Ideal bf thread

Ideal BF:
>long hair
>smooth skin
>shaved
>cute voice
>dresses nice
>is a girl

>That image
Describes me too well

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what if i were all of these things but not a girl

This thread is a trainwreck already

Those are the minimum requirements. Missing one point is an automatic F.

PauLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINA
She's like an animated brooke.

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Not looking to beg for an e-gf, but is it weird that the vast majority of these apply to me even though I always get INTP? Or is the pic just misidentified?

At this point I'm not sure if these girls wants me at all.

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Ideal
>knows lots of theology
>thinks god has abondoned him
>prays for forgiveness all the time
>hates himself for his blasphemous thoughts

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Once again I essentially tick all the boxes. Maybe this one will reply

>uni degree
>brown eyes
oof

sorry for not being able to reply to you in that other thread, but it looks like I couldn't compete anyways

Well it probably has something to do with you not being the stereotype of a meme personality test.

I kinda fit but I'm not a Prot. Whatever

>nice voice
>dry humor
>really nice and caring
>likes politics
>allows others to have their own opinion
>uni student
>not a STEM major

Whats wrong with STEM?

Beehive for incels. Not all of them but an r9k stem student, oh boy.

>is a prot
weeew lad youve been jew'd

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STEM majors seem to be mean, but if they aren't mean then it's not awful or a deal breaker.

>wanting dry humor
>not liking meanness
wat?

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you can have dry humor and not be a mean person.

>stem majors
>ever even remotely funny or empathetic

even their banter is shit. youre married to the numbers bro, leave the pussy to the rest of us

That's not me, user. Just a copycat.
Also, sorry I didn't reply either (at first I assumed you lived in burgerland after all). But considering your location I'm sorry to say it doesn't matter much either way. Maybe we'll just meet in another life.

Whats your denomination then, user?

?

no wait, nevermind I'm being really pathetic right now, just ignore me

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Do you mean surface level mean like teasing you about shit or genuinely mean spirited like posting your nudes to get back at you? Because I'd wager most stem majors are only mean on the surface. Not to say that they're particularly nice either.

I'll have you know my mom says I'm very funny.

What the hell counts as mean in your eyes?

Not my Ideal but it's relevant so I'm posting it.

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>uni student
depressing

I'm Catholic, so the self-loathing is normal to some extent, but life experiences and how I was raised have shaped a lot of it as well.

pic related familam

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i hope youre lutheran as well femanon.

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my ex bf is my ideal bf

wait did I even ever tell you where I was?
or is that your way of saying you're not interested and I'm being too autistic to read between the lines

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You aren't. I just did some thinking and realized I need to grow up from the desperate edating phase.

>isn't actually anyone's bf
Too accurate.

>not my ideal
Figured

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>tfw met my ideal man on this board

I guess this Mongolian basket weaving board was worth wading through after all.

oh, I see
well thanks for making me realize I still had some hope left anyways, hope it works out for you senpai

Lets be honest, we're nobody's ideal.

Hey, I was just kind of memeing the selfloathing religious kid. If you wanna talk Im here. People have very difficult lives and I am sorry to hear how this has affected you negatively. I wish you strength to move past that. God does love you beyond measure, user.

genuinely mean spirited of course
that's the ideal, it's okay if not

I also forgot that my ideal bf would be a virgin, but it's also okay if not

>Patient
>Optimist
>Not religious
>Knows Sign Language
>Not taller than 5'9.
>Likes the same weeb mix of anime/manga/games
>Has other hobbies to keep him busy or to do together

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Women will lie about what is "perfect" to them. It's whomever is their main interest at that moment. Once they move pass you they will think less of you and anyone who looks like you.

Stop fukcing postic you retard deaf ugly bitch go and get orbiters somewhere else

Do you have experience with that or is this just the crying of an incel?

>ENTP
>autistic loyalty since I view contracts like the ferengi do
>fucking mess and cool with any help I get
>hetrochromia with green outside and brown insides
>follow what Spinozaists believe
Only problem is I am literally a boomer who didn't go to college and works a low effort blue collar unionized job for decent wages.

Ah it's okay I just get depressed when people are in college because it takes a lot of time away and I feel like most of it is a lie and leads to careers that are unfulfilling.

No, not until I find someone who knows sign language. You are powerless here.

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Who wants an ugly stupid disabled roastie? Go on soc or some shit you huge retard

I am sure you guys are the ideal of someone

There are many people in developed nations and even in more developed developing nations that probably would love you!

Ideal
>/tg/
>/mu/
>likes physical contact
>Will hold my hand
>funny
>not a pushover
>will let me spoil them
>protective
>loyal

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No. You can't change that, so cry more. I'll post it in the next thread too.

It's another ideal thread with nothing close to who or what you are
youtube.com/watch?v=M2LdF1RlSL0

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I'm Intp and here are some things on here that I am not

>I wish I could live in a cabin in the wilderness but without having to practice survival skills

Practicing them is the fun part though, and I still want a moderate amount of technology. I just want to be able to live without it if I need to.

>Acts pure but has a 10gb hentai stash

Fuck sex toys, and I don't download porn or act pure, but I do fap to furry porn (hentai sucks)

>Drops a hobby two days after getting into it

If I actually enjoy something I'm committed to do it until I die.

>absurdism is stupid

I don't think so.

