3rd World Encounters

Revenge of the Trash-goat. Pt. 1

>Be boot Lance Corporal in Marine Infantry
>only boot in squad.
>shit sucks, but atleast after a combat deployment in afghanistan I wont be a boot anymore
>First time outside the wire
>hike 15 miles out to bumfuck nowhere village full of inbreds because some self titled malik wants to be friends with us
>place literally has a naked retarded guy with a club foot chained by his neck to a tree
>he dances a grotesque and lethargic display of flapping limbs and shuffling feet while slurring some nusery rhyme so badly he actually manages to make pashto sound even more retarded
>we throw an MRE at his feet and he hoots with joy before being beaten by a child with a stick who takes the MRE away from him
>we pass the most depressing goat ive ever seen. Its tied to a stake in a literal cesspit full of trash and feces, its listlessly chewing on a shit-caked wrapper of some sort
>We greet the malik and begin buisiness
>this mostly means his wives serve us cha and bread while he babbles in dherka durk a mile a minute
>stew is served, we all have to eat it
>not as bad as I expected actually, meat is a bit stringy but not terrible overall

>shit that never happened

Revenge of the trashgoat pt 2

>bullshit i would come to regard as typical. He has no power or influence, is of zero tactical or strategic value, and presides over a village so poor and inbred even the taliban dont care about it
>which naturally means he wants about 500 grand worth of hearts and minds infrastructure and relief aid built in exchange for absolutley nothing
>decide to leave
>trash-goat is gone
>horror dawns on me
>we just ate the trash-goat.....
>even seasoned squadmembers whove deployed here before are a bit disgusted
>5 miles into our 15 mile march it begins
>cold sweats alternating with hot flashes, bowels turning to jello, shaking, trembling
>my stomach is cramping as if the trashgoat has reanimated inside of my colon and is trying to chew his way out of my asshole
>I clamp my sphincter shut tighter than my senior year prom dates legs were in highschool
>I am NOT going to shit myself in front of the salt-dogs. I dont care if the black goat with a thousand young is summoning an army of demons inside my ass, its not happening.
> Nausea and dizziness begins
>"hey boot, you okay?"
>"I think that goat stew fuck me u-" my sentence is interrupted by a solid stream of bile projectile vomited from my tortured stomach

revenge of the trashgoat pt 3

>The vomiting is just a feint, the trash-goat uses the distraction to headbutt his way through my sphincter
>as im vomiting a solid stream of hot syrupy liquid with chunks of rancid undigested and probably diseased meat explodes audibly from my ass
>I just vomit and shit myself for a solid 60 seconds, its not even controllable, the ghost of the trashgoat has posessed me, I no longer have control over my body
>finally stops, I have what feels like a gallon of warm raw chicken soup running down my shaking legs into my boots
>silence is broken by our gunny yelling "OH GOD! ITS THAT FUCKIN FOOD!"
>god cannot save me now, he cannot save any of us
>progressivley as the march goes on the trash goat's vengeful specter assumes direct control over his new acolytes of filth and suffering
>half the squad partook of the trashgoat stew, even the gunny with half a dozen hot deployments goes down and the squad has to be lead by a corporal
>we have a new master now, and he has a serious scat fetish
>by the time we stumble into the FOB we we afflicted are saturated in shit and vomit
>I was partially delerious but I distinctly remember our com-tech holding his arms away from his body in utter self disgust while he stared at the sky silently weeping and audibly prolapsing his asshole into his skivvies
>spend the most miserable time of our lives popping every antibiotic, antiviral, and worming agent the corpsman can think of while pounding gatorade
>it takes 6 days for the trashgoat's rage to subside enough to relenquish his hold over our bodies
>I lost 30 pounds

And Thats what dysentery is like.

had you waited for the rest, you would have found that it happened alot

>Countries are populated by hominids who are literally 15-25% less intelligent than us.

>Many of whom never discovered the wheel, or agriculture.

>It's totally Blomphs fault that they are suffering! Imperialism!!!

Darwin was dead right.

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>shit that wouldnt stop happening

fixed that for ya

African nigger countries were shitholes long before the US got involved.

We never invaded Haiti m8

Fucking summer time.

This is America.

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Actually I'm Canadian. How's life in the JIDF?

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Holy shit.
Funny yet scary read.

>calling any country a shithole when the police literally kill people for nothing here
>calling any country a shithole when there are towns without clean water here
>calling any country a shithole when third world """immigrants""" with their shitty third world mentality kill people on a daily basis here

This is America.

