ITT: Bone chilling phrases

>so, user, what are your hobbies?
>what music do you listen to?

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>when are you gonna get a grilfriend?
>Are you married?
>Do you have kids?
>I bet you have girls throwing themselves at you
>What is 8 x 7?
>What's 1565 - 78?
>What did you study in College?
>What's your Political leaning?

Protip: never answer any of that shit, just be as vague as possible.

>How are you?
>What's new?

>I doesn't matter that I don't have any friends now....
>I'll make plenty in college
>a new start

>"Hey user, how are you doing?"
>Uh, Um, I'm doing okay
>"You sure don't sound okay"
Just fuck my shit up senpai

>Hey, we need to talk.

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jesus this isnt a big deal
>Im really into a lot of brazillian music right now, but im usually listening to electronic music

>dont you like diversity, user?
>you're not racist are you?
>no the fathers not around

No human being on earth has ever said these words to you.

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This. I'm 21 and I literally DO NOT KNOW how you are supposed to reply to these questions. Telling people about my hobbies or what kind of music I listen to is fine.

>what shows do you watch

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>I volunteer at soup kitchens
>80s rock

easy peasy

i like dabbin, and hitin dem folks.
i be lisnin to dat lit shit ayee.

>So, user, what do you do in your free time?
I don't want to say vidya and Jow Forums. Any believable lies?

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Say "poo poo pee pee".

Dubs don't lie. You have been muted for 2 seconds, because your comment was not original.

But I'm not an ultratard

>wow user your bones are cold
I suffered from malnutrition and someone actually said this

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>writing
>everything

>never
>no
>no
>twice
>56
>stop
>no
>i don't know enough to talk about that

>so user what do you do for a living
>do you have a gf
>user you smell bad

Why don't you just lie?

>why do you always look so tired.

Say what I say, which is watch netflix. Normals go crazy for netflix, as if it's their god or something. You become infinitely relatable if you admit to wasting free time on netflix. If they ask which shows, say Stranger Things or Friends.

>i'm alive
>nothing
>then, talk
>as in
>i am
>that's not uncommon
>i don't
>listen to music and or write
>that's because i'm dead inside
>insanity
>no
>news to me
>i don't sleep much

>why dont you have a gf? Are you gay or something?

>i have an artist's attraction to humans
>so, no