I’m done

Feed the pain and the anger brother, blow that flickering flame until it is an inferno! We will see you on the field.

That's that buddy, always have a positive outlook for life.

Thnigs will get better, you just have to struggle first.

youtube.com/watch?v=vSxocnIaN0A

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I feel your pain. I've been to three funerals of close family members in the past year. Opiates is where I found my peace. Currently detoxing. We'll all make it.

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nice pic thanks saved

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Great place to show your feelings, user. Now you can fuck off.

Also, friends are part of the illusion. You're free. ^_^

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213339623
You're doing this for attention so I refuse to give you the (You). Life is not smiles and sunshine, it's a constant struggle, even for those who are successful and comfortable. So either grit your teeth and take your fucking lashes like a man, or curl up in the fetal position and crumble to pieces. I don't care and nobody else should. You either have an iron will and the inner strength to pick up the pieces and continue with your life, or you don't. Figure it out on your own and stop trying to drag others into your pity party.

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Addiction is a motherfucker dude. Rehab was the best thing I ever did. But even though I’m sober now, I still have these same thoughts and feelings, and that’s what I’m trying to get over.

I lost my way from God awhile ago....but I’ve been trying to find my way back. That song was great

Get a girlfriend and have kids. Death cannot be avoided but life is a choice.

Thanks senpai.

It's never too late to go back to god buddy.
He's all forgiving.

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I honestly wasn’t even trying to have a “pity party”. I needed to hear some genuine words of encouragement and hope.

I've been dependant in the past. Quit cold turkey once my professional life started to suffer. Had over 5 years clean before I started again. At first, sobriety feels like it's impossible, full of intrusive, obsessive thoughts telling you that the only way you'll feel happy again is by indulging. Those thoughts never left me, although, became easier to deal with. Slowly, you'll start to feel pleasure from living a normal life again. It does get easier.

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I went to catholic school my entire life. God was always a part of my life until I graduated high school.

Wanna hear a good song, user? Check this out. This bitch is deaf. Her name is Mandy Harvey. She was always a singer, but got some kind of disease when she was 20 and it made her deaf. She still sings, and that’s why she does sign language when she sings.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=BkTaVYhOFbw

I am failing to understand why you are even bothering to ask? It seems like you know the answer to your problems already.

Your moms is gone, your roommate is gone...you don't owe anyone your presence here anymore. Duties are generated by relationships, and all your relationships are kaput. There's not going to be any more meaning forthcoming. You've tried alcoholism so you know the logical conclusion of libertarian hedonism. There's no meaning there. And there's no meaning without duties to your relations.

Yeah you could follow some other people's advice: find a girlfriend, knock her up, generate all these duties so there's at least some purpose for sticking around. But you're so fucked up already. You'd be a let down to those people and forever resent yourself for falling short when they need you.

Like, I appreciate your need to vent and post about it here, but it's totally obvious what comes next. You don't need to be here any more. You can be free from all this bullshit. Nobody needs you around anymore so it won't be a loss to anyone. Subscribe to soph

take what solace you can in that you will emerge a better man than now, and that life will get better
time heals wounds better than anything, but you have to want to heal, being obsessed with the end will cause you to go down a very dark path, and speaking from experience, its not one you want to walk down
love who and what you can, and try to love yourself most of all, love who you can be, and strive ever onwards toward it

putting your misery on other people isn't healthy user

He realizes it though. Not many do.

Thank you. Literally one of the worst posts I’ve read on here. This isn’t /b/ faggot.

That's actually kind of impressive honestly.

No one's down forever .What you're proposing is cowardice.
If Hitler though like you, he would have never become the Fuhrer of Germany.
Giving up is cowardly.

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oy vey I am now demoralized and will kill myself and not vote in 2020

if you have to an hero, take some jews with you.

Based post. Thank you, user.

I'm not miserable. None of my duty-relations have expired, so there's more than enough reason for me to stick it out.

I'm just telling OP what he already knows- there's no meaning he's gonna pull out of materialistic pursuits, else alcohol would have cured him. And setting himself up with new duty-relations is only going to set him up for more loss.

i'm worried about his health; what is the point of 30-50 more years of his suffering? no profit in it.

Kek. This dude is like "ya you could make more duties n responsibilities or you could just kill yourself. like come on user live stream it already"

Meme flag. At least I wouldn’t die a faggot.

"no roi in living user. got that live stream setup?"

Nah, I would never give you faggots the satisfaction like that one dude did that shotgunned himself.

sorry, you're right. forgot i was on Jow Forums,

Keep going OP! The ethno state needs your white genes and productivity contributing to the white race. Suicide is what the (((they)) want you to do. And who will vote for Trump and MAGA if you're gone?

aspiring to be like past failures will only make you a present one
30-50 years is a long time, life changed for him in 3-6 months, whos to say what a year will bring? in 5 years time your positions might be reversed, be mindful

only jews and rednecks vote for trump

Thank you based user full of mindfulness

What's the difference?

