How do you know if you're ready for a relationship?

How do you even know if you want a gf at all?

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Enough time has past that you feel emotionally available again. People that date constantly are called 'vapid'. If you have love at first sight then follow your gut cause at least you have something to work with there and will get something you actually want.

bump

ask yourself under what terms do you want to be around someone 70% of the time

Don't set getting a girlfriend as a goal, just live your life making sure to push yourself to do new things, and odds are it will just work out

Theres no magic formula, just enjoy your life

God, probably never.
I meet girls that like me probably a couple times a year, I just ignore them usually.

>I just ignore them usually
Don't in future then. Just see where it goes.

How do get past inferiority/unworthiness?

They showed interest, let yourself feel good about that in the moment and try not to think about where things may/may not go.

It's not so much if you want "a" gf, but rather if the woman is someone you can see yourself living with.

It's "the" gf that matters.

Not OP, but that's not what the purpoted "pussy slayer Chad" lifestyle is about, is it? What is that about, then? Is it just a hedonistic dead end? Do Chads even settle for homely gfs, full of past regrets, or do they look back and see glory days?

Chads only have a leaderboard in mind.

Pussy slayer Chad isn't a real thing, it's a one-dimensional character that Jow Forums dreamed up as some kind of bogeyman to rationalize their own intellectual superiority.

The "lifestyle" they used as a template was the curious university student that sleeps around because it's easy to do so in that setting.

"Chads" will end up with anyone, just like the rest. Maybe he settles. Maybe he finds a comely woman that has all the qualities he loves. There is no template for what you can and cannot want in a woman. Maybe he yearns every day for his old life, or maybe he's happy for every new day waking up with the wife he has. Maybe what he wants in a woman is obedience, maybe he wants a crazy bitch that gets him going.

If you want to talk about "Chad" lifestyles, it's simply an amorphous twist of the fact that some people bloom early in life, and some bloom late (and a few not at all).
I have a friend that bloomed early and did a lot of "Chad" things when he was 21-28, another that had his "Chad" period 27-34, and I did my "Chad" thing from 21-24 and then again 28-34. I was a nerd in school, played DnD and LAN parties during the weekends if that matters. Oh, and the usual things. I have an average penis, I'm tall, and I'm not rich.
Nowadays I get a lot of attention, girls walk up to me and ask me questions (usually about my height or age), and every now and then someone will slip me a napkin with a number, even though I usually start by mentioning I have a gf.

Furthermore, you can be quite hedonistic even with a gf.

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>Pussy slayer Chad isn't a real thing, it's a one-dimensional character that Jow Forums dreamed up as some kind of bogeyman to rationalize their own intellectual superiority.
It's not just Jow Forums though, you get to see party animal types all over the media. Even from my vicinity - I have a colleague that's like that except he's got a gf - that didn't stop him from flirting with another female colleague or showing his dick around like 10 other people from work when we went on a trip together. While his actual actions disgust me, I admire his courage, which is something that I would like to foster in myself.

Chad isn't about being fit or having money, it's about the bluntness and the courage. He wants nothing more than pussy, and he has no second thoughts about openly (or rather, very suggestively) asking for it. And it works surprisingly often. How come? But I never happened to find out where this Chad road leads, it's a great mystery to me.

What do you mean by blooming?
>played DnD and LAN parties
Those were social activities though. A lot of nerds actually shun that. Maybe that was your key.

>The "lifestyle" they used as a template was the curious university student that sleeps around because it's easy to do so in that setting.
What?
When I was a university student, it was nearly impossible to get a girlfriend. There were some who had a girlfriend before university and they kept theirs, one guy had a mental breakdown, took a year off studying and found a girlfriend, but he was the only one who did that.

Getting girls was certainly not common during my university experience.

Not OP, but curious in the same vein here... if you're not necessarily "ready" for a relationship (see that 70% of time with one person), how do you eventually get there?

I'm an only child who enjoys his hedonism and partying way too much, and I like a good chunk of alone time. But I'm 32 years old, 33 in a couple of months, and my opportunities to meet a girl, date a few years, get married and have kids, are dwindling.

But I don't want to force myself into something I hate, I genuinely want to change and find a way to enjoy life at a slower pace.

Then you went to the wrong school, dude. There's pretty much no more target rich environment than college. Everyone's hormones are still pumping, no one is supervised by their parents anymore... shit.

It is too late now.
But at university, everyone was divided by interests. Obviously you could talk to anyone, but you spend 10h / day studying, so it is natural to be social with the people you study with.
I am sure it was possible to meet women in a university, but I really hope it isn't the best place to meet women.

Who the fuck studies 10 hours a day?

I studied like maybe a week before an exam. Even with a part time job, I still had levels of free time and the ability to party like 3-4 times a week like I'll never have again in the real world.

Can't meet anyone in college? Good luck when you're stuck in an office 5 days a week and maybe get out once or twice a week.

>Who the fuck studies
Everyone did, if you didn't put in the work as a student, you would fail. If you could go through your education with 1 week of studying up to an exam, what value does it bring? You should have challenged yourself with something harder.

