Alright, I'm fucking done.
I'm 32 years old and have never kissed a woman. I'm not even a total sperg. Was a normalfag for my entire life. Had a great circle of friends, met many women but never managed to score.
The problem? I don't fucking know. I choke and freeze when talking with them. I'm boring, never had a passion or hobbies and spent all my life behind a computer. Not a good career either, still wageslave on a deadend job. Don't come and say that its because of that that I'm a failure, because my friends who were in the same situation (some even in worse ones) are marrying and having kids now.
Anyway, I summon all the normalfags and robots that ended up making it here.
Tell me how you met your significant other. Tell me how it developed. I want excruciating details, everything you said and she said and what you both did until you finally stuck your dick in her pussy.
This can't be that fucking hard. I thought I was free of the need for pussy but it just came back crashing hard. I'm going to get some hookers and/or escorts this week without fail, but alas, sex is not enough. I need a relationship. I need to feel what love feels like.
Help me before I snap.
Alright, I'm fucking done
>I choke and freeze when talking with them. I'm boring, never had a passion or hobbies and spent all my life behind a computer. Not a good career either, still wageslave on a deadend job.
you're too high inhib. Simple as that. more like a vegetable than an animal
have you tried getting drunk and then talking to girls?
What's that supposed to mean?
Yes, I got drunk pretty much anytime I wanted to score and/or was in a social environment. Still no dice.
Anyway, now I feel I'm too old for this shit. All my friends moved on and I have 0 social life outside work and gym. Where would I even start at this point?
I went in an online anime chatroom with mostly just Americans (this was unintentional, i didn't know it'd only be Americans), and my profile was set to show that I am from the Netherlands (which i really am).
???
PROFIT
I was somewhat active in the chat, and several of the women were interested in me. They never admitted that it was because of my nationality, but when talking to them, it's really obvious that this was the reason. They kept swooning over my "euro accent" and how hot it supposedly was. One of the women I started e-dating, but it was a tough situation because i had to choose between two women that both wanted to e-date me, but I got to see both of their tits on camera first so it was cool.
I ended up meeting her in person, we kissed and had sex on the first day so that's how i lost my virginity.
The internet is a magical place, if you are from a 1st world European
country
start by talking to girls, im in a similar position but im 21
Ok OP. I'm going to do this for you, because I feel bad for you. I'll tell you how I met my SO i've been with for 5 years.
Literally just sent her a message saying "Hey" and talked to her like I would any other friend. I talked about music, my hobbies and what i was doing in that moment. Women are just humans honestly, pretend youre talking to someone you know.
I don't have friends. How do you talk to friends? Or humans? Help
Well you're talking to me and I'm a human so you're not completely hopeless. If you have any family, just imagine their your family. Breaking the ice is one of the harder parts of speaking to a girl, but you just got to do it.
user what advice would you give to a 27 yo version of yourself?
my mates are all in long term relationships now and It's only imminent before they all get married and start having kids. I'm not a robot but I don't have any interesting hobbies and basically just work and come home. I honestly can't see anything changing and in 5 years I really do feel i'll be in your position.
kissing is weird anyways
>32
>Actual diagnosed autist
>Met my wife at work
>She came on to me because I was 'interesting' even though I had a gf at the time
>Didn't have sex with her until I'd left the gf I was living with
>downside was I had to move in with her straight away because I had nowhere else to live
>been together 5 years now
I fucking hate it. Pussy isn't that great, people just base their lives around it for reasons that escape me. I'd rather just play Final Fantasy.
Where did you meet your previous girl, fellow autismfag?
Your life was my life from 20 onwards
What I can say is
>get your own place if you don't have it (I don't. Used to rent but ended up in debt and had to move back with parents)
>get a car
>if you still socialize with your friends, never miss an opportunity to do so. You won't meet people locked in your house, and the best way to meet women is through friends
This is what I gathered anyway. If you have 0 social standing, you'll probably never make it just like me.
