My gf stumbled upon my Jonbenet folder

Brody Rogers
Brody Rogers

My gf stumbled upon my Jonbenet folder. She seemed creeped out.
What excuse can I give for having a Jonbenet folder?

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Jordan Russell
Jordan Russell

Just tell her you are a pedo.

Brayden Butler
Brayden Butler

LOLOLOLOL

Nice going dude. Just tell her youre investigating the case.

Leo Perry
Leo Perry

Amateur detective?

Ayden Ortiz
Ayden Ortiz

Why the fuck do you have said folder OP? Are you autistic? Pedo? Something else?

Michael Adams
Michael Adams

This is now not ending well in extreme slow motion. Double RIP. gfs are harbingers of doom doom doom

Isaiah Bailey
Isaiah Bailey

Just tell her youre investigating the case
Hope she doesn't know it got solved

Josiah Ross
Josiah Ross

"I had a real obsession with that case a while back. Just forgot to delete the pictures related to the case"
my gf
get out normie! REEEEEEEEEEE

Anthony Sullivan
Anthony Sullivan

You're an cold-case detective now.

Wyatt Martinez
Wyatt Martinez

Begin vigorously trying to convince her you didn't kill her.

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Gavin Taylor
Gavin Taylor

Come on, get into the van kid

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Ryder Ortiz
Ryder Ortiz

I'm afraid to google for it and get into a list. What is it about?

James Edwards
James Edwards

Not too long ago I caught a TV news story about the JonBenet Ramsey mess out in Colorado. I'd read about the episode earlier in the NY Times, and aside from a certain revulsion to the sordid details I'm certain all readers felt, I really hadn't reacted to or thought much about the case. But there on the TV screen was footage of JonBenet herself performing at a pageant- all dolled up in mascara, lipstick, pearls, vamping for the camera, and to be perfectly blunt about it, using some very adult sexual cues. It then crossed my mind is it entirely inappropriate that a healthy adult male respond to sexual stimuli that mimic almost perfectly those of a healthy adult female?
Note that I used the words "respond to" not the words "act upon" - the distinction is crucial. It's obviously not appropriate for anyone to have sex with a child that young, but is it wrong to desire it, or at any rate to manifest some of the symptoms of that desire?

Nolan Jones
Nolan Jones

Consider the following hypothetical situation A man is sitting in front of a roaring fireplace after a superb evening meal, enjoying the last glass of '86 Latour. There is absolutely nothing on his mind more serious than trying to decide between a sniffer of Remy Martin Napoleon or Hennessy X.O. cognac. Outside a horrible winter storm rages. Nursing the last sip or two of wine, he crosses the room to a window near the liquor cabinet and amuses himself for a short while by watching the helpless passers by several stories below bending over against the wind, wading through slush, falling on the ice, etc. . He pours a generous snifter of cognac and before returning to his fireside armchair punches a TV remote to catch a weather update. Sipping his cognac, he nods off to sleep and awakens just in the middle of the JonBenet news story. Not knowing of the horrible crime committed, he watches her little pageant number, entranced. At the end of the number she turns and faces the camera, smiles and ever so subtly lip-syncs the words "fuck me". Now at this precise point in time and under these circumstances is it wrong for the man to feel his penis start to stiffen? It's an interesting question, but one I gave no more thought to till I caught a new product announcement in one of the European business journals I subscribe to.

Josiah Turner
Josiah Turner

Pretty fucked-up case of a child model getting kidnapped and never being seen again. The whole thing's been unsolved for ages now. 1996, I think.
There was supposedly a ransom note, and they've submitted DNA samples from the cum that dripped out of her into her panties, but nobody's actually made arrests. Bear in mind, too, that DNA evidence wasn't even that good at the time of the case. The family isn't considered suspect by the cops, and there are a ton of conspiracy theories surrounding the whole thing.
Personally, I think whoever did it is too powerful and untouchable to face consequences, but then again, I'm a pizzagater.

Wyatt James
Wyatt James

mysterious murder of some girl named jonbenet ramsey. there's a similar case in britain, this guy mr. gunk has researched it.

youtube.com/watch?v=_0AuBVd7NjM

Kevin Mitchell
Kevin Mitchell

Well, she was a qt.

