Love of my life

There's this girl at my uni (different department) who is absolutely gorgeous and does not have a bf. I fell for her, like for the first time in my life I think I feel love but I don't have the balls to talk to her. The love of my life will never know how much I like her. She will go on to marry and have a good life. I don't think I'll get over her anytime soon. Fuck man, why is life such a bitch. Why does everything have to so hard?

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Motherfucker, just do it. You'll literally never regret going and talking to her, even if you fail spectacularly. Send her a message or something. How'd you know her anyway?

she eats at the same dining hall as me so I see her a few times a week, everyday if I'm lucky. I really want to work up the courage to talk to her directly, what what the fuck do I say? Like how do people start a conversation with a girl?

Well, ok, it usually helps to at least have spoken to the person first, but then again there's a first time for everything. First things first, understand that you're not going to talk to her and immediately get a date. These things take time.

Personally, I'd say something like
>Hey, I've seen you around here, you do YYY, right? I'm user, I do ZZZ over in XYZ.

Generally you want to find something you two have in common (movies, music, vidya, anything) so that you can have something to actually talk over. Don't worry, it's uni, people are generally very friendly and ready to make new friends. Also, again, you probably shouldn't ask her out immediately and wait to talk to her a few more times. The good news about it is, if she actually enjoyed talking to you, she'll be more and more happy to see you every time you chat with her.

Also, I don't like to think ahead in courting, since the best thing you can do in these situations is not overthink things and live in the moment, but let's fast-forward a few weeks and assume that you haven't shown her your power level and she's actually enjoying talking to you. You have some friends, right? (I really hope you do, cause if you don't, that's something you should solve BEFORE going for girls). Invite her out for some outing with your friends that you think she might enjoy. Fuck it, if you're too scared of asking her in person, just do it over facebook/whatsapp/whatever you kids are using nowadays. Don't get too ahead of yourself, this is planning for something that needs incredible luck to even happen.

Holy fuck this is actually pretty sensible. I was thinking of saying something that seems cringey looking back : "hey, can I talk to you outside for 2 mins? You look absolutely gorgeous, and the first time in my life that my heart skipped a beat when I saw a girl. So what do you study here?" Fuck that would have been a sure way to be labeled a creepy autist.

Thanks user. Help me out a little more here. I ask her what she studies, she says xyz. Then how do I continue the conversation? I don't want to say "awesome" and walk away like a retard

>There's this girl at my uni (different department) who is absolutely gorgeous and does not have a bf. I fell for her, like for the first time in my life I think I feel love but I don't have the balls to talk to her. The love of my life will never know how much I like her. She will go on to marry and have a good life. I don't think I'll get over her anytime soon. Fuck man, why is life such a bitch. Why does everything have to so hard?

This same thing happening in my life user. I'm so fucking awkward when it comes to social situations. And this girl I like is my classmate and I had a very small conversations with her a couple of times. Everytime we see each other, we just smile and not say anything. She's just like me alone and awkward. But I don't think she likes me.

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my man, she is your classmate, it makes it much easier to talk to her. Give it a try. You can start talking about coursework and then talk about non-academic things. Good luck user

>give advice to others
>cannot follow said advice and apply it to my life
>mfw

>love of my love
>never talked to her

Yeah I think those kinds of strategies are nice because they work really well WHEN they work, but they don't work often.

So the basic conversation structure I follow is:
- I ask a question
- Listen to their response (let's call it X)
- Talk a tiny bit about your own response (e.g. "I like the new Marvel movie". "Oh really? I wasn't a massive fan of it, but I did love the scene where blah blah")
- If she was interested in X AND you are as well, repeat with more questions about X (using the previous example, "so what did you think of Infinity War?"). The thing here is, if she likes something and you don't, you can't really recreate the passion or the knowledge that someone who does love that subject has, so you're better off finding something that you two DO have in common
- If she was interested in X but you aren't, ask leading questions from a beginner standpoint ("I never watched any Marvel films, but I have been curious about them, there's just so many that I've been a bit intimidated to start. Are there any ones you'd recommend?")
- If she wasn't interested in X, don't spend much time on X and move on to find new topics ("Oh, you haven't seen them? That's fair enough, there's so many of them that I've stopped trying to really follow them at this point. So what kind of music do you like?")

Rinse and repeat. Note that this doesn't have to be with a girl, this "script" works just as well with guys, cause the basic idea is you're trying to become friends and THEN think about the next step.

I'm currently trying to think of what specifically you could say to this girl, but since this post is already a wall of text, I'll get back to you on that in a bit and just post this for now.

