How do you stop relying on other people to be happy?

How do you stop relying on other people to be happy?

Attached: vlcsnap-2019-01-14-20h57m28s541.png (1920x1080, 1.12M)

This is going to sound lame but focus on hobbies you like. Get a dog or a pet. Focus on what you specifically want in life.

Realize that people are fickle and exist beyond your control. If you rely on them for happiness you never will be happy because you'll be yanked around by their ever changing opinions.

>focus on hobbies
I've been doing this for so long, but I think that's what I'm going to try and do. I was thinking of buying a tablet to try and do some photoshop art or whatever.
>pet
I might be moving soon, otherwise I'd get some pet shrimp.
>focus on what you specifically want in life
Getting a better job and moving out on my own. I also started doing something for this.

I worry that doing all of this will not make me happy. I was dating someone very frequently for about a week while doing the stuff above because I was lonely and unhappy, but just broke up with them today because I'm not ready for a serious relationship.
I think I will be unhappy again soon, but I will be trying the above to try and be happy. Thank you.

I do realise this, and that's why I want to know how I can do it. Being happy without depending on people sounds absolutely amazing.

Oof then yah I cant help you. I just broke up with someone a few hours ago because they also aren't ready for a serious relationship. I have some anger towards them but I still wish for you to heal quickly and to see if you doing these things, such as moving out, maybe getting shrimp, and creating some art will help you find happiness on your own.

Just think about how dumb it is to rely on others whenever you catch yourself doing it. Focus on being a good person and you'll find happiness in that

Yeah it was my first try dating again after 2-3 months after another break up, but that was a serious relationship for 2 years.
I also cleaned my room and put some efforts in place to make it smell and breathe fresher. You should do it too, it made me feel a lot more confident.
We can do it user. I guess we have sore hearts for now, but I am certain we will be okay.

I'm doing it right now. I'm in my room playing a game because I wouldn't be able to focus on improving my skills or applying to a new job now. I'm preparing to go to the gym, but I'm not inspired for that either. It's just for me to get out of my chair and stay healthy after work.
I was so excited, probably more excited than anything else in the year, to go with her on a weekend trip today. And I'd much rather have someone meaningful to do that with rather than sit here now.
The problem with focusing on being a good person is, that I'm already happy with how good of a person I am, speaking in terms of personality. I'm not finding happiness in that. Am I doing something wrong?

I'll try that. Thanks user. Your post actually helped a lot. I just wish I was just as helpful haha. My recent break was also 2 years long so that's even more relatable. But yah I'm sure we will heal soon. Hopefully, all we need is time to do things completely on our own again to get that independent happiness back.

Oh wow I'm sorry to hear that, but it's nice to know there's someone fighting the same fight with me. (Hmm, am I relying on other people to be happy again right now? I guess so)
Good luck user.

Being a good person is more than having a nice personality

What else is it? I'd like to strive towards it if I can.

Still here if anyone has advice

Be alone
Understand solitude
It's healthy to have others in your life and relationships, but they shouldn't be a crutch to rely on for happiness because that itself is hollow. It's not good for these relationships or you.
You're running from yourself.

dude you need some serious introspection now. what is a nice perosnality? being a good person has many facets. If you believe you are already good enough, you've failed. you're clearly unhappy because inside you aren't complete. human existence is always improving and struggling.
seriously get into philosophy, know yourself better.

You should try a challenging hobby that isn’t a team effort. Overcoming a challenge will show that you are capable and you’ll start to build confidence of relying on yourself.

I don't know what inside me isn't complete. Where would I start looking?

Right now, I think my problems would be solved in a more social environment, and if I were to have my own space.
Now I work from home in an underdeveloped area paying for a small room in my parents home.

Your parents are making you pay for a room? Thats bullshit. Just harden up and then get your own room and sleep with a gun, when some crackhead come stumbling in, blow their brains out.

I have something like this ongoing in my life almost all the time, but right now my hobby is technically what I do for my job too.
I was going to start looking in to a new form of digital art I haven't tried on Monday too.

I used stoicism to learn about virtue and how to live the good life. Would recommend. Nowadays I strive to find meaning through Christ but my faith is a bit lacking

>get a gun
I wouldn't pass background checks.
It's pretty cheap to live with them compared to living alone. I don't have to pay for food or utilities or any of that.
On my salary, it would not be sustainable if I want to retire one day. I'm working on getting a better job but not looking good.