I am sure some of you have these bad boys, what exercises really piss off your butt boys?

Have one lurking around. Was incredibly bad in the past but I've cut back on the number of times I shit so I don't wreck my ass wiping.

fibers (meme)

you should've been squatting with a plug

Squats and Deadlifts, because of the pressure on your body or someshit like that. I know that almost every powerlisfter has them.

I had em really bad a couple years ago. An absolute nightmare. I was shitting blood every single morning after my first shit. Drink plenty of water lads. I'm not ashamed to say that lubing up your asshole before you take your first shit in the morning before you've had a chance to properly hydrate works wonders.

Some externals, don't really feel or see them unless I go hiking or do prolonged walking. Also, I don't understand how people complain about pain. It doesn't hurt unless it's pumped to the max.

Got one a couple months ago that seems to have permanently changed the landscape of my asshole. Exercise doesn't seem to effect it much, but coffee...
So much lost blood. And if you eat salad and drink coffee at the same time it's like shitting razor blades covered in acid.

Cardio, it never really hurts, but during a jog or long walk I can feel if it's bleeding a little, it makes me uncomfortable.

I'm /fat/ (down 50lbs) so I'm hoping when I'm normal weight it'll help.

>Internal ones feel like nothing
I've had a huge one on the inside and it hurt like crazy. Felt like shitting out a flaming pineapple desu.

>Got one a couple months ago that seems to have permanently changed the landscape of my asshole
Same. I got some really bad ones a year ago and my asshole is still not the same. It's getting better slowly though

Never had a problem with these which was weird cause I started playing with huge didlos when was 19 and 20. Like bad dragon larges. Not sure if the early stretching had any affect on it.

Attached: 1555099876311.jpg (337x600, 13K)

I just want my pristine virgin asshole back, Jow Forums

Attached: 1548108044884.jpg (518x399, 50K)

Got my first one recently, was somewhat sore but not bad at all. I got it from curling way too much weight and not breathing properly. Some steroidal cream and witch hazel cleared it up and I am being more careful now.

>had a buttboy for the last 2 months
>went to doctor because I want my nice asshole back
>gave me some anal pills to shove up my ass and told me to take sitz bath with epsom salt
>used all my anal pills and epsom salt
>buttboy still there big as ever
It doesn't hurt me or anything but I'm going to the doctor again to have it surgically removed.

I fear this will be my fate

Why people have this stuff? Forcing the shit out?
Tell me more pls

Also; dont forget to drink extra water
People start eating more fiber but forget to incriese the water too

Pls respond :(

PLS RESPOND GUYS AM I TALKING TO THE VOID???

google, you mong

Heavy deadlifts and squats, not even meming, just stay in the 12 rep range.

Hemorrhoids, or piles, are twisted, swollen, varicose veins that occur in the anus and rectum. They are due to straining or pressure in the lower abdomen and though more common following childbirth or constipation, they can also result from working with weights. Hemorrhoids cause discomfort and pain but rarely result in serious illness.

Attached: wink.gif (500x284, 870K)

There's a study out there that claims that anal fisting reduces the risk of hemorrhoids. Not even a joke, my friend told me while he was in med school and we laughed our asses off.

Google you dumb faggot. Fiber helps so your shits are more solid. And itching your butthole too much does it. Fucking sucks when you're walking and feel something but can do anything to fix it. I used aloe, disciplined itching, got fiber gummies, kept hydrating. Haven't had an issue for quite a while.

post collection

Suffered from it last year. Couldn't bench for two weeks until it healed. From time to time when trying to get a PR I have a cold sweat on my back and fear raises strong.

Attached: 1532091805309.jpg (640x640, 44K)

Sometimes is the result of a false maneuver of the intra abdominal pressure when holding the air incorrectly at peak force.
Shit happens.

Attached: 1501620381261.jpg (667x720, 38K)

Eat some fiber, man. Nothing better than eating some fiber to ease the shit on the way out. Drink shit tons of water.

No exercise will affect your butthole, but thinking about being seated between sets it's pure pain.

Same here, since i was young. When I first got one, I assumed it was late stage cancer and resigned myself to dying without telling my family.

The worst one I ever had, I was in immense pain all day at school, then had a six hour shift on my feet at Tim Horton's. At one point I felt this house sense of relief, went to check it out, and it had actually burst, relieving all the pressure. I've never felt so good in my life, but Jesus did it bleed.

I've had an internal one.
It feels like someone literally has your colon in their grip and squeezing it.
It's hella uncomfortable for the first few days

>Internal ones feel like nothing
Wrong lol. I had and internal one that would hurt if I had a dry ass shit from not drinking enough water.

I bought syringes and I pop them. Fuck the police. I do what I want.

