Hiking in state park

Hiking in state park.
>rarely get a chance to hike on a weekday in the morning/noon.
>trail head has all of 2 cars there. nice. trail to myself.
>takes just a moment to find peace and stop hearing music in my head, stop hearing anxiety, worrying about rent, trying to be coo. finally im just walking in the woods.
>batteries are recharging.
>wow, its been an hour and i havent seen a soul. decide to go off main trail up one of those tiny nothing trails.
>steep as fuck but, fuck it. ive got a gun. if i see a bear or a serial wilderness axe murderer, ill be able to put up a fight.
>get to top of peak, takes an hour of *SCRAMBLING*
>looking down there is no one around. not a soul.
>at the end of the trail i decide to go a bit further, (5 min or so and around a cliff face) and hang my hammock.
sweaty so i take my shirt off.
>wind feels good. runs up my leg of my shorts.
>decide, fuck it, imma fap right here an now. not a soul around.
>give my self a long slow one. like 15 min. all i have is my phone.
>take quick nap in hammock afterwards. just a light breeze wakes me up.
>hiking back i am worried i was too close to trail. nah. i re look at things. i was well out of ear and eyesight and no one is out.
>hike back for 30 min and still not a soul. trail is mine. start talking to my self about doing a big back packing trip. fantasize about rivers and trails and whiskey and good friends.
>suddenly see 3 teenagers on trail heading same way i am going. they are about 10 min ahead of me.
fuck
>nah i was off trail before and no way they saw me.
>they wait at their car in the lot. what are they chatting about? I get in mine quick and speed away.
>before freeway i pull into a gas station to fill up. they pull in right along side me. driver looks right at me. he has a dopey looking grin on his face.
*FUCK*
>speed home.
>why did i do that?
And this is why if you want to fap in the woods, you should always go off trail at least 20min. not 5 min like a dummy.

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fuck this was for /out.
sorry. let it die and i'll post it there. my bad. i have lots of tabs open.

/out/ is dead and jerking it in the woods is defiantly Jow Forums material. Just ask Deerfucker.

tell me about your woods-fap gun

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What do the rest of you fucks carry while woods fapping?
Personally my P10c is convenient but a wheelgat feels right.

Seconded!

C'mon OP, what shootin' iron do YOU trust your precious cock'n balls to in the wild, wild wilderness? This is mission-critical information.

And what was your fap material?
>Big props if it was your imagination

NAA mini revolver tucked into a sweat band on my non fap wrist for quick access

its a S&W model 36 (no dash) snubbie (1 7/8) with a really well kept grip that i got a few years back for $400. I feel like i stole it out of the shop, bluing is almost perfect (once cylinder has tiny patina marks on it) which uglify it but, its other wise almost perfect.

has anyone else masturbated in a hammock before? im interested in trying it but im worried i would get motion sick

yer all perverts

I have

Damn, son! That is some classy cock'n balls protection!

Post a picture. What load do you carry?

i got a load right here

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>not jacking off in places where normies might potentially see you

How do you even get boners dude?

Also story time

>be carrying side car in pic related
>work break, my car is parked off property in a shady area
>smoking a cig while fantasizing about a 3 way with my wife and one of my co workers
>its Sunday, I have a clear view of the road, no ones around
>decide to see if i can do the kassel run in less than 12 parsecs
>take off holster for ultimate fapping relaxation
>place on my passenger seat
>7 parsecs later I've done the deed and feel no shame, but then...
>movement in my peripherals, contact right
>wtf there's a God damn trail that leads into the hilly area next to me?
>I try my best to put away my dick and holster at the same time, my brain fumbles
>I have not been trained for this situation
>jogger girl peers into my vehicle to catch a glimpse of me dual wielding
>jogger girl turns into sprinter girl
>I felt no shame

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no way. case the police are in this thread i dont want them to identify me

sounds like you had a similar experience. meant to be just a private moment. turned into a public one. lolx.
why sig?

>trail to myself.
>nope

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I've had sex on the main trail head. Fuck them.

Why did I carry the sig that day or why do I own one? Carried it just because my mood and that holster is nice and comfy.

I own it because I already had a polymer striker fired gun, so I wanted a metal da/sa gun. So far it's been peachy for a few thousand rounds. Frame was made in Germany, the upper from exeter.

At least you posted your fake green text shitpost on Jow Forums so it'll get deleted in an hour instead of next week. Don't shit up /out/

Glock 21 loaded with 255gr 45 super
olive oil is my preferred cooking and woods fapping lube

i did a girlfriend in a hanmock once. of course the obvious thing to try was rocking her while i stood motionless but I missed eventually and it didn't turn out good.

Did you stub your dick? That shit hurts.