Want to understand casual sex

What's with the teenager virgin know-it-alls in this thread? Hookups do happen.

Where are you from? Bc my bf is from a different country and he had a body count of about 10 more or less by like 27. This makes me upset and makes me wonder who im really with. Hes not even conventionally attractive so I dont understand.
Id like to think this
I am insecure but it seems like a lot of people I meet seem to have no problem with hookups. It seems like such a waste of time because ypur doing something intimate with someone who will replace/forget about you. Its like people who spend money on lottery tickets.
I can only imagine having sex with a guy I know is in love with me and will continue giving me attention. Every interaction with people I see as an investment in my life.
I feel like everyone tries to be so quirky and "free spirited" nowadays. And im the only normal one yet roasties and guys in general shame me for not "having fun".
I find this stupid too. Id much rather have an inexperienced guy who waited for me and then improved with me than some manwhore. Sex isnt so complicated where you need to fuck a variety of people to make sure its the right technique. Thats why communication exists.

Idk guys. Im not getting younger. Idk what to think.

I've had a gf just like you, for three and a half years. Then she fucked some random from Okcupid and has a kid with him. Are you really as trustworthy as you claim to be?

Oof im sorry to hear that. And yes im very trustworthy. I can see why a girl wpuld want to upgrade instead of whore around but cheating is never acceptable.

>upgrade
So that is a thing now? So why should I invest anything in you if you'll just leave me at the drop of a hat when Chad Thundercock shows around anyway, no matter what I do?

In the UK hookups are very popular.

Most likely most girls you meet will have had a Tinder hookup at some point.

I would only want to upgrade a guy if I found out something I didnt like that made me insecure.
If hes not my 10/10 I wouldnt be with him in the first place. If he cheated I would gave already left.
But theres that grey area of feeling insecure but still being in love and not wanting to leave.

It's a rare minority of people who actively desire casual sex. Most people desire "normal" sex, with some level of tenderness and trust, and they either hope to get that from a casual encounter (which is possible but not the norm) or they just cannot resist it. Like when you are craving fine chocolate and someone offers you okay chocolate and while you know it won't scratch the itch you can't help but settle for it.

No, people who hook up are not sociopaths. Desire for human touch, lust for other people regardless of love, is almost universal.

What is true is that people who hook up a lot are typically less suited for long term monogamy, because it shows a certain (emotional) restlessness and focus on novelty that does not do well with the monotony of everyday married life. Sex is also inherently vulnerable and hooking up can leave you with bad experiences and/or force you to "harden" a little and grow thicker skin that in term hinders you with serious romance. This can happen in a relationship as well, though. People just get damaged throughout life and while it is possible to heal not everyone has it in them to do that.

Would you say the number I gave is a large number meaning he isnt suited for monogamy?
What do people mean when talking about this subject and mention "novelty"?
And how can I tell if someomes damaged where theyre too hindered for romance? Its like I get mixed messages from him sometimes.

>itt confirmation bias and baseless statistics

I'm not sure which post/number you are referring to but my main point was that body count is only an "issue" insofar that it didn't come into existence randomly, it is a result of the life someone lived and their priorities.
It's absolutely possible to sleep around big time and still be a loyal, long term oriented person looking for serious commitment. But if you take a big pool of people only selected on the common denominator "slept around" then yes they are going to be above average in terms of thrill seeking behavior, adventurousness etc and those are not traits that are met in long term commitment. Basically, sex doesn't "break" people (most of the time), it can just be indicative of a personality that doesn't want to be tied down.

If you have a specific person in mind you know them best. Look at their capacity for long term investments: do they have friendships that go way back and do they enjoy that deepening bond? Do they have long term goals they are committed to or do they tire of things quickly and look for new hobbies every year?

>What do people mean
People who do sincerely like casual sex for what it is usually love the "fresh" feeling of meeting a person who doesn't know anything about them yet, building that image, the energy of a new dynamic and someone whose stories you've never heard before. There can also be appeal in the chase/game of seduction which isn't what long term sex accomplishes.

>how can I tell
This is hard because people can be (too) damaged in so many different ways. You can only keep your eyes open, listen to your gut. Do you often feel deflated or empty after seeing him, or do you feel better? Do you censor stories about him to family/friends because you feel they won't understand or misjudge him? Do you find yourself swallowing comments or downplaying your feelings to avoid conflict beforehand?

this just isn't true. some guys suck at sex but sex is about more than the dry facts of what people specifically like. the whole point of fucking different people is that it's not the same every time. some people you just have sexual chemistry with and you don't need to "practice" a bunch of times to have hot sex.

i am three years younger than your boyfriend and have slept with twice as many people. and it's only been stuck at 20 because i've been dating the same dude for the last three years.

Don’t bother, it’s yet another thinly veiled Jow Forums circlejerk thread

this is the most truthful and least Jow Forums take on the negatives of people into hookups.

Hook up culture and casual sex is pushed to destroy the morals of society and also increase STD rates for depopulation. The people all screw one another more and more while the STDs are becoming pretty much immune to all current treatments and medications. It is the easiest way to wipe out huge parts of the population. Just have them fuck each other to death and they will have nobody to blame but themselves. You're smart OP. Keep staying on your right path.

Hookup culture is pretty normal in any western country. Media glorifies it and internet bois despise it as a cultural downfall. In reality it’s a healthy activity that you can choose to partake in.
if your uncomfortable with the idea, you will find like minded people. We do after all live in a place and time where we can choose for ourselves. Dont let angry angsty dummies fool you.

thanks for the hot take reddit

I have to have casual sex because I find the first time I sleep with a girl it's usually REALLY good.

