*WOOP* "PULL YOUR VEHICLE OVER"

THERE'S NO WAY YOU'LL TAKE ME ALIVE

What seems to be the problem, officer? Here're my license and registration. Oh, I'd also like for you to know that I do have a firearm in my vehicle, located inside of my glove box. I am legally allowed to carry it. Thankfully, I've got both of my hands placed at ten and two on the steering wheel, so you don't need to worry. Ah, I was going above the speed limit? I apologize. My wife is in labor, she's giving birth to my beautiful pure white son, Jonathan. I'm on my way to the hospital. Hm? You say I get off with just a warning this time, but be careful in the future? Thank you, officer, I will. I appreciate it. You have a good day, sir.

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>pretend to not be able to speak English
>waves me on in frustration after 4 minutes of extreme awkwardness

Literally this.
>be me
>driving home from work
>see a cop oncoming
>*hit the brakes*
>"oh fuck, fuck, fuck"
>get pulled over
>"the reason i stopped you was because you were doing 68 in a 55"
>don't deny it and act respectful
>get a warning and he tells me to "slow it down and be safe"
>"thank you, sir."
I even had a 30 pack in the back seat. kek
No big deal.

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Sir this is an abnormally large amount of money to be carrying as a civilian. And I just don't believe your story about how you just sold your other car even though you have a receipt. I'm seizing this money and if you want it back you have to go to court and prove you obtained it legally. Once you have shown sufficient proof you can have it back minus the court fees which are 250 dollars an hour. You have 30 days to recover your money or else it becomes property of the state and I will get a 5 percent cut. You're free to go now citizen.

Attached: money.jpg (875x583, 145K)

SYKE
ahah

AAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW SHHIIITTT IT'S THE PO-LICE WHAT IN THHUHH FUCKK NIGGUH I AIN'T DO NUTHIN! I AIN'T FUCKIN' DO NUTHIN! WHAT THE FUCK YOU WANNA SEARCH MUH CAR FO WHITE PIG, MAN, FUCK YOU! I KNOW MA RIGHTS, WHITE NIGGUH! YUH I GOTTA FUCKIN' GUN! *fumbles for seatbelt to exit vehicle* FUCK YOU OFFICUH I GOT A FUCKIN GUN IN HERE I AIN'T GOT NO FUCKIN' DRUGS, SHEE- THE FUCK YOU MEAN STOP MOVING, FUCK YOU, I'M GETTING OUTTA DUH CAR I GOT A GUN IN HEE, SHIIITTT
*gets shot*
SHHHEEEEIIIITTTTT PO-LICE BRUTALITY, SHHEIITTT NIGGUHH MAKE ME ANOTHA TRAYVON SHIIEETTT UHGGHHHHhhhhhh

Attached: download.png (1280x720, 684K)

Just got pulled over yesterday, given a warning. The patrolman was perfectly nice to me and I was driving a little fast. He didn't even want to see my concealed carry permit.

youtube.com/watch?v=nU5MyNuBdhg

Oi, sez ear that on the aoighth o' Joon, twenny-noint-teen yer posted on this ear websoite Foer-chan "fuck niggers!"
Yer loicense ploise, sir.

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Do you have a license for the rubbish in your vehicle?

This, explain to the officer your insurance is the glove box before you reach for it, have a dash cam to provide evidence against the tickets and fight it in court if it comes to that

It's been several years since I've been stopped and I wasn't actually doing anything wrong at the time. But hey, I'm white, so I don't chimp out.
>pull off the main road into a parking lot for officer safety
>all windows down
>car off
>hands on steering wheel
>answer all questions respectfully
Turns out he stopped me for window tint. He even verified with his measuring device that it was too dark. Gave me a verbal warning and sent me on my way. Of course, I'll never know the reason he really stopped me, but whatever it was, his suspicions went away at some point during the encounter.

Pretty much. Think I got 13 warnings before ever getting a ticket. Just tell them you don't know why you were pulled over, be respectful and have your info ready to go before they get there. Hands on the wheels with license and registration in hand. Works like a charm.

Taxes are theft and I don't recognize your authority!

Yes, officer I would like to forfeit all my rights.

Glow n the dark CIA niggers can't catch me! Fires shots at windshield of ZOG slave.

