There's this guy who pisses me off so much. He's in my circle of friends, but he always gets roasted for being such a weak pussy. If you punch him he will never punch back, he just tries to ignore it and says he's "a pacifist" if we tell him to punch back. He is afraid of confrontation, against facing his fears and makes an effort to tell white lies over the truth. He tries to conceal his emotions and as much as I dislike the word, he is very beta. He is living in a bubble, he's so naive and ignorant of the world and is a fucking adult. I've talked to him several times and he sees nothing wrong with the way he acts or thinks. I honestly doubt if he will ever learn. He tolerates his mediocrity and doesn't want to change.
Here's the problem. I am wasting my energy thinking about this idiot, but I enjoy the anger it brings me. How do I figure out why he makes me so angry and is it safe to continue to use the anger if I fuel it into something else? I'm not going to cut him off because it would kill morale if we just abandoned this guy.
Quit being such a faggot bully and give him room to exist. He's probably really cool and you're just projecting your troll bullshit onto him.
Noah Reyes
>if you punch him he never punches back Why is this a bad thing? >Holy shit a male isn't violence driven, better try and change him!! Go fuck yourself dickwad.
Camden Richardson
>How do I figure out why he makes me so angry I have the same reaction whenever I see a 30 year old manchild. For me, it is because I know that these people could make so much out of their life, but because they never leave their comfort zone and just stay beta, they never know how great they can be. They are simply content with being subpar, or they will say they are happy - but deep down you and I (and that guy) know that you cannot be content with your life being like that. I was like this years ago and turned my life around completely. If I stayed like that, I'd be a depressed sack of shit by now. Whenever I see someone not wanting to change, I get angry and use that anger to tell myself that I'm not going to end up like that. The anger motivates me to make something out of my life and to keep on improving.
Christian Baker
>I get angry because of how others choose to live yikes
Oliver Kelly
>>I get angry because of how others choose to live >yikes they don't choose to live like that, that's exactly my point. they ended up living like that and changing, or even wanting to change, is too much of a struggle for them.
Jaxson Collins
>assuming things big yikes
Christian Edwards
Exactly same here. This guy is throwing away so much potential in the most important years. And I've become his friend. It bothers me. I used to be very similar to him (not as bad though, you have no idea) and I know that if everyone just showered me with positivity and convinced me to never change I would be absolutely pathetic.
Samuel Cruz
Why does this even matter? It's not your life, get the fuck out of his.
Kayden Howard
I gave him room to exist and I realized how much I dislike him. He has no fighter attitude and is a sensitive, stubborn coward. It's okay to be weak because you can become strong, but this guy simply does not want to be strong. He wants to through life as a wimp. It's his choice, but I simply do not respect it. This guy left the study room because there was a fucking spider inside (common house spider). It crawled on the TV remote and he said he won't use it anymore. Even after we killed it it wasn't good enough for him because we couldn't find its body. That pissed me off. Even our friend with arachnophobia at least faced his fear.
Henry Brown
Quote from a book "how often we try to change negative habits of others but ultimately their patterns reinforce into our behavior as the teacher and the student remains unchanged." Also no matter how much more you think you know, any attempt to communicate the knowledge, no matter how subtle, will always imply that you 'know better' than them. That basically raises a wall of resistance that's near impossible to get around.
Christopher Harris
It pisses me off because he's in our friend circle and by observing this guy it is inevitable for him to piss me off. The thing is, if he leaves, the result is worse than if he stays.
I actually enjoy when he is mocked and insulted. I feel like he deserves it as a consequence for his actions. We always try to take it easy, but the instinct to attack him on his weakness is so strong, it's like my brain is warning me "Stay away."
Bentley White
Infinitely true. I do not think I can change him. I am done trying.
James Murphy
You're just as much of a faggot as he is. Getting so upset about this guy is exactly the same as him being upset with a spider. You're both pathetic.
Leave him alone and find something better to worry about.
Thomas Howard
That's normal shit bro. He is an ingredient in your group dynamic and you are an essential part of his life. You have strengthened him. he has strengthened you. He can be in a predicament without you and ask himself what you would do. You can do the same. Other perspectives are good. Think of the pussy he would be without you.
Caleb White
Yeah getting pissed by his life isn't smart, but I think it can be good. If I channel the anger into my self-improvement then it might end up benefiting me.
Asher Peterson
I can completely understand how it bothers you, but the thing is that nobody can change people. People only change if they want to change. The only thing you can do is to try to make him want to change, by getting to know him and his hopes and his fears, and then showing him how he can achieve what he wants and overcome his struggles. It's a slow process, but it can only start if he really wants to change.
There are some people who had the bad luck of growing up being weak or physically below average, or having the wrong parents and/or the wrong friends and generally just losing in life early on. When you start like that, as a kid, or it happens to you in your teenager years, people will tell you, show you and thereby convince you that you are a loser. Instead of being able to fix your shit through friends and social interactions, you are excluded from all the social stuff because you are the awkward loser or the guy nobody likes. You become reclusive, which leads to you becoming more of a loser and even more awkward. It's really a downward spiral. People will tell you to 'Just be yourself' and 'Just accept who you are, don't compare yourself with others so much :)" Well go suck a fat dick, you DON'T want to be yourself. And it's unfair because you never really had the chance to be normal. At that point there are two options - to fight or to accept that you are a loser. Your friend took the second option, because there was no first option for him - he didn't know what to fight for. He has been so convinced that he's not normal and weak that he just cannot imagine himself being normal. He thinks anyone who wants him to change is just making fun of him, that fighting for change means losing and will just lead him to the point where he is now again, or even make things worse.
