Question mainly directed to femanons: why do you do this?

And when she points out what a creep he's being, he takes offense and claims he accepts her "No" when HE FUCKING NEVER DOES.

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Just be glad that she stopped pretending before the relationship got any farther and you got even more invested. And you might not get a good reading on someone until a while into the relationship. Some women tell you exactly what they're thinking, but others will lie to save your feelings, even if that actually makes things worse.
And don't listen to that other loser, he talks like a fag and his shit's all retarded.

More of the same. He does not respect her rejection.

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This isn't a female problem, it's a shitty person problem user. Just be glad you found this out on the first date

And this is why some women will tell you the bullshit you want to hear OP, because your filthy, shitty kind won't listen and leave you alone otherwise. Blame men for that. Have a nice day.

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How long ago was the date? Are you sure you’re not overreacting?
>e-whoring on instagram, liking other dude's pics, etc
Oh wait you definitely are. You sure you’re not hallucinating again buddy?

Well she fucked up. She was absolutely passive and the entire subject of the conversation was about her and what she doesn’t want or what he wants to give to her. The woman should have changed the subject to him. Examples are: How his behaviour is unacceptable. How does he think this is okay. How he is showing no sense of self-awareness. How he is going to get blocked. How his persistence is not backed by a noble goal such as defending his people or his honor, but rather focused on getting his dick wet and betrays the weak, thirsty beta within him that is holding him back from manhood.

then why not just block him and move on? why waste the time to reply to him? and how does this relate to telling someone super nice things, kissing all up on them and making them feel nice? why stroke their ego just to destroy it after the date? it seems really retarded to do those things to a guy. doing that seems especially counter-productive to your point because now you've got to deal with this guy who's built up all this interest in you, and more often than not, he's going to say even more irrational, weird things than if you hadn't shown him any interest at all. that doesn't make any sense to me whatsoever.

>others will lie to save your feelings
i could see this being a possibility, but this was our second date. clearly i did something right on the first date to make her like me enough to go on the second date, so i don't understand as to why she would feel the need to lie. would you really go as far as to make out with a guy you weren't really interested in, and kissing him goodbye just to "save his feelings"? she even hinted at things of a more sexual nature, though i was in no mood to do that with her on the second date. i'm thinking maybe it was because i didn't do anything sexual with her, but i think that's a really stupid and immature reason to break things off like this with someone.

this happened about a month ago, but it still fucking gets to me. she didn't really post on her Insta too often but literally days after our date, she's posting pictures and liking other dude's shit. then she hits me back up again after a couple weeks of not talking. i ask her if she wanted to go out again and i didn't get a definitive answer. just make up your FUCKING mind so i can either get over you, or expect to go on another date, i hate being in this grey area.

>she fucked up
No she did not.
She told him what she wants. She wants him to leave her alone. She doesn't want to be his friend, fuckbuddy or girlfriend.
He should have stopped at that. His fault he chose not to.
No,she shouldn't need to change the subject to make him listen. He should have listened immediately, period. She did good sticking to what she wanted and not getting dragged into more arguments about how she's wrong not to want him, when she is clearly right.
And she did show him how his behavior is unacceptable. Right here: and he ignores it.
>his persistence is not backed by a noble goal such as defending his people or his honor
Nobody cares for that bullshit. He's already shown he has no honor by not shutting up and going away at the first no.

>i didn't get a definitive answer. just make up your FUCKING mind so i can either get over you, or expect to go on another date, i hate being in this grey area.
You seem to be pretty inexperienced when it comes to dating, but mixed signals means a “no.” Don’t ever expect a girl to straight up tell you that they don’t want to see you again. Hate it and call it unfair and confusing all you want, but you need to learn that people don’t like confrontation and you will almost never get some final closure.

>why not just block him and move on?
Because men have the disgusting habit, when blocked, to stalk and harass women from a new account/number, and you keep making new account and new numbers just to torment the innocent. You have to be forced to accept your rejection or you won't shut up and go away.

