I just found out that my ex-husband is marrying the woman he cheated on me with. He emailed me and told me that he wanted to tell me himself instead of hearing it through the rumor factory.
How would you feel about this, if it were you? I'm kinda all over the place, emotionally. I'm not sure where I land on this yet.
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Well it would hurt a bit, i would feel happy for his luck on finding someone else, but reaally shitty cause he found her without telling me first/dumping me first
Yeah, I'm not all together mad or upset. I'm happy for him, but I have this salty taste in my mouth that's hard to spit out. I mean, it's going to happen no matter how I feel about it - so acceptance is healthy and letting go of any bitterness I have is only going to help me in the long run. Hanging onto shit like that only drags me down.
I just wish things had happened differently, is all. I don't know. Like I said, I'm kinda all over at the moment. Thanks for the feedback.
I'm sure it's really hurtful and humiliating. But the only thing you can really do is move on
Object at the wedding.
yeah
uhhh, no. I'm in a different part of the world at this point, so that's not gonna happen even if I wanted to.
They were meant to be.
You know, there's a part of my brain that said the same thing. I'm resentful for that thought, but it did pass through my ears once or twice. Accepting that feels cuckish on my part, but at the same time - what's done is done. He's obviously happy, and isn't that what love is supposed to be? Freedom?
I want a drink, man. This has been a lot of emotional processing this early in the damn day.
That's rough OP, but you'll find someone too and be happy
lol don't take it too seriously.. pretty sure user was shitposting with that one.
I would say, just let it go. He did soemthing terrible. It seems like it might work out... but they're also way more likely to cheat on eachother with such a dishonest start to their relationship. Who knows.
You're far away and living your own life. Don't hang on to this. absorb the info, process it, but let it go. You don't need to let this person who hurt you take up anymore space in your mind.
Instead of drinking, I think you really deserve to treat yourself right now. Do something you wouldn't normally do that you find fun or relaxing today. Just be extra nice to yourself for a little while and you should be just fine.
>I want a drink, man.
Damn, I don't drink.
But cheers.
Yeh, nah.
If it makes you feel better I'm torchering a guy like this right now. I'm friends with the wife. He quit his job and I get a smug enjoyment out of showing him up. I'll buy her dinner, gifts, spend time with her and her mom. And he just has to keep his mouth shut because he was the other guy.
thanks dude. I've got a few fish nibbling on the line, so we'll see.
thank you friend. nice words like that were apparently really needed.
>How would you feel about this, if it were you?
I'd be rage incarnate, but that would have started the moment I found out my spouse was human garbage.
Hehehe, that's sick you bastard. I love it.
Oh I did at first. At the very beginning when I found out, I fell deep into dark black hole of feelings that I didn't even know I could feel. The kind of toxic black tar-pit that you let yourself sink into and the angry red-vision that's thirsty for revenge and even blood. It hurt. A lot. I had never been stabbed so deeply before and I had to even reach out for professional help with the depression.
With time, I think I managed to peel and rinse off most of the "tar" off of me and claw my way up to a much healthier emotional level regarding the subject. I figured that I can spend my life being bitter and angry about it and grow into a hard shriveled sour old woman, or I can completely let it go and let the universe, or god, or the devil himself take over it and let what happens happen and try to start over, but with experience this time.
Glad. He's your ex for a reason.
Move on.
no prob. take care of yourself, go for a walk and get some icecream or something lol
It's pretty great. He's telling her it's all cool. But I know he's lying. None of his friends I've sent friend requests to have agreed. His mom shows up in my people I may know on Facebook.
And when he's alone with me he tries to intimidate me by bringing up his height or his stock portfolio.
come on now, be nice. Try not to bust his chops too bad.
Congrats , you are just doing something so unnecessarily it mind blows me.
Instead of using your time in an adequate manner you go off and spend it on such a selfish manner .
What do you get out of this other than spending money on senseless things and stroking your ego ?
How would i feel? I don't know or want to know..
I'd probably be hurt and angry.
But ultimately they deserve each other. I would never be able to trust my spouse if that's how the relationship started. Sounds awful.
My ex left our marriage after 6 weeks . we were together 1w years before that. It's been no contact since we got it annulled.
If she reached out to tell me she's marrying the guy she ended our relationship to become poly with idk. I'd probably laugh and cry. Drink a bunch and hit the gym super hard. Probably fuck a slut or two.
I'm sorry IP but you're better off.
It makes her happy and she's my bud. So it's really win win for me. Have a fun time. Make bud happy. Watch a cheater suffer.
Oh shit, I must have misunderstood - the husband cheated on your friend and now you're fucking with him?
I would feel nothing, he was a cheater so he’s dead to me.
He's happier now. Just make shire you're happy now.
Thanks man. I'm sorry the same garbage happened to you too. I like the gym idea. Might as well burn the energy and use it as fuel for something better. May have a nice bottle of something red tonight with a comfy dinner.
Thanks to everyone else, btw. I appreciate all the feedback. It's nice to have different perspectives and stories.
So at least his cheating meant something.
Also
>ex-husband
You have no say in this.
Noted and accepted. The goal was never to DO anything, but more just about emotional processing and reaching out to others with similar experiences and relevance.