Im a social worker from germany specializing in treating life crises

Im a social worker from germany specializing in treating life crises.

Hit me with 'em

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How do I outrun being CWC-tier infamous online and in my hometown

Not actually a life crisis but something i have been battling my whole life.

I pick my skin and it‘s not pretty. Basically my whole body is scarred because of this. I often dig till it bleeds and it has a huge imapct on how i dress, if i can go out of the house, my confidence, my sex life and so on.

I‘m in psychotherapie and on ssri‘s. My depression is better but the picking won‘t get better.
I‘ve found some triggers and try to have emergency plans to get trough the situations withou picking or with minimal picking.
But it still happens. All. The. Time.
More than once a day. I pick my whole body from head to toes.

My therpist‘s approach is to avoid triggers, have backup plans and then power trough the urges. Problem is that i‘m always ceumbling in the face of the urge.

How tf do i get stronger? I want to be in charge again and tell my fingers to leave my skin the fuck alone!

And why on earth does it feel so good? It physically hurts and it definitelly hurts after i get out lf my trace-like state. But it is so immensely relieving, nothing can really replace it.

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The way, lets call it that way, mobbing works is that is always targets something you cant change about yourself. Simply said (and I know everyone heard this a million times) is to own your flaws, everyone has those.

If your personality is one alike to chris-chan and you are not happy with that, you should consider behavioural therapy or gather self-experience outside of your comfort zone (is it harmful?).

my boyfriend's mother is a literal nutjob. like she is the worst I've ever seen. Total Wahnsinniger. she calls him and screams at him for absolutely no reason. tells him she never wants to see him again, he's no longer her son, etc. even though he's never done anything to deserve this. she has a consistent pattern of being nice and then turning into this monster. he and I live on the east coast and she lives on the west coast. sometimes he goes to visit her and his dad. his dad is a surgeon and is too busy to give a flying fuck about this.

we're in the US so I know you can't help with checking her into a loony bin or anything, but do you have any strategies to help him deal with this?

herzlichen Dank

It's something I did over a decade ago. I've lived in isolation since.

I'm 31. I'm a closeted gay guy, never did anything with anyone. My family are very anti-gay and that made me not come out. I've lived at home for many years now, and I've become increasingly introverted and blocked off emotionally. I have a boring admin job that I hate, and I am likely a bit depressed.

I don't show this much. Outwardly, I'm just a bit of an unsociable angry prick.

I dunno. I don't know what my life even is. I'm pretty lonely, I don't think I'll ever have the courage to come out, and I'm drifting. Dead end job, living with my parents in a rural area, no social life, no enjoyment. All my friends are moving on - getting married, having children. It fills me with jealousy and sadness, because I'll never have any of that.

I could move away, sure. But what then? Sharing an apartment with strangers, even lonelier than before. I have never even kissed anybody, how could I even begin to be romantic with anyone with the sexual maturity of a 12yo boy?

I dunno, I'm in good health, in decent shape, I have money to support myself - I'm not that badly off. I'm just... not happy.

tell us who u r

Tried just moving to another town? Doesn't sound like you have anything specifically keeping you around that one place

Problem with this one is, that I don't know about you. Kudos for seeking professional help.

It's not so much about being strong or weak, much more about the way your brain is wired. You picking your skin is a deeply rooted ritual/habit. Habits can be maintained, broken and replaced. Maybe delve into the topic; why is this so deepy satisfying? Is this akin to self-harm? Is it cleaning yourself? Is it energy (negative one at that, which builds up in stressful situations) that you only know to release by executing said ritual. Does running like hell until your legs or lungs hurt do for you? You are best suited to provide those answers. I'd ask for behavioural therapy.

I wish you the best of luck, you had the power to go to therapy and I'm sure you will come to realize which thinking and which patterns do the most for you.

Guten Abend,
firstly I can relate to this a lot. I've had a father with cirrhosis (which affected his mental state a lot). He'd get angry for no reason or lose his temper about nothing and wouldn't be able to have a real dialogue.

Has she been diagnosed? Is she suffering from any sickness? Is she able to otherwise be "normal" in everyday life?

Until anything is known, your bf is confronted by the unknown. Best thing he can do is find acceptance in himself for the situation and the way his mother is. It will be next to impossible to act in a constructive way by not having a clue whats up.

10+ years of isolation does something grave to ones mind and mental patterns. You gotta realize that you got one hell of a process in front of you. Not for the sake of others or society, but for yourself.

Whats best for you?

Can YOU do it?

No point in living a life you're not satisfied with. But accelerating from the shit hole to a point where you wake up satisfied will be the best feeling you will ever experience.
Remember it's not too late for anything, everybody moves in their own pace.

