I'm going fishing with my uncle who's a Klansman this weekend, what are some good racist jokes to tell him?

I'm going fishing with my uncle who's a Klansman this weekend, what are some good racist jokes to tell him?

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youtube.com/watch?v=sQUXMaxyhK0
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Do you know which Klan? I have some FBI agent Klan jokes.

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not sure, just know he's from West Michingan

JUST TELL HIM YOU APOLOGIZE FOR ALWAYS BEING A DEGENERATE NIGGER AND HE WAS RIGHT!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!

Here's one. You know I use to really like Hitler until I found out he never killed 6 million Jews.

Idaho even though having a huge number of firearms have the least gun violence and the left dosnt know why!
worldpopulationreview.com/states/black-population/
Thats why..

how can you tell if a nigger is pregnant?
you sit her down on a watermelon and check it for teeth marks.

I can't believe nobody has replied to this. Underrated.

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Racist jokes are toxic, problematic, and generally demonstrate a low level of intelligence. Sorry sweetie, but you should delete your trash thread.

231 represent

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There once was a thug named Brown
Who bum rushed a cop with a frown
Six bullets later, he met his creator
And then homies burned down the town

ask him if he can get you into the klan

Oh, that's weird. The scrolley down bar was tiny when I first came into this thread, as if there were tons of replies. Now I checked and the bar is huge and there was only 5 posts before mine.
I guess that's what I deserve for lurking from my phone.

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Hickok45 isn’t a klansman you dumb fag. Your joke: mmmb buhhh mmmm is what you say while you’re blowing your uncle

>sorry sweetie
Plebbit/tumblr fag detected
Gtfo nerd this is our clubhouse

they're are dozens of us... DOZENS!

Tell him the joke about the Chef and the fish who play chess against eachother.

A little boy says to his father, "dad, why do they say a thief is caught 'red-handed' when his hand is actually black?"

tell me ken, why do you have a demonic mace?

>Why are Camels called the ships of the desert?

Because they're filled with Arba Semen! Bum bum tssshhhh

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Arab Semen* dammit

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How many Klansmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
>3. One to screw the lightbulb and the other two to suck his cock because they're faggots

a spic, nigger and a jew walk into a bar

bartender goes "Get the fuck out of here"

What do you call an asian girl with an opinion? Wong

is he gonna soultrap a fish?

YU AINT SHIWTVWYTE BUY

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What would The Flinstones be called if they were black?

Niggers.

How do you stop a nigger from drowning?
Shoot it!

youtube.com/watch?v=sQUXMaxyhK0

>The klan stance on bigotry
We gonna need a bigger tree

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black?

Niggers.

i just realized this video is literally pol in 1 min

How many FBI agents does it take to change a light bulb?
Two to 500, depending on the length of the perimeter and how long it takes for the bulb to surrender.

>Chinese guy walks into a bar
>Says the black bartender, "Give me a jigger, nigger."
>Black bartender says, "what the fuck man, that's not cool. I dindu nuffin to deserve that"
>Chinese guy smiles with a stinky toothy grin. "Give me a jigger, nigger."
>Black bartender says, "How would you like it if you were behind the bar and I came up and said something like that to you?"
>Chinese guy shrugs, "I no care." and gets behind the bar
>Black bartender goes outside, walks in and says, "Give me a drink, chink!"
>The Chinese guy says, "Sorry, we no serve niggers in here."

Q: How do you make an entire group of Klansmen run to the parking lot?
A: "Attention: The driver of the black Crown Vic with Quantico, VA plates has left their lights on."

knock knock
who is there
it’s nigger
nigger who
nigger open the damn door we got s warrant
Sheeiitt

Is okay

I used to like hicock45 until I learned hes an elitist that doesnt believe in the 2nd amendment and gets paid to shill for the nra

Well, will there be? Please tell me it's no.

Did you hear about that new pregnancy test that tells you if the baby is black? If the chick pull their tampon out and the cotton has been pulled out, it's a niglet.

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Move to a white city

Why does a gorilla always have a frown? Because in 10 million years it'll be a nigger.

What do you call a chinese nigger with AIDS?
Coon Die Soon

Don't worry, friend. I've poured over all the evidence... Crunched the numbers. Crossed the T's and dotted the I's, and I have concluded that it's actually impossible for minotiries to enter the unearthly kingdom of God.
Don't worry bro.

