My husband started my morning by waking up to inform me he was late for work and yelling at me about how he couldn't...

My husband started my morning by waking up to inform me he was late for work and yelling at me about how he couldn't find my things, and then calling me useless and refusing to kiss me goodbye,leaving me to cry alone in bed.
why are men so angry when they're younger? i apologize in advance for the generalization, but all the men in my life (exes, my father, my uncles, my cousins) all went through an "angry phase"
my question is why? and if you're a man, did you go through one? are you going through one?

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I did not go through one. Your boyfriend (and you) sound like some cliche white people

Men are literally (metaphorically) not allowed to be sad or scared. The only negative emotion they're left with is anger.

neither of us are white.

Thats stupid. If you’re incredibly self concious sure. Not if you’re a man. What does that have to do with what emotions you allow yourself to feel?

Actually, I can relate. I don’t explode, but I get anxious and irratable and sometimes say hurtful things for no reason. Just stress I would say; been on a job hunt these past couple months, all the while working one I hate.

And the reason we lash out is because we feel powerless in our own lives, so criticizing other people’s ineptitude/lack of organization is the closest thing we have to control. But not really though ;)

You have to state how its making you upset and ask what is he asking of you and also let him know there is a time and place for a discussion, but its wrong to start the day with abuse.

I do that too, but I am still considerate about other people most the time. Sometimes I get snappy, but I realize when ive made a mistake.

Honestly, how do you fix it? Because my brother is an asshole non stop. i wonder if your reasoning is accurate.

I've tried to talk to him, he manipulates the situation. "I'm always the bad guy," he says. So I've given up on trying to get him to see how he hurts me. But I appreciate your input.

It's real simple. There are two situations in which little boys are told to "man up" when they're scared to "take it like a man" when they're sad. As soon as you can speak in full sentences you're taught to always be brave and never cry. It's as ingrained as anything else you learned at that age.

In my experience its mosstly men who give up on situations, thinking it doesn't matter and isnt the effort. And women are usually ones who stick to a plan and get it done because its what is right. You have to take responsibility and stand up for yourself.

>ooga booga bix nood white people sheeeeeit
>turns out neither of them are white
whoops
P.S. Black men just beat their wives.

Get out.

Girl, that shit is not going to get any better. Your boyfriend is a loser.

I'm not going to ramble in this post because you're not going to listen to any of it, but if you know what's good for you then you'll find a man who respects you as a person. Don't let your shitty upbringing and previous relationships make you think it's normal for men to act like baboons, and never let another person devalue your self-worth. Fuck him. You can do better.

Let me tell you my friend, that whoever put that into your mind was the real idiot. I don’t want to sound condescending but imo a real man would embrace and learn from negative experiences, not ignore them. What you just described is basically a recipe for alcoholism. Men don’t need to hide from any feeling, and the idea your talking about just promotes that. Let it go. I don’t follow it, you don’t follow it. It’s not “distilled” into you, it’s just self consiousness that must be overcame. Being afraid of your feelings is not “manly”, but concerning and only leads to problems. Talking things through is how we have done it since the beginning of time. A real man is someone who can help a fellow person when he is down, no ridiculing then for being weak.

Did you get this info from some teen girl blog site or some shit? I let out any emotion I'm feeling I don't give a shit what society or who ever the fuck thinks

Fuck you all. This is the truth.

he has deep seated insecurities so he lashes out to displace those feelings.
he's gotta figure out what it is that makes him unhappy and fix that. try to help him figure out what the issue is.

>A real man is someone who can help a fellow person when he is down, not ridiculing them for being weak.
Personally I don't agree with your definition of a man, I think that's how you define it so it fits you.
People who say their 'true strength' is helping weak people when they're down, are coping with the fact they can't compete with the strong standing up.
This isn't meant negatively in any way, some people can do both.