Either that, or he's just spoiled and oversheltered.
Jackson Thompson
You're right man. He is an important part of the dynamic. Kicking him out would fuck things up. He has actually become more confident since we met so that's good.
Gavin Price
You want to hatefuck him
Tyler Garcia
That is literally what happened to me. I went from being a guy who was bullied all the time, to being a bully - while also still being bullied by the regular kids. I was picking on the weakest of the weak.
Part of me was just like WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU STAND UP FOR YOURSELF YOU WET DOORMAT GOD YOU'RE PATHETIC but the other part of me was like HELL YEAH THIS AWESOME I CAN SLAP THIS GUY AROUND AND CALL HIM AN UGLY RETARDS AHE JUST SITS THERE AND TAKES IT, THIS IS GREAT. So I understood why people picked on me.
Also, I was like 15 years old back then. You have to be 18 and over to post here.
Ian Hill
> I actually enjoy when he is mocked and insulted. I feel like he deserves it as a consequence for his actions. We always try to take it easy, but the instinct to attack him on his weakness is so strong, it's like my brain is warning me "Stay away."
You're just a fucking dick. Grow up.
Julian Cooper
you wana figure out how to help this guy out, would prolly be pretty nice to see him actually fight for once, problem is guys like this usually wont fight unless they think it's a live or die situation, maybe if you get him drunk enough lol
Elijah Walker
You're absolutely right. Maybe he just never got close with the right people. What's funny is that he's more "normal" than any of us and often tries to act normal which might be why he doesn't fit in as well. The process for change is slow, maybe he will overcome his weaknesses. I hope.
Thomas Collins
this is why I think we have judges. Check this short tale for an example. OP is mistaking other's behavior for his own youtube.com/watch?v=ZZlAwM2OVjY
That happened to me. I never got into play-fighting because it's fake and gay. I got drunk with some friends and one of them got sent to the hospital. He was fine but people saw why I don't wrestle with the bros.
Samuel Scott
It turns me on when he gets punched.
Aaron Gonzalez
My advice is that he should stay far away from you as possible so he doesn't get raped.
Elijah Foster
>should I use the anger this person causes me for something productive? What type of a retarded question is that you retard?
If you did what you did, there is no point to go further. He will learn someday
Lincoln Turner
You understand how fucking stupid it is for a grown ass man to be throwing punches at a friend, right? Are you going to be singing the same tune when someone finally snaps and rearranges your face over the matter? The only thing I can't get is why he continuously interacts with you guys. I'd tell you to fuck yourself. God didn't give my sweet ass this face so you goofy fuckers can mess with it.
We need all sorts of people in society to function OP. Not everyone can be stronger like you, and thats okay
Owen Reed
The punching is rare behaviour. Only did it like six times and spread out over half a year. Each time whoever did it stopped when it was clear he wouldn't stand up for himself which is very depressing to watch.
Logan Rodriguez
>I only assault my friend every so often! You should try to find a more positive way to use your energy. Period.
You and your friends are the odd ones out. He just sounds like he was raised by normal people, rather than farm animals. If it's really important to see him give it back to you (kinda sounds like guilt, by the way), try tempting him into something like boxing. His hangup is that it's generally frowned on by polite society. I'm sure he'll be more comfortable with some proctored brain rattling.
Alexander Torres
Yeah this. punching people is whats weird the guy probably feels like he has no one else and puts up with it. its sad but theres no reason to physically abuse him.
also are you guys 15? seriously question.
Adrian Watson
No, 18. None of us ever punches to hurt each other and it's soft. Just on the arm.
Jason Cooper
Then why is it an issue that he doesn't punch back? Reading this thread you sound like a very toxic friend.
Zachary Fisher
You're honestly fucking retarded and there's no way this isn't bait and/or you're not underaged
Cooper Price
Just kill yourself do the world a favour
Carson Nelson
What you're doing isn't improving him, chances are you won't, you might actually make him worse off than before maybe instead of bullying him into your world view, you can learn to argue your point better (and do it calmy btw, screaming it at them is still bad) if he doesn't change and it really gets on your nerves so much just stop talking to him.
Joseph Nelson
You’re a real hunk if shit. Id sucker punch you in the gut if I had half the chance. Your friend may be holding back but id smack your head in with a rock if no ine was watching.
Parker Russell
I get this feeling from normies a little desu it is good to have a social life and I do drugs and shit aswell but they do absoulutely nothing with their lives but work and party, they never learn anything, never master anything, they just do what they have to and get high a lot and then die. Its horrifying especially when they just ignore anything they don't understand and get angry at people who enjoy those things because durrrr its boring durrrrr its difficult fucking normie scum
Evan Hall
You're not, you take pleasure in his suffering so you're gonna keep doing it for as long as he puts up with you because you're a piece of shit.
Angel Bell
OP is getting friendship lessons from posters on Jow Forums. I hope you know which ones to take with a grain of salt. Pretty sure that most of these anons would get their ass kicked by your pacifist buddy. I think you're a good kind of friend bro. We need more like you.
Kevin Edwards
Same scenario as of now.Maybe he has an "inner problem" or a serious problem that can't face him/her alone.And maybe he needs support.