The laugh of my baby son makes all previous suffering worthwhile. I never would have believed he would even exist at my lowest moments.
Live, if only for spite at the universe, and the dice will roll your way eventually.

my parents abused the fuck out out of me much much worse than any holocaust jew story..
and i still like them.. but i mostly just stick around for the dog.
my last lil bro just became adult.
now once dog dies, im gone.
he 12.5

Until your girl gets blacked n takes half your shit n your kid.

A fucking leaf gives me inspiration. God damn it. What a turn of events.

Oh, I have a dog. She’s the best. Yes, I said she. German Shepherd.

can relate since I am around the same age and think daily about whether or not i should neck myself. I was one of those "kicked out at 18" types and i'm stuck in a small room surrounded by strangers in a city full of immigrants, wishing that i could move back with my parents to save money and get educated so I can have a job that pays enough to do more than just survive and... simply have the familiarity that comes with living among your own tribe. Unfortunately, that's not a part of "independent" working class white culture.

hey Friend, I hope you find a reason to keep going. There is immense beauty and love throughout our planet, if you're willing to take the leap.

If you’re in nc and want to go for some pizza man I’m down

I live in the shit stain of America....AKA, Chicago

go walk the pct or at or something.

My biggest hope is that we do not go gently into the good night. If our culture must die, it should die in fire and fury, and it should take as many parasites and globalists with it as it can!

Yeah, I would love to go walk through arguably the shittiest state in the US.

There is nothing to live for in the end outside of Jesus Christ. Know that no matter what false meaning you or others try to give their lives, the last end of man awaits, and the final judgement after. Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.

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unironically smoke weed.

Fuck off Christcuck

You still got us, OP. Hang in there.

Throw yourself into the cause, mind, body, and soul. The white race is your family. The white people are your friends. We can't afford to lose even one soldier. Above all, know that the way you felt when your friend killed himself is how your people will feel if you kill yourself. Watch: Metamorphosis. murdochmurdoch.net/video/?play=Metamorphosis&playlist=recommended

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It's a part of life and hits each and every one of us. Stay clean anonbro. Be strong and pull through this. We need you here.

user, I don’t like weed. I smoked maybe like 15 times when I was in my late teens/early 20s....but it wasn’t for me. Like I didn’t enjoy it. I just wanted to lay on a couch and chill out

Cherish your bro dude. I'm only child and when my parents are gone I'm going to be left alone with all these memories nobody else shares or gives a fuck about forever until I die.

You need to find somewhere to nightwalk man. And just meditate while you do it. Imagine your mind is a river and when those thoughts pass through let them exist and then flow away until all you think of is the flowing water. You can do that after the nightwalk if you cant do that kind of thing while walking but it helps me. I put a rhythm into the water in my mind with the movement of my body. This wont solve anything but it will help you realize you can be clear and in control of your thoughts and feelings, happy sad or whatever. Even dark feelings. Let them hit you and float away, dont dwell. Learn to turn that lack of dwelling into a feeling, a reflex almost. Then hone it, train it. Don't abuse it, dont deny yourself your right to feel but dont deny yourself a right to control yourself in life like only a man can. To conquer fear and doubt only the way a man can.

This song will cheer you up.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=O1ViAIdO3i4&list=RDO1ViAIdO3i4&start_radio=1

Thanks user. I have been sober. But part of that is my issue. I went to rehab and got sober thinking it would also help me mentally too, but it didn’t. I’m physically healthier now(and I feel great, physically). But depression is a son of a bitch. I was living on that “sobriety high” after I got sober. But that ended pretty quickly, because my problems are still there

Because you're not meditating enough. You're still drunk on emotions and the reptiles of the mind my man. I know because I've been there and struggle all the time. You have to clear your thoughts and achieve CHIM in your head and heart chakras. It isnt easy, so forgive yourself for failing. Forgive yourself failing to forgive yourself. For your friend, for everything. You need to give yourself forgiveness as a reflex as well.

I’ll be honest, I did mediation a lot in rehab. I’ve barely done it since I’ve been back home

See. I know man, I get into terrible mental ruts and realize it's from a lack of focus and forgiveness to myself. I suffer from terrible addictions because of abuse, I know how hard it is to forgive yourself for failing mentally. It can be difficult too because when you really tap into that "Nirvana/CHIM" effect you might question what matters to you in life and that can feel overwhelming as well.

We get hard on ourselves because we want more but in reality, we're living in the simulation on nightmare extreme mode and dont realize it. We need to forgive ourselves, for everything, including what we do to ourselves.