Hello user. Before I begin, I’d like to state that I am a female in her early 20s. This does NOT just happen to men. This has happened to me quite often and it’s something you will never be able to avoid. I suggest you leave this girl alone. She does not seem interested, she just wants someone to have sex with or she wants to keep you around till she is ready for a relationship. One of these is possible. Let it go and find someone else.

It seems I have hit a nerve. Aight look at it this way, have you ever met a panhandler who wouldn’t go away and followed you a few blocks yelling in your ear to get your attention. How would you handle that? Apply that logic to thirsty dudes. Personally, I like to get in their face about it and shame em a bit. However, engaging in terse responses is still encouragement for that behavior.

I also think you should block her if you can’t stand her ignoring you. That’s the best way to let go of things if you are having trouble. Looking at it everyday will only upset you more and more and then you will say something you regret and end up looking like a thirsty douche.

>engaging in terse responses is still encouragement
>"No" is encouragement
>"I don't want to" is encouragement
>"I'm not interested" is encouragement
>"I'm not willing" is encouragement
Spoken like a true rapist.

I don't know how old you are but if you don't have much experience in this area then I'll clue you in; you've just had a run-in with an emotional tourist. Emotional tourists swing through town, have their fun, then wake up the next day and leave like nothing happened. The key to this is being able to acknowledge when this has happened and learn to pick up on the kinds of red flags these people throw up far in advance. Feeling wanted and bathing in concentrated amounts of intimacy for brief moments at a time is as much intimacy as people like this can take. Chances are she's desperately afraid of getting too close to people so she spends her days hopping from person to person, gathering as much validation and fuzzy feelings as she can then running away before things get too serious because while she's scared of being emotionally vulnerable she's also petrified of being alone. Emotional tourists, in fact, run away farther and quicker from people the more they like them. People they feel like they really like and could genuinely bond with present the greatest danger. Emotional tourists are inherently sad people. They'll never settle down. They'll never find peace. They will never have a place to call their home because, just like tourists, they only thing they can afford to do is visit. Even if she really liked you and wanted something deeper with you her deeply ingrained intimacy issues and fear of emotional vulnerability would not allow her to stay. I know you're pissed but do your best to learn from this. We've all been there. Boiling in bitterness whenever someone isn't capable of being the kind of person you need them to be is a giant waste of time and energy.

When a normal woman isn't interested she will give a reply or two and then just stop replying. The woman in these messages is enjoying the attention and power she has over him, and likely would fuck him if he could get her drunk because shes an attention whore.

>reject a guy directly
>he gets offended, starts stalking you, beats you to a pulp
>reject a guy indirectly
>he gets offended, starts stalking you, shits up Jow Forums again
>show men don't listen when women reject them
>some butthurt incel on Jow Forums pulls shit out of his ass to justify his bullshit worldview
Kill all men.

I feel as though she should have blocked him from once he started being persistent and this is coming from a woman by the way. I don’t understand why some women keep messaging and telling the guy no, no and no. Either block them or give them an ultimatum. Do not waste your time in continuously telling them what you don’t want.

>The woman in these messages is enjoying the attention and power she has over him,
Imagine being so retarded and delusional that after reading all of those text messages you still find some way to make it the woman's fault.

>he gets offended, starts stalking you, beats you to a pulp
Yeah this happens all the fucking time! God its so annoying like every other day I'm getting the shit beat out of me for saying no to a man.

I doubt you're a woman. If you were, you would have heard from other women how blocking abruptly only led to the incel stalking them endlessly through new numbers and new accounts demanding an explanation. When it's safe to do so it is better to make he understands that no is no, and gives up for good.

Jesus, why do you people even reply to trolls like this. Hook, line, and sinker.

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If women are so smart and men are just dumb fucking dogs maybe they should realize dragging a piece of roast beef in front of one is cruel.