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how does a black woman tell if she's pregnant? she sticks a banana up her twat and if it comes back eaten another monkey is on its way.

how does a black woman tell if she's pregnant? she sticks a banana up her twat and if its bike gets stolen another nigger is on its way

Two niggers walking down the street see a sign that says, "Turn White for $15." The two groids turn their pockets inside out only to discover that one has a 20 dollar bill and the other one has a 10 dollar bill. Since neither one of them has exactly $15, they can't figure out how they can both get turned White.....Finally one of them has a stroke of genius. "You take $20 and go in there and get turned White, then when you come out you can give me your $5 change and then I will have $15 and I can get turned white, too!" "Bet, dog," says the other boot-lip, and he goes inside. 10 minutes later, you wouldn't believe it. That nigger was blond haired, blue eyed, and even had on a suit and a tie. The first nigger says, "Man, holy shit, I can't believe it, you are really White! Hurry up and give me that $5 so I can do it too!" "Fuck you, nigger, get a job!"

If it's hot in the room, I sometimes say
>fuckin hell lads, it's roastin' in 'ere. I'm sweating like a nigger on a rape charge
Or
>fuck me sideways, twats. It's fuckin boilin' In here. I'm sweating like a pedo in a playground

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Why do niggers stink?
>So the blind can hate them too

What is long, black, and stinks?
>Welfare line

What did the niglet get for Crimmus?
>Your Bike

Why do niggers always drive around with the windows rolled up?
>They think the smell is coming from outside

What is tattooed on the lip of every niglet?
>Inflate to 50 PSI

What do you get when you cross a nigger and a spick?
>A thief too lazy to steal

This is wrong. The correct answer is that they were all apes back then!

Why don’t blacks have dreams?
Because the last one who did got shot.

9/10. Very clean. Very cool. Straight to the point, good old fashioned jokes.
I especially like the one about the nigger.

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How does the modern Klan feel about East Asians at the moment? I spoke to Dr. Duke last year and he was very respectful. But he also may be a little out of date where the Klan's concerned.

For real though I love the one about the windows being rolled up.
Mind if I use that one myself?

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3 niglets sre in school one day.
The teacher asks them, "What do cows say?"
LaEboneisha replies, "moo!"
Teacher then asks, "What do sheep say?"
DaTrayvonne replies, "baa!"
Teacher then asks, "What do pigs say?"
Leroy says, "Freeze nigger! What's in the bag?"

Underrated. Have a (you)!

They're all yours.

Bonus!

Why are there no niggers on the Jetsons?
>Because they have no future.

Why are there none on the Flintstones?
>They were still apes back then

show him the coontown video

youtube.com/watch?v=I7gtoLmHd5w&feature=player_embedded

How do you starve a nigger?
Hide his welfare checks under some work boots

Thanks bro, I'll use these sparingly.
Also lmao at the Flintstones one. I've been on a weird Flintstones vibe lately so that tickled me proper.
Did you ever hear about how copper wire was invented?

What’s the difference between a nigger and a pizza?

>A pizza can feed a family of 4

A variant

What’s the difference between a nigger and a park bench?
>A park bench can support a family.

Two Jews found a penny.

One more

Why are aspirin white?
>They actually work

I thought I had more reecist jokes, but I guess I don't.
Everyone is constantly telling me that I'm hilarious, but they never ask HOW I am doing.

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Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Fred.
Fred who?
Frederal agent. Freeze motherfucker!

Checkd, kekd, and rek'd.
I'm gonna have to download this one too bro, is that okay?

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Seriously though. Ask him for his badge number.

Well, how are you doing?

“What starts with N, ends with R, and is the worst thing you can call a black person?”
>”Neighbor”

Tell him "Sneed's Feed and Seed (Formerly Chuck's)"

He will laugh when he gets it.

Fun fact: Did you know that the top 20% of Blacks are smarter than 1 in 2 Whites? (Racists will never tell you this.)

This one comes from a black friend.

Little black boy walks up to his mom in the kitchen and puts flower on his face, he aays, "LOOK MOM, I'm a little white boy!"

The mom slaps him twice.

She sends him to his grandmother who takes one look at him and slaps him too, then asks what did he learn.

"Well I know why white people hate us now, we hit them for no reason."

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I have a lot on my mind, bro. I wish I had a way to instantly die but I can't an hero because I wouldn't want anyone to ever find me. I want to just disappear and not cause any pain to anyone.
I have a visa application in the works and I have to go to a medical exam, and if I fail it due to stupidly using the weed jew 7 weeks ago, I will have wasted the life of the girl of my dreams (my fiance) and I am struggling to cope with the guilt of being such a fucking idiot.
Feels good to get it off my chest even if you're just a random user halfway around the world.

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Little black boy covers himself in flour and Says"Look mom I'm white" Mom slaps him stupid. Boy goes outside and says "Look nana I'm white" Nana slaps him and says "Now what has this taught you" Boy says "I've only been white for five minutes and I hate you black cunts already"

visa application? why do you have to piss clean to get a visa? what kind of visa?

