Parents' physical abuse

-Were you beaten as a child? If yes tell us your story if you can? If not, then tell us how it has shaped your life and personality?
-If you weren't beaten, tell us if you would consider yourself a healthy person

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I grew up as an only child in a fatherless family. My mom loved and continues to love me a lot. The excesive freedom and love that was offered to me, without the discipline and advice from a man shaped me into an entitled egocentric always unhappy always unsatisfied jerk without any self confidence. I feel hate and anger towards any form of authority that atempts to control me in any way. I can't get myself to achieve anything great yet I believe I am the shit. I don't have a romantic relationship and I don't see myself being able to hold a relationship. My whole life is torment and I know it's because of my inferiority. I wish a girl would come, hug me and tell my it's all going to be alright, that I can be fix and that she can help me. I know that's not realistic or a healthy scenario and I know it's also most likely a symptom of my lack of emotional development. A weird combination of mommy issues and daddy issues.
I have illusions of grandeur and I "know that if I were give the chance to prove myself I could be great", even though that's most likely not true.
In short, I am the adult, skinny version of Cartman. A literal 23 years old manchild.
I began to identify more and more with OP's pic related.
TL;DR: I wish my mom would have beaten me more. Best case scenario it would have disciplined me for life, worst case I would have ended up hating her and not feel guilty about wanting to kill myself.

yea one day when I was like 6 year old I think dad came drunk from work and grab my head and smash it at the corner of the bed.
still got scar at the back of the head from that.
22 I feel mannered and discipline from that and when I see a degenerate sperging our whoring out near me I warn them if they don't act well in society I'll literally beat the shit out of them and send them to the hospital without having balls to call the police because they pussy out.
I'd say yes it changed my life and I know how to act as at 20+ years old, not like a fucking child bitching about life.

Great Grandma beat the shit out of me with a yardstick for anything when I was a toddler. Ended up rebelling and attacking her one day but got put the fuck down by extended family, ended up with a crushed spirit and not a shred of masculinity.

Got sent back to my (single) mom when she got out of jail. She never hit me but locking me in the closet, verbally abusing me anytime she saw me (until I'd hide in the bathroom), screaming (bloodcurtling, top of her lungs screaming) at me for hours for every minute mistake until her voice started to give out, neglecting every single emotional and physical need of mine, a revolving door of equally abusive deadbeat 'dads', constant drug abuse, and outright lying about me being an awful and manipulative kid to every person (teachers, friends, family, doctor, children's services, CHILD THERAPIST) who could've helped me did a lot of damage. She also broke my wrist once, but that ain't shit.

Nobody ever gave me shit in life. It took me until high school, when I escaped that shit and then got abused by my actual dad when he was all I had left.

My experiences with these, and all the other abusers throughout my entire life has made me realize that nobody is worth saving. Humans are all beyond redemption, and should all have their genitals hacksawed off and forced down their throats. Even if you're a disabled child being beaten to a pulp every fucking night, nobody will help you. Nobody WANTS to help anyone else, because nobody really gives a shit about anyone else, even their own fucking blood family.

Fuck the human race, and fuck God. This entire planet needs to drift away from the sun so that every human maggot on this rotting carcass can fucking die already.

My father worked all the time and my mother would take her frustration out on me

I stopped going home after school since once she was drunk and watching TV in the evening she wouldnt get up until she went to bed

I also grew up in an ultra low income area and had many enemies through school and kids who lived in my neighbourhood so I was overdosing on adrenaline constantly

I feel like Im a bad person now due to all of this

>be 8
>mom dies
>depressed dad starts hitting me when I misbehave - she used to do all the disciplining
>usually it's not too harsh, but if I really fucked up then he'd get the belt

>be 15
>dad is badly injured, loses both hands in a car accident
>doesn't beat me, but still occasionally threatened me when I fucked up, I never talked back although we both knew he couldn't do anything to me
>about 6 weeks into his recovery he shamefully asked me to help masturbate, and as of that point whenever he got grumpy or annoying I'll wish him goodluck showering on his own tonight, as though to imply I won't be jerking him off anymore
>at some point he said it's a cruel threat, and he'd rather I beat him than use it
>only ever slapped him twice, but it was extremely satisfying.