Well, I guess my advice on how to handle it holds up to rapists too then. So you can either heed it, or suffer. Good luck, faggot.

>You seem to be pretty inexperienced when it comes to dating
i am, i'm only 18 and i'm fucking pissed because this is a girl who i've been interested in for a long time and i fucked it all up.

>mixed signals means a “no.”
understandably so, and i was already in the process of moving on from her, but then she hits me back. why the fuck would she hit me back if she didn't want to hang out again? i was at a point where i just took the loss and gave up, but then she hit me back the fuck up, leading me back into this bullshit again. she said the earliest we could hang out again is fucking July, so now i'm going to have this bitch on my mind until fucking July when i'll go to ask her out only to probably get rejected.

this is actually an interesting take on the situation, and one that i think is fairly accurate and applicable to my situation. actually reading something so directly applicable has actually calmed me down a bit, so thank you user. fuck, i wish she wasn't like this though, i know we could have been something, and as much as i'd like to think that it's partially my fault things didn't work out the way i wanted them to, this description seems fitting and now that i think about it, maybe there was nothing i could do better to prevent her from acting this way. thank you for the insightful take user, i'll try to keep this in mind whenever i blame myself for this not working out or when she pops up in my head.

Maybe women should stop rejecting them then, ever thought of that, dumb cunt?

Actually I am a woman and I read everything that was posted so do not assume. I am looking at both sides of the story. Yes, there are men who create new accounts/ numbers but there are also women who keep going and going when they can just block the person and then it would be done with.

>user argues that she's being an attention whore
>in an argument with an attention whore
>doesn't even realize the irony

>I feel as though she should have blocked him from once he started being persistent and this is coming from a woman by the way. I don’t understand why some women keep messaging and telling the guy no, no and no.

I'm not a woman but I've spoken to a lot of women in my life and heard their stories. I knew a woman who had her car set on fire by a guy because she turned him down for a date after he essentially bum-rushed her at the coffee shop she works at with a bouquet of flowers. I've known women who have had nasty rumors started about them, had their cars keyed, been stalked, had fake social media accounts pop up and send harassing messages to their friends and family etc,. It may seem like its just as easy as blocking them but from what I've been told a lot of women feel better when they know they've been able to successfully work things out and that he understands what they're trying to say. It may seem silly to you but a lot of girls go out of their way to explain these things because knowing that he understands and that he accepts the conclusion is a more comfortable option then just ghosting him and waiting to see what his next move is going to be. Maybe he decides he wasn't done talking to you and tracks you down. Maybe he gets even angrier by being blocked and does something drastic. This is shit that women think about. In a perfect world just blocking people you don't want to speak to is the best answer but in the real world this option can often jeopardize womens' safety.

...

You don't understand it because its completely illogical when you take it at face value. Congratulations on not being one of the bad ones.

WHO CARES.

Women are children. Never try to understand their actions. You should look at them like gambling tables at a casino. Keep playing until you strike it rich.

This isn’t silly to me at all, I completely understand. I’ve heard these sorts of stories all the time.

>i am, i'm only 18
Yeah I figured you were young. Every person has to go through this phase in early adulthood where they learn to deal with wishy washy people and dating.

>why the fuck would she hit me back if she didn't want to hang out again? i was at a point where i just took the loss and gave up, but then she hit me back the fuck up, leading me back into this bullshit again.
Again, mixed signals means no. She’s only interested in your attention but obviously if she doesn’t want to hang out with you then you know she doesn’t like you. It’s not that complicated.
>she said the earliest we could hang out again is fucking July, so now i'm going to have this bitch on my mind until fucking July when i'll go to ask her out only to probably get rejected.
Then don’t fucking wait for her. Don’t ask her come July. Move on and find another girl. You’re part of the problem if you keep expecting her to like you even she’s showing signs that she’s not.

