/r9gay/ - #835

Beards look cool but are unattractive as hell

>tfw no smol brother bf that I can protect

Beards are sexy but I don't think they're hot

You may appreciate them more when you're older.

If you're bishy, get on Tinder and they'll be all over you.

Well if you have a dog and live in the upper midwest maybe i could whore myself out to you too. My friend also wants to watch but she lives on the other side of the country so i might have them film it, not sure. Could maybe post it somewhere if enough people are interested

please adopt me ill cook for you

>tfw no failed artist bf

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With insurance, it costs about $10,000 a year to do that.

i can work part time to pay you back no problem

How smol are you? I'm 5'7" 120 pounds

Adopting a brother? Is that possible? What can you cook?

ill cook anything you want, but i love making curry and pastries

Good, it's settled, I'll adopt you.

>at work, wearing beige pants
>bored out of my mind death
>start thinking about doing lewd things with my future bf
>some time into this, as I'm trying to hide my boner I notice a wet spot on my pants
>leaked so much precum it seeped through my underwear and pants
Twice.

Stop wearing shitty whitey tighties like an nasty old het and get some nice boxer briefs or trunks.

I was wearing boxers though.

Stop wearing shitty boxers then. They get bunched up.

>tfw no white-haired bf

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>hurr durr
I think you're just jealous of my copious precum production. Stay mad, drycuck.

>tfw no smug white-haired omnipotent bf

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I just think they look cumbersome and a bit gross to be around.
Or it could be that I hate any sort of facial hair on myself.

I'm 23 which makes me pretty ancient.
But serious, maybe? I just think smooth faces look much better.

>cutie asked me to help him go vegan shopping

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>vegan shopping
DISS GUST TANG

>vegan shopping

PUKE

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you do realize that we feel exactly like straight people, right?

we just like guys lmao

>tfw no /fa/ or Jow Forums bf

conspicuous consumption and guns are things I don't like

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kroni was the best

did he die or something?

also what happened to hein

tfw no cute naive clingy german bf anymore because I am unable to maintain stable relationships/friendships to other people.

I've been getting into both, but I still don't know much about either

I'm gonna give this a shot and spam this in the last couple of threads.

Marcel, If you're reading this I hope you're doing well. I tried adding you again and you didn't accept. That's all okay, if you don't want to talk to me anymore I won't force you.
I just hope you're doing well, you talked before about feeling like people hate you sometimes. And I hope you don't believe I felt that way towards you.

I'm sorry if I couldn't return your feelings. But I meant it when I said I didn't want to take advantage of you. You're too young and too innocent. It hardly seems fitting of a slut like me to take you like some sort of wolf.

But I liked talking to you, I thought you were very smart and sweet and cute. Please don't think I didn't enjoy our time together. If my illness made it feel like apathy then I sincerely apologise, but I truly like you a lot.

That said, if there is a reason for you to not want to talk to me anymore I completely accept it. Perhaps you just found me boring or annoying, or think I'm too much of a disgusting slut and that's fair. i just wanted you to know I like you and I hold no ill will towards you.

Have a wonderful life even if we don't talk again, Marcie

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Go fuck yourself normalcunt. Blog your drama somewhere else.

I am too retarded to shave my genitals. I keep cutting myself even if I just use a trimmer to trim it down a bit. Is hair removal creme a viable option?

Trim pubes, yank out hair on base of shaft/balls.

>yank out
How? And the worst part is between my balls and my asshole, I would need some mirrors to even see what I'm doing there.

>he's talking to himself yet again
stop being such a slut marc

>How?
I use my fingers, but you could use tweezers. I've tried wax but had not great experiences trying down there.
And the worst part is between my balls and my asshole, I would need some mirrors to even see what I'm doing there.
Well, what do you expect? Also wax it.

I've always shaved face, genitals and ass with just water and a cheap single-use razor and had zero problems

I cut myself and I get terrible razorburn.

What is razor burn like?

ew
you shave your genitals with same razor you shave face with

No, I keep two different razors. They're the same kind though.

Daily reminder to sluts: kys.

I'm ethically non-monogamous and my body count is three over 4+ years, soon to be four

>ethically non-monogamous
That's a funny way to spell whore.

No, I do it for free, with broke-ass cuties. The rich guys can't take my bants.

You can call it what you want, give any reason you want, it is still sluttery.