I'm 29 too btw bro, I've seen some harrowing shit in my short life as well so I really sympathize with your story. I know how hard it can be to member the good times when you close your eyes and can hardly see them. But we've all got to hang in there for ourselves and each other.

You need a goal. You can’t just float.

be happy, you could be Japanese

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Thanks dude. That was a great response, I appreciate that

This is everything I have.
They are depriving you of your bright future.
Make sure you are ready to go.
And continue winning the lost.
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Entire KJ Bible on audio:
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You little idolaters can't live in delusion forever.

The most successful antidote to despair is having an earnest and vigorous faith in God.

Bare with me.

Fuck religion, fuck the evangelicals and bickering sects. Fuck the media's anti God propaganda. All you need to know is that if you exist, then you fucking matter, you're important to the stability and coherence of reality itself, of Creation.

We all have a purpose. Our purpose is to be our Selves, in as authentic a way as possible. I'm not talking about being who you are either, who you are is contingent, it's a reflection of society, it's the identity imposed on you as an aspect of that society. No, I'm talking about being *That* which you are. This is something different, this is your sovereign and immutable Self, God given and incorruptible. It resides in you, beaten, bowed but absolutely indefatigable.

Find it, *remember* who you are. You are an aspect of God, made in his image. You are not what you have become.

In purely practical terms you need to change. Read Exodus. It's a story about persecution, delusion and coming to know you're not the person you think you are and what you can achieve when you see that God has your back. *This* is where religion can help because it provides the guide, the map of how to navigate this realm.

Your Self is fucking important, it matters, find it.

Good luck, not that you'll need it if you can find God and your Self, and see they are both One.

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hang in there
youtube.com/watch?v=0mViA5rOF5E

Your welcome fren. It means a lot to be here for you when you're struggling. I care about everyone here so much. Male brotherhood is all that matters to me.

Calculate out your life expectancy. Since you're 29, you realistically have about 50 years to go. If you can grind 50 years, you always have that sweet, sweet guaranteed endpoint. So why not just live and see if things improve. If they don't, so what. You still die in the end. The 50 more years you have is nothing in comparison with all of time/being dead for eternity, so may as well see what happens.

>word salad
No one's reading that

It will get better, OP. Stay in the game, just play by your own rules.

>antichrist heresy
Nah

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Thank you guys. All of these comments are TRULY appreciated.

based and redpilled

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I'm an alcoholic too man, I know that pain at least. My friend since elementary school killed himself a year ago. He wasn't my best friend, but he was a bro and had a wife and daughter. Hung himself and left them to find his body. I haven't experienced the death of a parent, but I can only imagine the pain. The pain lessens with time though. This is a point in your life that you need the support of your friends and family. Talk with them, and remember the lives of those people. Cry. laugh, eat, drink, and live in their memories. You will join them one day, but today is not that day.

Sorry your mom died unexpectedly. Sucks about your friend, but friends are pointless anyway.

Jesus is the Light in the darkness but OP's head is low. He's not even able to look up.

Jesus lived

That’s not true. And he wasn’t just a friend(no gay shit)....but I have multiple brothers and he was more of a brother to me than 2 out of my 3 brothers are/were.

Thanks user. Appreciate that response, minus the “drink” part haha

Glorious brapp carousel.

OP WATCH
youtube.com/watch?v=lnr97uGmIc8
OP WATCH
youtube.com/watch?v=lnr97uGmIc8

Times are hard bro

I feel you, my good friend killed himself too, I’ll send you prayer support

This is why you fail.

No. Just complain about Jews and black people. That solves everything

I hope you can enjoy a beer again when you are strong. For now, stay away from the piss.

In this bullshit clown world that we find ourselves in....these responses restore a little bit of my faith in humanity. Thank you bros.

I can't convince you of anything but I can agree that life is hard and sometimes, seemingly, not worth living. That being said, leaving this earth by suicide or putting yourself in dangerous situations is more than the death of you. It's what could be in spite of the struggles, your life as all life is precious, evem if some grow to do evil. I've struggled forever and still do, I'm lucky to have my family and girlfriend but my curse is different. I'm becoming socially and mentally autistic. Half of my brain is not working completely healthy per a scan I had done a few months ago. I have ptsd and can't get in a car without freaking out and wanting to kill someone before they kill me. I have pushed away almost everyone besides my family because they have shown time and time again they don't judge me and want me to be healthy. Everyone else has used my state to take from me or judge me. It's really hard being a million places at once in my brain. Matters of some strangers bullshit story don't compare to the hurt you feel, just know I was contemplating death a long time, feeling like there's no place for me. But I've made my place. You can too, user. Please hang in there. May God bless you with peace.

Tragedy of existence. Stop being a pussy and keep moving existence. Everything you listed is nothing compared to what's out there.

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youtube.com/watch?v=uI7xzDNwLI8
good album for the feels if this is your thing. hang in there, everyone.