Just proves that niggers are subhuman animals anywhere they go.

there was absolutley nothing holy about that expierience.

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Genuinely horrifying. Imagine being slain by a bowl of stew. I don't think there's a less dignifying way to go.

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You do realize that Canada is technically America, right?

>Getting Dysentery
Damn that's fucked up. Does remind me of a wild story about a Delta operator going out on a recon mission when he had come down with it earlier that day.

I'll take "what is North America?" for $400, Alex.

This desu. I can get upset about the US proxy wars, but Haiti deserves every ounce of misery that it perpetuates. They don't manage their forest's, they call Dominicans racist despite Haiti being responsible for outright genocide against whites and Mullatos, and they practice voodoo. Meanwhile, the Dominican Republic is a place with an ok economy, wildlife, agriculture, and THICC mixed babes with rare Canary Island genes (blue eyes and blonde hair). Haiti should be cutoff from the rest of the world for the next 200 years.

>Their countries are such trashheaps that they have to be allowed to come live here
>How dare you call their countries shitholes! They’re so beautiful!

the worst part is the sheer helplessness. all dramatization aside, it was hell. All I could do for like a week was shake, shit, and vomit. Youre too sick to even feel embarassed. Its like being an infant again. Shitting yourself to death is a very real threat, I keep water purification tabs and filters and tons of meds in my SHTF stockpile because of that expierience.

That's an interesting coincidence. Do you guys have a new mandate to push unified government in North America?

Also how are the fish sticks at the cafeteria? I hear they're amazing.

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Pretty much.

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Buttmad leaf is buttmad

Havn't laughed the hard in a while shank you kind sir

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Japan?
Course theyre also xenophobic and isolationist so they can get away with it

Take this shit back to Jow Forums you faggot

Does anyone have the south african pasta about those guys visiting Johannesburg and learning that gorillas shit in elevator shafts etc?

All fake

I've got a really dumb one from a friend's relative so who knows how true it really is but it made me chuckle when he told me
>be radio worker in military during Vietnam war
>except not in Vietnam but in African desert instead
>shit's bitchin, job is chill as fuck and there isn't the risk of stepping on some abortion of a leg trap or dying in a mass zerg rush
>only downside is there isn't shit to do because it's the fucking African Desert
>decide to spend time just fucking with the other inhabitants
>the only other sentient inhabitants were the equally bored Russians a few miles away (fucking awful at spying on us btw) or the Chimpanzee tribe in the forest
>It's Tuesday, that's Chimp elimination day
>shut up, clock in, and loadout
>roll the Jeep up to the treeline, spot combatants
>begin hurling rocks at Chimp tribe
>first assault has begun
>all is going well until suddenly a rock is thrown back and into the door of our Jeep
>oh god here come more rocks
>OHGODMOREROCKS.fuck
>decide shit has hit Defcon 12 and get the fuck out of dodge
>speed off at mach 7 as rocks rain down on Jeep
>fuckers will pay for this
>mfw we lost a battle to Chimpanzees
>mfw when the Russians tailing our Jeep a half mile back saw all of it

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South African here.

I travelled to California and Oregon a few weeks before Trump made the shithole comment, and my exact thoughts were what a shit hole. I expected the US to seem about as wealthy as europe, but it resembled the nicer parts of south africa a lot more than say, belgium or Germany.

Your small rural towns are really poor, your infrastructure is rotting away, and your cities don't have a standard of living close to what i expected.
Also the last thing i expected to find was ramshackle squatter camps full of otherwise homeless people, but San Francisco and Portland were full of homeless people who'd pitched tents next to freeways or build shacks under overpasses. Also the food is really expensive even though its shite. Especially the meat.

Absolutely 10/10 forests and mountains though, some of the most beautiful I've ever seen

Fuck off Muhammed

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>>I just vomit and shit myself for a solid 60 seconds
I had that crap happen to me a few times
I at least was in the comfort of my bathroom
you can't puke in the toilet while pooping, one or the other
can't imagine being in the middle of nowhere like that

yeah our infrastructure and cities are ass.
we should take a page out of the jap playbook for urban development,
everything looks pristene over there.
most taxes go towards services and the military,
as opposed to just making and maintaining stuff.

>i went to rural Yugoslavia and now I'm wondering why Europe is just so trashy and ran down. Why does all of Europe look like this, it's too squalid!

