Female Looking For Intolerably un-fun Stick In Mud

This is probably going to sound really fucking bone-headed but HERE I GO

At one point in life I wanted a guy who plays vidya, has at least one non-fragile bone in their body, hasn't been fucking feminized and struck retarded by tap water, can speak on their own, and doesn't secretly want me to be their mommygf

I have since completely given up on this, as it was too tall an order so far.

Now I just want to know how to find someone moderately serious. Straight-laced, someone with a figurative stick up their ass. A human ":|" that wouldn't mind me being the opposite.

I seem to only attract feminine goofballs with a sense of humor. The rare few times I've located the mudstick, they seemed confused as to why I was speaking with them and I couldn't even seal the deal and keep consistent contact. I'm willing to chase pretty hard if they're introverted and be the one to start topics, but it feels like even the opportunity only comes once a blue moon.

Where do y'all spot tense, hard-headed dudes with bedtimes and dry personalities? How do you keep them pinned down or coming back? If you know someone personally like this, what moves them? what do they enjoy? What gets them responsive enough to start a friendship, god forbid a relationship?

Advice, anecdotes, contactfagging, scolding, criticisms, I don't care: go for it. I'm lonely enough to even just listen to your experiences with people like this.

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I have a friend like that, he takes his uni and job very seriously. Likes hiking and music, gets upset when he's the only one on the team that knows the pro strategies for whatever game we're playing. That kind of guy?

I now know why laid I don't get. Too feminine. Not enough of a cunt. Need to grab them by the pussy.

>"At one point in life I wanted a guy who plays vidya, has at least one non-fragile bone in their body, hasn't been fucking feminized and struck retarded by tap water, can speak on their own, and doesn't secretly want me to be their mommygf"
Sounds like me. I assume that people like me would be similar and you won't really find us on the street. Social media and dating apps are memes, bars and clubs are for degenerates, we only really stick to our friends circle. DESU just gotta be lucky or hope they have an extroverted hobby or two to find us in the wild. I met my girlfriend at a party that neither of us wanted to go to but our friends pushed us to go.

god yes, especially if they played video games.

I have even downloaded EVE online trying to find people like this, but I can't seem to stay awake long enough to touch base with some adorable little faggot that finds spreadsheets in space entertaining.

I wouldn't say that: My female friends adore guys like that, and moreover they seem downright appalled at my tastes. It's just my comfort zone, around people like that is where I feel safest expressing myself.

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>I want Chad
cool, try going outside sometime

Go to parties and comb the corners for wallflowers. I shall attempt to use this, thank you!

Nice bait, but chads fancy themselves conversationalists, fun, seductive, and humorous. The type of person I'm talking about would have been more likely to be a school shooter than on the football team.

I feel like u are somebody i know. Eurofag by any chance?

Ok, well if hes the guy heres your best bet:
His life is organized around his obligations and he doesnt seem that into people mixing events so you're probably going to meet him through work or mutual friends. Keep that in mind because you're probably going to have to ask him out during or after work/group assignments/whatever. You're going to have to be self confident and persistent because A: he probably doesnt expect you to be interested in him and B: you'll have to date around his timetable. Once you've got a date or two go for safe ones. You'll both have an easier time if its something straight forward like coffee. Try to talk i guess, remember you can always default to work/uni if the conversation breaks down, then try to work back to more interesting/personal topics. Oh and if he has my kind of autism expect him to get caught in the details of an idea and end up explaining it in a booring way. Try not to go full manic pixie dreamgirl gf right away or he wont be able to relate. Hope this helps.

Amerifag of Clapistan. But between this and , clearly i have to go to another continent. Hope the guys there like bad accents and skillet cornbread.

Ha you seem like a girl i am trying to get with in euro. The thing is i have the backbone against my friends and everything but i just am not sure what step to take with this girl, she talks to me but just doesnt seem romantically interested.

I even met her and spent 4 hours together, but god damn i have butterflies thinking about it..

>I even met her and spent 4 hours together, but god damn i have butterflies thinking about it..

I don't think you're the person she's looking for. You're putting pussy on the pedestal.

OP, I'm a lot like the guy you mentioned in the post. I'm gonna keep it real: we don't want to be bothered.

I am much more focused on my studies (going to PhD program next fall) and I don't really give a fuck about random girls desu. I don't like human interaction generally unless I am talking about something I really like such as my research interests. I'd advice you look for a different archetype.

Damn, this is good advice, especially the manic pixie dream girl thing. Maybe I've been spooking/annoying people with the bounciness.