He showed he was the kind to stalk her as he did not accept her rejection immediately and kept harassing her.
He kept thinking new scenarios in his head when the former got rejected, so he would have likely just tormented her if she had blocked him before killing all his ideas for good.
She did good to kill all his hopes forever, all of them not leaving a single one to him, and leave him with nothing to grasp at.

>This isn’t silly to me at all, I completely understand. I’ve heard these sorts of stories all the time.
Then why did you say that you don't understand why some women keep trying to explain themselves instead of just blocking them?

I can understand but not understand at the same time. In most cases you can just block the guy and move on.

For actually.
You , kill yourself.

Any course of action that leads to the creep desisting is the best course of action. That's all that matters.

>i'll try to keep this in mind whenever i blame myself for this not working out or when she pops up in my head.
Its upsetting when people aren't the people we want or need them to be. I remember being 18 and being constantly amazed and appaled by all cruel ways that people can be broken. This person is just very unfortunately broken. Something happened to her to make her think that being valued for one night at a time is the best that she deserves. Its really sad if you think about it. The best way to alleviate your anger in these situations is to put yourselves in someone else's shoes and appreciate that these kinds of people inflict pain on others because they can't manage the pain they deal with themselves. It isn't your fault. Like I said, if she's broken the way I think she is then she could of never been the loving, dedicated partner you needed even if she wanted to. I'm glad you got something out of my post. Keep your head up, OP. Being young is a horrific time emotionally but learn something from this. You'll be a better person for it.

>sketchy hobo approaches me on the street
>I proceed to talk with him for an hour about how much I don't want to talk to him
Completely normal, he had to get the message.

>In most cases you can just block the guy and move on.
True. I think maybe you should just let people do what they feel they need to do to ensure their safety and not make judgements from the outside looking in, especially if you don't know anything about the people involved. If you have heard these stories from other women then its a little disappointing that you aren't a little less judgemental and a little more supportive.

Or, OP could be a butthurt incel lying about this alleged date and she's a smart woman to ghost him. He even admitted she was not all that enthusiastic about him.
That's the theory I'm going with.

Okay whatever goodbye you are being extremely dramatic.

>Completely normal, he had to get the message.
Your analogy sucks. If the sketchy hobo has your name, phone number, address, knows your friends and knows your social media then maybe talking to him for an hour to get him to accept the end of your relationship isn't a half bad idea. A sketchy hobo on the street doesn't know where to find you if you decide to run away but a guy you went on a few dates with but now suddenly can't take no for an answer does. Idiot.

Get a gun you weak little gnat.

>she kept saying no to my stalking and harassing, she totally asked for it!
Kill yourself, rapist.

You said some stupid shit and got called on it. No need to be such a baby about it.

For a woman you sure act like an incel, down to the butthurt responses.

What does me owning firearms have to do with your retarded analogy?

How about we all stop arguing about this and accept that others have different opinions and views on this subject. If you are feeding into the r9k bait you really do not belong on Jow Forums in my opinion. And shouting “rapist” what the hell? Relax

Shut up and fuck off, rapist.

I get the sense that OP is massively overreacting. He says she can’t see him til July, so I suspect she’s on vacation or something in another part of the country, and OP’s mad at her “lack of interest”

I should've realized before now why this thread was going nowhere. Stay away from charismatic cult leaders brainlet.

Then I’ll be an incel I guess. I’m not sure what to tell you.

I didn’t say any stupid shit, it just differs from how you view it so it’s “stupid”. Grow up.

>I should've realized before now why this thread was going nowhere.
Because aren't allowing you to vomit your idiocy onto it unchallenged?

>I didn’t say any stupid shit, it just differs from how you view it so it’s “stupid”
You did. In one sentence you claimed you didn't understand why women don't just block guys then as soon as I explained why you back peddled and said "Oh no, I definitely understand why." You judged a situation you knew nothing about then flip-flopped when it was brought to your attention and now you're resorting to calling me immature and dramatic to distract from it.

