That Was Easy
>Start a nuclear war
Chivalry
>Kill an enemy with a sword while wearing dress uniform
Two Birds With One Stone
>Kill 2 people with one bullet
Jody
>Get divorced while on deployment
Government Property
>Get in trouble for assaulting a boot
Medic
>Cure any alement with ibuprofen
Lowest Bidder
>Witness your rifle blow up in your own hands
Silent Night
>Get tasked with fire watch on christmas eve
Natural Selection
>boot carrying the Carl G. ammo exploded
Don't Ask Don't Tell
>Pop your black cherry
Gunslinger
>Complete 20 combat jacks
A Waste Of Time
>Have more friendly fire casualties than enemy fire casualties
Chestburster
>shoot a retreating enemy
Ricecooker
>torch a village
Bladder Commander
>hold your piss the entire sentry shift
Chemical Warfare
>unleash it on the enemy
Super Hero Landing
>Crush an enemy beneath you while falling from any height
Jurassic Park
>Destroy a museum while piloting an F-22
There's a snake in my boot!
>Hide Full Autos in the caskets of the dead to ship them back to the US
Fuck Geneva
>commit every war crime in existence
True Italian
>switch sides when things start to look bad for your side
Like my great-grandpa!
>survive through the war only using equipment designed before 9. November 1918 likes of which we're used in WWI
Valiant knight
>behave well on occupied teritorry; don't rape nobody, don't steal people's property, don't kill civilians who aren't part of a resistance movement etc.
Dalton Trumbo
>get wounded in such a way that you can't neither: talk, hear, move, see and otherwise function as a human being except you're concious and completely self-aware (for those 2 lazy 2 google this is a reference to the book Johnny Got His Gun)
A Man of Culture
>learn a new language
>Paranormal investigator
Open fire on shadows in the night
Logistics novice
>Use second canteen as piss jug
Saving Pvt. Grylls
>Drink from the piss canteen
Trust but verify
>Get piss tested three times in one week
45 Club
>Receive three article 15s during career
Biggus Dickus
>Get male SHARP instructor to laugh at sex joke
Titus Vaginus
>Get female SHARP instructor to laugh at sex joke
ANTMAN
>Successfully weaponized any ants by any means necessary
PERKELE!
>overdose in the battlefield
>Idle Hands
Manufacturer and detonate 3 mre bombs.
The Hand That Rocks The Cradle
>get Jody pregnant while in service
Nigger
>if it’s not bolted down, it’s mine
>poorfag
Obtain your first mosin
Girl Next Door
>Acquire a war bride from the local populace
Eyes on the prize
>get hired as a PMC for one side and switch sides when they start losing
Leaf blower
>kill ten Canadian
kek
>Holiday In Cambodia
Fuck an Arabs wife, don’t forget to pack her home...
Get Out of Here S.T.A.L.K.E.R.
>successfully complete a S.T.A.L.K.E.R. challenge
Get Out of Here, Stalker!
>successfully tail your oneitis without her or her boyfriend finding out
Animal Whisperer
>Get the FOB dog to bite your Squad Leader
Smuggler
>Get alcohol or any other contraband into/out of country
Just as the founding fathers intended
>Get a kill with a black powder weapon
>Turkish
Gas out your first Computer Science room with your dreadful BO
Hate speech
>Protest for guns in the UK
Weekend at Bernie's
>Use an enemy body as a prop
Missionary
>Cause a Sand nig to convert to Christianity
De Beers
>Make a necklace of ears
"Bonus"
>Sell that necklace for way more than it's worth
fucking GET
If a tree falls...
>kill all surrendering combatants
colonization
>impregnate a female noncombatant
We got em
>plant a weapon on a dead civilian
Kebab Roast
>set a towelhead on fire
The Reich stuff
>get a kill with a dropped MP44
Artillery Qualified
>while moving, hit a bystander with a piss bottle
Hogtied
>zipcuff anyone
Look Ma, no hands!
>kill someone with an antipersonnel mine
Cattle Rustler
>kill local livestock
Smells like... victory
>10 kills using napalm/fougasse mines.
Catchphrase!
>make a one liner after a kill
Now you're just asking for it
>eat a Charm
>colonization
My great-grandfather got this one with a Jewish refugee girl during WWII.
That's not a knife, that's a spoon
>Kill an enemy with an MRE spoon
which year?
the pinochet maneuver
>steal an enemy helicopter mid-flight and force out it's occupants
THEY ARE IN THE FUCKING TREES
>get killed by an enemy hiding in foliage
hold this for me
>directly hit an enemy with a grenade
just like worms
>make a succesful animal suicide bomber attack
attack of the benis cat
>kill 100 enemies with an rpk
>The Navy Seal
Obtain 300 confirmed kills
>Heresy!