>I went to major cities in one of the richest states in the union and they still sucked ass

>Thats what dysentery is like.

I had bleeding dysentery after a similar experience reviewing a construction companies security details in Turkmenistan in 2004. There they had a stature of their dictator that rotates so it always faces the sun.

In 4x4 with local mil gimp liaison 'officer'. 250KM round trip drive.

"I like boys...do you like boys?"
Silence from me
"I know good place or boys"
Silence from me
"You hear me?"
I light cigarette.
"Fuck you if you no like boys"

Then followed the longest and most enduring awkward silence that I have ever experienced in my life as we drove around Turkmenistan in complete silence visiting GPS co-ordinates marking literally nothing.

things that never happened

Would be nice to just be able to ice fools like that.

Why the fuck did you go to Oregon and California? Portland and San Francisco are notorious for homeless people, ridiculously high prices of food/everything else, shit infrastructure, and awful, liberal people. You're an idiot.

Go back to Africa

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>Would be nice to just be able to ice fools like that.

I have atheory that they go for episodic religious fundamentalism in the stans because they have such a critical mass of homosexual paedophiles they just need to purge in a frenzy of killing every generation to prune the numbers a bit.

.t anons link to rorating dictator statue

Finds that child raping population has in theinterm torn it down
telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/turkmenistan/8533427/Turkmenistan-rebuilds-giant-rotating-golden-statue.html

Then put it back

"Turkmenistan rebuilds giant rotating golden statue

Then built another monstrosity

"Turkmenistan has ripped down the notorious sun-tracking statue to its founding president, only to build it 60 feet higher. "

Then doubled down and built this

"Turkmenistan’s equestrian-mad leader has been honoured with a huge monument in the capital city, featuring his likeness atop a golden horse.

Cast in bronze and covered in 24-carat gold leaf, the statue of Gurbanguly Berdymukhamedov soars over 20 metres from the ground and is perched on an outcrop of white marble cliff.

Berdymukhamedov, who has run the country since 2006 and is accused of presiding over one of the most pervasive personality cults in the world, is widely known as Arkadag, or the patron
"

Its hard to explain these places to someone who has never been there. The bottom line is don't fucking go, especially to the rural/mountain hinterlands unless you want to see squalor you will never forget. Travel does not broaden the mind in the case of such places, it leave you viewing arabs/Turkmen/afghans/pakkis/poos as not human.

theguardian.com/world/2015/may/25/horse-turkmenistan-president-statute-berdymukhamedov

>Japan has been completely burned to the ground by the heaviest bombing in human history and two fucking nukes
>on top of that, they have major earthquakes that destroy whole cities every few years
>they had a major nuclear incident recently

And yet they are still one of the most advanced countries in the world. Go figures. It's as if race was linked to IQ.

> visit someone in NY
> go to her house where she lives in brooklyn
> looks like a 3rd world shitholes wherever I look.
> blacks make up 100% of the population

Do you want to tell me the USA is not a shithole?

The niggers and jews are responsible. States with low nigger and spic populations are literally fine.

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Still, its a disgrace to have regions like this in a first world country.

I felt deeply disgusted walking throu there

Such is the proper reaction to seeing the leftist welfare state in action. This is where I live, half the population falls below the poverty line but its somehow not a hellhole. People might be poor here but they value what they have and take care of it and generally have a dedication to community and sense of pride in thier surroundings. The difference between the leftist poor areas and conservative poor areas in the US is that the libtards sit around moaning "how could this happen here! SOMEBODY NEEDS TO FIX IT!" then go back to sitting on thier ass. The conservative poor go "how could this happen here! WE SHOULD FIX IT!" and they form a committee, find volunteers to help with the work, and fix it themselves.

Case in point, that old building was falling down so a bunch of mill workers and housewives and teenagers donated labor to restoring it and turned it into a community center.

Thats why a town in a red state where the average income is 20,000 can look better than one in a state where the average income is 40,000.

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>i went to some of the worst parts of america
>why is america so shit
(you)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_occupation_of_Haiti

Its fucking Haiti you retards America never bombed Haiti but you did Bomb German cities to rubble and nuke Japan and somehow theyre doing quite well.

>The last contingent of US Marines departed on August 15, 1934, after a formal transfer of authority to the Garde d'Haïti.
84 years later and they still don't have their shit together.