I studied 10h/day 5 days a week, worked 10h/week and I could easily fit a whole day and several evenings off to do things.
Right now, I work in an office, but given I only work 40h/week, I actually have a lot of time to go do stuff. I have events, hobbies and meetups 3 times during the week.

You studied something piss easy and irrelevant clearly.

If you want that courage, then why not do it? The key is to simply not care about what others think. Do it. It'll be embarassing, like the first time I went out on my own to the club. But the second time will be easier, and the third even more so. Nowadays (when gf-less) I prefer to go out alone if I want to pick up girls, it's easier when I don't have anyone to get in my way. Works pretty much every time too.
If you want that courage, you have to keep doing it. That's all there is. It's scary at first, but it will pass.

Yes, I guess all "Chads" just want pussy to start with, but that shit gets old quickly. It's a lot more rewarding to find that one pussy you really like, even out of bed, and then stick with that pussy.
The "Chads" that stay with the nothing but pussy approach are kind of sad.

I had 2 friends that I would always LAN with, and some 2-4 others that would sporadically show up. Same with DnD. I don't know if that qualifies as social, we were all pretty hardcore nerds.

Really? It wasn't possible to go to a single student event without running into girls for me.

It was a dudefest everywhere for me.
I think in retrospect, we should have dropped all the events aimed at university students and crashed some party for nurses or something.
5 years wasted.

What about the local pub? Local club? Nation/Frat pubs? They are all filled with girls.

If I go down to the closest nation pub right now, there will be at least 2 groups sitting there playing some game, cards or Settler's of Catan or whatever. I can say hi, sit down and start playing with just the barest of social skills. That's a pretty easy in for a new group of people to hang with. Same works at a frat, especially if you bring a beer or two.

Maybe a 75/25% split.
It is not like I didn't try. Towards the end, I had a lot of money, so I could often offer people to buy them drinks but it didn't work.

That works great for guys, I have not met any women who wanted me to sit down at their table. I often did anyway, but they just left soon after.

Holy shit that's an insane amount of studying. No, I didn't need to put that time in, not because my degree was worthless, but because I learned the material the first time, more or less, and didn't just flush it all out and forget it.

The ends justify the means, I make over $100k in a place where that actually matters.

All I needed was a simple brush up on the concepts and I'd go nail the exam. Kept my full-ride scholarship, too.

A 75/25 split is fine. Buying drinks is generally not a great idea though, it comes off as compensating. It's better to save that for the introduction at lounges/bars. If you want to keep things going though you can say that you're getting a pitcher and will need some help from the table to finish it.

I haven't met a woman that invited me to sit down either. I just say "Hi there, may I join you?". The only time I got a no on that was some 17 years ago when I was so drunk I had to lean on the table to stay upright. Anyhoo, after they say "sure" you introduce yourself, shake hands etc, and then (if they aren't in a discussion already) you say something like "so what do you guys do?" and then take it from there. Then after a few minutes you lead the discussion into things that you like, and try to match it with things they do and check how well they try to match themselves to what you like.

Also, if you want an easy way to stay social, look for the girls that are playing cards/games or stuff like that.

Also, if you want practice, why not sit down with the guys? It's a good way to expand your circle (and meet more girls that way) and it's a good way to practice the flow of conversation. You generally feel less self-aware with guys since you aren't trying to sex them, which in turn makes conversation easier.

>pic unrelated

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>Chad isnt real
>just be tall
And if you're not tall youre SOL right?

Do you want one or don't you.

You just said that Chad is imaginary and then went on to describe your subjective experience as Chad.
Here are the BARE MINIMUM requirements these days:
>be tall
>be outgoing
>be rich
>don't be bald
>don't have a small dick
>be ripped
honestly it's all so tiresome. At 26 I can't be asked to engage with women anymore. I have a bunch of health problems and I'm almost completely bald (started losing it 4 years ago), even though I was called handsome in the past I know it's pointless now.
I don't know how Chads keep it up desu. After a while it must get so exhausting dealing with these shallow whores.
Not even a virgin btw

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> BARE MINIMUM
Lol I pity you if you truly think this. The truth is, the men who legitimately have all of these traits represent 1-5% of the population, tops, depending on how strict your criteria for each category is. They all help, but it's possible to get a girlfriend with few or none of them.

You're describing what gay or closeted men such as yourself find attractive in men. Those are not the characteristics that define the men who are the most attractive to women.

would you ever consider joining a cult?

he's already a member of the cult of incels

Then what are they, genius?

Every woman has different tastes. But generally speaking, being confident and intelligent and funny is the combination that will get you the most girls. You on the other hand talk about "bare minimum" like an angry basement-dwelling incel who has never even held hands with a girl yet thinks he's an expert on women.

No, you don't have to be tall. Just look around. Are all guys with girlfriends tall? I see plenty of short guys around getting laid.

This just sounds like a defeatist attitude, trying to find an excuse for your situation.

No, I said you don't need any of those; the opposite of what you somehow interpreted.

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Yes, and why do you think you keep hearing that?

Sometimes I think I'm too much of a loner for a real relationship, but maybe I'm just depressed. I think about my life and go "Why would another person want to be a part of this?"

Beats me because the real me is a shit human being