You make a wish and I will either grant it or curse you

You make a wish and I will either grant it or curse you
>ask if you dare

Attached: smug.jpg (1280x800, 551K)

Other urls found in this thread:

mega.nz/#!i5QRBarA!3FGeGsRGxVJzWGD62UTOsQyU_eqBPIH4S8Aiob1zd_0
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Let me fornicate with your smug anime pic

Attached: YES.jpg (310x310, 42K)

Make it so I can stop time and take break whenever I want.

I want the best death a man could ever get

i want to love myself and others
i want a hug

i want a friend
desu

>Let me fornicate with your smug anime pic
You get cursed with a dick that has Autisim.

>Make it so I can stop time and take break whenever I want.
Your wish is granted but only if you are not an incel.

>i want to love myself and others
>i want a hug
Both your wishes are granted.
I hope you get your wish soon.

Attached: my waifu Megumin (51).jpg (724x1024, 119K)

I want to be able to control time.

Just make me a real girl goddammit.

Attached: ddd.png (600x600, 176K)

Well how does my autistic dick differ from a regular dick?

Attached: anithonk.jpg (347x550, 39K)

I wish for the confidence to stand up for myself and the people I care for.

I wish for more charisma so I can accomplish my goals

I wish to be isekai'd into a 2D world with cute anime girls and finally escape this god forsaken world that we live in

I want you to end all human suffering without taking any human life. If you cannot or will not do this, then your power is a lie.

Bring back Oreo Cakesters

Attached: 1508793725500.jpg (192x452, 31K)

My social incapability, I want you to remove that pls

Let me make the people i care about happy

Oki user I will grant this wish but you need to work for it
>charisma
hmmmm, I have some to spare I can lend
>dont we all
curse is you are in 2D world but its all guys

>I want you to end all human suffering without taking any human life. If you cannot or will not do this, then your power is a lie.
You have to do bad things to do the right thing sometimes.
Yes but you can only eat them.

Yes sure your wish is my command.

Attached: 63363578_p0.jpg (900x900, 248K)

Make my ex come back please.

>I think I will curse you with being immortal and being known around the globe.
YOU STUPID WENCH I DON'T WANT TO BECOME A CELEBRITY

;_;
i g-guess it can't be helped then

>

sdfvs

Alright, make my dick really big please.
Like 12" x 7" when it's hard, and maybe 8" x 6" soft.

>curse is you are in 2D world but its all guys
feelsbadman. can it at least be a world where I get to go on cool adventures

I want a cute asian gf pls

Attached: d7b1f78bf2cfe39d2873b0a938157675.jpg (338x600, 35K)

I want a harem of cute 10/10 girls please

Attached: notpervert.jpg (1159x948, 168K)

i want a qt girlfriend that actually loves me

Let death be the way it is believed to be in the buddhist religion. Reincarnation until you find true inner peace with your own existence.

I wish for a jerry can which will turn any liquid you pour inside into fuel. Pour inside water and one drop of gasoline, shake it and it will be full of gasoline, do the same with water and diesel, you will get diesel etc. The fuel quality will depend on how many times you shake it. 100 for maximum quality. The maximum quality is limited by the fuel you use to start the reaction. You can't turn shitty 95 gas into premium. It will become a regular jerry can once punctured or torn open.

Don't you fucking hate it when you forget the picture?

Attached: 10907693_1.jpg (792x810, 51K)

You will make a friend you do not need a wish granted.
Just try talk to some people online.

>Alright, make my dick really big please.
You want a big dick but I curse you with a smaller pee pee.
Lose 2 inches.

>I want a cute asian gf pls
You will get your wish granted by Megu :)
She will be a nice girl
>I want a harem of cute 10/10 girls please
You get a curse for wanting more than one girl...

>i want a qt girlfriend that actually loves me
You deserve a wish being granted for all you want is love.

Megu grants your wish but she aughs and says you really wasted a wish.
>what is that autistic wish

this is like weird to wish for.