How can people get comfortable enough with others to form relationships so quickly
I would like to be able to relax with someone as much as I do with my current best friend before I would get intimate but I've known that guy for almost 9 years now

There should be a balance. For me it takes a couple months, which is slow in modern standards.
Have you told them how you felt? It could be they have no idea, or they just see you as a friend.

Childhood friend turned bf is rare, but very wholesome and nice.

kys phaggots

worded that wrong, I have no intention or desire to bf them, but can't think of bf'ing anyone i don't know that well or can't speak completely frankly with

Oh sorry, it is quite late. Yeah, I am quite the same. Why date someone you don't even know? It just doesn't make sense.

goodnight r9gay
if someone could post a video to sleep to that would be nice

You realize that by trolling like this, you've already conceded the point, right? This thing you want people to like, the 'masc' shit, you're treating it like goatse- sneaking it into the first post, derailing threads with it, posting it when you want to piss people off. Forcing it, like Andy Six's Log, down the throat of boards, because you want to annoy them.

You KNOW it's shit. All you need to do now is understand that you understand this.

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>tfw no bf to take care of me
who will ever want to take care of a chubby autist who wants to make vidya games

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youtube.com/watch?v=HlCKYeQFw3U
How's this?

Could I make you a nullo?

no i wanna be skinny

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Nullos can be skinny.

i wanna be as flat as a plank tho

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Homosexuality is a choice. We know this because of the existence of prison gays, bisexuals, and political lesbians. You have to justify why you choose to be homosexual.

The fix would take too long, I don't have time and I don't want to pass my genes. That said, if I can't find a monogamous relationship, I'll quit it all.

Pretty sure MGTOW would be more inclined to go gay if that were true.
A lot of them weirdly worship men and masculinity, but buy female sex dolls to still have access to the approximation of a female body.

if I'm being honest age related conditions scare the living daylight out of me and one of the few things I don't need more of in my life is melancholy, no matter how grand or serene it is

thanks though

"prison gay" is a thing uggoes say because they're mad that people prefer twinks

Sorry to hear that, I guess I already feel old so it doesn't bother me much - not much beauty to lose.
youtu.be/0Zfpd0s3l6s
Hope this works ok bye

see you tomorrow, origanon!

show me your game

I believe most MGTOW choose not to have relationships with women because modern women are degenerate whore, right?
Gay men have all the problems of women tenfold and on top of that you're a faggot.
I mean in the literal sense of men who have gay sex in prison but are straight otherwise.

>tfw no bf that lets me be his maid and clean up the house and make him food while dressed like a maid

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>have a ridiculously higher rate of STD's
>more likely to be depressed
>over 50% chance to be a straight up pedophile
yeah bro gays are exactly the same except they like man butts and dick xd

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They seem okay with gays, depending on the MGTOW. They think men are capable of a deeper level of love than women, and often site the study that showed that gay male marriages are happier than straight marriages, and lesbian marriages are the most likely to end in divorce.

just drew this cute party pepe

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frogposters Ieave

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I wouldn't be able to resist spanking your butt

Source pedophile statistic.
You'd be depressed in a world with zero confirmation bias as well.
And std's, well... if women weren't gate keepers, our species would have died a long time ago from std's. Thankfully women don't want men as bad as gay men want men, I guess. Enjoy not being wanted by the women you want.

cool beard bro

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what cute things would you do with your bf? I would kiss mine on top of his head and rub his belly

WTF MEAN WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO ME

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Go for walks and look at the color of his eyes in the sunlight, while he's looking out across a river, and the little gleams of light in his hair. Then go home with him and get to touch his arms.

Kiss his neck, bite it a lot. Grab him from behind while he making food. Also sit in his lap while he is working.

Powerful wholesome energy emanates from this post.

you're my maid I can do what I want to you and if you show your butt I gotta spank it

sounds nice I would love a boy sitting in my lap while I work (if he didn't mind me getting a boner(

O-oh o-okay fair e-enough w-what e-else do y-you w-wanna do

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>You'd be depressed in a world with zero confirmation bias as well.
of course you'd blame the world and not yourself.
>if the world was more accepting of us we wouldn't be like this
not a chance, clown face.
>And std's, well... if women weren't gate keepers, our species would have died a long time ago from std's.
you really do think that straight people are just as much as hedonistic sex pigs as you, don't you?

I would probably pretend it wasn't there, maybe accidentally grind a bit. His entire body would have hickeys, I like to mark my territory.

pick you up like in that pic and carry you away ;)

so no 50% pedophile statistic, okay.
And yeah, straight men want sex as much as gay guys, they just can't get it.