I can definitely sit there and listen to a guy go on and on monotonely about the finer aspects of item builds. No need for grandiose expressions of interest if he commits to his obligations, that's more than enough in a world of flakes.

But finding him via work will be a challenge for me. I occasionally do clerical work and micro-work when I'm not doing graphic design, so most people around me are the loud caliswag hustler designing skateboard decal type of people that like beanbags at their places of employment.

I wonder if I can sneak into a random office building gathering and swiggity swooty my way into some programmer's heart before security catches me

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You sound exactly like my friend and thats exactly why you're wrong. You're going to be in your 30s by then, the dating pool has declined and lets be honest you're not taking as good care of your health as you should be. A relationship isnt a burden, its good for your emotional wellbeing and personal development, and you should never put off trying to find a good one.

I like this girl though, this is not about pussy.

It might be about me being a bit pussy on our "meeting" , shit...

I just didnt want to fuck up.

Fuck off mate you don't know me.

Given that people get out of graduate programs in their late 20s (gonna be 27 for me), I say it's substantially different than what you are saying. Some people prioritize their careers and that's fine. These people tend to also be kind of picky in the dating pool--also fine--so I'm not sure the relevance of the "decline" you mention.

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If you cant meet through work try getting an autismo hobby and meeting them through a dicord server. I cant think of any other way if your work and social networks dont have any... try monster hunter actually, it seems actually fun and its full to bursting with spreadsheet fags. Good luck op!

Don't worry, my overly-pragmatic little Adonis. I'll listen to those research interests all day long.

Hot up a construction site.

I don't literally mean you're all about sex. I moreso mean you're overthinking females. If you like one another stop being autistic and just ask her on dates or what she's up to or enjoy things you both like together etc etc.

That's a cringe from me.

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Do you get chills from cringe? Because I'd be happy to rock your-- ok wow maybe my desire to gain the mudstick's ire is a counterproductive aspect of my approach that I hadn't considered

Are you OP? If so, I'd advise you to relax a lot lol. Just go with the flow and I'm sure you'll be happy.

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before I read any farther, were you joking about the tap water thing? because I don't have high standards but "the jews are putting fluoride in the water supply to turn us into cattle!" is way past it.

Maybe you need to stop trying so hard. Just like women, men can smell a desperate woman and no one wants someone who's desperate and just looking to get laid. Start trying to make friends with people and see how that works. After all, the best relationships are built on a strong friendship. If you don't want to put the work in, just hit tinder and become an FWB because that's all you'll be worth.

"Put the pussy on the pedestal" means that you are idealizing her to an unrealistic level. Please understand that she is a human being with strengths and faults just like you.
She is not a Goddess

I would definitely a desperate woman though. I would make sure to wait a little while before sex if I really thought she was just looking for sex, but that doesn't seem so common with women.

these comments are just sad mi amigo

You are on Jow Forums, what were you expecting, the Talented Tenth?

Yes, it's a joke.

Implying someone is going through some hermaphroditic transformation because they drink from the faucet seems to antagonize in all the right ways, though I should probably be reeling the reigns in a bit on seeking negative attention.

I miss this meme. Haven't seen it in a while.

BAIT
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Look theres only so many good so's to go around. Random diffusion will see the stable pairs of good so's quickly pair off unitll its mostly unstable people all hunting the few good so's left in the pool, and you're going in with 0 experience. At least be open to meeting people, you're throwing away a decade of time. Thats 10 full years your perfect partner can come and go in because you where too busy studying...

But I don't think these data pools are as fluid as you make it seem to be. Assortative mating is a definite thing that is happening and it's happening more frequently.

I have no academic background for dating, but i think it stands to reason that as stable relationships form and dont decay the ratio of stable partners to psychotics declines. Regardless, dating is good an it is good for you and you should try to do it

This post describes me to a T

What would you like to know?

judging by the first standards you were looking for, it seems like the only standard you dropped was liking video games. what does 'secretly looking for a mommygf' even mean?

I'd want a mommygf but I don't want a girl who seeks out a specific archetype that happens to match me well. That's creepy.

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Out of the top 10 most ommon search terms on pornhub, last year had mommy, milf and stepmom in the top 5 for straight men. For context, gays had asian, korean and japanese. Now whos more degenerate?

interesting, but what exactly does it MEAN? are there any specific traits you don't want men to want in you?

Did you not read the thread? Good thing she didn't ask for intelligence LOL

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I have a bedtime and dry personality. I can’t be that unique

I read the thread.
Literally describes me 100%.

