Soccor mom thread? Soccor mom thread

r/thathappened

Jesus.

Attached: 1552192364202.gif (220x162, 142K)

this isn't nearly as crazy but

>working as a bagger at a grocery store in a rich neighborhood
>one of our regulars is a dude in a suit who happens to carry
>one day while I'm sweeping, female bernie sanders comes up to me
>panicked whispers "he has a gun!"
>i look at the guy and say "so?"
>hfw
>she walks off to try and tell someone else
>everyone ignores her

Attached: 20190305_094724.png (331x262, 63K)

Coming at you with some fresh stuff. Not soccer mom, but there's nowhere else to post it.
>be me 17
>working at a chain of feed stores in the midwest
>pay is low, but I enjoy working there
>working the night shift with a friend of mine
>black guy and wife walk up
>notice the black guy is carrying
>rural enough to not be a problem, but close enough to St. Louis to be a little concerned
>shrug it off
>ask him standard stuff, 'Hey! How are ya!' Etc.
>he's not interested in talking, wife doesn't say anything either
>getting awkward, go for broke
>What 'cha carrying?
>his eyes light up, suddenly cares
>oh well, this is my glawk .40, uhh...
>literally pulls it out of his holster, finger on the trigger
>sorry, not holster
>his pocket
>muzzle sweeps me while pulling it out
>retail panic mode: eyes wide with mandatory smile
>issuh... gotta red dot sight innit, gotta extended mag too
>oh wow! Cool!
>yeah, gotta be careful these days huh?
>chuckles to himself
>shoves glawk back in his pocket
>wife doesnt even react
>rest of transaction goes without incident

Not the only retail story with guns I've got. Would be happy to share more.

Attached: 1552178554722.png (400x359, 167K)

Go for it.

Repost from the last soccermom thread because it got nuked by jannies. My family is pretty liberal and only a few of us own guns. Sometimes at family parties they get going about assault weapons and school shootings and think of the children and etc. They know me as the gun guy I'm our family because I live on a ranch and I use guns for business and fun both. My aunt said no one wants to take away my guns, just all the semi automatic ones. I then mentioned that most modern guns are semi automatic, and that would be taking away most of the guns. She said she was fine with it, and then she got confused when I asserted that she was okay with taking away the guns. She then reminded me that she JUST said that she doesn't want the guns to be taken away, just the semi automatics. She said I don't need a weapon of war since I can always call the police. I mentioned that I live 20 minutes outside of town, and if someone broke into my house, the cops would do me no good, they are too far away. She told me to consider moving if I don't feel safe. I mentioned that I feel very safe, with my guns, on private property. She insisted people like me are the problem, even though I just keep to myself 99% of the time.

I have so much more like this, it happens almost every family party since Trump was elected. It's always the same - just a big circlejerk that, fittingly, goes around and around, never getting anywhere. This is urban/suburban Californian attitude now.

Attached: he protecc.png (917x592, 852K)

oh boy another polshit thread about glorifying violence against innocent people and police brutality just because they have dissenting opinions
newsflash pol
k actually agrees with most common sense gun control we aren't like you "MUH SHALL NOT" bullshitters
so when you make threads fantasizing about killing people who don't agree with you, you're doing it here to us, who don't agree with you fucking Nazis.
but guess what we're not racists like you we actually like people of color we have people of color friends and one day they're going to break into your house and kill and rape your family
that'll be a lesson on why you shouldn't be racist little polshit dumpling morons
*spits on you*

Attached: 1487680407536.jpg (501x1024, 80K)

>never getting anywhere
That's because people are really bad at arguing.
Here's one of my favorites--associate gun control with prejudice (which it is)

Ask something like: "We agree that it's wrong to discriminate against a black man because we might fear that he's a thug. After all, it would be wrong to label someone just because of their skin color, right". (they will assuredly agree with you).
Then you point out: well, isn't gun control doing the exact same thing? Labeling someone a criminal even thought they haven't committed a criminal act?

Of course at that point you need to be ready for the "but but that's DIFFERENT" you'll hear in reply. At that point ask them to explain, which they probably can't. Then you can go on associating it with other things that are firmly entrenched in the liberal mindset, like LGBT issues, etc.

