Kinda of a long shot since it's Jow Forums

Kinda of a long shot since it's Jow Forums.
I have been in an LDR with a girl that lives on the other side of the US for about 2 years now. We have pretty much set up plans for me to move and us to live together this August.
How do I get past the jitters of moving? As time gets closer I have all sorts of bells and alarms going off in my head and the feeling of calling everything off is growing. She's excited as fuck, but then again I'm leaving everything behind. I worry that in person shit will hit the fan. Though she has been trying to get better with the problems and stress she has been dealing with, so I see her effort.

tldr: I'm a bitch and I'm growing scared to leave my life to move in with my gf in a few months.

Anyone been in this situation or similar that can offer advice, maybe some stories? Good or bad.
Also how did you deal with being lonely and the need for actual affection?

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Hi, bith as in youre female?
Ive felt alone since most of school life, talking usually helps, also, im still a complete virgin since im gay and im already 21 :/

Moving on, youre moving. There, that doesnt mean youre abandoning anyone, nowadays the internet is great for keeping in touch with other people, go and have an adveture, if it hits the fan, you can move back if you want,
The more scared you are, the more important it is for you,
Go, dont miss the party of your life
Good luck on your trip

I've done exactly this last summer and it ended in a disater and me homeless. Everyone's story is unique and subjective, but I had known this girl for 2 years before hand and even meeting a couple times before I actually moved. I was even more sure it would work and she turned out to be completely different person

You do you though, king.

Have you met her in real life?

>LDR

This is not a real relationship, stop wasting your time and find someone to fuck irl

This OP. This can backfire. It's nice to have a backup plan just incase. And not just with women but moving to a new location in general.
Not to mention moving to her location is kind of a bitch move. If you already planned it before hand then it's fine, but leaving everything you know behind for a women just isn't a good idea. They lose respect for you because of it in the long run.
That being said, I think it's a great idea if you are moving out of your high school/collage town. Traveling is always a good idea and makes you a better person overall in a way that you can't get any other way. If it goes well, then good for you, if it doesn't you have a lot more experience and stories to share so try to fond some enjoyment regardless of what happens.

She’s cheating

Good luck.

Have you ever seen her in person?

If not you're basically insane user. If you have, and you trust her, go for it.

Dude, moving to be with a grille.
Thanks.
Yeah, a few times. 3 trips of about a week or two each. The last one being a little bit of a stressfest but that's because we both caught the flu at the end and ended up taking care of each other during the week.
We are kinda moving to a place in her state, but yeah I'm leaving the place that's been my home for my whole life pretty much. As for a back up plan, my family pretty much has my back should shit hit the fan I would have to come back. So I guess it can't be too bad.
As for her seeing me differently because of me going, that's the kind of shit I'm worried about. That she'll change, some is expected. Likely I'll be different to her once we are in the same house everyday.

Do it OP. You have no reason not to, you're here for us to tell you it's a good idea, and I'll approve it on adv's behalf.

At least you have a sound backup plan. Here's how you make this shit not backfire. Let her know without directly telling her that you are there for other reasons too. The fact that you never left your home town is a great start use that. And actually mean it too. Change the reason in your head from going to see her to, getting out of your hometown and getting to meet a cool girl also. That mindset alone will make a huge difference.
If she thinks she's your everything, things won't go well. Good luck user.

What if she thinks I'm her everything and go in with the mindset you suggested?

You’re such a buffoon. There’s no way this ends well you beta faggot. Don’t throw your life away for s girl, it won’t work out.

Maybe? We don't really have plans to marry until a few more years. There's an age gap (I'm older), a culture gap, and likely an income gap eventually.
To be honest, the more I list the harder it is to say this is a good idea. But, I have no way of expressing this to her. I'm her everything, she's younger than I am so she might still have that mentality of "love wins in the end". Which I think is a little naive, especially with how I been feeling but I really don't have a good reason to give her should I decide to call it quits. She has pretty much stated that she wants to try, and if things get rocky that she would want to work at things.

I don't know why I'm wary if all this. Too many unknowns? Or am I just looking for reasons to chicken out?

Hey user; a lot of people in this thread are being pretty unhelpful. In my opinion, you can ignore anyone who unironically calls you a "beta".

I was in a situation that had some similarities to yours a little while back. A woman I'd been in an LTR with for about 2 years moved across the country so we could be together. in October of last year she had been living in my city for 2 years, but was having trouble making friends and wanted to move back out to her home state.