When i played WoW (during burning crusase and wotlk) i had profitability spreadsheets to track my tailoring profession monies.

When i played League of Legends, i made calculators for my champs using spreadsheets.

I dont play many games nowadays because im focused on my job. I now make ~100k in software development applying the same analytical skillset to business problems.

I have a relatively dry and corny sense of humor thats hard to tell when im joking. But that deadpan humor is exactly what makes it funny to some.
Im also brutally honest and always wear my heart on my sleeve so people know wherw i stand.
I hate wasting time...time always has been and will continue to be my most precious resource.

I dont have autism.
I have always been very passionate towards the things i love doing and the people i love.

Turns out i was diagnosed with bipolar...so my emotions are extra sensitive at times (i.e. can be manically happy/in love and can get VERY depressed if people i love dont treat me right).

Let me preface this by saying I'm not offering myself up because fuck meeting people on the internet.

I'm kind of that guy. I used to play video games when I was younger, I still do, sort of, but between work and "obligatory" social functions I don't really have time.

I went to college, but work a blue collar job because I find it more satisifying, I keep my apartment neat and ordered, try to organize regular outings to maintain my sanity, resent the idea of dating someone who thinks they need to be babysat, and am outright HORRIFIED by the idea of dating someone who thinks they need to babysit me. I'm a fucking adult and can take care of myself, thanks, please stay in your lane.

Honestly, as someone like that... I like intelligent conversation, independence, confidence, and a sense of personal awareness. Someone who knows who they are and is okay with it, and just wants to live their life with someone else.

As to how to find them, fuck if I know, I'm fucking terrible at meeting women, because hitting on a stranger just seems inappropriate and all my female friends are dating.

Also....my friends in HS (im 31 now) used to call me stickupass.

I have a very mechanical/stiff walk. Actually...its a quirk that I very much overthink/analyze EVERYTHING. Not because i want to....i just do.

The reason my walk seems so "unnatural(?)" at times is because im literally thinking/concentrating on how to walk. Excercise helps a bit with the physical coordination....however, once i start thinking about my walking, it makes it hard to walk (which makes me think about it more).

In general, i tend to be very terse and poised. At nearly all timed, it feels like I have to make an active effort to do pretty much everything...even mundane shit.
Sometimes i even find myself short of breath and notice i am breathing shallow....fix it my manually taking deep breaths.

But this hyperfixation/analytical talent helps in alot of ways. Thats why i make the big bucks now.

When my IQ was tested many years ago, it was 130 (surpassed the valedictorian of my school). But academics/school wasnt fun to me. Was considered a lazy slacker in school.

Still graduated HS with A's because i took AP and college enrollment courses (gave a letter grade boost). Teachers always thought i was cheating in school because i NEVER did homework yet still managed to get high 90s on tests.

>A human :| that wouldn't mind me being the opposite
You realize that, by virtue of being a :|, they will have problems with you being the opposite...???
Fuck me sideways.

A bipolar guy with a corny sense of humor and wears his heart on his sleeve is not what she asked for. At all. Try desperately somewhere else

Thanks for your service thread police. You prottected the wamen and made Jow Forums a better place.

Not true.

I am
My face is always in some form of :| or :/
Pic related (circa 2011...little has changed)

My ex-gf (of ~5years all through college) was very bubbly and "cute". She was always clinging onto me, jumphugging me (jump on me and wrap legs around), and in generall showed a ton of affection. It balanced me well and very much helped me to stop overthinking things and just go with the flow/enjoy myself.
She definitely helped me get out of my shell a bit. We kinda went out separate ways though (grew apart).

My wife is more of a "modern woman" type (multiple sex partners before me, focused on education and work, emotionally reserved/unavailable, etc). Shes generally is always super stressed about work or school (PhD).
Our intimacy in the bedroom is bascially dead, and most days she comes home to immediately vent/dump on me all the bad stuff that happened to her during the day.
I listen to her because it supposedly helps her to destress (though all research says that venting actually causes you to relive the stress).
Makes me stressed out and think about work.

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Just helping you out, man. Instead of falling in love with the idea that some girl out there wants someone like you, you now know that she actually wants someone who is not like you at all.

you're welcome.

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Im married and dont care at all about trying to get with some e-girl off of Jow Forums (probably a dude anyways).

Im merely stating that i match the criteria and saying that i am open for questions if there are any. Perhaps it will help OP snag her man.

Dude I've only read the few posts you've put in this thread and you strike me as one of the weirdest motherfuckers I've ever met.