Nuremberg 1945

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lol did you even go to the nice parts of SF? North of Market, Pac heights, and Fillmore all rock. Touristy areas and somo are fucking garbage. Rural areas are hit or miss depending on how many Mexicans live there. Also the US is way more spread out, so rural towns don't have many resources but individuals can get lots of private land. It's a trade off

Yes British and US imperialism caused Somalis to have an average IQ of sub-retarded 68.

>The food is really expensive
And with that single lie your whole story fell apart. There's a reason we have so many fat people.

The US Marines have been deployed to Haiti on at least 3 separate occasions to restore order and build infrastructure like roads, schools, and hospitals on the US taxpayer dime. Of course le' French niggers destroyed or neglected them to the point of ruin after they left. My friend was in the Marines and deployed there during the Clinton years to get rid of yet another dictator. He said that he was ordered to shoot on sight any armed Haitian he saw - particularly if they were wearing a police uniform.

Every country has places like this. You just know not to go there in your country and are primed to see America as some backwards country

This is about encounters in the 3rd world. Take your Gay ass back to leftypol

I spent two months in Ghana, while apparently its supposed to be one of the better african countries its absolutely a shithole, cant think of anything I regret doing more than that.

traffic is deadly, and they have no rules or anything, everytime i went out i thought I was gonna die. I became legit terrified and decided to only be on the road if it was absolutely necessary. They have police checkpoints, but thats basically them demanding bribes for anything that might not be in order, but other than that, no action is taken against the crazy driving.

its dirty everywhere, just like in the picture you have plastic all over the place, everywhere cannot be understated, just going for a swim in the ocean sucks when you have bags clinging to your legs all the time. The africans themselves dont give a shit, and just throw their shit whereever. some burn their trash, which then goes into the air and gives the sky a disgusting grey color, sometimes they lose control of the fire and it goes amok.

about shit - I stayed in a small village for some time, and they have several places on the beach they just use as a toilet, they are literally so fucking stupid that they cant think of making a closed toilet and a hole in the ground underneath, disgusting animals. One time I was out swimming enjoying the least dirty part of it, and some fucking mongoloid walked down to the beach and shat right there infront of me. They also piss in public everywhere.

they are deeply religious, in all big cities they have preachers all over the place screaming into a microphone with huge speakers blasting everyone, idk about you, but I've never experienced anything like it in Europe.

Concerning sound, they blast everything, all speakers are set to the absolute maximum, no matter what, I went to a funeral and they fucking blasted some retard pop, bars in the daytime and on a regular weekday blast out to everyone. luckily I had ear plugs with me all the time.

their food is disgusting, tasteless and bland at best and at worst its something like "fufu" which is basically unbaked dough you dip in a equally disgusting fish soup, I ended up eating only rice because everything else was crap. I still cant understand how they never can think of maybe adding some spices, really if anyone tells you how good african food is, you can be sure theyre bullshitting you.

there's not a whole lotta white people outside Accra the capital, so you are basically almost at all time the only white person there, everyone stares at you, they call you "obroni" which mean white person, but after a while its just like someone calling you a nigger if you were black, and it gets very irritating, everyone wants to speak with you, they dont care how fucking tired you are, you OWE them time, you OWE them in all sorts of fucking ways. very quickly I lost all appetite in going out, because it was impossible to just be alone and not be bothered. They also think its very funny if you go running, because they cant imagine that would have any interest in maintaning your body (a lot of them are fat too) animals. I almost got into a lot of fights because they would just grab me, the white girls I talked with had it even worse, considering they just had to flee. Most of them are incompetent or just useless, I worked with a school director who became very angry whenever he was given criticism about his horrible planning and teaching methods. eg. english lessons consisted of them reading keywords from a textbook story (they wouldnt actually read the story, just the keywords) and the teacher, teaching them how to pronounce it horribly, them spelling it first while looking at it, and then with their backs turned, at no points are they learning the actual meaning of the word. The teachers also hit the children a lot, and use them for what ever tasks they dont care to do themselves.

>Haiti should be cutoff from the rest of the world for the next 200 years.

Haiti was cut off from the world,for almost 200 years, that's why it ended up in such bad shape compared to the DR, which had trade and investment from the old world.

That's Unironically because San Francisco and Portland have some of the biggest homeless populations in the country thanks to year round mild weather.

