Is a 4 year age difference acceptable between a 16 year old guy and a 20 year old woman? inb4 banned, I am the woman...

Is a 4 year age difference acceptable between a 16 year old guy and a 20 year old woman? inb4 banned, I am the woman. He’s a coworker of mine, and technically I’m his manager but the way things work there were all pretty much just employees, I just have some more responsibility. How would people view a relationship with that kind of age difference? The age of consent in my state is 16 but I’m not interested in sex right now. I should also mention there’s a pretty significant height difference, I’m above average in height and he’s a manlet, so I’ve got almost a head on him. Pic unrelated

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that's a bit questionable
I'm 25 and my bf is 21, but we met AT these ages, not before

inb4 underage b&

Nobody tends to care as much if the woman's the older one, but you being in a position of authority does muck it up a bit. Wouldn't recommend it as long as you're working together.

I have a friend that dates a 20 year old girl, and he's 16.
You can try but be careful.

Yeah, i've figured that's the biggest issue. I am actually transferring to another store across town pretty soon, but I figure if anything's gonna happen it'll have to start before I leave because we don't see each other outside of work, just text sometimes

>I’m not interested in sex right now
A 16 year old guy is not going to want to hear that. Sounds like it's best left as a fantasy since it's a workplace thing.

I mean it's not like I wouldn't if he made advances in a relationship, I just mean it's not something I'm looking for

start talking (at least through messages) with him every day and become his best friend, then you can try dating him.

Depends on how much of a roastie you are and how close you are to hitting the wall.

But damn you could give this manlet the mommy or older sister fantasies of his life.

I don't think he's into that, honestly I only have a hunch that he even has feelings for me at all, since I know for a lot of guys a height difference where the girl is taller is a turnoff

talk to him

what about dating a 19 year old, with a 4,5 year age gap im older

annoyed by the immaturity but ok

Oh Lord i thought he already liked you. How tall are you and how tall is he exactly?

Getting a guy to get over being with a girl taller than him is atrociously hard, never mind your age gap. A guy being with a girl who is the same size is already uncommon. Well you better have looks and a personality that will hook him.

I mean the way he talks to me and how he always goes out of his way to message me or find time at work to spend together makes me think he's into me, but I can't be sure. He's 5'5 and I'm 5'11. I don't want to be arrogant but I have been called attractive before despite my height, and him and I have similar interests and get along really well.

>5'5 and 5'11
Kek

Well let's go about it logically. Heels may need to go. Or maybe he's one of the very rare few men who give absolutely no fucks about being height mogged by a partner and would actually revel in it and be very smug. You could just be a fun manager and he doesn't see you that way at all. He could like you and be willing to work past getting mogged. All these things but you need to be more direct.

How have you tried to show him you like him?

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I don't think I'm very good at hiding it. I'm prone to blushing when I'm around a guy I like so I do that a lot, same with giggling and being way more awkward than I should be as his supervisor. When we message each other I also use a lot of emojis and try to write long responses. I'm not usually someone to actively go after a guy and he's not the type of guy to sit back and wait for the girl to make a move either.

Why do girls use emoji so often truly you are the worse sex, God forbid a woman be the first to chat online to an alien we'd get wiped out.

Well why hasn't he made a move yet then? Is yours a shitty retail or hospitality job? As his supervisor there might be a line he's hesitant to cross if he's the sort of guy to not shit where he eats. Maybe you just need to give him the opportunity to ask him out, I know you girls understand exactly what I mean.

We work at Burger King. I imagine the age difference is probably making him hesitant, which I guess means you're right, I would have to be the one to make a move.

>We work at Burger King
oh, fuck it then. Do whatever you want if it's not a career on the line or anything.

My personal experience is people tend not to care if they know you personally. I met my wife when she was 17 and I was 23. She was a book nerd cosplayer and I was a rowdy party guy in a shitty metal band.

We began dating a few months after she turned 18. I introduced her to my friends and they complimented the chemistry between us and knew I wasn’t just being a creep. My mother didn’t like her though because she thought I had brought another hoe home (previously I dated a stripper...which really was just me using her as arm candy whenever I did shows with my old band). As time went by my wife and mother became friends and my mother confessed on her death bed that my wife was the best thing that happened to me.

My wife’s family thought poorly of me the first year, and now they are constantly happy to see me, visit and even comfortable asking me to give the younger boys advice being that I’m considered the most fatherly male role model in comparison to other men in the family.

We’ve been married 8 years, and even today most of my coworkers admit jealousy that my wife is 6 years younger. Although there are times where I feel emotionally bad for my wife, her sexual libido is 3x higher than my own. I worry if eventually my dick will just get worn out from the sex 4-10x a week, and she (still being so full of energy and bubbly) will lose interest in me. I actually sometimes regret snagging her instead of letting some dude her age that can keep up with her have her.

Also there are times when I realize how inexperienced she is in being an adult and I have to hold her hand through many financial responsibilities. It’s kind of like raising her sometimes.

The moral: if you’re not a scumbag most people won’t mind. But long term there are other worries besides just being together. I honestly wouldn’t recommend dating younger people unless you are very patient, able to be humble, and have a thick skin toward inevitable strangers bullshit.

Oh yeah the age gap too but if the string of female teachers getting busted for fucking their male students is any indication.. it really is the fact that males can cope with being the younger one in a relationship fairly easily, but being the shorter one less so.

Also lmao if it's a burger king job then just go for it. You don't have to make a move, just make it blindingly obvious, perhaps several times until he gets it, that he should make a move. I dunno it's what women seem to do. Otherwise yeah just be straightforward and ask him out for something innocuous then ramp up the charm. Enjoy the ptp (prime teen penis)

hot

I have the same worries regarding a girl I came to know when I went to uni late. However, she's 20 and I'm 28. I have the exact same worries regarding regretting letting her be interested in me instead of a guy closer to her age and know and accept a relationship with her would be a big responsibility.