The fact that you're married makes my own status as a single man seem both criminal and fantastically upsetting, and I'd like to thank you for confronting me with that, you strange, strange motherfucker.

And all that being said, you're STILL not what OP was talking about so please stop trying to die on this hill.

Lol, why would you call on OP to ask you questions when she laid out questions for you to answer?

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Still here...ill go ahead and answer these from my standpoint.

>Where do y'all spot tense, hard-headed dudes with bedtimes and dry personalities?
Unfortunately...at home. Dont really care for socializing, so bars arent their scene.
Maybe the gym.
To get in shape...you need the following...a schedule/routine (dedicated workout time), discipline (diet), stubborn (literally beating yourself up using metal weights repeatedly), and good rest/bedtime (for recovery)

>How do you keep them pinned down or coming back?
Dont distract or make the man feel like he is "sacrificing" what he wants to do to be with you. Accomodate the man's schedule...this will make him feel like he has it all (king of the world). This will also make the man more confident which in turn makes him more attractive to you.
Be a light of happiness in their world. Make them genuinely happy to be around you.
Give good sexxytime that keeps em coming back.

>If you know someone personally like this, what moves them?
Hunger for challenge and accomplishment.

>what do they enjoy?
Winning, self-improvement, and/or the thrill of the hunt.

>What gets them responsive enough to start a friendship, god forbid a relationship?
Finding someone who they feel is worth their time. The person has to add to their life somehow (make them more complete as a unit).

I have so much more to share though...

My life is like one big cringe compilation where somehow things turn out ok-ish in the end.

Biggest brotip.

Get in shape. Now
Its like carrying 300k on you at all times.

Before my real job, i was working part-time at best buy/geek squad.

Had lots of time on my hands, so rode bike, went to gym, and grocery shopping in freetime.

Got jacked in less than 6 months.

My wife bascially ignored my previous advances until we met up at the anime con.
I was cosplaying as Ace (pic related)
Snuck back to room when the 8 roomies were out. Had sex on roommates bed when they werent there. Had sex again in shower when all roommates were there (we were no doubt pounding on the walls/they knew).

Wife bascially moved in immediatly after the convention, 6 months later we were engaged. 4 years later, married.
Life is strange

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OMG I want a gf...

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If you're on Jow Forums you're retarded.

You don't want a permanent dick around, sis. Make bank and live free.

The major reason i started to visit Jow Forums back in 2004 was because it was anonymous.

It was the only place (as a cosplayer at the time) to get honest-to-god and brutal feedback on costumes.

Everyone on cosplay.com was too
concerned about reputation and trying not to offend others.

Skip to today (~15 years later)....the number of boards has grown, but the major draw of Jow Forums remains the same...the ability to post and interect with people who will tell you how they really feel without holding back.

Authenticity and little to no filter

I respect this more than anyone could imagine.

What exactly is weird or strange?

I assure you there is a rationalization or method behind the madness.

Maybe the strangest thing is that i am somehow opersting in this culture/environmemt and do not conform to a majority of its rules and "proper process...yet somehow, ive found a niche were i excel pretty well.

Tangent*
This interaction here is remeniscent of my interactions with people all through HS and college.
At one point, a girl tried to "glomp" me at the anime club meet. I was cosplaying as Heero Yuy. She literally chased me though the auditorium until she got ahold of me (grabbed my arm). My reaction to her was simply to look at her with a much disdain as i could muster and say "release my arm" as steely and coldly as possible. To which she did, and i walked away

After i got into the workforce, people began to respect me for my capabilities and shrugged off the social awkwardness (its an "user thing".....is typically said when my eccentric social behaviors and thought processes are called out).

Tell us more, user.

Why did you move so fast in your relationship? Less than a year from dating to marriage is pretty atypical.

From the moment she walked into the store, i knew she was the one

I had hundreds of girls come up to the counter before (some offer their numbers even). But for her, my heart skipped a beat and had butterflies in stomach

She brought her comp in for repairs/upgrades.
On desktop.
Wrath of the Litch King and a shortcut to /b/

I spent an insane amount of time "fixing her computer" really just talking.
Got her number, called her up. Went out to go eat. Back to her place to resume troubleshooting
We even went out to a dinner to talk.
Loved everything about her. Smart, driven, dry sense of humor, gets my jokes/references, politically compatible, religiously compatible, absolutely beautiful, to me....a complete knockout.
We had just gotten out of relationship and knew exactly what we were looking for in a partner

Talked a bit through text, made my intentions clear. She wasnt ready to enter a relationship at the time. We both stopped talking to each other