Attached: my waifu Megumin (10).png (800x1054, 470K)

Hey user I get the idea of saving money and basically free gas but why the hell do you have so many stipulations on the transformation of the liquid? If the genie wanted to fuck with you and turn your regular fuel into some other type you could just pour it into a different can and sell it or something. It doesn't cost you much and you'd make money selling jet fuel or something.

but I already got one 5/10 gf and it just feels like it's not enough for me

Attached: boude_pikachu.jpg (407x286, 13K)

>
>>Alright, make my dick really big please.
>You want a big dick but I curse you with a smaller pee pee.
>Lose 2 inches.
I think that would leave user with a vag holy shit dun do it.

Also what is my curse ?

i wish to be a true chad

It was by far the most autistic shit I read today.
>but I already got one 5/10 gf and it just feels like it's not enough for me
You need to let her go then, do you not feel anything for her?
Life is not a harem anime.

>I think that would leave user with a vag holy shit dun do it.
That is what you get when you ask pure Megu for a impure wish of vanity.

>Also what is my curse ?
Your curse is no girl will love you again for wanting more than one girl.
>i wish to be a true chad
I will grant your wish but you now have sexual anhedonia so cannot orgasm.
>dont worry user I have had it all my life

No I deeply love her I'm just a pathetic fag that is always starving for more and that dont deserve anything good

Will the Deep South Christian school to go to ever find out Im gay?

>Cursed, you go back in time but end up raping your own mum
>>hehehhe
Savage lol

not that guy, I want to be transported 5 years into the future.

>Will the Deep South Christian school to go to ever find out Im gay?
Megu says you should take the 2D pill and not be a fag.
Refuses to grant or curse fags
>, I want to be transported 5 years into the future.
wish=granted
curse is that you do not remember making the wish.

Attached: my waifu Megumin (9).jpg (811x1054, 269K)

>will become a regular jerry can once puncture or torn
Gives me the ability to destroy it in case the government wants to take it away.
>100 shakes for good quality fuel
The liquid will slowly wash away the jerry can walls from the inside. Just like a river washes away stones and polishes them. At some point the walls will be to thin and tear, preventing anyone who might get their hands on it to create unlimited amounts of gasoline. Also this regulates the speed at which fuel can be created.
>need to ad a drop of fuel into the liquid to turn it into said fuel
Let's me choose what kind of fuel I want to create. I can still create jet fuel. I just need a drop of it.
Most importantly the restrictions and rules make the wish more interesting. Not only for the sake of this thread but even if this would be real. You don't want to make your life to easy. Getting everything by the snap of your fingers would be to boring. Kind of like beating a game with cheat codes. I might be fun for a while but it gets boring really quick. Where's the sense of accomplishment, the adventure? Think about it like this. Would you read book about a invincible mage who can just kill entire armies with his thoughts or would you rather like to read a book about a mage who is restricted and has to obey certain rules of the magic universe, has to gather rare ingreedients for potions, can't harm people he doesn't see and stuff like that.

I wanna be a a diaper girl, pls

But why fuel?
why not something better?

When I was younger I imagined how cool having a bag of weed that just kept dropping weed out of it.

>I wanna be a a diaper girl, pls
Megu said
>no taht is yucky

Attached: my waifu Megumin (702).jpg (700x700, 313K)

Because I'm an /o/utist that's why. Driving and working on my car is the only thing which makes me happy and that's all I want to do. I don't even care about love anymore. Also fuel is an important and valuable resource.

I want an A6M3 Model 32 to fly around some pacific islands.

Attached: Hamp.jpg (421x600, 18K)

I want to join a satanic cult and participate in cult organized orgies? Can you grant wish

Attached: devil.jpg (600x330, 35K)

Hey genie, I would like a Jerry can but when you put water in (and a single flake of gold)it it pores out molten gold made from water. The more I shake it the higher karat the gold is. The maximum karat will however be determined by the original flake in the initial reaction. You can't turn a shitty 10 karat into a 24 karat. It will also become a regular Jerry can if anyone else uses it.