Incels expecting other people to be at their beck and call? Why that never happens.

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i guess you could say that i'm desperate to make up for the last experience with her. she obviously wanted to do shit with me but i really wasn't in the mood due to anxiety caused by my HPPD. i just want to have some sort of sexual experience with her so i can get the shit out of the way and look back on the memory as an older adult with happiness instead of remembering how much of a faggot i was for not fucking around with her.

yeah, my emotions have been really fucked just from being young and experiencing all this bullshit. having developed HPPD makes it so much fucking worse but i guess that's what i get for being a stupid druggie. thank you again user, some actual good advice.

i've told nothing but the entire truth about my situation in this thread. i have no reason to lie to an online anonymous messaging board.

>He even admitted she was not all that enthusiastic about him.
i don't remember saying this directly, she's shown points of high enthusiasm and low enthusiasm about me, it's clear that she has mixed feelings and doesn't know what she really wants or she just sees me as a potential fwb or whatever. as i said in earlier posts, i think is the most accurate description of what i'm dealing with.

we live a ways away from each other and she's playing a competitive sport right now, so she's apparently busy for the weekends (the only time i can visit her) until July. i just don't know whether or not when July comes if she'll still be interested in another date or if she'll be over me by then. as many other anons have said here, i should just move on completely and try not to worry about it too much, but fuck man, she was my first kiss and i have wanted this girl for a while now. the whole sports thing just seems like an excuse, but i don't know, and there's no way i will know for sure until July, and that's what hurts the most.

Okay first off all, I’m allowed to feel the way that I do. I stated that I understood where you were coming from, while also still standing next to what I said when I mentioned blocking the guy and moving on. It really depends on the situation, not every guy is a stalker who is going to go around killing the girl he can’t have. I’m not butt hurt at all, I tried to end the situation but you were persistent in being right.

Move on and get another girl by July. Then, if she still acts interested... boom, threesome!

>i just want to have some sort of sexual experience with her so i can get the shit out of the way and look back on the memory as an older adult with happiness instead of remembering how much of a faggot i was for not fucking around with her.
That’s dumb. You’ll have to accept that not everything will be the perfect experience that you expect it to be. Sometimes girls you really like don’t like you back, and that’s okay.
>she's apparently busy for the weekends (the only time i can visit her) until July
hmm did she already know beforehand that you are available weekends when she told you she was busy on weekends?
Also whatever happens please don’t wait all the way til July for her. It’s not worth it.

>Okay first off all, I’m allowed to feel the way that I do
No you're not kys yourself

>did she already know beforehand that you are available weekends when she told you she was busy on weekends?
she didn't tell me explicitly that she was busy on weekends, but she knew we could only hang out on weekends, so it's implied from her text that she plays whatever sports on the weekends. we talked a lot between the times we went on these dates, so she knows that i live a ways away from her.

>Also whatever happens please don’t wait all the way til July for her. It’s not worth it.
i'll try not to, but fuck, i've never been good with flirting with girls and shit. i've had girls interested in me, but it took to long for me to reciprocate that interest. i also fucking hate talking to girls over online dating apps, i simply don't have the patience for it. it'll be hard replacing her with someone else, but i guess i have no choice but to try my hardest and see what i can make happen. i know it's not right to constantly be thinking about this girl and i need to get out of this cycle as soon as possible.

>she didn't tell me explicitly that she was busy on weekends
>i live a ways away from her
Have you tried asking her out since your last date? Also are you sure you’re not overreacting? From your posts, I don’t really get the sense whether she’s disinterested or not, just that she’s far away during the summer and you’re mad about it.

