>Rape Dwarf is 5 times as strong as you
>Rape Dwarf is twice as fast as you
>Rape Dwarf is only 4-feet tall
The catch is, you have the budget of 500 dollars you can use to buy stuff to defend yourself. The Rape Dwarf will try to rape you at complete random throughout the week.
What do?
>Pic unrelated
buy a step ladder and invest the rest
Spend 500 dollars on lube,rose petals, and handcuffs,then attach myself to a bed with my lubed up asshole exposed and wait for my free dick :D
they cant rape you if you consent
this, can't rape the willing.
also >Rape Dwarf is twice as fast as you
>Rape Dwarf cums twice as fast as you
>Proceed to turn around and fuck rape dwarf
checkmate athiests
A chastity belt.
Buy a bus ticket to the middle of nowhere and laugh at the thought of some faggot trying to run 1,000 miles by foot.
If they're 5x as strong can they jump 5x as high? Important question
Hand grenade (for point defense)
Spend the rest on whatever I can that has an effective greater than 10 yards.
Literally just lock my doors and shoot through them if the fucker tries to break in. This is the one time where benching 80 lbs max is a good thing.
I am the Rape Dwarf.
The dwarf can't rape you if you rape the dwarf
Yeah
user dont rape the dwarf he has AIDS NO
Did you just watch goblin slayer?
>tie grain mill stone to rope
>climb to second floor and go to window
>wait for midget to appear below
>whistle to make him look up
>drop stone on his head and pull stone back up by the rope
Pocket the $500 and use my AR to blast the nigger when he breaks into my house.
>Buy a shovel, a box of matches, some gasoline and a gas-can, batteries, radio, a hatchet, a knife, rope, tent, twine, food, water.
>Go innawoods.
>Create a system of pitfall traps, snares, and tripwires.
>Set up camp
>Ward off larger animals using radio music.
>Comfy as fuck
>Wake up to sound of screaming Rape Dwarf.
MFW 4 foot tall rape dwarf cant get out of the 7 >foot deep pit I dug because for all his speed and strength he is ultra manlet
>MFW I pour the gas can on him, throw it down, and toss a lit match
>MFW I turn on my phone for the first time all week and "I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE AND I BRING YOU... FIRE!" blares from my phone.
>MREs
>Tins of tuna
>ziplocks, Gatorade, gallons of water
>shipping container
>.380 pistol x2
>put everything in shipping container
>padlock container shut from the inside
>wait a week
>if the niggers only 5x as strong as me there’s no way he’s getting in
>if he does, magdump one pistol into him
>if he keeps going, magdump the other into myself
Failing that just get in my car and go on a road trip
WTF even is this thread and why is it om Jow Forums.
Clearly a practical, realistic, self-defense/strategy thread.
I would buy one(1) five-hundred dollar can of Rape Dwarf Repellent.
Checkmate.
Been reading Theozoology again I see.
AP 30.06 / 308 is the minimum caliber I'd trust against rape dwarfs with access to metal.
Based and good taste in music
>$500
Things I'll need: a shovel, a bear trap, chain, a chemical suit, and all the lube I can buy with what money is left.
First I dig to the entrance of my septic tank. Then, I open it, get in my chemical suit, and paint the septic walls with lube so it can't scurry out. Then I set up the trap, attach the chain to it, and cover it with leaves. Once the wapey little shit appears, I lead it towards the trap, hopefully trap it, and get my truck. I attach the chain to my vehicle, I drive over my septic tank, and detach the chain quickly once it is in. I then shut the septic tank, chain the entrance to it, and cover it with the dirt. Rape dwarf: contained.
Use the $500 to hire a Consent Giant, I guess?
Or buy a crate of 7.62x39, rape dwarves are tough as dick but they aren't invincible.
>Buy gym membership
>Train to become six times stronger
>Crush the rape dwarf with my hands
make home made napalm and flamethrower with scrap shit
otherwise i'll just put whatever else i have into the cheapest shotgun i can find, and mow them down with buckshot