Meanwhile, on 1948 Jow Forums

Grab your roscoe and help me solve my case involving this screwy dame and her loaded husband. And don't get me framed, you mug, or I'll get the bum's rush right into in the big house, and when I get out I'll give you a broderick.

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Be on with yourself copper. I got no business with the likes of you

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Oi guvnah, yon niggers done got uppity, chillax

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Millennial/Boomer cross generation shitposting. I like it.

No, it's shit. Sip-posting is the misunderstanding of the Fudd meme on steroids. It's for autistic assholes who think it's clever to post a shitmeme at anyone who likes anything older than a plastic AR or Glock. Fuck everyone who posts this - you are canceraidsebola and I'd kick your nutsacks fifteen times in workboots if I could. Thanks for shitting up my thread with the kind of aggressive autism that says no fun is allowed here and nobody's allowed to talk about shit other than which red dot is the best or whether .40 or 9mm has more terminal velocity at 250 yards. Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

>You will never be a PI in late 1940's America, wandering the dimly lit streets on a foggy night with a cigarette loosely hanging in your mouth and you hand gripping a 1903 pocket hammerless in your trench coat pocket as you feel suspicious eyes watching you from the windows.

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Sometimes the dame is the best part.

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First of all cock sucker, checked. Secondly, the fact that he took a screenshot on a phone for a boomer image with a twist to it is pretty ok. Needed to be praised. OC is fun and engaging. You're the one that needs to relax and have fun and stop taking it so fucking personal that people like to make fun of you with their superior intellect.

Did you just proposition me?

And just what if I did?

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Going under cover to investigate some fishy business on Bowery street. Will this do?

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OP is a gunsel.

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this idea was literally why I bought these two. I just need a remington model 8 to complete the package

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More Poirot than Marlowe imo

You're gonna need a throw piece in case it all goes sideways. Here - take this worthless Nazi gun I took off of one of their officers I shot during the war. If you have to, use it and then dump it in the river.

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Shut up jew

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>ywn have a moll with gams that go on for miles to bandage up your wounds

>Am PI
>Literally a desk job

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I am thinking about getting one of those Kraut "Storm" Rifles, seem to be better man stoppers than them heavy ganster guns.

I'd call you a dirty dick, dick.

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This is the perfect primary/secondary combination for 1948, you finks may not like it, but this is the peak of performance.

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We're talking about 1940's noir PI's here user, all gun fights and conspiracies, not real life PI work that involves sitting outside of someones house for 12 hours a day to see if they're limping whenever they come out because they filled for a suspicious workers compensation cheque.

>not Hi-Power
Stupid mook, you better wise up before I go upside your head.

Unironically, pretty much yeah.

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>Hi-power
What are ya? Some sort of European?

You can just keep these right on up.

stay btfo goy, we're buying all of your classic guns and then charge you too much for them.

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Oh dear, a missing young woman? Well I'm certain you can find her. Just mind your condition.

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It's sad how accurate this is. I would love to do some real Sam Spade level shit, but unfortunately the furthest outside of busting people for taking videos of themselves on snapchat without their neckbrace I get to go is creepy guys trying to stalk their exes.

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I forgot to add though, I do still have Desk Whiskey. It's a very important tool in this line of work.

Good enough for Gen. Patton, good enough for me.

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>I forgot to add though, I do still have Desk Whiskey.

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you can land a job like that, you just have to have some serious background in homicide, missing persons or sex crimes. Most P.I.'s I know went to school for accounting or something and work in fraud or white collar crimes. I also know a retired homicide detective that works as a PI and gets occasionally something cool
he also works for a rich as fuck family as security though

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Picked up the works of Raymond Chandler on a whim. I became hooked on those stories and read everything he wrote. The stories are outstanding.

Shriveled wrinkly fingers typed this post

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MOSINS!
GET YOUR MOSINS!
1891 BATCH FOR 99 CENTS A GUN!
GET EM WHILE THEY LAST!

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Well get them for free next time you go to camp

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Checked

Most the PI's I've talked too have the same general story, just some really boring insurance fraud investigation shit.

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Why would I buy that Ruskie piece of shit when I could but a good ol' American made Springfield for the same price?

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>Balvenie
My man!

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Since it just wouldn't be a Jow Forums thread without a trap with a gun...

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Raymond Chandler is a god. If like him you'll like dashiell Hammett and Ross MacDonald.

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NGL, it can be hilarious as fuck every once in a while, from crazy sovcits who think the CIA is shooting lasers at them from a helicopter to turn them into a pedophile, to people who are just the trashiest, ghettoest individuals imaginable, you wonder how they even managed to stay employed for a week. I would just prefer more car chases and pistol-whipped confessions.

Oh yeah, and fresh-from-the-source unironic Facebook boomer memes. I live for that shit.

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Ain't no palookas.

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Do you have a huge folder of these or something?

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Well I mean if you really want to go into the golden age of Mexican film noir...

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I think he does, just let the old man do his bidding
>this is now the equivalent of listening to old men and their long drawn out stories, they post their pics

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She sure had the look for Noir.

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whats a modern but still stylish detective pistol you can use in this day and age

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Reminder that Rita Hayworth was actually Rita Cisneros before going to Hollywood.

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CZ-75.

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So spicy

Not if she ends up in Ol' Sparky.

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>Its the night of the 15th of November
>In 2000 and 18
>I log onto 4chans' weapon board Jow Forums as I always have
>Tonight is no different
>I make a post on this discussion board about films from a bygone era
>Another man, Unknown to me says
>OP Is a Faggot

aren't you a pocket fulla firecrackers

if you slap me in a dream, you better wake up and apologize

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Tuesday night in an empty bar. I wouldn't mind, except for the fact that it was my bar. It was nice at first. Customers would come in and I could listen to their problems without having to do a thing about them. Lately though I wondered if it was right for me and my partner to quit the trade and go into the gin joint business. Ben seemed to like it though. He got to play that damned piano all night. He never seemed to get tired of it. He never seemed to run out of songs either. Well it wasn't going to be up to him. If business didn't pick up soon, we'd have to sell that piano. The bar too in all truth.
I was wiping down the counter, which was already clean from the first five times, when she came in. A brunette blizzard with eyes like an emerald thundercloud.
"I need your help, detective."
I wanted to say "You've got the wrong man, Doll. I'm a barkeep, not a gumshoe."
I looked at her heard myself call out over the jazz music, "Hey Ben. Get your coat."

Holy Christ those knockers

Whoever keeps posting these images is a god among men

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I ain’t no ones patsy wise guy, you got something to say, you say it to my Colt.

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