Months later,she comes back in. Was interested in giving me a shot/now emotionally available. We go on a date to wine bar+food. After the meal/wine, we sit on bench outside, her head in my lap. I look down at her lips and decide "fuck it..might aswell". Kissed her, she kissed back

Drove back to my apartment, made out against car. Barely made it in with our cloths on. *initiate sexxytime*


After this, she kinda ghosted me for a while. She was hanging out with her beta orbiters. Couple months passed, convention happens (June 2011)

Shes ready to commit.
She leaves the convention with me, stays at my place since then

Nov 2011, get engaged infront of her Mecca with a custom designed handmade 1-of-a-kind golden snitch ring.

Planned to get married soon after, but life shit on me
-dad died
-grandmother died
-inherited multiple properties in state of direpair
-responsibilities at work growing from new promotions

Things finally settled down. Got married in vegas in 2015. Small event with just immediate family

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I think you need a clearer idea. You seem like you want a authoritarian boyfriend. One who is emotionally stable a bit of a chad and has a red foreman kind of outlook.

If that's the case you aren't gonna find em here. Lots of femboys and wannabe chads. Hell im androgynous biologically. Get a discord and post on discord threads. cause if you beg for dick on Jow Forums they'll make fun of you despite them probably being your type since a lot of them larp as soldiers or tacti-fags.

best of luck.

women actually like boring guys who just work, barely converse, and keep to themselves? Boy that gives me hope.

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Yeah i dont think she likes me back the way i like her. I might have one more shot at this, after that i might not have the chance to see her for months.

Oh i am aware of her faults and strengths, i know she is not perfect. But i like her with her everything, faults and all..


Is it true that a girl decides if she likes you or not in the first moments she meets you? I understand relationships maybe formed through friendships but if whe already she might not be interested?

Go to your local games workshop/ tcg store. There is friday night magic in some of them I believe. Should be plenty nerdy guys there. And magic is fun to play casually.

Dont listen to what they say, watch how they act.

Bamp

Literally described me.

If you like kinky sex and would be up for watching a movie or go for a walk occasionally, that's all.

Everyone in this thread:

>pick me
>no pick me
>you literally described me

Hahah fucking hell, well girl, I am like that, and I know more dudes like me, videogames are meh, sometimes I play, you don't find us anywhere because mostly we stick to our friend crews and some of us have just given up on love because we got fucked or we're just too fucking busy with our personal projects and having a relatioship would seem like the death of it all, a girl requires time, money, things that I could be using for my projects. The feminized thing is meh too, we have tons of feelings, way more than the average guy I'd say, it's just that we don't fucking trust you with those feelings because we don't want you to perceive us as weak which is bullshit. Ideally I wouldn't want a relationship like that, I would want us to be able to help & understand eachother because I want us to be a solid team to deal with life, which takes a girl with brains and some life experience. That you will not find at a club or a bar or a party. I guess people like that life brings together you can't really go look for someone like that.

I said nothing about picking. But yeah, guys like us are common and many are desperate. OP can't really be trying, or they're perhaps a terrible person or ugly, we don't know that.

You in Texas?

Guys like that died in World War II, or are so rich they will not deal with the common peopel

Same guy as
Has kinda the right idea.

Not necessarily. Once again...myself being one of them.
I have a decently large (~12) collection of vintage rifles. Oldest is from 1895. Most are from WWI-WWII. A couple of cold war era rifles.

I used to be ultra dark/moody growing up. I purposely put out an air of "F off" because i simply didnt (and still dont) want to put up with people. Interacting with people is exhausting and generally dont care for it.
Was continually called a schoolshooter type growing up.

I think a good place to check/scope out some potential guys would actually be a gunshow and/or the shooting range! Just ask a guy you like to help you out (i.e. say you know nothing about guns and would appreciate some assistance).
Might want to check Jow Forums to see what good guns are. This way you can avoid guys with shit/pleb-tier tastes.

Jow Forums occassionally has meetups...may want to lurk to see if there are any in your area.

Maybe try making a thread there for starters to see if you like the culture associated with it.

i have taken this advice and am now lurking several chat servers. Fortunately I know enough about all of these topics to hold in-depth conversations about all of them. Here's hoping he's out there and I can actually bait him into a full convo that doesn't turn up to be a single phrase response!

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Join a few so you appear to have the same dedication, I don't think they'd date a casual. Just beware, authoritarian guys aren't Angels.

.t mom dated a marine who didn't respect her and cheated on her.