I also had a contactperson (from the organisation I worked with) who helped me with setting up downthere, he asked for money sometimes, and I paid for is food and hotels when was out with me, since he told me he did it for free, at the end he became increasingly greedy, asking for us to go out together, which I said no to. Turns out he was paid, he just wanted to fucking steal from me, he even had the audacity to ask for "support" when I got home. I also remember the last interaction with the common ghanian, at the airport, I was unloading my luggage and some guy helps me putting it on a carrier, then upon entering the airport he asks for money (you can only enter with a valid ticket) I give him some coins, because what ever, I cant exchange them to euros, he gives them back saying he cant use that, and upon noticing I had around 70 usd in cedis (their bills) he asks for them, because what can I use them for, 70 fucking dollars he wanted for helping me on his own for one minute, mind you there was an exchange counter right after the entrance. Not all Ghanians are bad, infact I met some very dedicated and genuinely good people, but really a lot of them can go fuck themselves,. I would say the only thing I got out of it was that i now appreciate how good things are back home and my advice to anyone is DONT GO TO AFRICA

Voodoo, cannibalism, repeatedly invading the neighboring country to kill wh*tey, and having no sense of how manage the land doesn't make for a very welcoming place. Nuunavut Canada was cutoff for a long time, and I could go there as a white guy, and not worry about the inuits gutting me like a seal. Yugoslavia with it's dark past still doesn't look like the moonscape that Haiti is. There's a certain point where people have to be held accountable.

wrong embrace the degenercy. haight street. the park. mission and dolores

>Travel does not broaden the mind in the case of such places, it leave you viewing arabs/Turkmen/afghans/pakkis/poos as not human.
...you do realize that that would in fact be a broadening for most libshits, right?

>implying liberals will see those countries for what they truly are
>implying liberals won't just become sympathetic for those savages and demand we care for them
>implying liberals aren't everything Uncle Ted talked about on overdrive

this will probably sound familiar then

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i know all of that. note how i use the word "would".

I have some more of these

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we did invade haiti you witless nigger

I've seen this happen first hand. Girl I went to high school with went to India for one of those overdone "eat, pray, love I need to find myself" trips after college and spammed Instagram with it. Almost all of what she posted was the touristy shit that is generally away the squalor that 90% of the population in the area lives in. Elephant rides, somewhat clean temples, the works. The few photos that did show the state of affairs were all came with the "oh my god we need to help these poor people" shtick asking for donations to organizations that are already in country and receive millions of dollars in revenue every year. The 60s were a mistake.

I was going to write "you say that like its a good thing", but thinking about it, it probably is.

>Its fucking Haiti you retards America never bombed Haiti but you did Bomb Germany

One of these things is not like the other

>most taxes go towards services and the military,
Fuck off libtard, the military needs our taxes far more than the infrastructure. What good is infrastructure if it cant be defended? Besides, we ought to outsource maintenence and constructon of infrastructure to the private sector anyway, it'd make it much better

go back to your Spotted Dick

What's really funny is when liberal self-hating whites go there thinking that "all cultures are equal" and find out otherwise in a hurry.

telegraph.co.uk/travel/destinations/africa/articles/crossing-the-congo-interview-with-the-author/

This one is particularly lulzy. This is a forum post of a liberal Belgian couple who decide they want to drive their Land Rover across the Congo. It has it all.

>crumbling infrastructure
>corrupt and inept government officials
>cannibalism
>soldiers and police who demand bribes constantly

Highlights include:

Couple sees some guys sitting next to a broken down truck. They were guarding the truck and its contents (probably a good idea) and waiting for their buddy to return with parts to fix it. They had been waiting for - get this - like a year.

Couple go into some remote village. Hear someone scream in French "White people! MONEY!!!". They slam on the gas and haul ass out of there and as they are driving away glance into the rear view mirror and see a mob of blacks chasing after them waving machetes and clubs.

Total hilarity if you can read the entire thread.

expeditionportal.com/forum/threads/democratic-republic-of-congo-lubumbashi-to-kinshasa.50799/

There was an American that drove his Land Cruiser from Spain to South Africa, alone. He met several tourists along the way, all had been raped repeatedly, and were in states of shock, but were apparently trapped there.

>/ck/.png

>Darwinism

Hilariously the same attitude that sent them there will prevent others from 'rescuing' them because dats racist

>>Jow Forums

GTFO
sage this shit

>US builds infrastructure for the nation of Haiti three times
>All of it is wasted and scrapped imidiatelly.

You don't need to be a liberal to want a balanced budget that doesn't revolve around ZOG.

Source?