This is turning into a bit of a blog but bear with me. She asked me to come with her when she moved back, and I ended up refusing. This wasn't because I didn't see a future with her or because I was being "alpha", but because moving out there isn't something I was could see myself doing if she wasn't in the picture.

TL;DR, take a little time to reflect on your reasons for moving; do you think you can be comfortable in another part of the country? Can you still keep in contact with friends and family? And do you see a future with her?

just go for it, yeah it could be a total disaster but you really have nothing to lose imo

better than the alternative of not knowing what could've been and basically being back in the same place you are right now

The more I search my feelings the more I feel I should have broken up with her before things got this far. I look at my entries for my journal. Mostly negative, mostly about me putting out her fires. If this was only a 6 months to a year thing, I think I would have left. To be honest my trips where kinda because she was either super stressed or on the point of breaking mentally. And most of the trips I spent them taking care of her poor health, or satisfying her needs. I remember on my second trip I was so worn out that I ended up holding one of her dogs and crying when she was passed out from being sick.

If I bring this up, she'll tell things get better. That trying is on the future not the past, so why shouldn't we give it a shot? That I'm her everything and she'll go get help with me around because she trusts me to take care of her when her anxiety gets the best of her. That she didnt think it was hurting me and that i should have told her all this. I see this all coming.
Why didn't I tell her all this? Because I was scared of pain and hurting someone I care about. It's hard to say if I love her. The word feels empty when I say it.

I'm fucked up for letting it go on and even giving her hope that things will get better. Fuck. Why?

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Hey user, here. This sounds kind of similar to what I experienced in the relationship from my post; the only major difference being that it took until after the breakup for me to realize it.

These kinda things happen; don't beat yourself up. We sometimes stick with people because we care about them an awful lot, enough that we're not willing to admit that it isn't really love. I was so stressed out on one of my trips to California that I actually went home early, believe it or not.

You're not fucked up for letting things go on; I bet if you look back, there's a lot of times you were really believing things would get better in time. Hell there's still the possibility that it'll happen; but I know what it feels like to be worn down by a stressful relationship, it's tiring, and you know people have made it through these sorts of things before, but that doesn't mean you have to stick it out and wait forever.

I'm not trying to force your opinion one way or the other, and I'm sorry if it comes off like that. What I'm trying to say is I understand how you're feeling, and that you're not as bad as you're telling yourself.

I wonder where you came from. I'm from California and headed to FL to visit her. That's the thing, the last trip which was like 3 weeks ago (it feels like it has been a while since) she kinda just controlled me a lot. All the time she wanted to be held, at night to cuddled. If I wanted to just sit and watch a YouTube video to relax she didn't quite liked it and wanted me to hold her. Her explination being that she was just overly excited to spend time with me. A few days in i was missing home, but the end of it I was feeling guilty that I wanted to leave her. The other two trips I wanted so badly to stay.
Yeah, I wanted things to get better, but she would kinda just sink. She has really bad anxiety, to the point that she runs away from medical situations. Thus her getting help is an ordeal on its own, with me being so far away it doesn't make thing easier. I think that might be why we speed up plans to move in together. I think I was doing it for her more than myself. I feel like I would be fine without her, she on the other hand has pushed everyone away except for me. I'm all she has and I feel worse by the thought of abandoning someone I care about. Someone that I might love. She has it set that things will get better if I give her a chance, that she'll try to get better mentally. This is what I wanted from her for more than a year, why do I not feel good about all this? That it took us coming to nearly breaking up is what I feel caused her to talk this way, but I have dealt with her roller coaster ride before. She sinks then floats for a little while after I pull her out.
I don't want to abandon her, but my happiness is not guaranteed.

Sorry maybe I need to think or just some wisdom. A part of me want to just see if I can enlist with the army again and disappear. I'm not that old and broke yet.

>"Anyone been in this situation or similar that can offer advice, maybe some stories? Good or bad."

>meet girl online
>we're pretty similar
>talk for a few years and exchange pics
>she finally comes to visit for a week and we don't hit it off immediately, but we start to grow on each other
>her second visit we decide to move in together
>have a kid a few years later
>get married
>have another kid

>"Also how did you deal with being lonely and the need for actual affection?"

Fapped to her pics until she got here.

I envy you user. Congrats on making it work.

I'm currently on the phone with her, she's sick. Making weak little sounds, and it's making me think if maybe I pity her more than love now.
I don't think pity is enough to go on.

It was pretty easy to make it work considering we both wanted the same thing ever since meeting online. We both wanted to start a family because we both came from dysfunctional families ourselves and so we both set out to make it happen.