Father would beat me with a 1 inch thick wooden rod whenever I got upset or angry. This was from when I was 7 - 14. Mind you, I have autism so I got loud quite a lot and I got very upset amd very angry if I realized I was about to get fucked over by my lying siblings. So, I got beaten. A lot. I took up martial arts and eventually broke his hand, he stopped beating me after that. I wonder if the reason he is nice to me now is because of that.

Still hate my mother way more though. Fucking mentally ill whore.

Oh how the tables have fucking turned. Should've beaten his stupid ass to a fucking pulp and left him in a ditch in the desert, dropped in a Nokia phone and told him to call for help on his own.

not thread related but I lived your life

>16
>best friend cooks his girlfriend an anniversary meal
>he drops hot oil on both his hands and his groin like a spaz
>his girlfriend breaks up with him via text while he is in the hospital
>a week later he is sleeping over at my place
>we just watch tv because he can't use a controller or a keyboard
>tells me it has been the worst week of life
>he doesn't care about his ex anymore he just wants to cum and cant fap
>he shows me the burn marks on his groin and asks me to jerk him off
>says he is sorry he cant return the favor
>tried jerking him off
>was awkward as fuck
>managed to get him to cum
>he started crying afterwards
>said I was his best friend and he is sorry about this and that he will always remember this moment
>three weeks later
>got a new girlfriend with new friends
>stopped talking to me

i told this story for the first time yesterday to a friend who I know lurks here
this is probably a prank but if not we are all truly the same robot

>19
>go to my first burning man with best friend
>scaffolding tower falls down as we walk by
>instinctively push him away from it
>he falls down and a beam crushes both his wrists
>instantly realize I saved him from certain death
>screamed in pain while thanking me
>kept telling everyone at the hospital what a ninja I am and how I saved him
>four days after he was released from the hospital
>tells me not being able to masturbate made the last 4 days unbearable
>said he feels bad about asking this especially after I saved his life but basically asked me to jerk him off
>he joked about how I could see it as experimenting in college
>he did seem more frustrated than I had ever seen him before and for some dumb reason I felt a little guilty for pushing him
>tried jerking him off
>he got hard instantly, but wouldn't cum
>after about 5 minutes he suggested we take a break
>said between jerking him off and saving his life he at least owes me a blowjob and starts positioning his face in my crotch
>I tell him that won't be necessary
>he insists, saying turning him down after he mustered up the courage to do it isn't cool
>I cave in to the pressure
>he sees my small dick and tries to be kind and hide a laugh
>he just instantly deepthroats it
>cum in like 20 seconds
>he licks it off and swallows
>says that one was too quick and I deserve another one
>kept sucking until I came again
>then asked me to jerk him off
>asked that we will never speak of it again
>the next day he already asked me to jerk him off again - no blowjob this time
never got a blowjob since.

I was never abused myself. I always had a good relationship with my parents, who spoiled me rotten and went out of their way to ensure I never faced any adversity. user is scared to do a presentation for class? Mommy will call the principal and make sure user doesn't have to be subjected to such discomfort.

But my protective and loving mother was a completely different person to the mentally challenged girl she had in foster care. She'd get absolutely furious at her for things she'd let me and my sister do. One time the girl ate some candy from our candy drawer (which me and my sister were allowed to eat from to our hearts' content), and my mom punished her by forcing her to eat until she vomited. My mom's favorite punishment was to throw the girl into our bathtub and fill it with freezing water. I remember being shocked by this behavior on the inside, but outwardly I had to take my mom's side, and so I would stand by the bathtub and taunt the girl who had turned blue and was shaking from the cold.

She peed the bed one time, and my mom made her sit in a closet all day in a diaper. Naturally, the girl wet her diaper eventually, and, naturally, my mom used that as an excuse to throw her in the cold bathtub. I remember mom took the soiled diaper and swung it so hard in the girl's face that piss-soaked bits of cotton flew everywhere and were spattered across the bathroom walls.
The girl, now 23, still lives with my mom. She's completely ruined. The abuse continues, but nowadays it's limited to verbal abuse and restricting, or rather, completely removing, the girl's freedoms. My mom is literally always furious at the girl and can't even be civil with her in front of guests.