It just ends up getting a very awkward small talk about academics. I think we'll die alone user.

My man, thanks for this, sincerely appreciate it

Talk about what else you do, what other classes she takes, what she does outside of uni. You have an in, all you have to do is try, user.

dude I feel you. I feel the same, a little helpless, a little frustrated and desperate. But you got to take baby steps in the right direction user, what's the worst that happens? she isn't really interested. that's fine, you'll find it much easier to get over her knowing you tried and it didn't work out. If you never try you'll overthink everything and that ruins everything in life. Remember, a rejection is usually a boring affair : she says she's busy/not interested. that's it, no big deal. She is certainly not going to make a scene or tell everyone in the world and mock you for the rest of your life. that shit does not happen. The chances you don't take are the ones you'll regret most. Now I have to go re-read what I wrote and grow balls to actually apply my own advice to my life. I'm rooting for you user

Ok, I figured it out. Before you even introduce yourself, come up to her in the lunch hall with your tray of food and ask her if she minds if you sit across/close/next to her. She'll probably say "Yeah, sure", and that's basically an invitation to start a conversation with her. The rest is just talking to her.

Remember, it might not work out, but if it doesn't, you want to be able to say that you tried everything you reasonably could.

So here's the latest version of my plan:

- hey, what course do you study here?

- oh, nice, so it's part of xyz department

-ok. do you enjoy the course

-what do you like/don't like

- so, what else do you do here besides college work? did you visit some places around college, do you play sports or go to the gym

How does this sound robros?

Does she sit alone or with friends?

Sounds great, user. I could see your plan working out well. Don't forget to talk about yourself from time to time, don't make it seem like you're just probing her for answers.

always with friends. they aren't as gorgeous as her though, maybe 5 or 6 out of 10. My love is a solid 9. I'm hesitant to talk to them though, since pretty much the only reason why anyone would talk to them is because of "my love". I think it's better to talk to her directly and cut out the middle(wo)man

ah, so I'll just say "I study xyz over at school of abc" in the beginning. Anything else I need to add about myself?

I meant over the course of the conversation. Ask questions, and don't interrupt her or anything, but it helps to sort-of answer your own questions briefly after she's answered them, since it makes it a two-way conversation where you're both talking about yourself. Nothing specific you need to say though, just go with the flow of the conversation.

You should talk back to the other friends if they start talking to you, since it's easier to become friends with her if you're friendly with her friends.

If she's good looking and single, she likely has dozens of chads every day trying to get with her and a throng of orbiters hoping that she will one day pity fuck them when she can't find anyone else. You have no chance, OP. Look for someone else. Try an obese or retarded chick.

Don't bring your incel mentality here, this is an advice thread.

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she is not the type to party and is a little reserved, so she has one beta and one semi chad trying. They talk to her regularly, but she doesn't seem interested in them, so I'm good there. And no, she is not a whore. First time living away from parents and she has a little innocence left in her.

Just bringing some reality into this fantasy thread. OP is probably average looking at best. If this girl is as gorgeous as he says, she's way out of his league. He likely lacks the social capital, money, IQ and looks needed to get her. If he's reasonably attractive and confident, she might fuck him, but she won't commit to a relationship with him.

>she has a little innocence left in her.
Sure, whatever makes you feel better.

above average, has money, smart as fuck (I study computer science). I think she is studying for a meme degree with only betas in her class + being introverted helps keep the chads at a distance. You'll be surprised that there are very very few chads in real life. I'm decent socially as well, once I get past the initial awkwardness.

So I think I stand a chance, even though she is a league above me

She probably is in a league above you, but people don't actually think like that. You stand a chance, and what you have over everyone else is you're going to make an effort and talk to her, whereas most other people will just think "Damn, she's hot". Not saying it will work out, but it's entirely possible.

Also, fuck computer science. I did Maths with Comp Sci, and my computer science modules brought me down so much. Maybe it would have been easier if I'd done the entire course, rather than getting one module per semester, but still. Fucking theoretical maths is easier than coding.

Honestly, pretend to be confident. Be your confident self. Just go for it, user. Fake it and you'll make it.

haha, I feel the opposite about math and cs. Cs just clicks for me, but math, I find it much more challenging (the advanced calculus and linear algebra courses) and probably for similar reasons.

You can't be in love with her if you have never talked to her before.
You're either in love with a version of her that you've created in your head or you're just lusting after her body.
Go jerk off and think real hard about how relationships begin.

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I've heard her talk and the way she interacts with her friends, so not exactly a made up version in my head