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Excellent stance. Next start citing maritime law.

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"are3 you detaining me? Are you detaining me? I am a citizen of the Sea and not a US citizen. My name is the name used by iunsurance companies to make money off me. I an the agent of the person whose name is on the illegal drivers license I must carry. I am free to go, you have no right to detain me ....and...is that a Taser?...Well I am leaving and.ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

>puts fut on accelerator

The state has no claim to the private property of an individual.

lol he didn't even check your id?

actually reading through this was worth it lmao

NIGGA I AINT DUN SHIET NIGGA I DINDU NUFFIN!!!!!!
>reaches for firearm
I DIND...
>bang
>bang
>bang
Omg the dun kilt D’Qarius! He was good boi deez cops is raycis!!!

>looks in mirror
>shit.com
>steps on gas
>drives through crowd of minority immigrant families
>sirens turn off
>i drive home and make love to my wife

easy peasy squeezy mac n cheesy

I usually get this, and even when i haven't it's because I was going 20+ over.

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this dosnt even happen in mexico lmao

Was that the Tennessee case that actually got their civil asset forfeiture task force dissolved?

I'M NOT DRIVING I'M TRAVELING YOU PIG FUCKER

I then furiously reach under the seat or into my waistband to pull out a weapon.

Attached: image.php.png (350x327, 121K)

Larp more neckbeard

Please cooperate.

> get on floor walk dinosaur
> get shoot

No too late nigger u got the registration out from the glove compartment without telling him. U would have been shot on the spot.

Problem, officer?

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>>all windows down
This is a mistake. You want to roll down only the driver's window, and then only enough to communicate and pass documents. Rolling down all your windows COULD be taken as consent to search, if they weren't up while you were driving. (I'm not a lawyer, just paranoid.)

Watch this video about not talking to cops:
youtube.com/watch?v=d-7o9xYp7eE

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>be white
>be Army Vet

Hey man, just wanted to let you know you got a headlight out.

Oh okay thanks officer

Have a nice night

>be black

WHY THE FUCK YOU STOPPIN ME FUGGIN CRACKER ASS

BANG BANG BANG

Hello officer was I speeding?

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Sovereign citizen just simply traveling here, officer faggot. What are you going to do about it?

Oh fuck, why am I driving?

You're a Reddit nigger, worse than an actual nigger

I know the video, it's a good one. I'm willing to "risk" putting the windows down to put the officer at ease. Being a former first responder, I know what a pain in the ass (and how dangerous) the public is. I don't mind helping the cop with his/her nerves.

>be black
>chimpout
>get shot
how could have this been avoided?

Out of all the times I've been pulled over, I only caught a break once, and that was in rural SW Missouri. Every other time I've been ticketed or arrested. I've gotten some bullshit tickets like license plate light too dim (during the day time), and not using a turn signal while exiting the highway on an offramp. Cops hate me because I look like a degenerate but I'm a good guy at heart.

>I don't mind putting the authoritarian boot at ease as it presses down against my neck, what if the officer gets nervous at the thought of an armed and independent citizenry??!!

Dude, re-evaluate your life. The cop is ACTIVELY WORKING AGAINST YOU, you're not on the same team. You put us all at risk with your puerile and submissive behavior, because if that becomes the norm then citizens exercising their rights becomes suspicious and prosecutable.

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This is really unjust because a lot of travellers prefer to carry cash. Personally I hate debit/credit cards.

i was taking a cruise in the ghetto here at night a few years ago and some cops pulled me over for no reason. (white boi in the hood at night)

just so happens i grabbed the new wallet i got for christmas which didnt have my license in it so i was immediately put in hand cuffs. just so happens i bought a few adderall from my friend earlier and they searched my car and found them. was put in the back of the car and they were grilling me about where to find guns for some reason.

anyways they took the adderall and uncuffed me and i got back in my car and drove home. wow i really lucked out!

2 months later i get a letter from the court stating im being charged with felony drug possession. after quite a lot of unnnerving bullshit and going in front of a judge for sentencing, i paid a lawyer a grand and he ended up getting the whole thing thrown out. didnt even go in front of the judge again (who was a nigger)

anyways that entire situation was really stupid

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Just a different perspective, I guess. Even before I worked accident/crime scenes with cops, I was raised by one that was on the job for more than 30 years. It's not being submissive, it's actively not being a combative asshole. It's incredibly rare for a cop to treat someone like shit who is not escalating the situation themselves.