I'm curious about the psychology at play here. How the fuck can such a loving and caring person be such a monster, and what the fuck is wrong with me and my sister who even as adults ignore the issue to this day?

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the first paragraph is literally me. my parents spoiled me so much, thats probably why im such a lazy piece of shit

>I took up martial arts and eventually broke his hand

kek. i'm sure that happened.

Yes I did suffer parental abuse.
Yes it has damaged me very deeply. I have many trust related issues with intimacy which impairs my sex life quite a bit.
It has made me learn that I am extremelly resilient because despite it all and how it has caused me issues and still do, I developed in a pretty sane and healthy person. I have a great ammount of friends who love me, I don't struggle socially, but up until very recently, the one place where it really ruined my life was wgen trying to develop romantic feelings for girls, which is why I ended up here despite generally veing a normie. I am 30 and I just met the very first person with who things actually work. She has issues similar to mine and we have a lot of mutual respect for that so I feel like we realky help eachother, but I struggle to getvhard during sex and even when I am, I never cum. It sucks but I deal with it. I feel like we do a lot of good to eachother and as we take thibgs slowly without putting pressure on eachother, I hope we'll both learn to let go on the pain.

It wasn't so much love and care towards you as it was massive overprotectiveness. Then all the things you did that pissed her off, she took it out on the girl. And you're a self-pitying shitter for having so many opportunities to do something about it, not doing anything, and then going "well I guess I'm a bad person", as if that'd solve anything. Not that the girl is likely to be salvageable at this point.

Does it count if he denies it, even after just doing it?

>as though to imply I won't be jerking him off anymore
so you jacked him off a couple times because he couldn't do it himself? goddamn, you're a nice person

WELL HELP THE POOR GIRL FOR FUCK'S SAKE, YOU'RE A MAN NOW, TIME TO SAVE SOMEONE'S LIFE

and don't feel guilty for fucking over your mom, she's a cunt who took out all the anger towards you and your sister on someone innocent. had the disabled girl not been there, you and your sister would have received that abuse

I've been contemplating it a lot, but I still love my mom. She's pretty much my only source of social interaction. I visit her almost daily.

What's crazy is my mom's ability to normalize the behavior. Me and my sister are in denial about the abuse, my dad was in denial about the abuse, and now that my sister has been with her husband for almost a decade, he too has witnessed the abuse first hand, and like everyone else, he acts as if it doesn't happen and that my mom isn't a monster.
My mom is the matriarch that keeps the family together. She loves us and we love her - even if a lot of cognitive dissonance is required to pretend the abuse doesn't happen.

I kinda wish my sister would take it upon herself to do something. She turned out normal and has kids of her own. I'm a robot on disability who wouldn't even know to go about reporting it or how to deal with my mom afterward. Prison sentences are notoriously low in my country (the average sentence for sexually abusing a child is 21 months), so my mom would be back within weeks.

you made me rewatch the watchmaker chapter of the watchmen animated series and I cant handle these feels again OP

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>jacked him off a couple times
I jerked him off a couple hundred times by the time I was 22

>Prison sentences are notoriously low in my country (the average sentence for sexually abusing a child is 21 months), so my mom would be back within weeks
yeah but it's not about punishing your mother, what's way more important is the girl being taken away from her.
maybe you should talk to your mom about it, get your sister to back up your claims that your mom is abusing the girl? you think that might go somewhere?

where's that pic from? looks fuckin beatufiul

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It's from watchmen you uncultured swine

thx m9

apparently this comment is not original enough so there you go bitch

why? you weren't forced, you said yourself he couldn't make you do shit

>why?
He's my dad.
He raised me.
He worked every day so I'll have food and clothes and tutors.
He was basically suffering from chronic blueballs - constant physical pain - he didn't even have wet dreams because they require at least a bit of jerking yourself off in your sleep.
Would have to be a heartless ungrateful asshole not to jerk him off.