The answer to why people are unhappy whilst having everything they need to survive is because they are fundamentally uprooted from what they really are. This is not only about sexuality, but about your very quintessence as a human. You don't live everyday life as taught by your instincts, you don't eat as taught by your instincts, you don't sleep, move think or feel as taught by your instincts. You probably breathe into your chest instead of breathing into your stomach as your instincts once taught you.

When dealing with clients that have a similiar situation to yours (feeling trapped in their situation and in the identity they had to adopt to fit their social/economic surroundings) the best they can do is force themselves into new situations with completly different settings.

If you have nothing to lose and bring up the little money and the little courage to do it, take a look at and see if you can work anywhere. Maybe in the U.S first and then whereever the fuck your desires take you. Be it the maroccan sahara or San Francisco.

Good luck with everything. You've filled your glass with all the loathing, lack of acceptance, hatred etc. you've faced in your life. Maybe it's time to spill the entire thing.

Thanks for the advice.

It's frustrating - logically I know the steps I should take to get out of my situation, I'm not an idiot. But it's very hard to take those steps in reality!

How dumb do you think I am?
I have a job here and my surviving family, also the only friends I have left. I dont think I'd be able to start again elsewhere.

I'm in my mid twenties and only relied on online dating for romantic pursuits. It's not like I'm socially autistic though because I work as a bartender and can conversate relatively easy. Do you know any reason why I find people online more attractive than the people I meet IRL?

The best thing you can initially is to empower yourself so you're not passively standing by looking at your life being pissed off.
Maybe a certain person, a movie, a song, a quote or a (psychedelic) drug or some random bullshit of a event will flip the switch in your brain. So you can finally take action, be active, be aware. That's what it means to take responsibility of your life. Until you haven't taken responsiblity of that, don't expect to be able to take responsibility for anything more complicated, be it the entire world or just another person you try to spend the rest of your life with.

I don't know you. Thus I can't provide you with answers. Best advice I can give here is to ask yourself as many questions as you can, maybe write them down even. Then you can start working on answers that work in ways that benefit you more than the current act you're pulling off.

I have a job here and my surviving family, also the only friends I have left.

>Is that a environment that empowers me?

If the answer is no, you should seek to leave those confining walls of yours physically, mentally and socially otherwise you might end up dying without ever enjoying this life you have.

Hi, this is might seem trivial and shallow, and even stupid, but my life is complete shit right now and I really need some help.

I am 23 depressed male. I live in white country in Europe. I have asian grandparents, so I have asian eyes and I am not attractive overall. My father(his father is asian, but he looks white) is white supremecist and my whole childhood I have been listening how he says that white people are superior and other races are fugly and should be kept out white countries. I have never talked with him about it, but this is what he said to other people when I was around. My mother wasn't so hateful, but she hated most people just because most people are assholes in her eyes. They both were very abusive, but never physically.

My problem is I am a virgin and I am getting old. I don't know how to talk to women, most my time I spent alone at home. I fucking hate myself, everything about my face fucking despise. I want to become a full-on recluse and leave house just to buy groceries. Is it pathetic? Or it is the most realistic outcome for me?

Is this thread still up?

I'm a 22 year old American living in the Midwest. I was born into an isolationist Christian commune and live there right now. I don't really believe that what is taught here is true anymore. I really don't want to leave, all of my friends and family are members and would cut ties with me if I left, but I don't feel like I can really remain a part of the community either. I'm sure that I could fake it and get married and have a family if I tried, but I could never force my kids to have the same lifestyle that i was forced to have. I have major depression and am basically homeschooled; I have few job skills and little formal education. I would join the military if I could but my health history wouldn't let me. What would you do in this situation?

how do I find meaning in illusions?

Single male in my 30s. I have a job that keeps the bills paid. I've been talking to a girl regularly for the last few months, but she's been mostly absent the last 2 weeks.

I feel lonely, uptight, and irritable. Masturbating and intimate (not necessarily sexual) ASMR videos help. I have a deep need for cuddling. We still talk, but I need more intimacy, sexual and not. I'm going to give her a while, see if we settle back into routine, but if she keeps flaking, I'm gonna have to move on because I can't stand being in a cuddle-less relationship.

Between now and when I have to make that decision, what are some good ways to cope? From googling, it seems like I'm supposed to work on self care and clear out my to-do list, but those things feel doubly hard to do in her absence. It's almost like I can't do anything unless I'm in an intimate relationship. Is this healthy?


>be me
>Clinically depress
>considering suicide
>GPA 2.9
>most engineering students need a 3.0 to find job
>should I just end it?