I wish I wouldn't be a depressed loser NEET anymore.

Attached: 1555102448970.jpg (1280x720, 164K)

Yeah man you an autist
>I want an A6M3 Model 32 to fly around some pacific islands.
Megu said
>you may
but I would like you to make a cargo cult in her honor.

>I want to join a satanic cult and participate in cult organized orgies? Can you grant wish
I do not grant the wish Megu does and I asked and she said
something like
>no that is degenerate
Ok megu said
>oh another autist, ok
So wish is granted
>I wish I wouldn't be a depressed loser NEET anymore.
I asked megu and she said
>he will be forever
so I guess this means curse.
Kinda mean of her but she knows best

Attached: my waifu Megumin (665).jpg (305x326, 39K)

>he will be forever
I want out of this Bad End. How do I restart and pick the Chad Route.

Attached: 1555540733693.png (1366x768, 1.02M)

I wish for infinite wishes for me to make at any time I want.

I want a turkey sandwich, please get me one.

I wish i could empathise better with people i often don'r realise if a person has problems or is feeling bad and if i do , i do it way to late and feel bad afterwards.

>make a cargo cult
A what cult?

Make me commander of some random jungle rebellion so I can use some insane tactics I thought of.

Attached: 1545691672148.jpg (769x769, 68K)

I wish for everyone here to become cute girls(male) and join my discord server using the following link
cBthacM

Attached: tumblr_oa8tsmvS6m1tslq0po1_500.jpg (500x523, 68K)

>Get fucked user

Originally orinallingy

Attached: 1555542421666_Can.png (2518x1024, 341K)

I want to bear children

Attached: aqua munching.gif (540x652, 1.7M)

Fags just have to ruin everything. Don't you retards.

I want Megumin to show me her feet!

sorry man it is our life.
doomed.
>I wish for infinite wishes for me to make at any time I want.
megu said
>no that is against the rules
See she is smart and has rules she does not disclose.
>I want a turkey sandwich, please get me one.
I asked
>get a GF to make you one
BTFO by Megu.
>I wish i could empathise better with people i often don'r realise if a person has problems or is feeling bad and if i do , i do it way to late and feel bad afterwards.
>I wish i could empathise better with people i often don'r realise if a person has problems or is feeling bad and if i do , i do it way to late and feel bad afterwards.
Megu said
>yes and you are not a sociopath
at least you feel bad I guess, I struggle with empathy myself user, you will get there.
>A what cult?
what is google
Megu said
>yeah that is fine
I guess she liked that you have a fun idea
Megu said
>he is a gay fag
Megu is based on the poofta cunts
autistism vc tism
>I want to bear children
Megu said you will but cursed you
>your children will be bears
tough luck

Attached: s5suvqt.jpg (728x728, 25K)

I want 10 wishes

I want a gentle femdom gf

I just want my dad to survive tomorrow's surgery please

I wish I could take a good photo of myself so i can have the confidence to make a dating profile and get one step closer to not being a khhv.

My wish is to write short stories.

The price of gold will decline with every bit you sell meanwhile you can keep selling all kinds of fuel and the price wouldn't drop. Some fuels are probably more expensive than gold anyway.
>pores out liquid gold
>is made of gold
Have fun with your melted jerry can.

I wish for gunjy and all other homosexual attention whores to die from aids.

original postiolee, grant me death-e-oh li

I wish for a snuggie so I can be comfy while I shitpost

Attached: willsnuggie_thumb_500x666.jpg (565x754, 95K)

I wish that the girl I have coming over to mine this Friday has sex with me pls

Your Dads going to die faggot and you'll never get to see him again

Gold is 5 times rarer, is used almost as much as fuel. And this can could build and destroy entire modern and probably future empires if used effectively.

The inflation problem also happens to your fuel. Not only that but with a shit tone of gold on demand it would be very easy to make renewable energy sources more widely available. Basically undermining your entire cans worth.

And it being a rarer, if it was more widely available the entire human race would advance quicker.