>>If it's wrong to persecute homosexuals because some of them are child molesters, doesn't the same thing apply to restricting gun ownership?

or extend the arugment to other things.

>>Why don't we ban computers to stop hackers?
>>Why don't we ban cell phones to stop drug dealers and human trafficers?

If he/she has a personal interest you can always get that involved too.
>>I know that a lot of pet owners beat or otherwise mistreat their pets, and that's horrible, so why don't we make it illegal to own pets?

...as usual, expect the "But that's different" reply, and then watch them squirm when they try and explain why.

Unironically fucking end your miserable pathetic existence, giga faggola

Attached: squashedheads9.jpg (450x304, 39K)

SHALL NOT

Can you try harder with your bait please?

Attached: image0-9.jpg (734x1087, 195K)

Why is it always family? With me it's my grandma on my dad's side and my mom. My moms more open about it but is still all about muh 'salt rifles! think of the Children! My grandma is way fucking worse. Unsurprisingly they both watch CNN religiously, and call republicans assholes at every chance. I went to visit her when I was younger and we went out for lunch. She always forced us to go to subway. This was when my gun interest first started to manifest so I was probably around 15 or 16, and there was a lady over on the other side of the subway ocing a fairly large revolver. There's not a lot of that considering my state(western oregon) I had to tell my own grandmother to just sit down and eat her sandwich because she wanted to yell at the lady! It's goddamn embarrassing to have to tell your older family member to not harrass people in public.

>Why is it always family?
What other group of people do you regularly interact with who don't share your personal interests?

as an anti-soccer mom post, I was driving back from the downtown during last summer and saw two kids waking by the side of the road: one had a huge fishing rod with fish on it, and the other an O/U shotty with the action open.

Slowed down and told them to be safe and clean the fish with a fillet knife. They said we will mister.

The end.

That sounds nice

you're a good person user

god knows we need more people like you

felt real leave it to beaver. Doesn't hurt that it's my hometown and we're all the same families since like the 1640s, so.

Inbreeding intensifies

might be why all the kids look the same and everyone's got one of just a few last names...

Attached: 1501782699306.jpg (700x1120, 150K)

Bait or youre new

Got me for a short while. 6/10 b8

Right? Honestly, decent try.

>Jow Forums agrees with common sense gun control
Are you on drugs? Even by bait standards this is pathetic.

Attached: 1548738804738.png (619x626, 111K)

Nothing crazy but just annoying

>Go shooting with friend who came to visit me
>Decide after shooting we were gonna hike up a 45 min trail to the top of a smaller sized mountain
>Usually strap my 12G to my backpack as I have a few other guns and empty shells/shit to hold onto
>Arrive at base of mountain trail.
>Parking lot is beside a church
>Pull out backpack, take my shotgun off and put it back in the truck
>Notice short haired woman in the window of the church glaring at me
>Tell my friend
>He didn't see her.
>Shes no longer in the window
>Whatever
>Hike to top of the mountain, chill. Then hike back down
>Soon was we get to the parking lot see two police SUV's
>Cops ask why I have a shotgun blah blah
>Give him my paperwork
>We went shooting in the woods, also lots of mountain lions
>Can see lady talking to other officer
>She's pissed off being loud with the officer
>Show other officer my shotgun
>At this point he's joking around with us
>Other officer comes up
>Big smile on his face
>Asks what kind of gun/if I go hunting blah blah
>Tells us to be more careful around this church, and have a nice day
>Church is some sort of nut job Christian Church.

Attached: 1550875303639.jpg (750x533, 43K)

"And then everyone clapped"

B8
If not, please remove yourself from this plane of existence.

My favorite is the pool argument as far more children die due to house pools than guns
>you shouldn’t be able to have a pool without a lifeguard!