>Can communicate with a computer in five different languages but can't talk to a girl

That one is pretty funny and maybe it is right, but it has just happened that there aren't many girls in my life to talk to in the first place

There are more things on here that aren't quite right but I don't care enough to write them all out.

anonette please teach me sign language NOW

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>/tg/
>/mu/

So if I play tabletop games and make electronic music and listen to music all the time am I cool?

>/tg/
>/mu/
>likes physical contact
>Will hold my hand
>will let me spoil them
I'll be your bf (male)

ik sign language but the sign language its not even universal, there are different types of it
thats basic knowledge .-.

Sadly both user. I've lived a normie life and also an robo one

>Being coached by someone who can only interact through it
A lot of middle-aged people are able to pick it up for children so your younger, sharper mind should be fine.
Learn ASL, don't go for any meme stuff.
Obviously ASL, BSL is clown tier.

>completely disregarding the intellectually gifted because of a few bad apples

i am going to and you will wait patiently deafnon

>thinking that all STEM majors are intellectually gifted
it's not like they are going for the most over saturated fields of this time or anything. I wouldn't not date someone because they are a STEM major anyways. It's just a preference.

Looking forward to that (you).

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>tfw patient atheist 5'9 optimist who knows BSL

Is this a fag thread or a fembot thread?

/r9gay/ is the other way. This is females and possibliy larping trannies.

what's your discord? I want to hold hands with someone :'(

>several threads dedicated to gays and women with virtually no one calling them out
Welcome to 4/r9k/ in 2019!

>world is a shit hole and no one cares
Welcome to planet earth

>Welcome to clown world
FTFY

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>Knows Sign Language
Is this necessary? I could try learning it, and I meet everthing else?

Also why specifically a bf that isnt taller then 5'9 lol?

I know He does, I just get down and cry that everyone hates me sometimes. Once I missed confession and cried in the car that even God hates me and wouldn't accept my confession anyways. At least I'm not violent, I guess, but few people would probably accept someone like me that bottles up all his feelings and has to let them out in private alone, if anyone would.

a guy who likes to cuddle alot, cute laugh and a nice voice who will play vidya with me all day when hes free from work until we fall asleep in eachothers arms. just a kind hearted guy who would never cheat on me and love me forever who i could marry as soon as possible. i dont really mind how he looks aslong as he showers often and isnt fat

have contact user?

Ever ask God what's up with your religion enabling old creepy men raping kids for kicks?

>Is this necessary?
It's essential.
I'm 4'11 so when it gets to a foot larger difference it feels gross. Their features feel more like an ogres when compared to my midget-tier self.

God has already accepted you. Im lutheran so we have a little different take on this and maybe it doesnt mean anything to you, but we believe in sola gratia and sola fide. We are redeemed through our faith Christ by gods grace alone. There isnt anything you can do to earn gods love or forgiveness. On the contrary, if you earned it it would cease to be a gift.
And no one is perfect, user. People are difficult and feelings even more so. People handle their emotions differently. Of course I hope that you will find healthy ways to work through them instead of bottling them up, as you put it, but thats not a reason for other people to hate you, or not accept you. We all are deeply flawed. The point is to carry each others crosses and to try and bear your burden. Its okay to ask for help though.
Ask and you will receive, all that Jazz.

>all of this and exactly 5'9 but no sign language
>Was gonna learn sing language long ago but my mom said it would be better to study something else.
Oh well, i doubt we're even remotely close.

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>Lets me fix him
This honestly made me laugh out loud. He's not fuckin ideal if you need to "fix" him dum dum

>Lets me fix him
How the fuck is he an ideal bf if you have to "fix" him? What is this autism?

hi am i an ideal bf
>5 foot 10
>curly dark brown hair
>glasses
>kinda lanky but ive been working out, dont really enjoy it though but im showing results
>i'm big into comedy
>writing a book series with my friend
>i draw and paint
>making a youtube series with my other friend (comedy)
>depression, anxiety, you know the drill
>a little sensitive
i can go on if you want

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Yeah, he says you should ignore leftists and other government officials doing it more often and focus on a singular religious structure doing it instead. Don't question the government at all.
On a more serious note, I'm somewhat of a sedevacantist anyways. The church, like any seat of power, tends to attract some bad people to it, as much as the good. Just as one bad president or PM doesn't invalidate the entire government, one bad pope or priest shouldn't invalidate an entire religion.
I know you don't need to earn God's love and all that, I just don't think clearly when I'm upset. It's more a personal thing than a religious one, the religious self loathing is hating your own sin and all that other stuff that's unrelated to my human mess.
I didn't really come to debate religion or politics, so I'd rather not start another of these shitstorms that derails threads.

okay so honestly the fixing him thing seems weird, but SO many guys want to get a gf that they can fix/cure of depression/mental illnesses so like it's not that weird

you should go on! you seem good

The absolute state of betas posting in this thread thinking there are actual "fembots" in here.

THEY ARE ALL LARPING AS WOMEN YOU IDIOTS.

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>Tall
>Wears labcoats
>Wacky hair
>Lives in Japan
>University student
>Possibly schizophrenic, but with a heart of gold
>Drinks Dr. Pepper
>Is a time traveler

Why is it so hard to find guys like this, girls?

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Where did you get this picture of me originally? Seriously, it's me to a T

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Way too relatable, especially the "isn't actually anyone's bf" part.
What even is the point of us existing if we're too lazy and unmotivated to actually want to do anything useful?
I just wish I could sleep and have vivid dreams for all of eternity.

that was a minimum requirement, not part of the ideal bf. you fucking retards cant read