OP, dude, it doesn't work like that.
Who deserves more respect, the people who were born just like everyone else and to whom everything came naturally almost without trying? Or people like you, me and us here, who have had to work for every single thing we have because we were born so different that nothing came easy?
Who deserves more praise, the women you've chased your entire life who have never done anything at all for you, and don't appreciate anything about you, and through their behavior have never done anything to deserve a single word or thought of praise from you? Or you, someone who has used countless hours of stress, effort, work, money, self improvement and introspection to try and prove yourself to these thankless people?
None of this is opinion. We're all born different, and the way we're born and raised determines who we become. Your failures aren't yours, that's just the hand you were dealt with in this game that is life. The success of those who got everyhing handed to them isn't theirs either, they just got lucky from the day they were born. That doesn't make us better or worse than anyone else. It just makes us different. So, too, are our challenges different, our goals, and our measures of success.
I'm an old fag with many reasons to feel shame or failure (lonely, never loved, not good with people), and many others through which I can feel extremely successful (late life academic bloomer, good career, complete financial independence). And if there's anything I've learned, it's to stop comparing yourself to others. Do what makes you happy. No-one of any significance is going to judge. And those people who do? They really don't matter jack shit.
We really do only get one life, try to accept and love yourself for who you are even if no-one else does, and do what makes you happy.