Some She-Grug ok, but Rockgame Mother-grugs is terrible. This happen to grug:

>be grug
>am tribe hunter
>come sit by fire with warclub
>ugly rockgame mother-grug walk by with berry basket and two youngling grugs too old to still be pick berries
>gruginforitnow.cavepainting
>"UGH! ARGH! UNGA BUNGA!!!! Is that... WARCLUB?!?!" she-grug cries.
>i say yes it warclub, grug is hunter
>she-grug say "grug not have warclub, only tribe defender have warclub, hunter grugs not need warclub only sharp rock."
>grug explain "tribe chief say all grug can have warclub in case of ape-men attack, no t just tribe defender"
>Rockball Mother-Grug no listen
>"ARGHHH! HELP SHE-GRUG! HUNTER GRUG TRY TO KILL YOUNGLINGS! UNGA BUNGA!"
>Tribe Defender rush toward grug
>What happen? You attacking younglings grug? Where is dead youngling?"
>Rockgame Mother-grug speak
>"This grug have WARCLUB but he not tribe defender grug, him danger to tribe! Give to Chief for slave!"
>I tell Tribe Defender I hunter grug and chief say all grug can carry warclub when he went on mammoth hunt last week
>Defender-grug say he remember. He went on same hunt last week, and he think good idea, in case of ape-man attack, all grug should have warclub
>Rockgame Mother-Grug start insult defender, say he have Ape-Man brain. Say Chief also have Ape-Man brain. Say warclub is wrong and all club should be given to long-nose only
>Defender-grug grab screeching Rockgame Mother by hair
>drag her to chief cave
>Warrior grugs beat Rockgame Mother
>Chief give Rockgame Mother to Shaman.
>Shaman sacrifice her to Storm God
>grug face when

Attached: chudstormclub.png (485x443, 18K)

Attached: Oi+vey+you+blew+my+cover+goyim++_7ab72f6a29c7389bf7bb415d27d1580d.jpg (327x303, 20K)

hmm i forgot about that filename

Attached: 1538533124383.gif (650x804, 32K)

Good post

Attached: 1551446527765m.jpg (980x1024, 102K)

Damn I'm glad my family isn't this way, even -almost- everyone in my family that lives in Chicago too. Some of them may be dems or fudds that don't believe automatics should be legal but hey they're at least completely against the loss of semis and they wouldn't comply with seizures when the city was going wild back in the early 2000s or so.
Except for one.
I have a cousin who's in his 50s or so living in Chicago that said he would report me to the FBI for owning an SKS when I sent him a picture over facebook. Didn't know he was some crazy ass liberal at the time.
Anyway I went under FBI investigation about a year ago in my last couple months of HS. Strangely enough it came from a tip from someone else the previous year when I didn't own any guns. Really sucked.

Anyone who believes this is real is a stone cold idiot.

>Say warclub is wrong and all club should be given to long-nose only
kek

Jew meme alert

We know the stories are fake, you fucking tard. We just enjoy the idea of them. Go play in traffic

Did the cops all swarm in and carry him on their shoulders all shouting "You can shoot with us at our range anytime bud!"

>step grandmother on dads side
>70 years old
>always complains about trump durring family gatherings
>muh school shootings constantly
>always looks at me like i have 8 eyes when i speak up for myself
>bragged about blocking her immediate family on Zuckerbook because they said something good about the president

>be me
>packin’ up muh fins to go shooting at the range
>see neighbor outside
>Hey user, gonna have a fun morning huh?
>bullshit for a bit, go back to grab the shotgun
>female neighbor taking out her trash sees me
>asks me if I’m gonna go duck hunting
>tell her I’m just gonna go do some target shooting that morning
>tells me to have fun and be safe
>mfw

God bless rural America

Attached: 21575CA4-944D-440C-89F7-B4EF1521D87D.jpg (678x381, 34K)

NOW KEES

Attached: 1493358123812.jpg (832x1490, 385K)

Excellent

the problem is that usually they counter with
>"but user, we arent getting rid of guns, just making them harder to get!"
which honestly, i get stumped with because i dont want to go full retard and REEE at someone about how every restriction is a violation of the constitution

gay, but I hope it's not fake

Ask if they support poor people not being able to defend themselves. Every tax or bureaucratic hurdle disproportionately effects the poor, who are the most likely group to be the victims of violent crimes.

Watch them squirm.