Go out by yourself frequently. Talk to everyone and anyone. Remove any expectations of anything other than that you are out trying to make friends. Give women YOUR number, do not take theirs. If they text you, you will know they are definitely interested. After you succeed in this milestone, start going out with the same mindset of meeting friends, but try to start picking up on non-verbal cues. This part blew my fucking mind because they do it nonstop and I was too autistic to have noticed. Now, it's like an airhorn going off.
Good luck.
I've been in near constant relationships since I was 20.
The first I met on an Autism website and I moved 500 miles away from home under the guise of attending university but really it was because I was desperate and never thought I'd feel the touch of a woman.
It lasted 2 weeks and I was stuck in a different country.
I made it my mission to find another girl, so I would down two pints of whiskey each night for courage and have my flat mate take me to a club since he was also looking for a girl.
One night I did what I usually did and walked up to a girl and just said "Hello my name is user, I think you look really beautiful", she told me to go away like they usually did. But a week later she saw me out again and said "I remember you, you were that cute guy from the other night". We stayed together for 4 years.
Unfortunately after that time my life fell apart, the job I was at got a new manager who resented me and would constantly change plans on me at the last minute which triggered my autism badly so I was left with no job, then my mom got terminal cancer so I had to move back home and my then gf wouldn't come with me.
I lived in the cold shed in the garden since there was no room for me at my parents house. I went on a dating site and one girl would talk to me a lot. She was very obese but very nice to me, then my mom died so I moved 100 miles away again to live with this girl.
That was the one before the girl I'm with now.
elaborate on the non-verbal cues if you can?
I met my wife on fetlife because I'm a degenerate who is into femdom when I was like 28. I'm almost 34 now. It worked out because she's into it as well and was the one who messaged me first. I did have decent body back then because I was a roiding gymcel with nothing going for me at the time. Had shit job, no friends, and lived with my mom despite having an engineering degree since I was an autist who didn't interview well. Guess I got lucky because I found a job that paid twice as much in her state and moved out so it all fell in the place. 5-6 years ago I would have never seen myself where I am right now.
I'm 24 and not only have I never had a GF I've never even had female friends and am not sure how to start
Has my die already been cast? I already feel like I'm years from being in shape to get one
Even if you get a GF, you are already so broken inside that you will never truly love her.
The shitposting would be nice if it would stop. I just want one place with normalfags shitting it up.
Fuck
I just want to cuddle with a girl
Sure. Non-verbal communication is purely contextual, so the hardest part isn't identifying it. It's know when and how to respond to it. Here are a few:
>she plays with her hair
Subtle signal that's incredibly easy to mistake as someone being comfortable (or, they actually are uncomfortable). This is kind of a tough one. She might be over the conversation or really into it. Keep looking for more signs.
>she mirrors your actions
Check your phone, look at a wall clock if there is one, take a drink, etc. Is she following your lead? Yes? She's interested bro. Keep talking and don't forget to ask questions. Include her in the conversation.
>she repeatedly touches you while she's talking, playfully hits you, or always seems close to you (even if you're ever in a group setting)
Big sign. If she's making excuses to be around you, talk to her immediately. Peak signal.
>she casually puts her arm up and her hand starts subtly massaging her neck, playing with a necklace, or in general doe eyed
You're in the end zone.
Just join POF, Okcupid, Tinder, and Bumble simultaneously and take a smiling picture in good light. Unless you're an absolute chud you'll nail some fatty within a month or so. Don't be afraid to be a little forward and "creepy", the ones who actually want to fuck you won't mind.
women don't want entitled incels like you
Is it okay if I have my cousin in the photo with me, and have her pose as my girlfriend?
I read somewhere that women love men like Chad because they see that Chad is really popular with women, it's like a confirmation bias thing where they know Chad is desirable, because he is already desired by other women, or something like that. So if they look at my Tinder photo and see me with another woman, they will think i'm desirable.
Smile, full body, some oh-so-quirky/action/talent/ "exciting"/well-traveled photo are the only 3 you need. Don't be fat or ugly. You'll be beating away the fatties, uglies, single moms, and poly skanks! You'll get laid at least, and if your standards are low enough, you'll keep one of them.