ITT: Greentext the last hour of your life

>scream
>jerk off
>refresh image boards
>twinkie
>refill cup of box wine
repeat until asleep or dead

>load up e621
furry coomer

>make mac and cheese
>get a bottle of water
>go to room and eat while watching videos of 1950's japan
>cat fell in bin trying to climb up to my desk, get mad bc she keeps doing it
>finish eating (finally)
>nothing to do, drawing time
>do 10m worth of drawing on extra WIPs i have lying around in my art folder
>tablet dies, cba to restart pc so give up
>go on for channel dot org
here i am

>be me
>grocery shopping
>get some crackers and humus
>attend DND with friends

>tossing and turning in bed trying to get to sleep
>give up on sleeping
>make cup of tea and sit in living room

>woke up
>fell outta bed
>dragged a comb across my head

*Dabs* you caught me

>come home from work slightly buzzed
>eat dinner my mum made
>browse dating app
>chat this one girl
>get bored and fap
>shower
and here i am

>Napping after just thinking about how napping mid day is bad.
>Play some Elona+
>Go to the kitchen and eat some ranch dusted vegie sticks.
>Crank one out to a big butt thread on /d/
>Go into Jow Forums see a couple coomer threads
>Feel self conscious
>Think I should probably quit pron
>Go onto this thread

>pulled frozen chicken breast from the freezer and put in warm water to defrost
>took a shower while chicken defrosts
>finish my nightly routine except for brushing teeth
>cut up chicken, season, and cooked in pan with a little sesame oil
>add two eggs and cooked white rice for bulk
>currently sitting at desk eating my meal, listening to some music that makes me wish I was high.
After this I'm gonna clean up the kitchen, brush teef, and go to bed.

Attached: midgetpull.jpg (799x600, 63K)

>sittin at laptop
>get bored of minecraft and join a discord call with online friends
>barely talking
>still can't plan a D&D session
>still bored

>sit on sofa with dogs
>hernia hurts
>knees hurt
>have conversations on my head with teachers i havent seen for 18 years
>get into argument with a manager i havent seen in 4 years, in my head
>imagine my suicide
>accidentally scream at the voices, startling dogs
>feel bad and give dogs treats and belly rubs

Attached: 65313697_2330340987203778_2681255071169748207_n.jpg (1080x1080, 125K)

>open laptop
>go to steam
>try to decide what to play
>"I remember having alot of fun in this game"
>click on game
>look at main menu
>click quit
>close laptop
>cry

tell us about the manager

>wrote some plot structure for books/world building details
>worked out
>currently watching supernatural with my boy/idling Jow Forums

>going through social media of 10/10 autistic underage qt posted on here last night
>find out she's a lesbian thot and hates older guys who ask her out
>don't know what to do so come back here

>10/10 autistic underage qt
which one

>Made chicken soup for the family
>Sister doesn't like it
>Mom doesn't like it
>Dad said he liked it but I know he didn't
>Mom and dad eat it regardless
>Sister leaves the plate on the table and I ate hers
>Clean up the kitchen
>Have a shower
>Go to bed and have imaginary conversations with my imaginary wife (not anime related)

Attached: IMG_20190916_194707000~2.jpg (1306x1117, 195K)

if it's the horrible chick I think it is, for shame

did you forget the noodles?

>finished reading akira (great manga and movie)
>finished my bowl of popcorn
>about to play league with friend
life is alright?

Attached: kaneda.png (478x559, 565K)

I put just a tiny amount

What makes her horrible?

>be me
>found animator on youtube that talks about his life
>he's a furry
>slight doubt
>his content is quality
>no annoying furfur shit
>looks cute in general
>fast forward, I've watched 5 of his videos and already subscribed to him

The one who had the thread about her last night.
I'm not going to put her name on here, although I did find it.

uhh who got it

He was a prick and a bully.

>driving home from shitty painting job
>cars engine light comes on

>reading "The Call of Cthulhu"
>get distracted
>browse Jow Forums
>go back to reading
>repeat

>blew my mind out in a car
>a crowd of people stood and stared

>class is over
>wait for bus
>bus doesnt drop me off next to my house like the other bus i take
>sit in student lounge until the last free shuttle bus arrives
2.60$ saved

Attached: 7C9D9F06-F33B-44A4-978C-866391701641.jpg (606x618, 59K)

>clean my .45 so it doesn't jam
>Place it on the side of my head
>Start screaming and calling myself a faggot
>Cry like a bitch and curl up into a ball
>get up
>put gun back in my drawer
>Go outside and sit in my old swing
>watch the sunset and cry some more
>think about what it would be like to have friends
>walk back inside and snack on some applesauce
>go on fucking r9k and pretend like someone would talk to me from there
>feel my .45 eyeing me from inside of its drawer
its certainly an acquired taste