Also, do cayenne pepper in water. It fixed it for me. It’s been four years.

had em since i was like 14 from playing gameboy on the shitter too long

beat the elite 4 like 99 times tho

I have a ripped asshole. Anal fissures dude. I got them when I was just starting my teens and had them ever since. I used to shit blood when I was 8. Probably had them at that point to. Fuck dude, and not a damn thing I can do to fix it at this point besides surgery.

god damn sneezing while taking a shit is something I am going to be afraid of for the rest of my life

This whole thread is making me exceptionally nervous right now and I don't know why but I think I'm about to have a legit panic attack

IT CAN'T BE REAL THIS CAN'T BE REAL I CAN'T DEVELOP THIS AND IT WON'T HAPPEN YOU GOD DAMN FAGGOTS ARE DISGUSTING.

Attached: 1542296737563.png (598x512, 534K)

Had em ever since I got Crohn's, I shit 8-10 times a day. Had one that felt like a babysitter finger dangling off my pucker, got a little rough with wiping and that fucker exploded. Looked like someone dumped a gallon of cherry koolaid in the toilet.

Attached: 5AB1B78CC21F4BC3931D4C62CFFEE4E1.jpg (780x756, 132K)

*baby's, not babysitter...fuck phones

ur up next brotha

Attached: 1504581662042.jpg (480x393, 21K)

Playing with huge dildos makes you less likely to get hemorrhoids because your skin becomes more elastic and a larger or more intense shit than normal won't do anything to your ass.

>I assumed it was late stage cancer and resigned myself to dying without telling my family.

Attached: 6498222F-22DC-458F-9EC3-F8D7556C09F2.gif (310x233, 953K)

shit diets and have to sit on the toilet for 30 minutes to an hour, overweight, or they just sit on their ass all day and don't move around enough. Sitting on the toilet is also can indirectly cause them too since you pinch the sphincter when you sit, its optimal to squat or sit wide stanced on a toilet seat.

>Never had a problem
You gonna have 'em with the Lord, degenerate.

Attached: 1507527085229.jpg (1280x974, 304K)

based and godpilled

do you drink this mix or do you apply it to your butt boy

Ex-4th degree hemarrhoids owner here. Had the surgery. Lads you better fix ur assholes right fucking now because the healing process is likely the most painful thing you'll ever experience. Was screaming and crying like a psycho when i was taking shits the first week after surgery. I consider myself an injured veteran now

I used to shit bowls of bright red blood when I was running ~6 miles 4-5 days a week. Now I tow. Doctor stuck her finger in my butt and I giggled. She did not find it amusing.

Was it bad to begin with or did it progressively get worse? Cuz I have one now but it barely bothers me

Anyone have one that's like half internal half external? I have one that crosses my anal border, that little bastard was getting better but I did a big leg day yesterday and now he's mad AF again

Attached: 1461219958042.jpg (250x226, 9K)

Straining on the toilet too hard
Not getting enough fiber and taking rough shits
Frequent diarrhoea and shitting too often
Being the bottom during anal sex
Sitting in one position for long periods of time

i've developed one over the last 2-3 months i'm pretty sure, it's never painful but sometimes if i have a really big shit there's quit a lot of blood from the stretching i imagine

also doesn't help that my vyvanse raises my blood pressure which makes them worse

Can't you just cut it open to let the blood evacuates?

kek!

I never thought I'd get this because there's usually nothing wrong with me. Pro tip: DON*T wipe your asshole to relief itching, just trust me.

Squating on a dick for me.

they can remove it in an operation

>tfw internal AND external
>tfw had this since my early teens from sitting at computer so much
>tfw they got EVEN WORSE when I started lifting

Attached: 1459419656897.gif (500x374, 990K)

One thing I learned years ago is to inhale during the power phase and exhale during the gravity phase. Almost no one does this. Most people hold their breath and worse, “grunt” to lift more weight. You are essentially “cheating” by using your chest as a splint and massively increasing intrathroacic pressure creating a huge venous build up in your system as the blood can’t return to your heart. A recipe for creating hemorrhoids, hernias, heartburn (reflux), and aneurysmal subarachnoid hemorrhaging. Hope this helps. Back off on the weight and inhale.

>Hemorrhoid burst
>Now have flap of skin on my asshole
Contemplated just getting drunk and snipping that shit off with a pair os scissors soaked in vodka but thought better of it. Reckon I'll just go to a beautician's and have them lazer it off my ringpeice.
Don't drink beer, guys.

Pretty sure it's quite genetic. I have a gut condition which means im permanently constipated. Haven't had a normal movement in a decade yet never had any haemorrhoid.

You can just band it and that gets rid of it, quick easy operation. They really aren't a big deal.

I got one of these from fapping like 6 hours on adderall when I was like 15 but it went away on its own. I read online theyre supposed to be permanent.

Did I just get lucky or what?

Attached: CE9CD981-7867-427A-BFAE-F0EE3C5B4508.png (720x540, 385K)

>internal ones feel like nothing
>pain so intense you're unable to move for a day and even lying in bed hurts

I got one after eating a whole durian in Thailand. I got horribly sick and shat out my ass for the next three days and developed my one and only hemorrhoid during this time. That pain was unbelievable, and it felt like there was something alive in my intestines eating me from the inside out. Took about a week to clear out, but every time I shat (which was at least once an hour) it was like shitting liquid magma.

I got mine after dealing with salmonella food poisoning. I was shitting acid for 5 days straight.
Never really went away either.