I think it depends on your state of mind and being accepting of your situation. I've never had an IRL relationship, just a few immature online ones with a couple of foreign girls (one in retrospect I think wasn't even a girl, probably a fat sweaty Greek guy named Hercule WhatsApping me between taking orders in the back of his gyro truck), but I have a mild brain disorder. I'm not bad looking face-wise but my body is awful, I have some ticks, I talk fast and sometimes stutter, I recognize I'm an off putting dude. I'm also very monogamous with my friendships, I always only have one very close friend at a time I spend all my time with, I hate overspreading myself socially, I get uncomfortable, more nervous, and more off-putting because of it. I was realistic with my situation as far as sex and girls go.
Anyway once hookers were available to me, and realizing I'm not bound by the standards of the normies, because I'm outside of them and socially beneath them, I figured I want sex, not a girlfriend, and I could pay 50 Euros and get it. Rather than force myself out into uncomfortable situations, spending money on drinks, embarrassing myself drunk, all in hope of setting my sights low and banging a girl I find physically unattractive to lose my virginity and satisfy some normalfag sense of honor, I paid 100 Euros to get sucked and be ridden by a tall, big-tiddy blonde in Amsterdam, the sort of chick who'd never even look at me out in the wild.
I was super happy, because for me, it's not about validation, who the fuck do I have to impress? I banged a big titty blonde, and how I did it doesn't matter. As to if it changed me, yeah a bit. Regardless of if I had to pay for it, I feel a bit less self conscious that I at least know what being in a pussy feels like, and with an 8/10 girl as well. Like I said, maybe it's different depending on your social situation, but I have no IRL friends, no family but mom and granny, etc. Just be realistic and do what feels good.
Attached: sade thought.jpg (850x400, 59K)