Attached: moonwounds.jpg (1080x810, 31K)

comfy responsible gun owner

>went to magic tournament: standard
>supposed to be at 6:30 pm
>arrive at 6:20 pm
>only one there
>shop owner says people never show up for standard
>drive to mcdonalds and get a number 9 meal
>come home to 3 hour queue for WoW
>start browsing Jow Forums and eating my food

i bought this deck for 30 dollars and i have yet to use it
itll be going out of standard in 2 weeks
sigh

>So fucking drunk right now
>goddamn it's Monday
>I have a problem don't i?

>come home to 3 hour queue for WoW

hol up... people actually pay to wait in a line?

*Ahem*
FUCK STANDARD
AND ALSO FUCK COMMANDER

Attached: 1544232900936.jpg (511x671, 41K)

>Be me
>Woke up from nap
>Go to kitchen
>Get plate of spaghetti
>Add cheese
>Drink water
>Browse Jow Forums with music

Yeah.. Pretty fucking boring.

you pay for game time
im able to transfer my character for free
but i want to be able to play on the most popular
so at around 1pm on weekdays a queue starts up from 5 minutes then when it hits 2 or 3 pm the queue is at 2 hours or so. at dinner time its 3+ hours.

yeah i was hoping eldraine would be kind to my wallet
but 3 of some of the best mono-red cards all cost $4+ dollar apiece, looking at a minimum of roughly 60 dollars not including the other replacements i have to make

>finish uni homework and procrastinate studying for an important quiz I have tomorrow
>go up to my apartment
>lay on couch with girlfriend normies get out REEEEE
>play nondegenerate modded skyrim

>poop
>poop
>poop
>poop
>poop
>poop
>poop

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>Sat on the computer refreshing Jow Forums over and over again.

Attached: 32lk09ulq2o21.png (1000x1144, 186K)

oh i think I finally get it. the story if this pic is she was off sucking dick and now regrets it, right? explains the knees at least i guess idk.

>work finishes a bit later than usual
>drive home
>less traffic since i left later
>need something for dinner, but too lazy to cook this late
>buy a frozen pizza
>need something to wash it down
>buy a few bottles of whisky
>get home, cook pizza, drink whisky, post on Jow Forums

>Brain dead and twitching from carbon dioxide hypoxia, as the global concentration of C02 exceeds 40k ppm by 2030.

>just finished writing down how much my card collection is worth and how to divide it if it cant be sold all at once
>explain that my dog should be put down with me since no one else cares for that ugly mutt
>my cousin fulfilled my fantasy of smothering her milf toes onto my face
>and flashes me her sweaty f cups
>tell my brothers that they should just donate my video games rather than sell them to gamesynagoge
yep

you don't get rugburn from sucking dick... faggot

>go downstairs
>down an elevator
>all is dark down here
>get to a place with water
>some spooky bitches fuck my ass over and over for a bit
>go up instead
>full of skinny dudes in pairs
>take a bit but got past them
>Then there's a bigger guy with some more skinny dudes
>kills me and I alt f4 out of dark souls

u got paypal?

>at work
>stuff fruit in containers
>say hi to retarded cleaner
>help Filipino coworker get stuff

Damn, user. That sounds like a pretty busy hour. How much are your cards worth? Why was your cousin flashing you and sticking her feet in your face?

>watch YouTube
>get cereal
>get on le chan
>shit
pretty much it. I just went back to YouTube till now.

>looking for job
>watching stargate
>making pizza now
thrilling, hope the glows enjoy

i think one of us misread the thread. i thought we were writing out what we would do before we die, and not my most recent hour.....
i dont have a paypal nor do i know how much my shit is worth but i estimate 1200~. not much but it should help with the funeral

Literally the same as everyone else's
>feel dizzy
>collapse
>last of what I see are my own legs, ceiling or sky
>if I had music playing I would hear it as I fade away forever

>be me
>make porkchop
>eat porkchop
>get on r9k
>see nasty ass shit eating whore thread
>ok.gif
>see this thread
>reply

>sit
>make depressed spotify playlist
there, the past several hours

>finished a movie
>got to page 3 in a book
>browsed Jow Forums and listened to anco
>talked to a girl on discord for 5 minutes
>neither of us said anything the whole time
>she hangs up
i'm bad at formatting