Samuel Smith
Samuel Smith

It turns out that a German company, Cybernetika A.G., has completely cornered a heretofore unrecognized market with the introduction of their Cyber-Fraulein 3000 which has to be the world's most absolutely high-tech love doll. In fairness to the company, I should point out that their own literature stresses that the CF3000 is sold only to bona fide law enforcement agencies and penal institutions for the purpose of rehabilitating repeat criminal pedophiles. Well, we will see.
The customer base for the United should prove interesting for some marketing whiz at Cybernetika has made the doll a perfect life-size replica of, you guessed it, JonBenet Ramsey herself. Now German companies are not known for their sense of humor, macabre or otherwise, but when my tears of laughter had dried I realized I had to examine one of these dolls. I got a hold of Dieter von Stroelitz, executive V.P. of Cybernetika and was given the sad news Yes, at this time CF3000 is sold only to law enforcement agencies in the U.S., but in Europe the sales are a bit more "relaxed" as he put it. No problem, an old family friend is county sheriff in a midwestern state that shall go nameless. Call him "Earl", not his real name. Despite being law Earl has a great sense of humor, and has come through before with nifty toys like cans of mace and the odd submachine gun from a drug bust. A nice guy to know. I gave him a call and he said what the fuck, if he doesn't have to fork over any cash he'll get one. A couple of months later I get a call from him and he's laughing so hard he can hardly talk. "Get your ass out here to see this" is about all I can make out. I borrowed a buddy's Merc, grabbed a few bottles of Jack Daniels and got out of town on I-80, cruise set at 75 mph.

Dylan Wilson
Dylan Wilson

I've been following the McCann case since '08, and I'm convinced it was the Podestas.

Well THAT's fucking creepy.

Dylan Adams
Dylan Adams

This doll is a piece of art. The skin and muscle tissue are a new DuPont polymer marketed as "Dermastyrene". The skin is eerily soft and lifelike. CF3000 uses thousands of small nichrome heating wires throughout the body that connect to a central heating element (110v. AC) that raises the body temperature to a nice 98.6 F. Reprocessed shark cartilage forms the "skeleton", and all joints are fully functional including jaws, neck, and hips. Even the internal organs are accurately represented by silicone filled sacs. Weight 68 lbs. , height 4'3". Hair is real, human, long and blond. JonBenet comes dressed in white anklet socks, cowboy boots, short blue denim skirt, white satin crotch less panties (!), light blue halter top, and beige cowboy hat. Hair and makeup are perfect. Additional outfits are available from the manufacturer. A small set of batteries (which recharge as JonBenet warms up) is provided for playback of about 30 recorded voice messages. A set up dip switches near the AC outlet control language (English, Norwegian, German, Swedish, or Dutch) and message playback mode Auto, Manual or Off. Auto provides random playback. In Manual mode a gentle tug on JonBenet's cute ponytail elicits a message. Some of them are real gems. "I'm wearing my crotch less panties just like you wanted Daddy" or "Ooooh, you're so BIG inside me Daddy" were two of my favorites. In both Auto and Manual mode occasional moans and whimpers are added. Sound quality is superb.

Nicholas Hall
Nicholas Hall

The company literature states that "all three of the sexual orifices are fully functional and incredibly lifelike." I asked Earl, "Hey, you give her a whirl yet?" He took a long pull from my last bottle of Jack and sneered at me, "Shit boy, I wanted to save her cherry for you." There remained the obvious problem of how to test this doll. We thought a little bit, and I asked him, "Who you got in the cells upstairs?" "Already working on it," he replied. There was a knock on the door and a junior deputy came in and handed Earl a file. He started thumbing through it. "Lets see, we got here one Rafael Hernandez, visiting us for grand theft auto and possession with intent to sell, his ass goes up to Joliet in a couple of weeks, two priors for sexual assault on a minor. He's our man!"