Kill any enemy of a different religion. Offer mercy if they pledge allegiance to your religion, scream HERETIC and kill them upon agreement.
>Exotic tastes
Suck at least 6 dicks from people from other countries. Each person must be different, not 6 people from the same 1 country.
>Thin your paints or I thin your ranks
Paint your primary weapon in a different colour, kill any officer.
>Thanks,Obama!
Be injured from Friendly Fire.
>The Emperor Protects!
Kill someone with your bayonet in a situation where you should of fucking died.
wut the fuck are you sayin OP?
this one is actually funny
Brass Hammer
>Find more than 6 uses for your ammo on the battlefield
So a Confederate soldier got Anne Frank pregnant?
/his/ was right all along!
pretty sure this is already an ongoing thing....
Payday
>Steal from the wallet of the person you killed.
this sounds like experience talking, user......funny as shit too
Not poor but...
>Defeat an opponent with any gun below 1$
Man I Love F***ing
>Succesfully teach a prostitute how to use a gun
Fecalicide
>Shoot your own poop for no apparent reason
Diamond hunt
>Get or create a militia mainly composed of blacks
Not intended for children
>Create a weapon made from toy parts (no nerf or legos)
Animal I have become
>Shoot yourself with a tranquilizer dart
Balk dental plan
>Brush your teeth with gun powder and oil
Old Mc user had a gun Ian, Ian, oh!
>Own a weapon that Ian hasn’t show yet
Uh oh...
>Get flanked
Gotcha!
>Successfully ambush 1 or more combatants
Fuck it
>Sit down, relax, smoke, eat and hydrate during a firefight
Toyota wars
>make 25 stunt and tafeet with Toyota hilux
American tax dollars
>wear 5.11 gloves and use m16 as primary and get a kill with laser guided missile as Isis
LT Dan
>Survive the war
>Prerequisites: have relatives or ancestors die in different wars
Battle hardened
>Get hard-on during a firefight
Welcome to the dangle zone
>You and your friends end up fighting without pants
Dive bomb
>Burn alive underwater
With satan and victorious weapons
>Blast black metal full volume while killing the enemy
Smell of death
>You no longer care about smell of rot
No pussy for corpse
>Get declined by whore because of death smell
Inaccurate statistics
>Kill your officer or nco and don't get caught
>battle hardened
Kek
Sides: orbit
Final Enemy
>An hero a few months after getting home.
Sides: orbit
>Blow someone in half. Hamburger style
Rommel Style
>capture one or more enemy squads while behind their lines
We Wuz Vikangz
>kill at least one enemy in CQC with an axe
Flottiglia X Mas
>keep fighting for your original side even after having switched sides. Prerequisites: True Italian
Hit or Miss
>return home to find your spouse took the children and all your belongings.
A Man Amongst Men
>kill ten Africans with a FN-FAL pattern rifle.
Leaf Blower
>kill ten Canadian soldiers
Limekiller
>kill ten british soldiers
Burger Flipper
>kill ten American soldiers
Knockoff Copies
>kill fifty Chinese soldiers
Roadblock
>kill ten Indian soldiers
Prohibitionism Enforcer
>kill a hundred Russian soldiers
underrated
I knew a Marine who carried a battle axe in combat. He was prior FFL. Dude was and likely still is a fucking maniac.
You're Gonna Go Far Kid
>Launch a child 15 feet with any explosive
absolute mad lad
kek
The Zone
>Desploy in Ukraine, and get assignated to The gray zone
G.I's Blues
>Has a A10 Pilot gunner, commit More than 8 friendly fire casualities
Just like in anime
>get or create a battle harem
Poo in loo
>force an indian soldier to shit in a toilet and then shout "IT'S TIME TO FLASH" and shoot the guy
Taxpayer Funded
>Use up $10,000 of equipment
Former FFL and joined the marines? The French marines? Still makes no fucking sense but ok
Can someone cap this for me? Am driving or would do it myself.
Shall Not be Infringed
>Kill 120 Federal Agent in Civil War mode
Pussy Melter
>torch a cat
Yellow Gatoraide
>Piss in teammates camel back
Gone but Not Forgotten
>Steal sensitive equipment from an officer and hide it
Company Hero
>Recover "lost" items and become a hero
The Switcharoo
>Switch peoples weapons onto fire without them knowing in chow hall line and yell at them for their lack of awareness
Good Company
>Get a two or more company grade article 15s
Ghost Gun
>Take peoples weapons when they are not looking and hide them while they panic.