Guess I got lucky with my family. Parents bought me my first two guns, regularly go shooting with my dad, and have gone shooting as a family one time, including my brother in law
Actually been thinking of getting my sister and brother in law a gun as a house warming gift, just need to talk it over with them about it

Gonna dump some classic pasta. Just bear with me on image quality.

Attached: 1360974976660.png (885x629, 68K)

Attached: 1369792080736.jpg (1153x1321, 249K)

Attached: 1374630380228.png (784x448, 62K)

Attached: 1375293521386.png (1198x1306, 197K)

Attached: 1375574505059.png (1384x4032, 438K)

Attached: 1375589513383.png (1478x883, 71K)

Attached: 1375729002446.jpg (640x535, 130K)

Attached: 1375732553894.jpg (1722x361, 90K)

Attached: 1375739523755.jpg (1000x1020, 246K)

Attached: 1377393550342.png (1020x1135, 109K)

Attached: 1471871273182.png (1296x1592, 150K)

Attached: 1388331260412.png (1040x1256, 137K)

And don't forget to point out that black people are more likely to be poor and more likely to have less access to government services (see lib arguments against voter ID).

Why do they hate black people?

Attached: 1388331422324.png (1132x1346, 112K)

Attached: 1552101220725.jpg (320x401, 44K)

Hey if we’re sharing stories about guns in retail one of my former bosses wanted me to defend the stores cash register with a glock one day.

This one I can believe.

This my first time lurking Jow Forums and this shit is the most funny thing i've read in months

>be metisbro
>hunting
>one night while sleeping I hear cries for help
>follow them until I stumble into a crashed car neat the road
>soccermom approaches me
>"I don't know what brings you out at this time mister but please help my son"
>oksure.jpg
>drag him out
>boy of 16, unconscious
>lay down gun at the side
>mom sees it
>"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"
>before I even have time to react she grabs the gun and holds it in ny direction
>"I'm just helping you ma'am"
>"ALRIGHT THEN HELP HIM. THIS IS GONNA AT LEAST ACCOUNT FOR SOME OF THE PEOPLE YOU KILLED"
>whatever.jpg
>cpr works on her son
>she called the cops in the meantime
>I stay there until the cops come, listening to her rant about how my people were barbarians and maybe whites should have killed us all
>I'm pissed
>safety probably still on but don't take any chances
>cops eventually arrive
>soccermom goes on rant about how I tried to rape her and kill her boy so she heroically manages to get the gun away from me
>stay silent
>cops put me under hancuffs but child speaks up
>says it's all bullshit and that for the whole time waiting for the cops he hasn't heard one comment about what I did but she heard many about her being racist
>she's pissed off
>eventually things start turning away from me and into family stuff
>turns put soccermom was divorced and son was pissed at her for using lies to block dad's custody in court and force him to stay with her
>she tried to use this against his credibility
>she sounds more and more like a liar
>eventually after a long conversation cops arrest soccermom
>got to sue her for handling my gun, threatening me and racism
>tfw I managed to get 70,000$ in net reparations after deductions in the process and the dad also sued her for his kid back
>she is now in prison
Whites aren't all bad but goddamn I'm happy this bitch is in prison.

based metisbro

>at shooting range
>Lady with "Can I see your manager" Haircut comes
This won't be good.jpg
>She brings in her own handgun and outshoots most others

Soccer moms are fucking terrifying when practicing to protect their kids.

unfortunate that 99% of this shit never happened but it's still exciting in an odd way

BRRRRRRRRRRRT

Attached: 1467425161787.jpg (1233x580, 88K)

>be me
>active duty army at the time
>store guns at friends apartment off post
>go over because we going to to range
>we start loading guns up into my truck
>some lady storms up and asks if those are guns
>buddy says yeah because he dgaf
>she shouts that only the military should have guns
>tell her we are military
>grab pc from truck
>she just stares at it
>her brain must have short circuited
>finish packing up guns and drive off with her just standing in the parking lot

Hi hello welcome to Jow Forums
>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

I had a similar story when I was working my first job.

