Nearest object to your right is now the base for your makeshift weapon

can someone provide a picture of a pillow filled with nails? that'd be funny.

It is now a car of peace.
Inshallah.

>pillow filled with nails
>not already having a sack of door knobs

I have a key. I'll be fine with a shank.

>electric fan

There's a lot of things to my right.

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the knife is the closest thing, so i suppose u'd be fine.

I have my Glock 19 on so I’m fine.

Toilet roll :(

spoon warfare is neither outdated nor obsolete

Chapstick. a single stick of chapstick.

I’m screwed

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historically, meat fighting has been quite effective when the meat is taught martial arts

with enough patience you can make this into a biological weapon.
sharpen it.

Stop being an uncreative faggot.
Let it rot for a bit and poison their wells.

Picture related
I also have a pillow, maybe if we just close our eyes it'll all be over soon.

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>OI! you fakkn wanka, ewe bedda ave a loicence fa dat.

Gattling gun?

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what is that, a pube mixer?

well currently, in front of me on my computer desk is my S&W shield 2.0 9mm and my S&W SD40VE .. Im fine...

imagine being too retarded to even follow the easiest instructions

Pencil sharpener

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Toilet paper.

Frankly I'd rather use the turd in the toilet...

when you play hide and seek, do you wait for the kid to stop counting before you tackle him?
that'd be a tiny ass minigun then.

22lr is like a hoard of angry bees

>smith and wesson model 36
>a box of .38 special
>two boxes of 7.62x39
>all of them are on my left
guess I'm making a weapon out of a wireless gamecube controller

oh no

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youtube.com/watch?v=jvo86AHovFc&t=15s

a coke bottle (plastic) and some office supplies, plus my phone Ig

You fucking degenerate he's making beef jerky chew

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>taking a shit at work
>Isis shows up and starts blasting
>I grab a toilet paper roll, plunger, and some handsoap
>mold the tp into a barrel and receiver
>use my shit as clue
>plunger handle is stock
>soap propellent firing wads of tp
>Kill all the sand people
>get knighted for my heroics

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>loaded magazine

Ha, I think I can find something to go with this.

Fire extinguisher. Not the best but is good for distraction and blunt force trauma.

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that looks like it's made out of JB weld.

I have a staple gun by me, it makes a good base for a zip gun i think

>a loaded USP
I'll be just fine.

It is odd and impressive that you had this gif ready.
*runs to the store to buy a hat*
*tips hat unto you,good sir*
*returns hat*

Does the gun on my right hip count?

Please tell me that dog gets to ride in the paddle car.

>Ti-89
I mean, they're sturdily built, but as a bludgeon I'd rather use my fist. I guess there might be a way to make it into a taser, but I've got no ideas how to start that.

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PTO from a Kenworth. If i wrap a chain around it would make a Good flail.

>>
>one of those pelican knockoff apache cases

i suppose i could pull a hotline miami, may not be too bad.

Just enter "5318008" and show them. While they are amazed at your puerile ingenuity, shoot them.

>Use the calculator as a taser
No you're supposed to calculate the enemy into defeat, faggot.

>calculate the enemy
So bad guy+boolet=no bad guy?

Off an Eaton? Drain some of fluid out and make a flamenwërfer. Always had a weed sprayer near by for Zep, could kill em with that too.

i will kill them with my blanket.

>"first object to your right..."
>Jow Forums
It's guns.

youtu.be/ZuS3G7YKrj4

>why
SHALL

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Yes my child.

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>Jow Forums
>hasgunz

true k/amando

Could throw the shavings in their face, a la pocket sand.

How do I weaponize a book?

my gun is to my right within arms reach

i think i'm finally safe in one of these threads

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the good boye rides it as much as he wants

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I have a witness 10mm on My chest rn as I lay in bed. I think that’ll be fine.

A cheap drone with a camera on it that syncs to an app on my phone.
Looks like I'll be doing recon/spotting for mortar strikes

with your brain

I think when I finally snap I'm going to strap two of these to my head like the beer can hats and go on a mass shooting, only to finish myself off by sucking them down and going into shock from the brain freeze then slip into a diabetic coma so they can't prosecute me but are forced to keep me alive for years.

>That pic
I can literally feels my toes tingling when I look at it

LR Access Point I'm fucked

I audibly keked

Dick replacement

Oh. Looks tasty. I'll have to get one after work.

Laying in bed with my p226.

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I've got a phone charging cable, a cz 75 in its box with 4 loaded mags and 50 loose rounds, and a bastard sword hanging on the wall all equally close to my right. What will I need the weapon for?

>Kitchen table.

Add wheels, an engine, flame thrower and spikes. Ride into the wasteland with Wagner playing over loud speakers.

Dick Sharpener

Pic related

To your right, you illiterate retard

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A double barrel coach gun and a .22 starter pistol? OK?

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>A mattress
Its been fun guys but im severely fucked

Can of soup.

Shit.

My basic fender bass. I will club them with music

>asphyxiation
>burning the foam for toxic fumes

>Hard, heavy piece of metal that can produce sharp edges

Why is everyone such an uncreative brainlet on here?

>DURR I PULL TRIGGER I KILL ELSE TOO COMPLATE FOR TRUGG

Divide them by 0

Soup guy here.

I should have elaborated. The can is empty.

Eh, could still fold it over several times and make a rigid shank

Ti-Lite 4. Well...

black hands made this post

not him but you are actually retarded lol, he's talking about the edges not the weight from the contents

You still have the sharp edge on the lid and a mean boxing glove.

I didn't steal the soup or get it from welfare, so, no, not black.

East German AK bayonet.
I'll just assemble an improvised weapon using some string, an AK, and my bayonet.

Something something pen mightier than the sword

He didn't say he has a pen you fucking retard read his post again