Poopertrooper
>Masturbate in portapotty in 110+ degree weather in full battle rattle.
>Poopertrooper
Desperate fucking times m8
Disciplined Kebabs
>Shoot 5 surrendering enemies
>Desperate fucking times m8
Moron Labe
>Get killed with your own gun
Oh shit I'm feeling it
>Get a kill while listening to music
No compromise
>Only use Heckler & Koch guns
Some compromise
>Only use one Heckler & Koch gun
My little Armalite
>Get 10 kills with an AR
Slotting floppies?
>Get a kill with a 3 1/2" floppy disk
Your name on this bullet!
>Kill your arch nemesis with a bullet that has his name etched into it
To whomever it may concern...
>Get 5 kills with a single grenade
Dear grid coordinates...
>Get 10 kills with a single artillery strike
Where did user go?
>Grab your SKS and hide in the woods for the duration of the war.
That one thread
>Capture a deer and violate it with a dildo. You monster.
>...and the horse you rode in on.
Kill an enemy combatant while he is violating livestock
Hot piece of ass
>Blow and enemy’s lower half off
Gorilla Warfare
>Destroy the local zoo
Animal Mother
>Adopt an abandoned pet
WHAT?
>Forget your ear pro
X marks the spot
>Lose an eye
Pyrotechnical
>Ignite a civilian vehicle
Nice carrier, douchebag.
> smoke out a city block
Nah, you got the indian one wrong
>Urban janitor
Kill 10 Indian soldiers
Sic semper tyrannosaurus
>Kill a memeber of an invading army with a dinosaur bone
PERKELEPERKELEPERKELE
>Overdose on amphetamines during a firefight
Hey you, you're finally awake...
>Wake up in a vehicle with no recollection of how you got there
This machine kills fascists...
>Kill an enemy with a guitar
...well this machine kills commies
>Kill an enemy with the last round in a M1 Garand chambered in .308
Vlad was here
>Find corpse impaled to the ground
Elven hunter
>Kill 10 Finns
Gay hunter
>Kill 10 Swedes
Soul of warrior
>Eat heart of an enemy
Dick head
>Wear a beret
Cunt head
>Wear a side cap
Nothing changed
>Drop gay bomb to sweden
Destroyer of the sacred places
>Burn more than one Finnish sauna
Just a flesh wound
>Lose four limbs and surive
Johnny got his gun
>Lose all limbs and whole face including his eyes, ears, teeth, and tongue
Give johnny a gun
>Make someone to lose all limbs and whole face including his eyes, ears, teeth, and tongue
The Bigger They Are...
>kill an enemy armed with.a .50cal+ weapon
...The Harder They Fall
>with a .50cal+ weapon
A weapon to surpass metal gear...
>Assemble and arm a technical
Boss get down.
>Successfuly hide from an attack helicopter.
Master Chef.
>Disable an enemy vehicle with any sort of fire and a grenade.
Dodge This
>Spend your first full paycheck on a Dodge Charger
Thank Me For My Service
>Regardless of the topic, make every conversation about your time in the military
Just Pretending To Be Retarded
>Get accused of stolen valor
Remove Kebab
>successfully clear a building of Muslim inhabitants
Brazilian Bootlegger
>Kill an enemy with any homemade gun you found
Militaristic Weeb
>Get your fellow soldiers to enjoy any anime series
They Belong to us, Now
>Capture the Falklands as any countries army that isn't Argentina or the UK
Malicious Kindness
>While serving in a country with a starvation issue, throw the worst MRE food you have and water bottles with piss and drink-mix mixed into it.
"I could've sworn I already killed that man!"
>Kill two Chinese soldiers
>throw the worst MRE food you have and water bottles with piss and drink-mix mixed into it to the children who harassed your fellow soldiers
I think I'm retarded
>Last Defense
Claymore kill from sitting on a field shitter
Hi Guys
>Get a kill using antique French milsurp
Donkey Show
>Get a kill using anything dubbed "donkey dick"
No Tactical Advantage Whatsoever
>Write on/decorate your rifle
EEEEEEEEEEE
>frag your CO with a "negligent" discharge
Keep and Bear Arms
>take a downed enemy's limb as a trophy
Fucking metal
Make love not war
>get laid in a military vehicle
What In The Goddamn?
>Kill the person who shot you
37? In a row?
>Hook up with a barracks rat