat you with respect. I've never found any. I have come to the decision that people, even friends, just use eachother. But it's ok, just accept that people are not perfect, and you are not either. Forgive and forget, but don't let people abuse you.
Love dolls are cheaper, cleaner and better than being women.
You can cook food yourself
And what happens when someone that's already mentally on the edge, jumps off into utter isolation? How do they ever come back to interacting with other people normally?
Well, the girl I mentioned didn't even bother with me today as I thought she would. Pretty much buried in her phone during break.
When you buy a sex doll you know you've hit absolutely rock bottom
Gf and nothing are both valid options. Love doll will only make things worse. It will screw you psychologically. Your future you will thank you if you stay away from those things.
That's very over-dramatic. Buying a sex doll won't warp your mind like it's some kind of brainwashing device. It's just an overgrown fleshlight. You might feel stupid afterwards if you decide you don't like it, but that's all.