Owen Long
Owen Long

My job now was to prep JonBenet for sex. I plugged her in to warm up and found the 3 "body fluid" boxes. Each box held 20 or so plastic packets of fluid for each of her three orifices. There was a simulated saliva with a kind of minty odor for her mouth, a slimy goo labelled "vaginal lubricant", and an incredibly funky grease for her little butt hole. I put on latex gloves and applied the three packets as instructed. Earl came back downstairs and let me in on the plan. There was a small kitchen and lounge on the first floor. A one way mirror in the lounge allowed officers to watch the room from a hidden hallway near the duty desk. Rafael had been told he could mop the kitchen in return for extra exercise room time, and had readily agreed. When JonBenet was fully warmed up I carried her to the lounge and had her "nap" on the sofa with her little blue denim skirt hiked up to reveal a generous portion of her white satin panties. The effect was damn good, I had to admit. Earl got one of the female officers to sit with Jon Benet and pretend to work on a crossword, while a deputy got Rafael in leg irons and led him down to the lounge and kitchen. When he came in the female officer whispered to Rafael, "Try not to make much noise, her parents were killed in a car wreck and we just finally got her asleep." Rafael nodded silently in reply. He began to putter around in the kitchen then started mopping the floor. After about 5 minutes another officer stuck his head in the lounge and addressed the female officer, "Martha, phone for you, line two". Martha said "Thanks" and got up and left the room, closing the door behind her. Rafael peeked through the kitchen doorway, nervously looking around. Earl and I watched through the one-way. Outside the lounge door six deputies waited with batons, pepper spray, and stun-guns. Rafael got a dust mop from the kitchen closet and started pushing it around the lounge floor till he was next to JonBenet's sofa.

Liam Moore
Liam Moore

"He's gonna take the bait, I can feel it", said Earl.
Rafael sure as hell looked nervous. Beads of sweat on his forehead, licking his lips, his eyes darted about the room.
"Look, he's got a hard on", I whispered.
"Earl counted, "One, two, three..."
At 3 1/2 seconds Rafael let out a subhuman cry, dropped the dust mop, and grabbed JonBenet by the throat, picked her up, and slammed her head against the top of a heavy oak table.
The blow would have easily killed a 6 year old. Rafael dragged her waist up to the table edge, tugged her panties down (I guess he was too eager to notice they were crotch less), unzipped himself and got down to business.
"When to the cowboys come in?" I asked Earl.
From the look on Rafael's face, that wouldn't take too long. After less than five minutes of furious strokin', he pulled out and shot three monster wads across her peach fuzz, denim skirt, and halter top. He pushed the body forward and the table and rolled her over on her side with her ass near the table edge. He dropped to his knees and started tonguing her little butt hole.
"Get him", Earl barked into his radio. The lounge door burst open and Rafael stood up and tried to get his tool back in his trousers, but the two deputies with stun guns were on him too fast. After a few zaps Rafael was on the floor, and the stun gun detail stepped quickly aside. Three deputies with batons worked him over while one with pepper spray stood off to one side shooting the liquid in his eyes and mouth as he screamed. When they figured all the fight was out of him, they stood him up and cuffed his hands behind him. Martha, who had been "baby sitting" JonBenet went over to her and felt her wrist.
"I'm not getting a pulse", she announced.
"I didn't mean to kill her, so help me God!" Rafael pleaded.

Austin Martin
Austin Martin

Earl strode into the lounge while I stayed at the mirror. "Get that piece of shit back in his cell", he ordered. Two of the deputies hustled Rafael, penis still dangling from his fly, out of the lounge and over to the elevator. It didn't take too long for the general population to learn that he raped and killed a 6 year old girl while being trusted with cleaning duty. Poor Rafael, it seems he cut himself pretty bad shaving the next morning. Bled to death, in fact.
Earl had all sorts of plans to use JonBenet as a decoy in a couple of local spots. I would have loved to hang around and check it out, but my buddy needed his car back. Martha had cleaned up JonBenet and tested the heating and voice functions. All OK. You gotta hand it to the Germans, they really know how to build shit.
On the drive back east I got to thinking. While Cybernetika had built her as a rehabilitation tool, it seemed to me that CF3000 was going to be much more of a hit as an entrapment vehicle for police, unless some liberal shithead poo-poos it in court. Also, I had to get a hold of Dieter von Stroelitz at Cybernetika to formally request (beg) that CF4000 be a full sized copy of Princess Diana. There must be tens of millions of men who would love to bend Lady Di over the side of the bed, lovingly adjust her tiara, then ram their stiffy dog up her shit chute while she whimpers "Ooooh, don't be too rough with me my little budgie," in that lovely British accent.

Jackson Butler
Jackson Butler

in this thread: creepy as, green text I have no moral or intelectual obligation to distill.
i have drank a lot of goat skins I don't sleep
look at this dude.
listening to which house
beam me up

Joseph Garcia
Joseph Garcia

that child obviously was born a boy
look at the face and you can tell

Jayden Lewis
Jayden Lewis

my face reading this thread
Rafael deserved his fate

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