Listen dude, you claimed to not understand why women don't just block men then after you were confronted by another user you did a complete 180 and claimed that you actually did understand but that it depends on the situation which is completely moving the goalposts. After you were called on your contradictory statements you proceeded to claim that "well not every guy is a crazy stalker" which was, again, moving the goalposts and actually had nothing to do with the original thing you were called on. You stood next to what you said because your pride couldn't let you admit that you completely flip-flopped on your own position after being confronted for how illogical it was.

Im sorry that my response came off as flip flopping but that’s not what I did at all. I simply stated I understood. I figured the conversation would have ended there but again, you kept going. So, I explained myself and you still don’t get it.

If you feel it’s “illogical” then that’s your opinion. I stand by what I said period. Are we done

i said some dumb shit i regret to her, some really beta shit. i didn't put this in the OP because originally the purpose of the thread wasn't to talk too deep into the situation, but i said something along the lines of "are you really interested in me for me" via text and that didn't warrant a great response from her. that's when i started moving on, but then i immediately went back into this mind fuck of emotions when she texted me again. this didn't seem like that bad of a fuck up to me because we've had our falling outs in the past, but this seemed like it was the straw that really fucked the camel's back. so i'm definitely not overreacting in saying that she was (probably still is) disinterested. knowing her i just feel like she'll eventually come back and we'll start all over again like we've done in the past, but i can't keep living with this sense of hope that that will happen, because there is no guarantee that it will.

Its illogical because you completely changed your story and said the exact opposite as soon as you were confronted. If you're honestly so dull that you think standing by two completely contradictory statements you made makes any sense then go for it, you fucking dunce.

Okay then I guess I’ll be a dunce. I have nothing more to say.

she thinks "i'm going to give him a really good night and build his confidence" as though you can separate that from the following rejection

>Im sorry that my response came off as flip flopping but that’s not what I did at all.

Here's your first post:

>I don’t understand why some women keep messaging and telling the guy no, no and no. Either block them or give them an ultimatum.

Here's your second post after confronted with a series of explanations as to exactly why some women keep messaging and telling the guy no;

>This isn’t silly to me at all, I completely understand. I’ve heard these sorts of stories all the time.

So which is it? Do you not understand why some women do it or do you completely understand? The exact definition of flip-flopping, user.

>Girls are forced to say a lot of bullshit to guys on dates because when girls are honest, guys won't listen and leave them alone. You only listen when it strokes your ego. Have an example of what happens when your ego isn't stroked.
you're right. every guy deserves to be destroyed as hard as possible. i hate all of them except the really handsome and tall ones.

Are you done?

>i said some dumb shit i regret to her, some really beta shit
>i didn't put this in the OP because originally the purpose of the thread wasn't to talk too deep into the situation
Seriously? That seems like pretty crucial information. Why even make the thread if you didn’t want to talk about the situation? Wtf is wrong with you

>Okay then I guess I’ll be a dunce
Cool. I do respect your willingness to stand firm in your idiocy.

>Are you done?
Are you going to answer the question or are you just going to repeat "are you done?" until you exhaust everyone into giving up noticing what a moron you are?

Look, I’m done discussing this with you.

Then stop responding. Its obvious you are completely unwilling to address the obvious contradictions I've confronted you with so tuck your tail between your legs and run back to whatever moronic swamp you crawled out of. Bye.

I’ll say whatever I want thank you. You’re not my boss.

Are you done?

You clearly haven't seen a woman get rejected

You again? Jump off a bridge.

>your filthy, shitty kind won't listen and leave you alone otherwise
>I had a few negative experiences and will now label all men based on that experience
Nicely played user. You're a real keeper

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Can someone explain me why doesn’t she say she doesn’t want to see him again as it’s her wish not referring as “wasting his time”. This shit only provokes unnecessary chatter. Is she afraid to reject him directly?

Damn, you got us. On behalf of ALL MEN I've got to apologize to you user. We all promise to stop stalking and harassing every woman except for you from a new account/number. We promise to stop tormenting the innocent and focus all our efforts entirely on your.

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I wish I could stalk you and beat you to a pulp