>Smoke weed
>Eat homemade dinner w gf
>Practice bass
>Watch vampire diaries w gf

>be me in hospital
>dad is dying from cancer so Im here to help him
>order food get him the special: chicken parmesan
>nurse shift ends and comes in another
>Yolly enters
>say bye to negress who was caring for dad
>Yolly keeps saying my name over and over
>feelsweirdman but let me.lookat your butt
>step putside because im an autistic
>go to 10th floor because snack machine doesnt work in my floor
>see old lady in the corner of the room (cancer patient)
>say hi to her in a jolly way because she looked sad and lonely
>choose some peanuts and make my way
>realize I forgot to say bye
>look through the door once I exist
>shes staring at me
>looks kind of scary man like shes a ghost or something
>go back to my floor
>Yolly is still giving strange signals
>its not like I can fuck you here bruh.jpg
>she exist the room
>dick is chubby
>go back to browsing r9k

I wish I could smash her brains out but thats not happening my dad is dying

Attached: 1568492409984.jpg (720x960, 64K)

Ive never seen a gun before. Pics of gun?

What type of cancer does your dad have?

You should leave this place if you are mentally disabled

how have you never seen a gun?

Attached: 20170831_101039.jpg (580x397, 75K)

he thinks you're someone from his discord

>wake up, it's getting dark out
>bad dreams again
>roll last of tobacco into cigarette
>walk down the block, it's windy and the sky is full of dark storm clouds
>finish cigarette, walk into corner store, get steel reserves
>head home, turn on PC, see this thread, post

He has AML

are you fags diabetic

I assume when you die, your brain gives out....? I wouldn't be able to stand if I was dying

>be me
>be a fucking nigger who fishes for irrelevant upvotes on reddit
>go on r9k
>Make 2 threads
>one is about greentexting the first blowjob you got/given
>other one is about greentexting the last hour of your life
>thread goes on for some time
>snip it and post it on r/greentext
>get upvotes

I fucking hate reddit niggers.

>talk with mother and brother about schedule
>order grass fed whey protein isolate, unflavored
>play small stakes online poker while eating popcorn while dogs bug me for some

Attached: shrug.jpg (1080x720, 213K)

>be me
>coom
>die

>browse Jow Forums
>listen to death grips
>shitpost

Unironically Based and Anglo-Pilled. Bravo anons, you made my day

Test money two tree for six

>be humgry
>make perogies
>watch Sam Hyde stand up
>feminist wrecked
>make a cup of tea
>browse Jow Forums
>thamk you perogies and tea

Attached: 1565675030064.jpg (900x873, 206K)

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?WHY CAN'T YOU JUST MAKE SENSE!!?!?!?

>lying in my home, geriatric and bed-ridden
>surrounded in nice luxurious things
>surrounded by no one
>no one who loves me, no one who cares about me
>ask myself if it was worth it as I slip away, to be forgotten completely within hours

What game was it?
(O'reginald)

>my dog should be put down with ne

You dying or something

based and brotherpilled

>After this I'm gonna clean up the kitchen
Good for you, user. A clean home is a cozy home

I'm sorry your family didn't like it :(
>Sister leaves the plate on the table
Bad imouto
>Clean up the kitchen
Love seeing clean Anons

>called doctor's office to make an appointment
>receptionist asked me a question
>I answered
>she said 'good answer'
>honestly made my day

I'm in a good mood now.

>drink some whiskey
>stare at phone on chins
>play with rattie boys
>feed all the pets
>stare at phone

>Play WoW
>Mind stews over the fact my life is fucked
>can't handle playing WoW
>go outside to get some fresh air
>come back in and cheer myself up
>"Gonna start a podcast today"
>record 5 minutes
>listen to my shitty voice and want to cry
>get up and go outside for 15 minutes
>decide to finish recording podcast
>listen to my shitty voice an want to cry
>think about how to improve my life
>want more than anything to have wife and kids
>realise i will never have a wife or kids
>contemplate throwing myself inffront of a bus
>decide to browse r9k for the first time

Have you ever played through new londo ruins b4?

>I did some homework and shit
>Made my self some tea
>drank the tea
damn that was some good tea

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Had something similar happen to me
>ask receptionist fro a flush
>tell her I habe no idea whatthat is but thats what the nurse asked for
>she giggles and then breaks i to a laughter
>tells me Im funny

Made my day but I genuinely dont know what a flush is. This was the second time I made her laugh. It had been so long since someone called me funny, what a cutey

Attached: 1568141827282.jpg (480x530, 45K)

>Working on some art for a portfolio application
>Stopped to play some megaman X on my switch
>Got some snacks
>Took a shower
>Now going to sleep

I was curious, so I did some research. Do you think she meant a saline flush?