I've been waiting all my life for something to happen. But that something never happens. I don't even know what it is

I've been waiting all my life for something to happen. But that something never happens. I don't even know what it is.

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Man, I don't like the tough love shit, but it won't happen on its own if you just spend all your time in your room. You gotta find something you can work towards to. It sounds cliche as fuck, but opportunities only start showing themselves if you put yourself out there. It's normie wisdom, yes, but it's also true.

Im in the same boat as you user, i guess we are waiting to sink. What do you do day to day if i may ask?
What this user says is true, but it so fucking hard, you fail so much u just lose hope. Once that happens its just down from there u end up just wallowing in pain.

I already know this. But it's so hard to get out of bed. Nothing seems worth archiving or pursuing.

> What do you do day to day if i may ask?
Eat, sleep, stare at discord, youtube and Jow Forums.

yep, i lost hope too]
life sucks
no one has an actual purpose

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I suffocate
And promise me you won't resuscitate
And if I change my mind it's far too late
I'm wasting my days as I've wasted my nights and I've wasted my youth
You're waiting for something you've waited in vain because there's nothing for you
Suffocation

Make it happen user!
Dont wait for a so called destiny

i do the same user, it sucks i guess. But its what we find comfortable. Changing feels like its impossible too much of a risk. Ending just feels easier or staying the same feels good. Do have any mental illnesses, im guessing u have?

I got stuck a bit the same, I just found no opportunities really presented themselves like they did for others. I still have university stuff I suppose but I never got any of those lucky breaks other people always seemed to get.

Hm the usual I guess. Depression, social anxiety. Had a shizo episode back in 2017.
>Changing feels like its impossible too much of a risk
I don't even know what to change. Getting a job doesn't make anything better.

nobody just randomly turns into an isolated neet, it happens because every time they "find something they can work towards" they attempt it and get inevitably thwarted outside forces (usually social and political rejection by normies, though often just plain ineptitude too).

longterm boyfriend left me and I got denied from every college I applied to, drank my feelings for 8 months and then went to therapy because I was bored and nothing was happening in my daily life anymore. Sober now but still lonely all the time but I have opportunities to meet new people now from work and pretending to be interested in therapy. Unless I think I'm just pretending and its actually working. Not sure why I'm posting a reply but I really connected with this. Try something you know you dont want to do and just pretend to give it a shot. Worse case scenario you just dont do it again but at least there was an attempt.

thwarted by* oops
how do you afford it?
you know this board's supposed to be 18+ right?
same here. I'm doing a phd in a dead end field at a mediocre school, fucked up my one chance at a good school (intense insomnia came out of nowhere and I had to drop out), and nobody in this program really gives a shit about me or my work. it's pretty abysmal.

what kind of job do you have? how did you muster up the willpower to apply for and attend a job and everything? how long were you dating and why did he break up?

I'm 25. It's my birthday in a few days though. I'll be lonely then too.

You're lucky you go to school. I didn't pass high school and I live on a ranch in what's quickly becoming a warzone due to cartels and auto-defense fighting each other. I'm going to be a poor butcher for the rest of my short life. Americans are born lucky.

Im not the best to give advice, you seem similar to me. I supposed there really is no special fix. In my mind i've got that kind of "escaped the matrix" kind of view. I can't look at live the same way as others, it just seems so bleek. I dunno if ur the same, its seems like it. Its like if u dont care about money, relationships are impossible for u and ur not passionate about anything there is no reason to live. I guess we are just not cut out for life user, maybe we'll get lucky.

>how do you afford it?
Leeching of my parents of course. Feels kinda bad but they never mention or say anything about it. I guess they know I'm a lost cause and have no chance in the real world. They pay for everything but I have literally no money for myself. It's not like I would need it anyways. I just stay in my room all day and stare at the wall.

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Me too. But I'm 31 and I've got some experience.

I can tell you that if you want something to happen YOU have to go put the effort in to make it happen. The world owes you shit and more likely than not it will squeeze you one way or another.

This doesn't mean that sometimes good things do just randomly happen to you that alter your life for the better, things beyond your control. They are so fucking rare though; but if you put in the EFFORT these rare events become less rare.

But I do totally understand that feeling of wondering when something will happen. Like a sign or a new path in life springs in front of you.

Destiny and all that is a fucking meme.

I work retail at a clothing store right now until I finally decide on inevitably going into trade school because I refuse to live off minimum wage my whole life, my boyfriend and I were together for a little over 3 years and he left me because things just change I guess he never really told me exactly why but its not my place to try and make someone stay if they dont want to either. I managed to get a job because I was spending every morning and night alone, nobody was talking to me and I wasnt talking to them either. I downloaded some apps, I spoke to my therapist about my want for getting a job and she hooked me up with a job employment specialist. No money charged to me at all, I just asked what my opportunities were

there's effectively no point to school unless it gets you into some kind of stable social support network (ex. a job where people don't hate you, a field where people respect or at least like you, etc.). Sloughing away in silence and having your efforts go perpetually ignored and getting paid dickall is effectively the same experience as being a poor butcher anyway. At least you can always hold out hope that someone from a cartel will shoot you in the cross-fire. Guns are illegal here, so killing myself is very difficult.
I do the same to an extent. I still live with my parents because last time I tried moving out I had a massive breakdown and dropped out of grad school. I can't really leave because I'm attached to my room and my cat. I earn a bit of money from school but my parents recognize me as a lost cause too (I'm not really going to be able to go anywhere with this degree since it's a bit of a meme degree and my professors don't care enough to look at my papers, so I won't have much of a publication record either). I often go days at a time not talking to anyone, I kind of just take up space and breathe and consume. I can't even sleep, really. like I fail at the one thing that literally everyone is supposed to be able to do, including reptiles. It's like god wants me to stay up and experience the most hollow kind of life for the longest period of time possible, I wish I could at least sleep since that's almost like a temporary respite/death.

