"You died, and have been reborn in a Harem Anime RomCom! But wait... you're just a background character? Will you overthrow the protagonist to steal his waifus, or will you carve your own path in this new world? With the looming threat of [ERASURE] haunting you and a mystery that seems to keep unraveling, every choice you make matters."
A couple months ago I pitched this idea on this board, and a lot of anons seemed really interested. I got to work, and now I have a playable demo. There are multiple paths, and I'd love to hear what choices you make and any feedback that you may have! If you're bored, feel free to download the game and give it a play. It's pretty short.
I should mention that as of right now the art assets are all taken from free online sources, and I am looking for an artist. If you are at all interested, DM me on twitter @JayOrDev
Connor Anderson
bump this is a great idea op
Justin Martin
would you like a learned artist or an ameatur?
Camden Evans
Depends on whether or not the style fits, but I'm not particularly picky!
Jace Ross
I might hyu later haven't drawn in a while but this sounds like a fun project
Jaxon Smith
Looks pretty fucking interesting, user.
Downloading to check it out right now. If the thread is still up tomorrow or later tonight I'll drop by with some criticism, but I'm excited, to say the least.
Wyatt Rivera
Glad to hear it! And if the thread does happen to die, you are always welcome to leave a comment on my itch.io page or my twitter.
Carson Parker
Seems like an alright idea, I'll play it tomorrow op.
Brandon Kelly
It's good to see a fellow visual novel dev. I will play your game and tell you what I think.
Austin Richardson
Thanks! Where can I find your work? I'd love to play!
Austin Martinez
It's very possible that this thread will die in the time it takes for anons to play, so would anyone be interested in a discussion thread tomorrow? I don't want to spam the board about my game, but if there is interest I will make a thread tomorrow.
Carter Parker
Im not even 20 minutes in and this hurts. Fuck you and your game OP (will still be looking forward to updates)
Cool, I'll give it a playthrough user. Sounds like an interesting plot
Adam Butler
On the game, I was expecting something very bad, but I am pleasantly surprised. Let me go through things as they come to me.
The exact circumstances in the opening are unclear. The man claims to be a NEET freezing to death, but the scene shows a bench at day time. Could he not simply rest in a coffee shop? I like the effects. The snow was a nice touch, and so was the title card. The writing line to line is acceptable. The transition from death to new life is far too quick. Perhaps make the protagonist undergo some drowsy confusion upon awakening in class, or put a scene within to show the transition of his soul. He seems to take in his circumstances surprisingly quickly, but then just as quickly come back to his memories. Are you sure you want to use Japanese words for what could be said in English (bentou instead of lunchbox, kouhai instead of underclassmen)? The sound effects and music are not bad. Are they free assets as well?
That seems it for initial observations. Let me actually finish it before giving you the rest.
Thanks for the great advice, I totally agree! I haven't taken a close look at the beginning of the game in a while, so it would definitely be a good idea to sync it up with the rest of what I've written.
Also I'll check out your game ASAP!
Carson Adams
As for the music, I've sorta blatantly stolen it from other visual novels. I'm hoping to find a musician at some point and get original music.
Jose Stewart
It's good to have original assets. What your game is remembered for is the writing, the art, the music, the plot/choice structure. It's best to have everything be original, so when folks read your work, they're reading something that is solely yours (and your partners, of course). Default assets are good for now though, since this is a demo. Having a
Also, don't check out my visual novel ASAP. I've really been slacking on fixing some spelling errors. They should be done by 8 pm tomorrow.
Ganbare and good luck, JayOr
Angel Allen
Why do I have to be reborn irrrelent? I'm already irrelevant af. Anyway, you might as well release it for Android. Get some of that cash from Pookistan or designated shitting streets of India and get artist and musucian.
Nicholas Robinson
Messed up my post a little. I was going to say, obtaining a musician and artist is going to be a lot easier now that you have a proof of concept. Check the renpy forums. If you can't find anything up to your standards there (you probably won't, if I'm to be honest), then look for artists you like on tumblr and drawthreads here on the 4channels. Don't go to /ic/. As for musicians, there are many lurking right here in Jow Forums, but a great quantity of them can be found in /mu/ post your music threads and reddit's Jow Forumswearethemusicmakers. You'll probably have better luck contacting the artists/musicians individually rather than in the threads.
Ryan Thompson
Great advice, much appreciated. Oof, I guess it's time to legitimately get the ball rolling, huh? And I suppose I will definitely have to pay any artists I bring on board. Well, I believe in the project so it is worth it.
Liam White
Hey. I like the "generic" girl. I hope you release her as a serious romantic option and she isn't VN chads used goods like the rest of em
Your writing is pretty good. Once you get your own art and music, I think it'll be a great VN
Ayden Rodriguez
>I hope you release her as a serious romantic option ;)
Josiah Williams
Is there somewhere I can follow this? I liked it a good bit. Also please introduce a character with a flat chest.
Some of the characters will look a bit different once I have original art assets. And you can follow my twitter for updates (I swear I'll get better about it) as well as my itch.io
Hunter Morales
>Visual novel >looming threat of [ERASURE How often do visual novels do this meta stuff? I don't know many visual novels and this makes the third one I've seen like this.
Mason Cox
You will have to pay for artists and musicians. But... there is another way. I made all of my assets, music, writing, art, and programming. The good part about what I do is I can micromanage everything you want about the game, the only thing stopping you is your level of skill. The bad thing is projects take much longer because you have much more work to do. >not stealing chad's harem out from underhim Yeah, I'm betting 100% Hanazawa is the girl Hikaru was talking about. Also, I find the existence of the younger brother fairly unusual. He claims to be the devil or antithesis, but has little to no effect on what is happening in the story. However, the NEETmob mc actually has a little bend in the world built around him. Parents with personalities, the teacher ignoring his tardiness, Hikaru actually caring about him, being partnered up with the ChadMC. It would actually make more since if the MC was the antithesis himself. Stealing ChadMC's happiness out from under him, what could truly be more devillike? I really liked the dramatic tension. I loved walking into the clubroom and having their faces all fall. Having Hanazawa completely ignore you was funny too. Reminded me of my high school days.
Alexander Harris
Meta is basically it's own genre in VNs at this point. It's so pervasive due to the fact that it is one of the only mediums on literature told on a computer screen. The very nature of making choices to determine the course of a story is conducive to creatively bending the nature of said story told. One of these days, I'm going to do a writeup on it.
Kayden Long
Read a bit of it; it's pretty good so far. Other than the stolen assets, the only part that felt a bit amateur was when the [AWAKENED] text appeared on the screen. I think it would be good to tone that down.
