Magic to increase testosterone

Ohooo, a brave young lad!
I have met many like you, and cursed many more to the life of a high est beta!
Perhaps you will be rewarded, with high test!
But first, three riddles.
I shall deliver the first!
[whistles a strange jingle on panpipes, a stone in the wall shifts, and the rest follow, revealing a small chamber lit by torches. A wooden gate stands at the opposite end, you follow the sprightly imp into the chamber and find the entrance has closed behind you]

Oh five over one hundred
or 15 hundredths into three
my life was a tale as old as these cobwebs
I've gathered on my person you see
First heed my word of warning
my quest for beauty is what killed me

So, young lad, Who Am I?????
[Whistles a strange tune on the panpipes, the torchlight dims]

RICH PIANA?

CORRECT
[The sprightly imp appears slightly unhappy, the wooden gate opens revealing a wooden room lit with gasoline lamps with an iron gate at the opposite end. As you enter, you find the gate as disappeared, and the wall is flush wood paneling. The imp follows.]
I see you think you are a CLEVER boy, don't you traveler?
While few have answered correctly the first of my riddles three, fewer still have answered the second, and none the third!
I shall have your testosterone to feed to my many, many sons. You shall be cursed with high est for life!
But first, my second riddle.
[He plays an odd, minor-keyed tune on his panpipe and the kerosene light in the room dims. You note a reddish glint in his eyes, his grin appears more malicious than jolly]

Too many are aware of their posterior
Gym thoughts and thots galore
Too many still are focused on their anterior
peen size, symmetry, and more

But what of these lateralities,
The obliques and abstracts?
What of the angles we don't usually work
in our abdominals and lower backs?

I'm seeking a lift to build them
These slides and shifts and turns
With one step on over
take an airplane to see a white rabbit
We shall find out how much you have learned

WHAT LIFT AM I?????

Jefferson Squat

Based and redmagepilled.

CORRECT
[The sprightly imp is visibly angry. His eyes glow red, his grimace reveals unnaturally numerous needle-pointed teeth. The iron gate slides open, and you follow him through to a strange dungeon, with walls of shining steel with no visible rivets, and an ambient glow with no discernible source.There is a golden and jeweled door opposite to where you entered. The iron gate behind you fades, and you see there is no escape behind you.]
OH TRAVELER.
OH STUPID, STUPID TRAVELER.
What a shame to have been so successful, and made it so far, and yet to be cursed to bitch tits and birthing hips. For none have made it past this final riddle.
I shall have your test to feed my sons. I shall have your muscles and flesh to bake my bread. See if your feeble mortal brain can stumble through this riddle, boy.
[He spits angrily over the panpipes, making a strange, staccato tune. The light in the room dims.]

You'll find me in my study
In my parlour or my den
I wear clothes of fine formality
And eat the richest foods of your sorry land

I've occupied many roles
as a voice of reason in the din
as an advisor to the masses
as a judge of the contents of small tins

I shall welcome you twice a fortnight
I will define your hope and goals
I have even just appeared to advise
A president of your nation of fools

WHO AM I?

Zyzz

reviewbrah

/v/ get outta here

INCORRECT
The imp laughs as you collapse to the floor. Your gains visibly diminish, your nipples grow sensitive and puffy, and your hips widen.
There's always trap mode.

CORRECT
The door crashes open and the imp screams, his skin sizzles in the sunlight from outdoors. You emerge into the world with double test. Enjoy, traveler. Enjoy.