>be 18 y/o working at dollar store in Oklahoma
>Joey is here OCing his 686, Joey is a bit of a cringe neckbeard, but he comes here all the time and is a pretty chill dude
>see a California plate pull up to the front of the store, woman in her early 30s gets out
>seething in anger that this commie is shitting up my wild west state by simply being here
>goes through the store for about 2 minutes before speed walking to the counter
>"Thereisamanwithaguninhere" spoken as quickly and quietly as I've ever heard someone speak
>"Oh, yeah, he always does that. Don't worry about him."
>without a word, the bitch runs to her car and gets on the phone
>Joey pays and leaves while this is going on
>police come to the store, ask to see the cameras because apparently he was "waving a gun around"
>as soon as they see Joey on the cameras, they say they don't need anymore
>ask if he's in trouble, worried my dude's actually been wanted this whole time
>he's not. Cops recognized him immediately as "the guy that just LOOKS like a mass shooter". Gets a lot of "man with a gun" calls on him.
>next day, Joey is back at the store. On his way out, I tell him what happened
>audibly says fuck and storms out
>see him a week later definitely not printing from his new IWB holster

I'm glad he doesn't get bullied by soccer moms anymore.

Attached: 1550039682466.jpg (1932x2576, 498K)

I miss BFG. I hope he's happy.

its not a white issue my man its a woman issue

the absolute best way to get your woman into carrying. Tell her you can't be there all the time and she needs to learn how to defend your kids.

Instant momma-bear mode: activated.

>LARP thread.

>cpr works on her son
That means he probably didn't need it. It's not for unconsciousness, it's for pnb dudes and airway obstructions that result in unconsciousness. One's hyper-specific, and the other is almost always going to require defibrillation for any effect.
>tfw I managed to get 70,000$
Of course that's assuming it's real at all.

Metisbro?
Sorry for being a newfag.

It must hurt having legitimate retarded family members, not even joking. This is straight up one of those conversations were someone ignores everything you say so he/she can go along with their little pre-planned speech. Does she by any chance also have some nasty personality disorder?

Métis are Canadian mixed native/whites

About a year ago I moved and ran into a lesser powered version, I will call tee-ball mom (doesn't directly confront but uses power to get her way). Moved from a semui-rural area to a townhouse (it was 15 minutes from work instead of an hour).
>Be me
>Recently moved to townhouse
>Be quiet and not in the face of neighbors
>One day get the itch
>Want to go shooting
>Load up car and go shooting
>See one of my neighbors there
>Apparently a couple of them are gun owners
>Come back
>Unloading car
>Neighbor sees ammo box
>Engages tee-ball mom mode
>"You can have those here"
>"Sorry, but I am not hurting anyone"
>"Doesn't matter you are not allowed to have them"
>She shuffles her "dog" (some toy thing that could break 20lbs) back into her place
>Few weeks later
>Get notice from HOA board
>Fined $25 for violation of HOA agreement
>Finally break down and read HOA (stupid me for not doing right away).
>Nothing about guns at all
>Go to next HOA meeting
>Practically nobody there
>But guess who is on the board
>Guess who pushed through a change to the HOA agreement at the last meeting
>Well two can play this game
>Get together with gun owning neighbors
>Form collation
>Run for HOA Board as a group during next election
>Our group holds 4 out of 5 seats
>She manages to hold her spot (she has multiple votes for board members since she "owns" multiple places)
>Guess what happened to that gun rule she pushed through though
>Yup gone

The only other change we made as a group was to create an official "neighborhood watch" which required mandatory gun ownership and practice time.

10/10 grugpost

>HOA
I'm very sorry.

>HOA
I don't get it, couldn't you just refuse to pay? Will they evict you or something?

and then storm god clapped

>I'm very sorry
Don't be, since I am now the treasurer (I get a $100 month stipend for services as the most active board member), I not only am the one who handles the books, I was able to leverage my firm to do the non-profit tax return (if it wasn't obvious I am an accountant).

>couldn't you just refuse to pay
While they can't force me to leave, they could cut me off from services provided. Things like plowing and shoveling, mowing, pool, gym, landscaping, ect. If I don't keep some of that up on my own, I can then be legit fined via township ordinances.

Thanks mate.

You still need to administer it if you have the training

Did the unconscious kid have a palpable pulse? If so, you probably shouldn't be administering CPR.