So last night I'm in the bathroom jacking my shit like it's a DVD player on the origional fast and furious. I have the headphones in, on leg flopped up over the sink and two fingers massaging the perineum like I'm a masseuse. As I'm watching this chick get loads of man gravy thrown across her face I decide I wanna adjust the screen ratio. So I click the little button on for what I assumed at quick glance was the fit to screen. Then the screen goes blank after a second. Bewildered I scroll down, then up. Nothing. I remove my headphones and hear the loudest man moan in the world and my wife screaming what the fuck?!!! I accidentally casted to the living room TV
She comes to the door. My pants are off so I have two options, to take the time to get dress ( which is obvious) or open the door fully erect and admit I was jerking off. Secretly I'm a pussy so I choose the first and try and get dressed quickly, but the noise of me rustling makes her irate, I hear the door knob twist.
I didnt even lock it.
There I am, one leg in my pants, with my pathetic penis erect. The sounds of a second man dropping his load on the girls face.
Isn't that the sort of thing you should be using your wife for?
Luis Allen
nigga how are you gonna watch porn without wifi
Matthew James
Nope I'll never have a wife
Elijah Kelly
Wife is just gross.
Joseph Roberts
Haha gotta use that 3G and let it buffer for 15 minutes.
Logan Torres
unplug chromecast, not wifi. no power to chromecast fagbox does the trick.
Grayson Green
Aftermath, please?
Joseph Wright
Then you should get a mistress to use for those things.
Cameron Kelly
She made it all about her.
Hudson Taylor
It's the TV! It's one on those smart TVs
Connor Jackson
Oh no your WIFE saw you watch porn...who cares. I could never marry someone who had a problem with me watching porn
Would have been much funnier if it was your parents or family t.b.h
Luis Walker
I look like a middle aged Steve Buscemi. That shit isnt an option
Christian Brown
Slim pickers for wives when you look like a goblin from Harry Potter.
Henry Turner
wait, the fucking tv has chromecast built-in? I really detest this "smart" tech faggotry bullshit.
Matthew Reyes
Yeah, no surprise.
William Ross
You fucked up with the shame desu. If you would have just owned it and acted like it wasn't a big deal it would have been easier to convince her of that, but now it's like you know you're doing something that you're not supposed to do.
Angel Myers
>clicks a symbol that has a screen and signal icon >"oh no it streamed to another device" this is the real tragedy
Levi Allen
Lol
Noah Powell
Bitches hate it because it implies you don't find them sexy or aren't satisfied with the level of intimacy
Gabriel Wood
Not if you reassure them
Luis Morris
I dont tell my wife I masturbate. I keep that to myself
Cooper Watson
>calls wife too ugly to fuck >admits to being ugly as sin himself So, you feel like you deserve someone more attractive than yourself? If your wife is ugly, and you're ugly and not rich, you should just be happy you have a wife to fuck at all and just close your eyes and pretend she looks hot like your ancestors did back in the day while thanking their fucking gods that they were one of the men that even had a chance to fuck at all. Remember, you have half as many males ancestors as female ancestors. A hole is a hole, man up and do your duty and tell her you love her disgusting flesh sack of a body and she'll tell you she loves yours. That's what it means to be married and have made vows. You get the security of knowing you'll both lie to each other about this shit because you are partners in equally gross bodies. This is reality, take what you can get.
Nicholas Green
then disable chromecast on your phone and test it to make sure it's off.
Easton Ramirez
i think porn has probably ruined relationships for the next 100 years
This is literally a fear of mine every time I watch porn on my phone. I see that streaming icon in the top corner and all the time I'm like "oh fuck what if I've accidently pressed it or something?"
Logan Gray
Sounds to me like he's cucking her
Jaxson Jones
More like she's cucking him. Imaging having a pussy around but you can't put your dick in it. I mean I understand if it was some sort of partner play, but this is just sad.
Justin Carter
>So if your wife doesn't want sex I'm guessing you just rape her? >seethe