>face it user your can is gay

I just want to live in peace somewhere nice, and for my friends to be safe

Attached: Face 1.jpg (564x846, 70K)

>I want 10 wishes
I asked and Megu said
>no thats gay
No cheating user
>I just want my dad to survive tomorrow's surgery please
I asked and Megu said
>maybe
I hope he does survive user no, you should try find a nice girl
She knows only whores use dating apps user.
Cherish your virginity
>My wish is to write short stories.
I asked
>you can do that, we all can do that
:) I am writing a rhyme atm

this autisim I like how its going jerrycan fags
>I wish for gunjy and all other homosexual attention whores to die from aids.
checked
I asked Megu and she said
>that is not very nice, you shoudl get aids
Looks like you got a curse
>, grant me death
I asked
>just kill yourself why ask me
Why ask Megu?
>I wish for a snuggie so I can be comfy while I shitpost
I asked
>you should try find the right girl
I guess Megu is saying you just need to find a girl, not wish worthy
>I wish that the girl I have coming over to mine this Friday has sex with me pls
I asked megu and she didnt respond to me
>I just want to live in peace somewhere nice, and for my friends to be safe
I asked megu and she replied
Paraphrased as I kinda lost what she said
>that is very nice user, your wish is my command

megu only did one curse this time, I really do ask her as well, she said I am nice right then.

Attached: my waifu Megumin (23).png (648x1023, 559K)

oh god oh sweet lord jesus oh gee oh gosh oh no...

Attached: 1537649975349.jpg (736x630, 102K)

make me a sexy girl in my perception of sexy

>oh god oh sweet lord jesus oh gee oh gosh oh no...
nice digimon
>make me a sexy girl in my perception of sexy
I asked and
>only if you are nice
was the answer from megu

Attached: 55088155_p0.jpg (1681x1198, 444K)

Is this the australian suicidal megumin person?

Attached: 1545897956074.jpg (64x243, 11K)

I wish for the girl I met off here to have a quick resolution to the stressful stuff going on in her life rn so we can talk more. Pls Megu

Attached: IMG_0053.jpg (640x456, 42K)

guess I am in luck because I am a nice person :)

I wish I didn't grow hair as fast

Save western civilization

i wish i could live someone elses life. just anyone but not me

i wish for femanons to love us

I ask megu for her most quality picture of herself, please i'm a fan :(

Yeah keep ignoring the fact that fuel isn't only what you put in your car. Anything, oil, wood, hydrogen, uranium, as long as it fuels something, the jerry can can produce it.

>Is this the australian suicidal megumin person?
Yeah :)
>I wish for the girl I met off here to have a quick resolution to the stressful stuff going on in her life rn so we can talk more
Megu says
>life is uncertain sometimes and full of stress
Sorry user but no wish :(
>I wish I didn't grow hair as fast
Megu says
>you are just silly
I guess you didnt make a proper wish.
>Save western civilization
You wont like this one
megu says
>watch it burn
She likes explosions afterall user
>i wish i could live someone elses life. just anyone but not me
Megu says
>become the person you want to be
I guess that is wish granted if you make the effort?
>i wish for femanons to love us
Megu said
>not everyone deserves love
SOme nasty people on r9k so we wouldnt want them being loved maybe because they could hurt femanons.
Wish not granted
>I ask megu for her most quality picture of herself, please i'm a fan :(
Megu says
>beauty is in the eye of the beholder
mega.nz/#!i5QRBarA!3FGeGsRGxVJzWGD62UTOsQyU_eqBPIH4S8Aiob1zd_0
I do not get why he wants fuel? why not wish for eternal fuel or some shit.
he wanted a jerrycan with autistic rules and limitations.????

Attached: 55890556_p0.jpg (1661x1158, 997K)

Nice to see you're doing well, if you could find time to work on your actual problems instead of sitting on r9k that'd be nice, but I guess all things take time. Unban me from your Discord, I need hate fuel.

Attached: 1527537402620.jpg (73x65, 5K)