I'm fact, fuck that. I don't want to die or disappear, I want to carry on and be a legend of a man and be worthy of knowing. I just have to be very careful with my actions. Fuck turning into dust, how the hell can I ever improve the world if I'm dead? I just have to stay positive.
Thanks to you, burger bro.
(also my previous post is 100% satire and NOT to be taken seriously at ALL. I l.. Love living in a post-orwellian shithole clown universe country.. The gubmint is GOOD here!)

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You ain't gonna pop from 7 weeks ago. Piss will have left by now, and hair takes heavy usage to show at all.

Worst part about being a black new?
>back of the oven

Yeah m8 a visa application. I dunno if I'm being too paranoid or not but I think that's all I can say. Basically you go to a medical exam and they do a urine and blood screen, and they can find drugs in your system if they're present.
If I tell them upfront that I have done drugs, I have to wait another year to marry my fiance, and if I lie...well I might be okay but if they somehow know, I'll be banned for life. It's been 7 weeks now though and my piss was clean when I tested it this morning. I just don't know how else they could find out if I did drugs at some point or not. It's like playing a game of chess, and you can't see their pieces, but they can see yours, as well as your future moves.
The whole thing has made me sick with worrying desu. I just want to not be a disappointment for once in my life.

like an immigration visa to move somewhere else permanently? or a damn tourist visa? ive never heard of piss testing for visa apps.

It's to move, yeah. Well technically not, because it's granted to allow you to marry abroad, which then allows you to file for permanent residence. It's NOT for the USA either and I am also not a Britbong (VPN)

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may I ask, why not stay with your future wife in your home country? or is it very bad

Also, my thoughts are with you my friend. I promise youre not the only one going through some hard shit, I myself am in a pretty low place (neet for several years now).

What do you call a nigger on waterskis?

A top water jig.

What does "NAACP" stand for?
>Negroes Are Always Causing Problems
What does "PONTIAC" stand for?
>Poor Old Negro Thinks It's A Cadillac
Why doesn't Mexico have a decent Olympic team?
>Because every one of them that can run, jump, or swim is already here.
How do you keep a Negro out of your backyard?
>Hang him in the front yard.

What are the only 5 words a person can say to a Negro wearing a nice suit?
>Will the defendant please rise...

How do you starve a black man to death?
>Hide his food stamps underneath his work boots.

Turn it out
To the left
Take it back nog why'all
5 hops this time
5 hops this time
Hop it out now
Right foot lets stomp
Left foot lets stomp
Right foot again
Left foot again
Right foot lets stomp
Left foot lets stomp
FREEZE!
Everybody calp your hands

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She's got a really good job for one, and also she likes it there, and so do I. I like it a lot. And to add to that, it's always been our dream for me to move there to be with her, because aside from loving it there where she is, it really is a post-orwellian clown apocalypse universe here. Every day I hear cucked shit about people being glad they're monitored constantly. Savages running amok in our lands, our own people being made into the enemy of the government. Relentless, unceasing encroachment of surveillance and a big brother dystopia. Police knocking at people's doors to tell them to remove our flag because it's offensive to Muslims, etc. I just fucking hate it here bro. I wish my ancestors had the sense to put on some blue coats. But it is more a happy coincidence that I hate it here and love it where she lives. My main reason for wanting to move is to be with her. I would probably stick my roots in deep here if she were with me, and stick it out in the woods in a cabin, but it's very fortunate that I don't have to do that.

*All satire btw... This Mongolian sandcastle forum is where I come to post all my creative writing and it means nothing. All nonsense*

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Not politics.

Heh.

Got me.

Grow up

Ayy girrrrl let me take a Pikachu

That's friend. It unironically means a lot to me to just get all this shit off my chest, and Jow Forumslacks are true frens as far as I'm concerned. For a group of 'evil, vile, hateful bigots' (and whatever else everyone here is labeled as), there are some really good people here. There's nothing wrong with having an edge to you.
And I'm sorry to hear that m8. Neet life is fun for maybe about 2 months, and then you start to look at bridges and tall buildings longingly. What's the situation with that anyway bro? Are there no jobs where you're from or have you simply given up and are stuck in your ways?
It sucks to be in that state, but you just need a goal. A small goal. One per day. Gradually make them bigger, and always try to keep yourself busy.
I pulled myself out of a similar rutt about a month ago. My job got Shoah'd by a literal nose person, and it's been 6 months now and I've had no luck anywhere. So, I put my graphic design skills to use and sold some original T-shirts for some side shekels. Shit is pretty cool, but not for everyone.
I hope you're doing alright, m8. You literally owe it to yourself to at least try to be on top of your life.

>oy vey! Your racist joke thread is sliding 3 of my blacked threads. I can't have that. Stop it right now, goy! I have paid good shekels for this!
Memeflags.... GET OUT

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youtube.com/watch?v=T3SBfljjAh0