Then the second time it's kinda meh.

The third time it's an absolute chore.

I think most guys really feel this way but trying to find a new partner every time you want to have sex is an enormous waste of time so they go the girlfriend route.

This makes me feel better unironically.
Less population good. Less competition, less options, less chaos, etc.
I always feel like this era of smartphones/social media is a shitty time to live but I guess in reality it just brings out the worst in people, and unfortunately that happens to be most of the population.
I cant wait to be dead.

I'm not sure about you. but with me casual hookups are always bad because my brain shames me for days afterwards, mostly because I had absolutely no feelings for the person. It's almost like my brain is saying "you just got a women you couldn't care less about pregnant (even though I wore rubber and it didn't break) what the fuck man...

Make her drunk and puke and i have flashbacks oh shhhiii..
Reddit gay

Yaaaaah except you're wrong and everybody has been doing it since the stone age

Me too wow i am not alone. But suicide isn't a choice ok?
Reddit geeey

Fuck out of here, whore

Make her drunk, force her, many people in an early age. So i lost her to the many cause i didn't paid any attention to her. She was kinda iki to. But come on you are horny for a reason and you can't do shit against it. No sad song plox.
Try a lake and frinds. Or one of many birthday fuck partys. Usualy girls team up in the 12fes on 3 boys or 3 on 8 when they want to be speciale. But try for youreself.
Reddit gey

Fuck brexit, how i am suppose to get one of these Tindder girls now?

Frequent casual sex is a sure sign that someone is emotionally damaged. My own experience and the data on number of sexual partners and marriage success rates seem to confirm this. I've never been able to have casual sex without feeling intense guilt. Not that I don't do it but the more I do it the more numb I become to it. It's like how people say masturbation is normal and healthy. They've just done it for so long they no longer register that innate guilt response to it and so a woman who has been on the cock carousel for long enough won't even flinch at cheating on her husband or boyfriend because that internal barrier against it has eroded. She won't even feel bad about it.

Hmm so do you think 2 hookups a year plus lots of online sexting applies to that?
And that explains a lot! I dont really get the urge to masturbate internally yet im pressures and it seems like its the norm for other girls.
My masturbation is more thinking about the emotions of it.

LEMME TELL YOU A SECRET, user: Everybody is a sociopath, everybody listens to whispers, everybody feel chased... It is how it is, blame psychology :kek:

People were bad educated to have sex, that's also why we are stressed and we can't understand the idea of casual sex.

You are conditioned to feel like it's a bad thing. Part of growing up is accepting pleasurable things CAN be consequence free

That's funny, Over here in the US, she got pissed at me for the exact same thing!
But I'm fat and not confident in my abilities, thus very insecure with just showing myself and my dick, and so, left her dry.

Boys are educated to love prostitutes and girls are educated to be the prostitutes. They don't teach them that love/sex is a feeling. For example in a conversation you can let the other one know that you're feeling like that by saying: "I'm feeling horny" and then you can progress with the following question: "Do you know make sex to me?" and BOOM the magic is done.

Boys are educated to love prostitutes and girls are educated to be the prostitutes. They don't teach them that love/sex is a feeling. For example in a conversation you can let the other one know that you're feeling like that by saying: "I'm feeling horny" and then you can progress with the following question: "Do you wanna make sex to me?" *** and BOOM the magic is done.

it pisses me off. I don’t want to date girls who are promiscuous. Canadian girls are such fucking sluts

So how much did they pay you for this post?

Hookups and one-night stands are much rarer than you think. My university, which is in the center of a large and very liberal west coast city, did a survey on it and found that less than ~10% of students had ever had a hookup. Most people have sex after a few dates.

Every girl that I know is promiscuous, ... They behave like that, because they were taught to behave like that and knowing it makes me sad. I don't believe in girls anymore, I don't know I reached a point of thinking that they are all liars. Porn actors for life, I miss a lesbian. A lesbian would clear my thoughts.

I don't buy this. Just ignoring the wealth of data that shows that hedonistic sex destroys people's ability to pair bond my own experiences confirm this for me. I grew up in an entierly agnostic environment and the first time I masturbated I didn't even know it was masturbation but I distinctly remember the immense guilt that I felt after it. It was a traumatic experience and one of my most vivid childhood memories. From where was this conditioning? On the contrary, we are conditioned to believe that sex can be consequence free as you believe. I don't believe that there's anything in this world that is consequence free. As Augustine said in his Confessions: every inordinate affection contains its own punishment.

Are you a promiscuous man yourself? Canadian men are mostly degenerates, too.

is it scientifically proved ? All I read was just a silly opinion.

:clapping_hands:

Where is this wealth of data? Post link.

>but thing is ladies figure how good we fuck by how we dance

Explain

shaddap, you're being disrespectful!

no. I only sleep with people I’m in a relationship with. I’ve had 3 sex partners and they were relationships

I'm just waiting for an outbreak of antibiotic resistant donovanosis or something to end hookup culture.

>being this bitter about not getting sex

This. Bumpity-bumparoodly-doo

>Why have I never had the desire for casual sex?
Because everybody is different.

>Is it true that people who hookup are sociopaths?
No. That doesn't even make any sense.

>Then wouldnt that make every guy a sociopath?
Get off of the internet.

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