But yeah, leeching off parents is difficult. On some level you recognize you're utterly inept and sort of just an evolutionary accident that contributes nothing to anyone. That's hard to live with.

> I can't look at live the same way as others, it just seems so bleek
That's how I feel as well. I never understood how they do it. How they find meaning and enjoyment in such things.
> I guess we are just not cut out for life user, maybe we'll get lucky.
Seems like it. I just hope it won't last much longer.

how long did it take you to get over him? don't you get bored or lonely at the job? do you have friends there or are you alone there too? I find working regular jobs really hard because of the isolation. it's different in grad school since at least some isolation's expected or people think you're just busy if you never talk to anyone. in regular jobs people immediately recognize you as defective when they sense that you can't socialize. it's one of the reasons I never bothered getting a real job, even though I have an employable undergrad and it's not difficult to get a job. I just can't wrap my head around socializing. I've been this way since I was like 6-7, I don't think there's any escaping.

From a young age I've always been anti social, classic dumb story about being bullied all the way through highschool until I got lucky enough a guy I sort of liked actually was interested in me, he also lurked on Jow Forums we had alot in common. I'm still not over it and I'm probably never going to be, I've always just forced myself to socialize because I know if I dont I'm going to end up alone. When my boyfriend dumped me none of the people I thought were my friends came and checked up on me and nobody really asked me to hangout or anything along those lines. My coworkers smoke together on their breaks and I make small talk with them there, it's all an act though and I know that I dont really enjoy them much but that's because I dont know them well. Maybe some day I will? Maybe some day I'll quit this job and meet people at my next, or at school, as long as I stay doing something and keep a routine I'm at least seeing another person. To me this option is better than what I was doing isolated and alone in my room, because every so couple months something good actuslly happens. But I cant tell if that's a pathetic way to live or just getting by.

can your coworkers sense that you're a robot? do you think they like you? i had to go to this awful departmental party thing and i genuinely tried being social. like i asked all the meme smalltalk questions that everyone else around me was asking, except unlike other people i just got one-word responses from people. then those same people magically gravitate away from me and towards other people and form closed groups with other strangers. I don't know how normies do it or how they sense magically that there's something wrong with me.

Its so weird life is all we know its supposed to sooo important yet its just so trivial to us. I guess how we have been treated in life and i guess how we were born, we lost our desire, our hope at some point. We are like a glitch, people will say its fine buts its not really, just live life xd. I dunno about u user, but im heading to the doctor to hopefully find some magic answer soon. Shit, at least i would have at least tired to salvage my life. I hope u find your answers user sooner rather than later. Shit like maybe the dice will roll something nice for u one day.

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I usually come in alone and leave alone and alot of my coworkers have significant others who come into the store from time to time. I'm not open about my lack of a social life but they've picked up on the fact nobody comes into the store to see me, i feel like a newbie and that's the vibe i think i give off is that I'm new and i dont have much going on for me. I made a joke about it once or so at an attempt of socializing but the way I was raised has made it for me to hide anything that emotionally bothers me so I really dont think my coworkers see me as a robot. If they do, then I dont know about it. I really enjoy talking to you though and I hope sharing my expierence helps you. If you have anything you wanna ask go ahead(:

Look at your natal birth chart, if you have a yod pattern, then something will happen.

You sound just like me except I quit my job awhile back and haven't been able to get one since. At least you have a job.

all because of luck and self awareness. I hate that I have therapy of all things to thank for this job but still, money is money and I still gotta live

I'm broke, living with parent and can't get a new job despite sending out 126 applications. I'm so fucked. I need to get a job and move out soon or I'm just going to neck myself as I see no way out of this hole I'm in

Just stopping by OP

Going to school and getting a job doesn't necessarily help, maybe it would for you but it was not a long term fix for me. I had to take out student loans so now I'm a poorfag. Going to school will still turn you into the same wagie that works at the 7/11 down the street. You make more, you owe more - it's a wash. I live at home, I could move out but I would become a paycheck to paycheck no retirement statistic. Don't say, "get a real STEM degree" I got a degree in Mechanical Engineering.

I did exactly this to the tee to my exgf and I regret it every day. My family constantly said they didn't like her, my friends kept telling me I could do better, and eventually after 3 years of being brainwashed by them every day I finally decided to end our relationship even though we were happy. Two years later she's in a great relationship with someone else and I haven't had a single meaningful date that entire time. I shot myself on the foot because I let other people live my life for me.

I went and saw a therapist about a year ago and he told me I was just "sad". I think it's about time I try another therapist, and actually tell them I think about killing myself every day. It's the perpetual nothingness that gets to me. I am the 9-5er indebted to slave away for the next 40 years chasing the paid off student loan. I would sooner take myself out of the equation, I didn't have any cosigners. A final, if pitiful and minuscule revenge on the fucking banks that ruined this generation before it could even get started.

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Look for a job employment specialist, they have connections to agencies and will get you a job even if its shitty, and then use that experience to move up (if possible and feel like you can)

Like a temp agency? I'm from California and have honestly never heard of a job employment specialist.

Normal therapy offices tend to have resources they can point you to

Oh, I see. Thanks. Maybe I'll go to a therapist sometime. Although last time I had an appointment they had to cancel my appointment 30 minutes before it started while I was waiting in the parking lot