>whitey in the hood
>buys illegal drugs
>cops make stop for no reason

Nigger, you were stopped because they knew exactly why you were there and they were right.

“Can you prove that I’m driving officer?”

actually i got them earlier in the day and was decided to take a tour of the shithole side of town before going home.

clearly they assumed i was getting drugs from some trap house in the hood at 11 at night. wasnt the case but i did indeed have illegal narcotics on me

Lul this is how I think of American policeman

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>Every other time I've been ticketed or arrested.
>Cops hate me because I look like a degenerate but I'm a good guy at heart.
>arrested
>but I'm a good guy at heart.

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Rolling over to expose your belly isn't being non-combative, it's being submissive. I've been pulled over and at one point (due to passed out underaged girls being in the car) was directed to step out of the vehicle and keep my hands out of my pockets. Only thing I ever said was yes sir no sir and that was it.

There's a difference between being actively threatening, being neutral and confident in your rights, and being submissive. Niggers are actively threatening, God-fearing white men are neutral and confident in their rights, and bootlickers are submissive. Again, YOU AND THE COPS ARE NOT ON THE SAME SIDE. Cops are paid to arrest people, are SUPREME COURT CONFIRMED NOT REQUIRED TO KNOW WHAT THE LAW IS (even though you are), and are also prohibited from being above a certain level of intelligence. Don't give them any ideas.

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>I did no buy the substance where you thought I did but still have drug

kek and checked

You wanna suck my dick faggot.

>due to passed out underaged girls being in the car)

how the fuck did you manage to talk your way out of that one? considering you werent arrested for being a weirdo with passed out hot lolis in the back of your car

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>walks up to window
> be beaner
>say " sorry officer i know I was speeding"
> " imma let you go but you really gotta slow it down for me partner"
> "will do. Have a good one!"

Also in Downtown Los angeles

they've got bigger fish to fry in LA and everyone in California drives like a fucking lunatic. and you're a spic and you all look the same so you really just blend in and dont stand out from the sea of mexicans he sees on a daily basis

>Just tell them you don't know why you were pulled over,
This. Do you know why I pulled you over? No. Do you know how fast you were going? No. Do you know what the speed limit is here? No.
As soon as you admit to anything they will write a ticket because you admitted to it.

If it’s a nigger or kike, keep driving.

Do yourself a huge favor and quit smoking weed

Usually the case for me. But many cops have already decided they are giving you a ticket before they finish pulling you over. Got my 2nd ticket in 10 years today; going to try to get it thrown out in court like I did the first one. Retarded fucking speed traps on huge downward slopes on the interstate where you're absolutely going to end up speeding, and if you slow down it becomes dangerous with traffic behind you.

My dad used to just tell every officer he had to shit really bad and it almost always worked.

youtube.com/watch?v=JTurSi0LhJs

AM I BEING DETAINED?

>*get pulled over because passed out little girls were in your back seat in back seat*
>"THE COPS AREN'T YOUR FRIENDS KNOW YOUR RIGHTS"

This literally happened to me the other day. Cop was white too.

"Officer i have to take a shit really really bad"
-based boomer

>Jewish Worker
>Jew
>Work

What a paradox

no nigger. LAPD is based and profiles hardcore. Something a lot of you faggots forget about when you mention california.

I have a spoon, but it's plastic.
Huh? Oh.. single use plastic items are illegal?

it's literally impossible for him to take you any other way, unless a muzzie with a box truck happens to be nearby

You ever notice on TV shows like Live PD, whenever a cop pulls over a black guy, they’re on the phone talking to their mom?
“Sir, get off the phone. I’m talking to you now.”
Black guy doesn’t even look at the cop, just keeps talking on the phone. Every fucking time.

>but I'm a good guy at heart
A degenerate AND a faggot?

>Be Asian can no drive
>or speak English
> run over child twice to make sure is dead

>how the fuck did you manage to talk your way out of that one?
They were my little sisters. Little did the officer know I browse /a/ regularly, but I got away with it.

Yeah it's true though. You're just mad I had all that underage puss in the back seat and you're stuck jerking it to kike produced propaganda porn.