Sorry to hijack ops thread but since you've gone through a similar situation, do you think I should stop talking to her and leave her be?

>I'm his manager
Don't. Even if it's legal where you are, it will be considered abuse of authority if people find out of your roles.
Keep it in your pants and wait until he leaves.

Like I said before, you have to be really patient and have a thick skin. You will be called a pervert and be given the stink eye by many females, and her parents. If you can make it through that bullshit and prove yourself, things socially will calm down.

In your particular case, her being 20, you’re going to have to realize how in the past any arguments you’ve had with previous lovers is going to come back. All that petty bullshit 20 year old girls find insulting is going to come back, and most times you’ll look at her and think, “damn, you got a lot of fucking growing up to do”.

If you decide to pursue it, keep in mind younger people tend to like stupid shit too. My wife is obsessed with memes and constantly showing me them whenever I am trying to finish work at home. Younger women also tend to need vastly more attention than older men can muster.

My serious advice is only pursue it if you actually really can see yourself going the distance, if you can’t you’ll end up feeling stretched. Also stay very vanilla about your past, younger women love juicy details and that shit will always start off as some fun game that turns into her crying and feeling insecure and wishing she had experienced as much in life as you.

In conclusion,

The pros:
>more sex than you can handle
>bragging rights (I don’t know about you, but I enjoy the trophy wife aspect)
>lots of passion (the heart shaped sunglasses hardly ever come off)
>lots of fun (younger women tend to be more inclined to try new activities)

Cons:
>being treated as a pervert from time to time
>being a teacher/counselor 24/7
>pettiness and immaturity
>late night guilt and feeling like a burden sometimes

But I guess it also depends on the mental/emotional chemistry of the both of you.


Sorry OP.

Really appreciate you taking the time to write that. I'm gonna have to think on this.

Sex offender town.

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Age of consent is 16 here

OP here, I've been absent from the thread for a while and I figure most people have lost interest in it but in case anyone's here there's a followup question I forgot to ask. How would people see the guy? Like would it be a good thing in the eyes of his peers to be dating someone 4 years older and taller, neutral or something to be made fun of for?

That depends entirely on the people around him. Someone will always have something mean to say no matter what. It may affect your relationship but that also depends entirely on if either of you don’t think the relationship is worth the negative input.

>I’m above average in height and he’s a manlet
>I'm 20 and he's 16
What an emasculated faggot, holy kek

He's a football player in high school (not a chad or anything, he plays junior varsity), I guess I can probably answer my own question about whether those people would make fun of him can't I?

Honestly, he’s probably going to keep your age a secret. High school boys are really insecure and cruel. I honestly think he’s too young for you, but that’s just me.

For the record, I’m the user that married 6 years younger.

By too young I mean, he’s too young to take your relationship seriously, and it probably will be a waste of your time. He’s not mature enough for this relationship to be anything more than a casual fling.

I’d like to say he’s more mature than that but I’m just looking at him through rose colored glasses. I mean he might be, and he certainly seems mature to me, hell he’s one of the only people who consistently does his job at Burger King, but I can’t say for sure

>Is a 4 year age difference acceptable between a 16 year old guy and a 20 year old woman?
No, it's not. The police will be at your door shortly.

Honestly everyone seems mature until they involve their emotions in something. You two are still young, if you want to take the chance you’re still young enough to bounce back from it if it doesn’t last. Give it a shot, but I wouldn’t bank on it being a long term thing.

16 year old me was nothing like 20 year old me, and 20 year old me seems like a child compared to 30 year old me. There’s a lot of room for that young man to change and it might not be a change that you agree with.

Yeah, if anything does happen I’ll definitely be wary not to rush into any kind of attachment

>dating anyone under 23
how desperate are you

I mean I’m under 23 too

*his door

I'm not a fan. At sixteen he has only been figuring his sexuality out for at most a couple of years, possibly much less if he's a late bloomer. He is in a very vulnerable age bracket, look at the huge obsession in cinema/literature with coming of age and teenagers. This is a time everyone experiences intensely because you are so raw to the world and everything kind of adult can be overwhelming, whether you experience it that way at the time or not.

Your given sixteen year old is going to have different ideas about what sex should be like than a given twenty year old. I know that you say you are not looking for sex right now, but what if that changes and will he as a ball of hormones be able to actually be fine with that?

This is all still ignoring that you met being his manager. It is a lot easier from your position to say that you're basically totally the same, it's going to be different for him. You are still technically his senior, your word is going to outweigh his at work, he probably wants to impress you, basically imagine you are literally on a hill looking at a place you have to walk to below and going, oh, that's not much, and he is looking for the same distance but all uphill, we all have that realization at some point that "grown ups" still fret and have silly insecurities and quirks.

So no I would not think positively of it. Four years is nothing on a lifetime, but yeah it is at this age.

They will think it is cool unless they're level 99 woke.

Forgot to add, even without sex a guy his age should be goofing around and trying things at his own pace. The chances that you want a more serious relationship with more adult expectations (about time management, keeping promises, open communication) is huuuge. And it will alienate him from his friends to be caught up in a much more serious relationship and have worries and experiences they just can't relate to. Really just don't, sorry OP.

kek I bet op is just the 16 year old dude but posing the question from the opposite perspective so he doesn't get banned

What would they think if they're level 99 woke?

bump

OP is a pedophile conditioning and grooming her prey. Doesn't matter what gender you are - you're old enough to know better. You're a predator. Plain and simple. Enjoy jail when you get caught with your hands down an minor's pants.

Op said legal age is 16 where she lives, she’s not breaking any laws, just your sensitive little heart.